by Barb Han
“I’m sorry about your family being messed up, but being in the perfect one isn’t as easy as it looks. Everyone’s got problems,” Ryder snapped, needing to keep emotional distance between them. In truth, he loved his brothers. They were a close-knit bunch and about as perfect as a genuine family could be. Sure, they had issues from time to time, but they always managed to work out their differences. He and his twin brother, Joshua, were especially close. “And I’m done here.”
“I have to find him and I’m not giving up. It will put me in danger if I go alone but I don’t have a choice, Ryder. I have to do it,” she said, standing her ground yet again. The sound of his name rolling off her tongue had always stirred his chest in a way he couldn’t afford to allow. This time was no different. All his warning bells sounded.
“Sounds like you’re making a big mistake.” He shrugged. “Free country.”
“Do you really hate me that much?” she asked, and the desperation in her tone struck a chord. “You’d allow an innocent kid to be hurt just to prove a point?”
Now it was his turn to take in a sharp breath.
“No. But I can’t help you, either.” Maybe he could take a second to talk her out of being stupid. “If you’re really worried about this kid, call Tommy. The sheriff would be better at tracking down a missing teenager than me. Besides, you know the reality as much as I do. The kid’s most likely having fun with his friends. He’ll check in once he sobers up in a couple of days.”
“Tommy is friends with your family, not mine. He won’t help a McCabe and you know it,” she said defensively.
The chilly air goose-bumped her arms and Ryder had to stop himself from offering his jacket. Chivalry was ingrained in him, and he had to fight against his own cowboy code so that she wouldn’t think she was getting to him. Give her an inch and she’d stomp on him again with those fringed boots.
“Even so, he’s the law and he’ll help you,” Ryder said. “He took an oath, and he takes it seriously.”
“Braxton is a few counties over and out of his jurisdiction. That’s where Nicholas lives,” she said.
“Tommy can make a few calls, do a little digging. If it makes you feel better, I’ll ask him myself.” Ryder had no clue why he’d just volunteered himself like that. He’d have time to curse himself later. The sheriff in Braxton wasn’t exactly known for being cooperative.
An anguished sound tore from her throat. “That’s not good enough, and Tommy doesn’t care about Nicholas. I need answers now and I’m afraid something very bad has happened to him. I can’t afford to lose any more time, and someone follows me when I check on him.”
Didn’t that get all of Ryder’s neck hairs to stand on end?
“What makes you think so?” he asked.
“I drove to Nicholas’s house to check on him when he stopped responding to my texts three days ago and an SUV followed me to the county line.”
“Could’ve been random,” he said.
“I’ve been out there every night, and last night the SUV tapped my bumper,” she said, rubbing her arms as if the memory gave her chills instead of the cold night air.
Ryder didn’t like that. He’d take a minute to consider her position. He could concede that she’d had a point a few seconds ago. Tommy wasn’t likely to go above and beyond the call of duty for a McCabe. He’d arrested her brothers, who were immediately bailed out by the family lawyer too many times to have sympathy for any of them, even Faith.
Her concern for her half brother seemed genuine. Ryder could tell based on the desperation in her honey browns. If the situation were reversed and one of his brothers had gone missing, he’d do whatever it took to find him. All five of his siblings were grown now, and good men, but they’d gotten themselves into a few tricky situations as teenagers. Ryder could buy the idea that a good kid could get into trouble. He had a harder time swallowing the idea that a McCabe offspring could be anything but trouble. Bad was in their blood. He’d believed Faith to be different from her family, and look how that had worked out for him.
“How do you know he’s missing exactly?” he asked.
“We talk every day without fail. I was supposed to help him with geometry homework and he stood me up. He’s never done that. Ever.” Her wide eyes conveyed panic and worry. When he examined her features, he saw how tired and worried she looked.
“Have you spoken to his mother?” The teenager could have gotten himself in over his head or involved in drugs. Even so, none of this concerned Ryder, and Faith hadn’t given him one solid reason he should get involved. With her family’s money, she could hire an investigator.
“We’re not exactly on good terms and I have nothing to say to the woman,” Faith said, and her left shoulder shot up. He’d seen that move before. She was being indignant.
From his viewpoint, a quick phone call could most likely clear this whole thing up. If Faith was too stubborn to make that call she didn’t need to be reaching out to him to do her dirty work.
“Then I can’t help you. That was my only card. I’m folding. If you really believe he’s missing, then you should talk to someone in law enforcement. His mother might’ve reported his disappearance already.” He threw his hands up in surrender. As it was, he was having a difficult time keeping a wall between them and maintaining his neutral position. A woman in trouble wasn’t something he could normally turn his back on. He blamed his Texas upbringing and the fact that he’d had amazing parents.
“I’ll sweeten the pot,” she said quickly.
“You don’t have anything I want,” Ryder said, pushing thoughts of how soft her skin had been when he ran his finger along the curves of her stomach out of his mind. Or how much the sound of her laughter had temporarily suspended the pain of losing his parents.
“You want to know the real reason I walked away from you, Ryder O’Brien?” Now she was the one who was angry. He could see the fire in her eyes. Good. She’d get mad, spit out a few hostile words meant to offend him and then leave.
Problem solved.
“It doesn’t matter.” But his wounded pride said something else entirely—he wanted to know.
