by Sky Corgan
Ryan loved working with his hands. The sandpaper beneath his palm, the sweat rolling down his back and chest, the smell of wood and hay from being inside the barn reminded him of simpler times. Times so long ago they seemed like a dream.
This wasn’t his life. Not really. But working on the ranches and farms he’d visited these past few months helped him to forget, if only for a little while. He had needed the space. If anyone besides his brother knew what he had done, he would have been followed, as he always was wherever he went, whether it be to the grocery store or a movie premiere. The paparazzi were there.
But not here. Not out in the middle of nowhere. Out in the middle of a little town, down a country road, on a secluded ranch. They wouldn’t find him here, and he was glad.
As he worked on the barn, he was so lost in thought that he hadn’t heard the woman walking up behind him. It was a stupid mistake. She could have just as easily been coming to kill him. After all, he did have enemies. Who didn’t when they were as well-known as he was?
Ana wasn’t a hit man, but when Ryan turned and laid eyes on her, it was like a shot straight through his chest. His heart stopped beating. She stole his breath and erased everything he thought he knew about himself. In that one moment, all that was clear to Ryan was that he had met the woman he was going to marry, and that life would never be the same again.
He would have kissed her right there if she would have let him. She looked at him like he was a stranger, because he was, though he could sense the desire behind her eyes as well. She found him attractive, but she was afraid of that. Ryan had been around enough women to know that look. She had been hurt, and recently.
As he helped her up, he glanced at her left hand to make sure there was no wedding ring. If there had been, he might have been heartbroken right on the spot. Luck was on his side, though, and her slender fingers were bare. But then he noticed the slight swell of her belly. Maybe luck wasn’t on his side after all. There was no way of knowing without speaking to her further, and she seemed so rattled that she just wanted to escape.
Ryan watched Ana’s backside as she walked away from him, enjoying the sway of her hips. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. The way his body and soul yearned for her to come back, it was something he’d never experienced before. In all his years around the gorgeous, sophisticated women of the big city, not one had ever inspired such a longing in him as Ana did now.
That was why he was more than delighted to see her the next morning at the breakfast table, even though she looked glassy-eyed and half-asleep. He offered a shy smile across the table as he buttered one of Molly’s homemade biscuits.
Did you sleep well last night?” he asked, trying not to make his interest obvious.
Fine. You’re awfully bright eyed and bushy tailed.” Ana avoided Ryan’s gaze as she took a long sip of coffee—black and hot.
It’s early to bed, early to rise on the ranch, right, Molly?”
Ana’s mother was still scurrying around, making sure everyone had everything they needed before she sat to serve herself.
Every day, Sunshine.” Molly beamed at him.
Sunshine?” Ana couldn’t hide the sarcasm.
When I first laid eyes on him, the first thing I noticed was the way the sun reflected from his hair.”
So refresh my memory, Sunshine, where are you from and what are you doing here? I was a bit tired last night when we spoke,” Ana said.
It felt more like an interrogation, but Ryan could understand her concern. Ana must worry for her mother and sister.
Well.” He shifted in his chair, replaying his story in his head. He had recited it at least a dozen times, but it hadn’t felt wrong like it did now. If he planned to marry Ana someday, then it was better to be honest, but her mother and sister had already heard one story. He would seem untrustworthy if he gave her a different one, and he didn’t want to be sent packing. Ryan decided to be vague. “I decided to take a year to live my life differently. Traveling around the country like this has always been a dream of mine. I figured there’s no time like the present. And I’ve been enjoying it so far. I’ve been able to meet a lot of wonderful people and do a lot of work that feels worthwhile.”
And all for the price of some pot roast.” Molly let out a short laugh.
Ryan is from Pittsburgh,” Celia answered the question Ryan was trying to avoid. He was not, in fact, from Pittsburgh.
Pittsburgh.” Ana nodded. “And what did you do in Pittsburgh that allowed you to take time off to do something like this?”
She didn’t think he had a job, a home, or a family. None of that could be further from the truth.
I do a bit of everything.” Ryan cast a glance in Ana’s direction, and when their eyes met, her cheeks flushed the softest shade of pink. It wasn’t the answer she wanted, but it was enough. She wasn’t going to press for more. Not yet, at least. If they got as close as he wanted to, he would have to explain the truth to her later.
We need to go dress shopping today.” Celia was sitting across from Molly, looking lost in thought. It was obvious she had a lot on her mind with the wedding so close at hand.
Of course.” Ana pulled her eyes away from Ryan, opting to stare at her eggs and bacon and hash browns instead. Molly always made a feast for breakfast, insisting it was the most important meal of the day.
I saw a dress in one of the little boutiques downtown that I thought would be lovely on you.” Celia smiled.
I look forward to seeing it.”
Well, I suppose I should get back to work. Those fence posts won’t replace themselves.” Ryan wiped his mouth with a napkin and stood, excusing himself from the table. He didn’t want Molly to think he was taking advantage of her hospitality. He had come here to do a job.
Would you like to take some biscuits for later?” Molly held the plate of biscuits up.
