‘Where are you?’ I asked.
‘In my apartment, why?’
‘I wanted to check that you weren’t in a television studio.’
‘I’m at home. It’s a day off, actually.’ He let out a sort of chuckle. I tried to keep myself calm but I could feel the anger rising. I could feel it rolling in my stomach; swishing through my blood, filling my head.
‘Don’t rest on your laurels too much George, you don’t want the media to lose interest.’ Francesca shot me a sharp look; Freddie stifled a laugh.
‘Holly, you know why I’m doing this. I’m doing it for us.’ At that moment I honestly believed that he believed what he was saying. He was obviously a victim of psychosis.
‘Whatever. That’s not why I’m phoning you.’ My voice was sharp, cold even. I was trying to antagonise him. If it gave me pleasure, and my life was a little short of that right now, then I was entitled.
‘Why are you phoning me?’
I took a deep breath. ‘George, you’re my oldest friend, you know that. Whatever this is all about, I have never valued a friendship the way I valued ours.’ Good start: when dealing with insanity sound patronising.
‘Me too.’ He sounded pleased, so obviously, it was working.
‘And whatever happens, I hope you remember that.’ I spoke slowly and clearly, as if he was an imbecile, a mad imbecile.
‘Holly what are you talking about?’ Now he sounded confused.
Freddie mouthed, ‘Get to the point.’ I scowled at him.
‘George I’m having a baby.’
‘You’re pregnant?’
‘That’s what I said.’
‘But, how?’ I wondered what was going through his mind at that precise moment. He was probably upset because he thought I meant I was pregnant by Joe which would foil his little plan. Unfortunately that wasn’t the case, but it didn’t hurt to let him think that, to tease him with that thought, for a few seconds anyway.
‘The normal way, George, a little sperm swam up my you-know-what and fertilised an egg. Like most women, ovaries were involved.’
‘I didn’t mean that. How does Joe feel?’ He sounded nervous. He was no doubt imagining his new-found fame crumbling around his arrogant ankles. As much as I would have liked to prolong the agony, the time had come. Not only were Freddie and Francesca gesturing frantically at me to hurry up, but I was also in desperate need to pee.
‘Well he probably feels the same way you do, as I have no idea which one of you is the father.’ Probably could have been a bit gentler with the news, but then, he didn’t deserve it.
‘You mean it might be mine?’ I could almost hear his mind ticking over.
‘Yes, I’m sorry to say the most accurate prognosis of conception date is the end of November or the very beginning of December.’
‘Oh Holly, this is wonderful news.’
‘Really? Well it might not be yours. After all I shagged Joe loads of times and I only had sex with you once.’ Francesca was giving me her stern look again but I was past caring. Whatever I did, I couldn’t make George behave any worse.
‘But it might be. I have to call Cordelia.’
‘George, you’re priceless. I tell you you might be the father of my unborn baby and the first person you want to call is your publicist.’
‘It’s not that.’
‘What is it? You need her to get you some more interviews based on the new developments. What now, This Morning, Coffee Break, London Tonight? All to say how right you were to insist on marrying me, because now I might be carrying your baby. Well, don’t worry, I’ve issued a press release so everyone will know. What you do to exploit the situation is up to you.’
‘I’m sorry you feel like that. If we’re going to be parents then we have to start planning the future.’
‘For God’s sake listen to me—it might not be yours. It might be Joe’s.’
‘Then we’ll have a test.’
‘I’m surprised you want a test, after all if it turns out to be Joe’s then that will be the end of your media career.’
‘But...’
‘Ask Cordelia, I’m sure she’ll recommend not pushing for the test. Besides they’re too risky. I’ve got to go now, bye George.’
‘But Holly, I need to know more. Do we know the sex? Should I come to antenatal with you? Are you eating healthily?’
‘Actually George, we don’t know the sex, I don’t bother with antenatal and I drink shit-loads of brandy and smoke forty cigarettes a day so I don’t have much time to eat.’ I put down the phone.
Francesca was staring at me with her mouth wide open.
‘What?’
‘Imagine for a minute that someone had just told you that you might be about to become a parent, then they followed the news with that tirade. How would you feel?’
‘I don’t give a shit how he feels because he hasn’t considered me in any of this, not at all.’
‘Well, the press has the information; George knows, Joe knows. I guess what happens next is out of our hands now,’ Freddie said reasonably. ‘But Hol, maybe you want to be a bit careful about what you say in future.’
‘I’m sure he wasn’t even listening, he was already imagining the television career he’s going to build on the back of me.’
Despite my bravado and my bitchiness I looked at Freddie and Francesca, put my head in my hands and wept.
‘Bloody hormones,’ I croaked between sobs. ‘They won’t stop making me cry.’
Chapter Thirty-one
Fatherhood
I was going to be a father. I was having a baby. I knew, deep down that the baby was mine. No matter how much Holly tried to protest, or how much she kept on about it being Joe’s, I knew it was mine. It all made sense. Fate had led me to the conclusion that I was supposed to be with Holly, and to make sure that we knew, it had given us a sign—a baby. We were definitely intended to be a family. I couldn’t give up on making her see that. If anything, the baby made me more determined than ever to carry on my crusade. It was only through the media that I would be able to persuade her. The only way.
