by Lexi Blake
She was afraid she already knew. The bills had stopped coming. At first she thought it was because of the move, but Ashley seemed so calm and happy. She was talking about going to college. She wasn’t worried all the time. “He paid off my sister’s medical bills.”
“Bingo. See, you’re a smart girl after all. So to sum all of this up, you lost a year and a half you could have spent with your Dom because you were too stubborn to tell him you loved him. You got your ass shot because you were too stubborn to ask for help. You’re going to lose your Dom because, hmmm, wow, there’s that stubborn thing again.”
“I get your point.”
He softened slightly, leaning forward. “There’s a reason men like Ryan and I become Doms. The world seems easier to deal with when it’s black and white. We’re not good at dealing with shades of gray, so we sign contracts that spell out everything we need and everything we’re supposed to do. It makes us feel safe because it doesn’t allow a lot of room to fuck up. And we still manage to fuck up. That’s where the sub comes in. What’s the first job of the submissive?”
“To obey the Dom.”
“You’re right, at least to my thinking. Not according to Jake and Adam’s wife, though. Those books of hers. Yuck. She seems to think a sub’s first job is to save her Dom because if the sub doesn’t, he’ll end up tied up in contracts and a world without a lick of color in it. It’s all bullshit, but that’s what she says.”
A single moment rushed through her memory.
Ryan walking off the airplane with a bundle of flowers in his hand. How hard had it been to keep them from being crushed? He’d likely had to hold them the whole flight. “They reminded me of your hair. All golds and browns and reds. I couldn’t stop myself.”
He hadn’t trusted her to stand beside him, but then, she’d never promised him she would. She’d been so scared of looking like a fool, but love was more important than pride. More important than being right. More important than anything.
“I can’t let him go.”
Taggart’s head fell back, and he sighed in relief. “Thank God. Does that mean you’ll fuck him?”
“You’re kind of the worst fairy godmother ever, you know.”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. Do you intend to fuck him?”
He was obnoxious. “Yes.”
Taggart got up and stretched as though this whole exercise had been tiring. “Then I would say I’m pretty fucking good. But the next time I have to play fairy godmother, I’m shoving a wand up someone’s ass.” He smiled, a wolfish leer. “The good news is, I really like shoving things up a pretty sub’s ass. And after everything you’ve put him through, expect something up yours. That dude hasn’t had sex since you broke up. He’s probably going to be an animal.”
Her whole body lit with excitement because she knew one thing. He was her animal, and it was long past time to claim him.
Chapter Six
Ryan looked around the dungeon, his heart heavy. It was so odd. He’d taken the job because he’d had to and now he was deeply sad that it was time to leave. He felt like he’d walked into the place kicking and screaming and he was leaving the same way.
He glanced back at the bar. He wouldn’t see her working there anymore. He wouldn’t glance over and see her standing there again.
At least he had a decent relationship with Ashley. She’d kept him up to date on Jillian’s progress. She was doing well and would be back at work on Friday. He would be looking for another job. He had a decent amount of money, but he knew damn well it wouldn’t last forever, and now he was planning on paying for Ashley’s school.
It was the only thing that made him feel good. He could help Jillian’s sister. It was a connection.
The lights were low on the stage. It was only left that way when someone was about to perform a serious scene. He hadn’t been given notice that a member was performing this evening. Alex and Eve performed scenes often, as did Liam and Avery. Sean and Grace practiced more privately, as did Jake, Serena, and Adam since she’d gotten pregnant. And that Brit didn’t need a stage. He was tearing through Sanctum like a man on a mission to have as much sex as he possibly could.
So who the hell was sceneing? The last thing he needed was something to go wrong on his final night here.
“Are you ready?” Alex McKay walked up to him, followed by his sub, Eve St. James. McKay was dressed in leathers, pants and a vest and boots. The lovely Eve looked perfect in her corset, thong, and sky-high stilettos.