No, ma’am. If I have too many more of those, you’ll be finding me sleeping under that big oak tree out back instead of working.”
You’re so skinny, I feel like I need to fatten you up.” Her eyes drifted down the front of his flannel. Ever since he first arrived, she’d been nothing but kind. The world needed more women like Molly White. Her husband had been a lucky man when he was alive.
I’m sure I’ll have gained a few pounds by the time I leave here.” Ryan smoothed down the front of his shirt, letting out a short laugh. His eyes strayed to Ana, who was staring at him, or, rather, through him. He couldn’t help but wonder what she was thinking.
Well, I’ll see you ladies later.” He tipped his baseball cap to them before heading out the door, taking thoughts of Ana with him.
CHAPTER TWO
Dark clouds hung overhead, threatening to break into a torrential downpour. This was not a great day for dress shopping, especially on the little strip mall downtown where parking was so sparse—and on a weekend when the stores were all crowded, no less.
As Ana stared up at the sky, she wondered if this was an omen. In New York, she’d thought she was going to have it all. Now she had nothing.
Looking at dresses with her sister didn’t make her feel any better. While she was happy for Celia, she couldn’t help but think that this was how her life was supposed to have been. She was the older sister, after all. She should have an amazing husband and a good career by now. Instead, she was unemployed and pregnant with the child of a man who treated her like the dirt stuck to the bottom of his shoes.
That was the last thing she remembered of Rick Fasken. Disdain.
Her heart still ached when she thought about it. If she could turn back time and erase her attraction to him, maybe this never would have happened. Maybe he would have given her that promotion after all, and she would have remained in New York, happily working at Fasken Law Firm forever.
That wasn’t what had happened, though. After nearly five years, Rick Fasken had begun noticing her in a way he’d never noticed her before. He’d wooed her like no man ever had, wined her and dined her, taken her on ama
zing dates. How could she not give herself to him over and over again?
She’d been so caught up in their whirlwind romance that she hadn’t realized it wasn’t real. In the three months that Rick had courted her, not once had he invited her to meet his family. Not once had they gone out with friends, neither his nor hers. Rarely were they seen outside of work together, and when they were, he made sure they looked platonic. Because that was what they really were—friends with benefits. And the “friends” part had melted away when she’d told him she was pregnant.
That was in her past. She could never go back, not to that place, to that job, to the person she was. In six more months, she’d be a mother, and as much as that thought made her heart skip with joy, it terrified her in equal measure.
As Ana slipped the pink strapless chiffon bridesmaid dress over her head, she tried to picture her future, sitting on the front porch of her mother’s home with a baby on her knee. While her mother would love and care for them with everything she had, that wasn’t how it was supposed to be. A child needed a father.
Her mind flitted back to Ryan during breakfast. He was every bit as handsome as she remembered from the night before, and her hormones had gone haywire the moment that she set eyes on him, despite the fact she wasn’t fully awake. It was still a bit upsetting that a stranger had taken up residence at her childhood home, but he seemed genuine, and her mother adored him.
Ana smoothed the front of the dress, trying to focus. Unlike the other bridesmaids’ dresses, this one was long and flowing with a slit up the left side. Her mother had made the other dresses, and there was no time to make a final one the night before the wedding. Something store-bought would have to do, and this dress was as close to the color of the other ones as they could find.
I like it,” Celia decided, eyeing the dress up and down.
Me too.” It hid Ana’s baby bump perfectly.
After taking off the dress, they went to find a pair of matching shoes and then returned home. Ana spent most of her day in her room playing games on her laptop and rummaging through her closet for her old knitting supplies.
Ana’s mother had always been big on making their clothes when she was growing up. Now it seemed like more of a hassle than it was worth, but at least this gave her something to do, and she didn’t want to dip into what little savings she had left.
Ana pulled her desk chair over by the window and grabbed a spool of lavender yarn—a nice gender-neutral color—to start working on a small scarf. Not that her child would ever need it in the Texas heat, but it was a good thing to practice on, since she hadn’t knitted anything in at least seven years. While she began to cast her stitches onto her long knitting needle, she stared out the window overlooking her parents’ ranch. Not so much staring as looking for Ryan.
She could barely see him working to replace one of the fence posts at the far side of her viewing reach. The ranch itself extended for some six hundred acres, so it was only luck that put Ryan in her line of sight. The land itself used to be divided between ranch and farmland, but once Ana’s father died, her mother had found it much easier to buy more cattle and convert it all into a ranch.
Ana stared longingly at the stranger. The flannel he was wearing earlier was now wrapped around his waist, and the beads of sweat on his back glistened in the sunlight. She could see what her mother had said about his hair. Maybe the name Sunshine did suit him. She just wished he would turn around so she could see the defined muscles of his broad chest. He worked hard, and it showed in the definition of his back, in the tan of his skin.
Ana shouldn’t be looking at him. Not only did it feel like spying, she had no business fantasizing about anyone. This was what had gotten her into trouble in the first place, wanting someone she knew better than to have. Rick had been above her station. Ryan was just passing through. He’d be gone like leaves on the breeze within another week. A distant memory. A vagabond. Not someone she needed to get involved with.