I could forgive her for being so horrible on the phone. I have to forgive her because she is in a different place to me right now. I know that she will regret her actions, and I know that she will tell me she’s sorry. But that will be the time she tells me that we are meant to be together and that the baby is mine. It will all happen because it’s written in our stars.
I called Cordelia with the good news.
‘Guess what? Holly’s pregnant and it might be mine.’
‘But that would make her over four months.’ Cordelia didn’t miss a trick, which was why she was so good at her job.
‘Exactly.’
‘So, how come we didn’t know about this sooner?’
‘She kept it quiet, but she’s sent a press release out to all the papers.’
‘Well then we better act quickly. Can you get yourself here straight away?’
‘I’ll see you in half an hour.’
We were sitting round the meeting-room table, drinking coffee. Our sexual relationship, or any evidence of it was absent when we were in the office.
‘So, how do you feel?’ she asked me.
‘Elated.’ I was over the moon. Before I asked Julia to marry me I knew that I wanted kids pretty much straight away. I was definitely into being a father. I’d be a good father.
‘But we don’t know for sure it’s yours.’
‘I know.’
‘George, we can’t go to the press saying you’re convinced the baby is yours, they’ll think you’re mad. On the other hand if she has a test, and it turns out to be Joe’s then our story is dead in the water.’ She looked pensive.
‘She said she didn’t want a test.’
‘Really? Well that’s handy. We will tell the press that it must be Holly’s decision to have a test and we’re not going to push her. That way it makes you look as if you’re being ultra-reasonable and it keeps the story alive.’<
br />
‘So it’s good news all round.’
‘It is, very good. Couldn’t be better.’
‘So, what now?’
‘I’m going to call round and offer you for interviews. Papers will want your reaction to the news. Television shows can have you on when they talk about paternity issues, and they all love to flog that topic to death. I’ll get some magazine interviews. Your line is that you are happy, although you don’t know for sure if you are the father. Your main concern now is to take care of Holly, and also to let her make her own decisions about paternity tests and so on. Make it clear that you would love nothing more than to be a father.’
‘Actually I would love to be a father. When she told me and there was this possibility that it might be mine, I was filled with this warmth. It was truly amazing. I might have created a life.’
‘George, save the sentimental crap for the interviews. Right, let’s start setting them up. Do you want to hang around? We could go for dinner after we’ve finished.’
I looked at her and thought about sex. Great sex. ‘Sure thing.’
I smiled as I watched her stand up and go into her office. While I waited in the meeting room with my coffee and the newspapers I imagined Cordelia in action. She is amazing when she works, really something else. She picks up the phone, always manages to get through to the person she wants to speak to straight away, and then she goes in for the kill. She is pretty sexy when she works. After what seemed like hours she returned.
‘What we have here is a situation. The media love it. They all want your response so I’m organising a press conference. We might even get some television coverage, actually I’m sure of it. Sophie is booking us a room for the conference; I’ve arranged it for early evening.’
‘Isn’t that a bit quick?’
‘Not at all, we need it to be in the papers tomorrow, and maybe on the news this evening. We don’t have time to procrastinate.’
‘If you’re sure.’
‘Trust me George.’
‘I do. What about dinner?’
‘It’ll wait until after the press conference. I think you’ll be hungry by then.’ Then she kissed me. ‘That’s something to keep you going until I get you home, bad boy.’ I couldn’t wait.
I just had time to go home and change into a suit before getting a cab to the hotel for the press conference. It wasn’t exactly the Hilton but then it was all arranged at short notice. I was worried that no one would show up. Surely journalists were too busy to drop everything. It would be embarrassing if no one showed. I have to admit to being nervous. I’d seen a number of press conferences on television but had never been the subject of one. Sports stars, TV stars, they were the people who got press conferences, along with parents of missing kids and various other crime victims. So where did my press conference fit in? It must be on the celebrity side. If the press turned up and if there was a good number of them then I would know that I was a star. If they didn’t, then I would sit down with Cordelia and figure out how to make me one.
Cordelia met me in the entrance of the hotel and informed me that we had a full room.
‘They’ve all come, even a television news crew. What I am going to do is to introduce you and tell them that we’re here because of Holly’s pregnancy and then you say a few words—what I told you earlier—then they can ask questions. Try to answer all the questions because you need these guys to be on your side. Ready?’ I nodded.
She led me into the room, and it was just like the press conferences you see on TV. There was a table and two chairs for Cordelia and myself, and then a room full of photographers and journalists. As I sat down the flashbulbs went off as one blinding me. I blinked as the flashing continued. Finally one after another they began to stop until I could see again. I blinked and smiled. These people were all here to see me! Cordelia stood up.
‘Ladies and Gentlemen, I do not need to introduce George Conway, as you’ve all been very supportive of his plight. The reason for this gathering is that we all know that Holly Miller, his marriage-pact girl, is pregnant and unsure if George is the father or not. George wanted to share his reaction to the news with all of you. He will say a few words and then he’ll take questions.’ I smiled at Cordelia and stood up. They were all here for me.