Ready to leave? No, but admitting it wouldn’t change a thing. “I’m not happy about it, but I’m ready.”
McKay glanced off to the stage. “Not happy? Really? Don’t let her know. I think she planned this out quite carefully.”
“Definitely don’t let her know,” Eve said, staring at the stage. “She’s been out of the lifestyle for so long. The last thing she would want is to find out her Dom isn’t happy with the scene she’s set out.”
“What?” Who the hell were they talking about?
Ian Taggart slapped his shoulder as he came up behind Ryan. “Church, your resignation is not accepted.”
Taggart had tried to talk him out of this once. “You can’t keep me here.”
His eyes trailed to the stage. “No. But I think she can.”
The lights went up and his heart almost stopped. Jillian was in slave position, on her knees, her head submissively down, knees spread wide. And she wasn’t wearing a stitch of clothing, nothing but her own gorgeous skin. Her hair shone in the spotlight, bringing out all the golds and reds in her brown locks. They brushed past her shoulders and curled against her breasts.
Just like that his cock stirred to life. Half the time he’d thought the damn thing was dead. In the last year, he hadn’t felt a stir of arousal except for the times he’d thought about her. Until she’d walked back into his office, he’d been a zombie, walking but not living, his heart and cock both dead things.
Oh, but she brought him back to life.
“Do you need another lecture on how sex works?” Taggart asked.
He was so past politeness with that man. He gave his boss his happy middle finger and stalked toward the stage over the laughter that followed. There was always laughter at Sanctum. There was laughter and a deep sense of belonging and maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t have to leave.
He took the steps to the big stage in one leap, so eager to get to her he couldn’t stand it. She was here and she was naked and submissive, and he couldn’t believe that didn’t mean what he thought it should mean.
“Jillian?”
Her head came up slightly, that devilish light he’d always loved in her eyes. “Yes, Master?”
“Baby, what’s going on here?” He wouldn’t believe until she just flat out said it.
“It’s been brought to my attention that perhaps our first contract was improperly worded. We needed something more to make it clear exactly what your sub needed.”
That contract had been fifteen pages long. He’d put everything he could possibly think of in it. He’d delineated every responsibility he could think of. “What did I leave out?”
McKay was suddenly beside him, holding out a piece of paper. “She’s had a contract prepared. I’ve never written one based strictly on a sub before. It’s quite brief, but if you sign it, you get full rights to her tonight and every night from now on. She’s signed one with the exact same requirements.”
He looked down at the contract Jillian had made out. It was a very simple document.
The Dominant will love the submissive forever. The Dominant will never leave the submissive. The Dominant will share life’s bounty and its sadness with the submissive. The Dominant will hold on to the submissive and gain comfort and love from her and only her.
The words swam in front of his eyes because this wasn’t really a contract, or rather it wasn’t just a D/s contract. “These sound like marriage vows, Jillian.”
“Yes. They do.”
“I’ll expect you to we
ar my ring then.” And his collar. That went without saying.
“I’ll expect you to stand in front of a preacher with me.”
God, he loved that bratty tone. He’d been wrong. So fucking wrong. He reached down and put his fingers under her chin, tilting her head up to meet his eyes. “I wish I could go back. I stole those years from us. It was ours, this struggle I’ve been through. It belonged to you as well as me because this is our life. I promise you, from this moment on, I will share every single second with you. I will share every moment of joy and every single heartache, and the joy will be greater and the heartache less because you’re here with me.”
“I stole that time from us too, Ryan. I love you. Forgive me.”
He placed his hand on her head, loving the silky feel of her hair beneath his. “Always.”
“Ahem.”
Damn. He’d forgotten that McKay and Taggart would want that damn contract before they did anything on Sanctum’s stage. It was the easiest contract he’d ever signed. He scrawled his name on the bottom line because he was ready to get to the good stuff.