Ana tried to pay little mind to Ryan as they took their afternoon meal together. Thanks to shopping with Celia, she’d missed lunch with him. That was probably for the best. The less time they were in each other’s presence, the less she would want him.
It’s going to be a big day tomorrow,” Molly said with a sigh.
I know.” Celia picked at her chicken.
My little girl is all grown up.” Molly fought back the tears coming to her eyes. Ana tried not to feel too jealous. Maybe someday, she’d express the same sentiment at Ana’s wedding. “You’ll come to the wedding, won’t you?” Molly turned to Ryan, catching them all off guard.
I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” He beamed. “That is, if it’s all right with you.” He looked to Celia.
The more the merrier.”
Ana wasn’t sure how she felt about this. Why would he want to go to a wedding where he didn’t know anyone? Still, it would be kind of nice to see how Ryan cleaned up.
It was a horrible thing to think in the light of trying to resist him. Just because he was going to be there didn’t mean she’d have to pay attention to him. Besides, she’d be too busy with her maid-of-honor duties to even notice him.
She wasn’t far off the mark. The following day was spent running around. Ana, her mother, and the bridesmaids drove to the reception hall early that morning to begin decorating, setting up the centerpieces, and taping streamers to all the tables. It was going to be a simple country wedding, and that meant doing everything themselves. Ana had heard that weddings were stressful, but this was unreal, especially being dropped in at the last minute. Her mother seemed to have everything under control, directing her and the bridesmaids and making sure things ran smoothly.
Ana was so busy during the day that by the time she had to start getting dressed and help Celia get ready, she had forgotten Ryan even existed. It wasn’t until she was making her procession down the aisle that she caught a glimpse of him in the back pew. He looked so dapper in a classic black tux that she nearly stumbled over her own feet. Wow, he does clean up well, she thought as she continued down the aisle.
The ceremony was beautiful, and it called up emotions from the depths of Ana’s soul that were both endearing and melancholy. Celia was marrying her high-school sweetheart, David Wiseman. He was handsome, charming, a star quarterback for the football team when they were in high school, and now a prominent accountant in their small community. Shortly after proposing to Celia, they’d gone house hunting together so that he’d have a threshold to carry her over.
On top of snagging an amazing man, Celia had steadily been building her career since she graduated from high school. Even though she’d gone to college to be a veterinarian, she’d ended up as a dispatcher for the local police department and had soared up the ranks to lead dispatcher in no time, settling into a stable career with health insurance and all the other benefits. Her life was on the path that most girls dreamed of, while Ana’s was in shambles. How could Ana not be the tiniest bit jealous?
Watching her sister walk down the aisle in her immaculate white dress filled Ana with a yearning for things she feared she’d never have. Bandera was a small city, and most of the guys she’d known growing up had moved into San Antonio to seek out better employment opportunities. Everyone knew everyone in this town, and those she didn’t know, she’d meet soon enough. She hoped that there was still someone left for her, someone who could look past the fact that she was having a child out of wedlock.
Ana fought back tears as her little sister said her vows and became a married woman. From this point on, it would just be Ana and her mother living in the big ranch house together. It left her with a strange emptiness inside, and a sense of regret that she hadn’t come back sooner and spent more time with Celia as a single woman. What fun they could have had together.
With the wedding over, the guests removed themselves to the reception hall while Ana went up to the pulpit to have her picture taken with the bride and groom and the rest of the wedding party. It was a lengthy
process. Stand here. Move there. Hope her baby bump wasn’t showing. Wonder if she’d ever be skinny again. The women in her family were known for having issues taking off their baby weight. It was silly to think about, but what else was there to do when you were standing as still as a statue trying to force a smile for the cameras?
With that done, they made the short trek to the reception hall, which was conveniently located behind the church, and Celia and David broke off from everyone else to greet their guests and thank them for coming before it was time for the meal to be served.
Ana had just tied up a conversation with one of her cousins on her mother’s side when she turned around to find Ryan in her line of sight. He was standing with a glass of champagne in hand, talking to one of her uncles. It was strange to see him so at peace with her family, like he fit right in. She found herself staring at him, marveling at how handsome he looked. As if he could feel her eyes on him, he turned his head, catching her gaze. With a smile, he excused himself and crossed the distance between them, making her heart beat faster with every step.
You look beautiful, Ana. That dress suits you well.”
Ana’s cheeks heated up. “You’re not too bad yourself.”
Your family is wonderful.” He looked around the room, his eyes flitting over the faces of the people he’d just met, Ana’s entire family in one night. If she was in his place, she’d feel overwhelmed. Ryan seemed at ease with the crowd, though, as if being around so many strange people didn’t bother him one bit.
It’s been a busy day for you.”
And it’s not over yet.” There was still the toast, the dancing, the cake cutting, and the cleanup. She certainly couldn’t forget the cleanup. She’d be lucky if she was in bed before midnight.
Not a fan of weddings?” He smirked, bringing his glass up to his lips to take a sip of champagne. Ana’s eyes zeroed in on his mouth, thoughts of what it would be like to kiss him consuming her. Why did he have to be so attractive?