“It’s okay, I guess,” she said, shrugging. “There’s more closet space, which is always a good thing.”
Macy was one of the happiest, most upbeat people I knew. I’d never heard her sound so… flat.
“Is everything okay with you and Brendan?” I asked, leaning forward to grip her knee. “Is that the real reason you’re here, honey? Are you guys having problems?”
She sighed. “You know how it is when you’ve been with a guy for a long time, sis. It just gets harder and harder to keep the spark alive.”
That had never been a problem with Brody. Heat had always simmered beneath the surface when we were in the same room. Our problems ran much deeper than lack of physical chemistry. “Have you tried talking to him about it?”
“I have,” she said, sounding frustrated. “And he tells me that I expect too much. I don’t know, maybe he’s right.”
“Mace, you should never feel as though you’re settling. If you’re not happy with him anymore—”
“It’s not that easy,” she said, running a hand through her long, wavy hair. “We work together. Without him as a partner and collaborator, I’m not sure what would happen to my career.”
Macy was one of the most talented people I knew. Not only did she have an amazing voice, but she wrote beautiful music and played several instruments. They’d been supporting themselves by selling their songs since moving to Nashville. Several had been recorded by top country music artists and topped the charts, paying them a tidy residual.
“You can do anything you set your mind to,” I reminded her. “If it comes down to it, you’ll pursue your dream on your own. I know you love Brendan. He’s been a part of your life for the past six years. But don’t think for a second that you couldn’t do it without him.”
“He doesn’t think I could,” she said, her bright blue eyes brimming with emotion. “And I don’t know. Maybe he’s right. Maybe I couldn’t do it without him, sis. He’s the one who motivates me, ya know?”
I couldn’t deny that Macy hadn’t always been the most self-motivated person. She’d dropped out of college after a year, claiming she didn’t need a degree to be a musician and didn’t want to waste any more of our parents’ money.
“But if you want it badly enough, you’ll be motivated to carry on without him. Come on, I watched you teach yourself how to play guitar at thirteen. It took you months, but you got the hang of it. You didn’t give up, because you were hooked. Music is a part of you.”
“It is,” she said, shaking her head slowly. “But the grind is starting to get to me. Playing a different bar or club every night. Going out on the road with other bands, trying to make a name for ourselves. Some days it feels like we’re making headway, but other days it feels like we’re just spinning our wheels.”
I could relate. Starting my own business had been one of the hardest things I’d ever done. It took me at least two years before I gained traction and turned a decent profit. But I didn’t give up on my dream, and I couldn’t imagine my sister wasting her talent either.
“Maybe you just need a little break,” I suggested. “From Brendan and from music. Have you thought about coming home for a couple of months?”
“It’s not that easy,” she said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “We have a lease, and Brendan can’t or won’t do gigs without me. Besides, we both rely on the income from those gigs to survive.”
Their lives really were inextricably linked, even more so than those of some married couples, and I couldn’t help but wonder whether Macy was only staying with him because she felt trapped. “You could both still write music, even if you’re apart for a while, right? Selling a couple of songs might give you some breathing room.”
“Song writing has always been a collaborative effort for us. I can’t imagine doing it without him.”
I frowned, disturbed that my strong sister, who’d always had a stubborn streak, now seemed to believe she was dependent upon a man to do something that had once come so naturally to her. “You haven’t always had Brendan in your life, Mace. You wrote songs before you met him.”
“Yeah, but I never sold any of them. They weren’t good enough.”
“Who told you they weren’t good enough? I’ve heard them. They were amazing!”
Why was she selling herself short? Who’d given her the impression she wasn’t good enough? Brendan? If it was him, I’d be on the next plane to Nashville to knock some sense into him. No one treated my baby sister that way!
“Enough about me,” she said, hiding her face in her hands as she shook her head furiously. “I’m sick to death of my problems. Tell me what’s going on with you. Have you heard from Stephan since you broke up?”
“Please, I don’t want to talk about him any more than you want to talk about Brendan.”
“Okay, how about Brody? Has he come to his senses yet?”
“As a matter of fact, there is some news on that front.” It was impossible to keep anything from Macy. She would have known I was trying to hide something if I didn’t spill my guts. “He showed up at my place last night.”
Macy clapped her hand over her mouth as she stared at me, wide-eyed. “Shut. Up! Did you sleep with him?”
“No, of course not.” Not that I wasn’t tempted. “We just talked.” And kissed a little. Including one scorching good-bye kiss that left me wondering whether he’d be waiting for me to get home so we could pick up where we’d left off. He hadn’t said whether he had to head back to Vegas, and I’d been afraid to ask. I didn’t want to make it seem as though we were settling back into a relationship where we owed it to each other to check in and clear our plans with each other.
“About your relationship?”
“No, about his dad.” I didn’t think Brody would mind if I confided in my sister. He always turned to his brothers when he needed advice, and he knew my sister and I did the same. “Apparently Jack came to see him in Vegas, and Brody was having a hard time dealing with it. He needed someone to talk to, and I tried to be there for him. End of story.”
Macy raised a brow. “Nothing with you and Brody is ever that cut and dried.”