He leaned over and brushed his lips against hers. His life settled back into place. He’d thought losing his business had been the thing that set him off course, but that had been a wrong turn. She was the destination, the only thing that mattered. Success was something a real man defined for himself, and seeing her waiting for him made him the most successful man he knew.
“Lean forward, baby. It’s a count of twenty.” He couldn’t miss her smile as she moved gracefully into position, that gorgeous ass in the air. He’d missed this so much, the deep connection he’d only felt with her. He let his hand caress her, adoring her every curve, his cock pulsing in his leathers. He ran his hands everywhere, inspecting her, staring at her pussy and her ass. He let his fingers drift to her pussy, already silky and wet. The scent of her arousal could drive him mad. “Who does this belong to?”
No hesitation from his girl. “It belongs to my Master. Everything I have belongs to him and no one else.” She could be such a good girl when she wanted to, and so sweetly bad as well. “Who does your cock belong to?”
He smacked her ass because that belonged to him too. “Watch your tone, baby.” But he was smiling as he said it. “And it belongs to you. Only you. It hasn’t touched another woman since the day I laid eyes on you.”
He started his discipline, secure in the knowledge that Jillian loved this. She loved the play, the spanking, the teasing, the torture. She counted out his every smack in a breathy voice that let him know she was losing herself in the play. Over and over he smacked that gorgeous ass. Her skin flushed a lovely pink, and he could see her pussy glistening and preparing itself for his cock.
Her head dropped forward as they reached seventeen and she moaned a little between spanks, but she hadn’t forgotten any of her training. She remained spread wide for her Dom, her ass only swaying slightly as she bore his discipline.
When he was done, he let his fingers find their way to her pussy. So fucking ripe. So ready. His fingers slid easily through her labial lips, parting them and teasing their way into her pussy. A little gasp puffed out of her mouth.
“Tell me something, Jillian. How lonely have you been since we’ve been apart?” He knew the answer to the question. Ashley had told him she’d been a nun since she’d returned home, but he wanted to hear the words.
Her spine shivered as the pad of his thumb found her clit. “Well, I didn’t fuck Keith if that’s what you’re asking.”
He couldn’t help it. He laughed. Damn. He’d missed laughing. “You are going to pay for that smart mouth, baby. But tonight I’m giving you a pass because I need you too much. Tomorrow is another story entirely. Tomorrow I’m going to plug that sweet asshole of yours. Whether or not I get out the ginger lube is up to you.”
“Please.” Suddenly her voice was all sweetness and light. “Please, Master.”
She knew just how to get to him. When she pleaded sweetly, his cock lengthened to new proportions. “Yes, you will please your Master. I’m going to fuck your ass, baby. I’m going to split you wide and remind you whose submissive you are. I’m going to lube up my cock and sink it so deep into your ass that you won’t remember a time I wasn’t inside you. And just when you think you’ll scream and beg me to stop, that’s when I’ll play with this jewel.”
He pinched at her clit, his fingers deep inside her pussy, rubbing that spot he knew always made her crazy.
“Master!”
Her cunt was clenching all around his fingers. So tight. So hot. “You’ll beg me to fuck your ass, won’t you, love?”
“Yes, Master. I will beg you to fuck my ass.”
She could be as bratty as she liked as long as it brought them here. Why had he ever been afraid of her walking away? She was so much stronger than he’d given her credit for. She was a rock, and he needed her in so many ways he couldn’t count them. “Come for me, baby. Come for your Master.”
He pushed down on her clit, his thumb working in tight circles as he fucked his fingers high into her cunt. She came on a keening cry, the sound food for his soul. He might not always be able to give her everything she wanted, but he could give her this. He could give her everything he had, every piece of his soul.
He held his hand tight against her until the shuddering waves died down. When he pulled his hand out, he brought it to his mouth, sucking off all of her sweet cream. God, he’d missed the way she tasted. He never would again. He would have his mouth on her at least once a day for the rest of their lives.