‘I have mixed feelings about the news. On the one hand I am delighted at the thought I could be a father, but because I don’t know for sure I feel reticent. I want everyone to know how happy I am, but there is something preventing me from being completely happy and that is the thought that Joe McClaren might be the father. As you know I love Holly with all my heart and only want to support her through her pregnancy. I have no intention in pushing her to take a paternity test and respect her feelings that this is a decision that she has to make. Thank you.’ I smiled broadly as I sat down. Cordelia nudged me.
‘Don’t look too smug,’ she hissed. I rearranged my facial expression accordingly.
‘Any questions?’ Cordelia asked as people started shouting things out. It was impossible to know who I should listen to. Finally an order emerged, I wondered how these things happened, but had no idea. It was as if I was addressing a rabble, which then subsided and everyone became quite civilised. I’m sure Cordelia must have given them a secret code or something.
‘Do you still love her despite the fact that she has no idea who the father of her baby is?’
‘Yes, I absolutely love her and stand by her.’
‘Why aren’t you pushing for a DNA test?’
‘Because I think that the most important thing now is the health of the baby, and tests are risky on unborn babies. I do not want to put the baby or Holly under undue stress.’
‘What about Joe? Does he want a test.’
‘I don’t know, I haven’t spoken to him.’
‘Do you know the sex of the baby?’
‘No, there is no indication that Holly knows either.’
‘Would you prefer a girl or a boy?’
‘If the baby turns out to be mine, as long as it’s healthy I don’t care about the sex.’
‘Do you still want to marry Holly?’
‘More than ever. She really is the one true love of my life.’
‘Don’t you think she’s a tart?’
‘No, I think she has made some mistakes, but I can forgive her.’
After a few more questions, all along the same lines, we called a halt and stood up, said thank you to everyone for coming and left.
I waited in the lobby for Cordelia who wanted to speak to a few of the journalists and to find out when it might appear on the news. I sat in a faded velvet chair and thought about what had happened. It was amazing, the buzz I continued to get from talking to people about myself. I felt heady, as if I was slightly drunk, even though I hadn’t had a drink.
The cameras had been uncomfortable at first but after a while it was OK. I was thankful that I was photogenic, I looked good in the photos that had been published so far. Life was strange, so much had happened, and now I was able to command the time of important journalists. It amazed me how much we’d achieved.
‘George.’ I looked up and recognised Freddie, Holly’s work colleague.
‘What are you doing here?’
‘I found out about the press conference and thought I’d come and see it for myself. Holly doesn’t know yet, I’m going to go to her place and break the news to her. I hope you’re proud of yourself.’
‘What do you mean?’ I was angry that he had interrupted my high, and was trying to take the shine off my success.
‘I mean that you haven’t considered Holly in any of this. None of it. She has been dragged continually through the mud by you. All the papers think that you two had this long love affair that didn’t exist. You had a one-night stand with her, engineered by you. That’s all, and now you won’t leave her alone. You’re ruining her life and you’re putting the baby at risk.’
‘What crap. You know nothing about me and Holly. We grew up together, we s
hared more than you can ever know. As for love, well you’re wrong, we’re meant to be together.’
‘No, no you’re not. I know that for a fact because I know that Holly loves Joe.’
‘Freddie, I don’t really have time for this, nor am I interested in your opinion. If that baby is mine I intend to play a big part in its life and Holly will eventually realise that we are supposed to be together. Nothing is more certain.’
‘But the baby is probably Joe’s.’
I knew he said that to taunt me. ‘No, I know it’s mine. So if that’s all you’ve come to say then you can leave now.’
‘I should knock your fucking infuriating head off.’
‘Go ahead, the newshounds will be out any minute, I’m sure they would love to see that.’ I smiled as I watched Freddie walk away.
‘Who was that?’ Cordelia asked as she came up to me.
‘Holly’s colleague. He was trying to do a macho “leave her alone” thing.’
‘Well the good news is that the papers are all carrying the story and you’ll be on the Ten O’clock News tonight. It will probably only be a brief mention but we’re lucky because it’s a quiet news day.’ She smiled. ‘You were brilliant, and your reward will be given to you back at my place.’ She licked her lips in that way that drove me crazy. I just couldn’t wait until they were round my cock.
‘Fantastic. Let’s go.’
There is nothing like a good fuck while watching yourself on television.
Chapter Thirty-two
We got got the papers in the middle of the night from King’s Cross Station. I loved that, it was something that Cordelia and I had been doing more often, almost a routine. We would be part of the seedy side of London for a few minutes as surrounded by prostitutes, drunks and the night people, Cordelia would park up her Mercedes while I would get out and buy the tabloids. I always bought the later editions, but the early editions in the middle of the night, that was something else. I would clutch them to my chest while we drove back to Cordelia’s flat. When we got back we would lay the papers out, and go through them, one at a time. Both with the same sense of anticipation. When we found something about me, I would get so excited that I would barely be able to read the copy. In just a few weeks, this had become addictive.
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