“Well, this time it was,” I said, shrugging. “I know him better than anyone, aside from his family, and he wasn’t ready to talk to them about this. He’s not sure they’d want to know he talked to their father, so he thought he should get an unbiased opinion.”
“You do know how weird it is for a guy to turn to his ex-girlfriend when he needs support, don’t you?”
“It’s not like I invited him to call me if he needed to talk. But I couldn’t very well turn him away when he turned up at my door in the middle of the night.”
Gaping at me, Macy asked, “He showed up in the middle of the night?”
“Uh, yeah. Didn’t I mention that part?” I asked, picking an imaginary piece of lint off my straight black skirt.
“No, you didn’t,” she said, looking amused. “So let me get this straight. He shows up at your door in the middle of the night. He’s vulnerable and confused. You’re both single and still hot for each other, and nothing happened?”
I diverted my eyes to the bank of windows lining the south wall of my office. I should have known better than to think I could keep anything from her. “We may have kissed… a few times,” I said, barely loud enough for her to hear.
“Ah ha, I knew it,” Macy said, clapping once. “I knew you couldn’t be alone with him without something happening.”
“That’s not true,” I said, suddenly defensive. I didn’t appreciate my sister’s assumption that I had no self-control with Brody… even if there was a grain of truth to that. “We were in Colorado for five whole days for Jaci and Nex’s wedding and nothing happened.”
“Only because you had a boyfriend. Can you honestly tell me if Stephan wasn’t a factor, you wouldn’t have slept with him?”
I’d asked myself that question dozens of times and still didn’t have the answer. “I don’t know. I just know I’m
glad nothing happened. It would only have confused me more.”
Macy leaned forward, looking concerned. “Hey, what’s wrong? Aren’t you happy that Brody’s back in your life?”
“I’m not sure how I feel. Just when I think I’m getting over him, I’m forced to confront my feelings in Colorado and realize I’m not really over him at all. So I break up with Stephan and think I just need to give myself a little more time to get over Brody. Then he shows up on my doorstep out of the blue, after I haven’t seen or heard from him in months, and sends me into another tailspin. It’s so frustrating!”
The phone on my desk rang, and Macy glanced at it before she said, “How about we finish this conversation over dinner tonight? Chinese food at your place?”
“Uh, Brody might still be there,” I said, crossing to my desk. I picked up the phone, and asked my assistant to hold the call for a minute.
“What do you mean he might be there? You don’t know for sure?”
“No, I didn’t want to ask what his plans might be, so I just kind of left it up to him.”
Macy narrowed her eyes, looking annoyed as she reached for her purse. “No worries, we can eat somewhere else. I’ll call you later.”
***
Brody
I was sitting on Riley’s couch, eating a bag of potato chips and watching an action flick, when my favorite little hellion stormed in, looking as if she were ready to wage war. I’d known Macy since she was a little girl, and I still saw her as the cute little thing with a button nose who’d cried her eyes out when I cruelly told her Santa wasn’t real.
“Hey, girlie. What’re you doing here?”
She fisted her hand on her hip, spitting fire with those blazing blue eyes that made tough guys weak in the knees. “What am I doing here? What the hell are you doing here?”
I pointed at the TV. “Watching a movie. Having a snack.” I held out the bag of sour cream and onion chips. “Want one?”
“No, I don’t want one,” she said, slapping the bag away.
I shrugged and grabbed another handful before setting the bag on the coffee table.
“What I want is an explanation.”
“About?” I crunched away, then she grabbed the remote and turned off the TV. “Hey, it was just getting to the good part!”
“If you don’t pay attention, you’re going to be a headline on the six o’clock news tonight because I’m going to push you off the balcony.”
I chuckled at the threat. Macy was about five feet tall and a hundred pounds. I didn’t think she could throw her twenty-pound cat off the balcony, much less a two-hundred-twenty pound guy.
“You think this is funny?” she demanded, tapping her little foot against the polished hardwood floor.
“No,” I said, trying to keep a straight face. “Not at all.” I leaned forward, propping my elbow on my knees as I debated whether she’d go ballistic if I made a grab for the chip bag. “Tell me what’s got you so bent out of shape.”
“The way you’re treating my sister, for starters.”
Okay, that got my attention. “What’s that supposed to mean? I haven’t done anything to Riley.”
“You mean aside from breaking her heart?”
I’d beaten myself up about that enough already, but Macy had every right to get her shots in too. She loved Riley and wanted to protect her. I’d have reacted the same way if I thought someone was playing one of my brothers.
“Okay,” I said, brushing chip crumbs off my jeans. “Let me have it. Take your best shot.”
“Why are you here?” she asked, her voice deadly quiet. “You guys broke up. So what makes you think you have the right to run to her every time you have a problem?”
“I don’t run to her every time I have a problem. Just this time.” It wasn’t the first time I’d wanted to reach out to her since Colorado. I’d been fighting the urge every damn day. But something about seeing the old man had driven me right back into her arms.
“How long are you staying?” she asked, perching on the end of a chair.