He got to his feet because he couldn’t wait any longer. He hadn’t been inside her for so long, and he damn straight wasn’t going to do it with an audience. He lifted her up, moving her languid body until she was securely in his arms. He stared down at those beautiful eyes, heavily lidded and sleepy with satisfaction. “Time to find someplace private, baby.”
“Hey, I was promised a show!” Taggart yelled.
Yeah, he did not need the peanut gallery for this moment. “Another night, Taggart.”
“Then you’ll be back?” There was a smug look on the bastard’s face, as though a plan had just come together, and he loved it when that happened. All the fucker needed was a cigar hanging out of his mouth to complete the picture of satisfaction.
“I’ll expect a raise.” He wasn’t going to let Taggart get by with nothing.
“He’s got a wife now,” Jillian said with a smile on her face.
“You two suck,” Taggart shouted, but everyone around him was laughing.
“Don’t let him sway you for less than fifteen percent. I happen to know he really wants you to stay.” Her arms drifted around his neck as he walked toward the privacy rooms.
How had he ever been so stupid to let her go? She was the perfect partner.
* * * *
Jillian felt like she was floating as Ryan pushed through the door of one of Sanctum’s three privacy rooms. Finally, after all those months of being alone, she was complete again. And it was better this time because all the cards were on the table.
He settled her on the big bed and took a step back. “God, you’re beautiful.”
She was too big. She could lose ten or fifteen pounds. Her ass was too wide and her boobs sagged, and when he looked at her like that, she felt like Miss Universe. “You make me feel beautiful.”
He made her feel, period. She’d been dead inside for months, but everything was coming back to her now.
“I love you, Jillian.” He shrugged out of his leather vest, completely revealing his perfectly cut chest.
“I love you, Ryan.” Why hadn’t she just said it before? “I won’t let you push me away again.” She would fight for this marriage.
“I won’t, baby. Not now that I realize just how fucking much I need you. I’ve been miserable without you.”
She needed to make something clear. “If you want to build another business, I’ll help you.”
He shook his head. “I want to build a f
amily now.” He untied his leathers. “I can make plenty of money as an idea man, and I think I’m about to get a raise here. I still have a little in the bank. I can take care of us, and my lovely bride is a hell of a bar manager. Let’s make this place great. Let’s build a home.”
Sweet tears pierced her eyes. A home. A family. That was a future worth fighting for. “Yes, my Master.”
Her husband.
He shoved his leathers off his hips, and she nearly growled in satisfaction. He was so beautiful. No other man could compare. He was perfectly formed, with lean muscles and broad shoulders, strong arms and long legs. And his cock. That was a thing of beauty. Ryan’s cock thrust from a perfectly trimmed nest of dark hair. Thick and long with a plum-shaped head, his cock had her heart racing again.
“Are you sure you’re all right?” His eyes went to the scar on the left side of her abdomen.
She ran a hand there. How odd was it that getting in the middle of a couple disintegrating had been the thing that finally brought her around? Passion could be good or it could be very bad. Love, like everything else in the universe, was what a person made of it, and Jillian intended to make hers work this time around. They had been given a second chance. She wasn’t going to wait to take it. “I’m perfectly fine except for the fact that my Master isn’t inside me yet.”
“Oh, baby, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted to hear those words.” He leaned down and kissed her, his tongue plunging deep.
Jill let every worry and stress melt away. She didn’t need to be anxious here. This was a safe place, a space for her and Ryan to become the whole world.
He kissed her lips and her nose, her cheeks and ears. He moved across her skin, leaving no part of her lonely, worshipping every inch of her. She let her hands drift to his silky hair, running her fingers through it as he licked her nipples. A slow fire built inside her. He’d been a tricky man, giving her the first orgasm so he could take his time with this one.
He sucked a nipple into his mouth, his tongue heating her skin. His free hand played with her other breast, fingers pinching down, twisting the ring there. She loved it when he played hard. He squeezed her nipple with his fingers and then bit down on the other lightly with his teeth. She couldn’t stop the moan that came from her throat.