“I don’t know. I have another event in a couple of days.” For the first time in my life, I wasn’t itching to get back out on the road. Being here, surrounded by Riley’s things- her scent, her favorite clothes, and my memories- made me more content than I’d been in a long time.
“Don’t you know what it does to her when you breeze in and out of her life like this?” Macy asked, dropping her purse behind her on the chair. “It kills her. It’s not fair for you to keep jerking her around like this, Brody. For once, think about someone other than yourself!”
I covered my face with my hands, not because I was ashamed of my actions, though I was, but because I couldn’t stand to hear the truth.
Macy inched down on the chair and covered my knee with her hand. “You know I don’t hate you. I could never hate you. You were like family to me. But I saw how hard it was for my sister to break up with you, to come to terms with the fact that you two would never have the happy ending she’d always wanted.”
“You don’t think I wanted to give her that?” I looked Macy in the eye, pleading with her to understand. “You don’t think I tried? Believe me, I did.”
“Fine, maybe you did,” she said, leaning back in the chair. “Let’s say I believe you. The fact is, you came to terms with the fact you couldn’t. So did my sister. So again I’ll ask: why are you back in her life, Brody? Has something changed? Have you changed?”
Macy had never been afraid to ask the tough questions, especially when she was going to bat for someone she loved. “Honestly? I don’t know if I’ve changed. The only thing I can say for sure is that living without your sister has been…” No words could describe how empty I’d felt since she broke up with me. “It’s been hell.”
“I don’t understand you,” she said, shaking her head. “What do you want out of life?”
There was a time when I’d thought the big house, designer clothes, and fancy cars would make me happy. Now that I’d had all that, I knew it was just a Band-Aid solution. Those things had made me feel better for a while, but eventually the pain seeped in again.
“I’ve been asking myself that question for a long time,” I said, trying to be honest with her. “And I still don’t have the answer.”
“Don’t you think you should have figured that out before you showed up on my sister’s doorstep?” She blew her side-swept blond bangs out of her eyes.
“Yeah, I probably should have. But last night, I wasn’t thinking clearly. I was just acting on impulse.”
“Yeah, and who do you think is going to have to deal with the fallout once you’re gone again?”
“Riley.” Macy was right. I was a selfish bastard who didn’t deserve her sister. “I’ll talk to her. I’ll try to make her understand.”
“Understand what?” she asked, fisting her hand on the arm of the chair. “How the hell can you make her understand what you’re thinking and feeling when you don’t even understand it?”
Blowing out a frustrated breath, I said, “Look, Mace, I know you’re pissed at me. I get that. You have every reason to be, but what happens between me and your sister is our business. Not yours.”
“Really?” She clenched her jaw as she leaned over the arm of the chair. “Who the hell do you think took her calls in the middle of the night when she was crying her eyes out over you? Who do you think flew in to take care of her after she finally found the courage to break up with you?” Narrowing her eyes, she stabbed her chest with her thumb. “I did. I made sure she ate and slept, and I listened when she wanted to talk. I held her when she felt like crying. I helped her go through your things and ship them to you. I helped her box up all of the mementos from your relationship and put them in storage. So don’t you dare tell me I don’t have a right to be concerned. This does affect me!”
“Fine, point taken,” I said, raising my hands in supplication. “But you can rest assured I’m not here to hurt her. I love her. I’ve never stopped loving he
r.”
“But your brand of love isn’t what she needs. Can’t you see that?” she cried desperately. “She needs a man she can depend on. She needs a friend and a lover, someone who wants the kind of future she does.”
“I know that.”
After a long pause, she said, “Riley said you saw your father last night; that’s why you needed someone to talk to.”
“Yeah.”
“I know it’s none of my business,” she said, sounding wary, “but whether you believe it or not, I do still care about you.”
I chuckled, giving her a sidelong look. “Really? You have a funny way of showing it.”
“Shut up and listen to me,” she said, crossing her arms.
“Fine, say your piece.” I glanced at my Rolex. “My brother’s going to be here in a few though.”
“Which one?” she asked, sitting up a little straighter.
“Kane.”
She bit her lip. “Really? How’s he been?”
“Fine. You were saying something about—”
“Right,” she said, shaking her head as though to clear it. “If you have a chance to make things right with your dad, maybe you should.”
I glared at her. “You’re right. It’s none of your business.”
“I don’t care,” she said, raising her chin. “You can get pissed at me if you want to, but I’m going to say what’s on my mind, whether you like it or not.”
Since I was in her sister’s apartment, I couldn’t very well kick her out, nor could I leave with Kane already on his way. “Fine. What do you know about my issues with my old man?”
“Just what you’ve told me.”
Given all the years I’d been with her sister, Macy and I had discussed my parents several times—my mother more than my excuse for a father—so she knew the gist of the story. “And?”
“I can’t help but wonder whether you’re having trouble committing to my sister because of your issues with your father?”
“What do you mean?” Damn, she was hitting too close to home.
“Maybe you think you’ll be the kind of husband and father he was, and it scares you.” Her voice softened when she said, “I get it. You had a lousy example growing up, but you’ve also had a good example. Look at Mac and Ryker. I know they hit a rough patch a while back, but Riley says they’re back together and happier than ever.”
Brody Page 3