“You sure about that?” she asked in her one-last-chance tone.
“Have never been more certain of anything in my life.” If she wanted his help, making him angry was the wrong way to go about it. He didn’t like the idea of her putting herself in danger if that was the case, and he’d tried reasoning with her by telling her to bring in the law. If she didn’t have enough sense to stay out of harm’s way there wasn’t much he could do about it. “Why ask me to help in the first place? You had to know that I would refuse. You’re not exactly high on my list of people I want to see again.”
“You won’t turn me down. I know you and there’s something I’ve been keeping from you...” She paused long enough to put her hands on her belly. “Anything happens to me and your child goes with me. You’re going to be a father, Ryder. And that’s why I left you. If anyone found out this was your child, then my life, heck, your life, would be over.”
“Good one, Faith.” She wasn’t afraid to pull out all the stops on...
Hold on a damn minute. The look on her face slapped him with a new reality. Was she serious?
“That’s right, Ryder. I’m carrying your child.” Her lip quivered even though her words rolled off her tongue steady as steel.
She wasn’t lying?
He stood there for a long moment and stared at her, daring her to break the glaring contest and tell him she was joking. There was no way...
Was there?
A memory came back to him in a rush. He remembered one time when they’d been so lost and so into each other during their lovemaking neither had noticed that the condom he wore broke.
Okay, so it was possible. But that didn’t mean...
Ryder took a step towa
rd Faith to really look into her eyes.
“You’re pregnant?” he asked, knowing full well that he’d be able to tell if she faltered. She’d never been able to look him in the eyes and flat-out lie. Or at least that’s what he’d believed. How much did he get to know the real her in the few months they’d spent time together? She’d already shocked him once by walking out. And now she’d thrown him the last news he’d expected to hear from her.
“Yes,” she said plain as day.
“And the child is mine?”
“Yes,” she said with that same certainty.
She wasn’t lying.
“If that’s true—and I need a little time to come to terms with that fact—why are you telling me now?” he asked, trying to absorb that news. He couldn’t begin to process the idea of becoming a father, and he wasn’t immediately sure how he felt about it. All he knew was that his life was about to change forever. He’d seen firsthand the effects of the baby boom on the ranch with a few of his brothers.
“Like I said, I need your help and I’ll do whatever it takes to get it,” she said, her gaze a study in determination.
“Including lie about me fathering your child?” He’d thrown that question out to see if he could knock her off balance.
She stood her ground. “We both know I’m not.”
“Then I expect you to take care of yourself. Running straight into a fire doesn’t exactly fit that bill,” he said, and he meant every word. Until they sorted this mess out and knew for sure that she was, in fact, pregnant and he was the father of her child, he expected her to treat herself like a princess.
A thought struck. Was there any chance she could be so desperate for help that she’d bluff to get him to agree to help her?
Ryder studied her expression. If she was lying, she was a pro. Then again, he hadn’t seen their breakup coming, either. He’d need time to digest the possibility of being a father, especially considering all that he’d been through in the past few months. He forced his thoughts away from the fact that she’d been his sole comfort during the most difficult time of his life and their relationship had been about more than just the sex. It was saying a lot that they could be so into each other that a condom had broken and neither one realized until it was too late. Sex with Faith had been right up there with the best of his life. If he was being honest, it topped the list. Not something he cared to admit right now or dwell on too much. Even though the sex was great, there’d been so much more. He wasn’t normally one for a lot of words but holding her in their afterglow and doing just that—talking—had been even better than the sex. And that was saying a helluva lot.
“You know this qualifies as blackmail,” he said, his brain refusing to fully comprehend the news. He’d want a DNA test to be sure. And if the results proved his paternity, then he’d do what a man should—take care of his own.
“Does that mean you’ll help me?”
* * *
“GET IN. YOU’RE DAMN right we need to talk. Not here where everyone can see us,” Ryder said, opening the passenger door of his pickup and then walking around to the driver’s side without waiting for her to climb inside.
Faith almost backed out after seeing the hurt in his eyes after dropping the pregnancy bomb. She thought better of it. Yes, he was angry at her, but she’d realized that it was the only way to secure his help, and he was the only person she could trust right now.
All plans to find the perfect time to tell him about the pregnancy and have a civil conversation had flown out the window with her desperation. What she’d said was true, though. Her life would be over if her father found out she was carrying an O’Brien child.
“Don’t take me home or into town,” Faith said as she positioned herself in the seat of his dual-cab pickup and then buckled in. She hadn’t expected to play the pregnancy card with Ryder, but she was frantic. His shocked reaction braided her stomach lining.
Seeing him again had hurt like hell and she was still trying to regain her balance. He looked even better than she remembered with those sharp jet-black eyes and dark hair. He was six feet three inches of masculine muscle. And even angry, he was gorgeous. Walking away from him after finding out she was pregnant had nearly killed her, but she’d been his temporary shelter in a storm—a storm that was about to become a hurricane. Once the storm blew over and he regained his bearings he would’ve realized the same thing she had—a McCabe and an O’Brien didn’t stand a chance.
“What? Afraid to be seen with me?” he bit out. His voice poured over her, netting a physical reaction she couldn’t afford.
“Of course not.” She did her best to shake off his bitter tone. It was a temporary reaction to having his world rocked. He needed a minute to cool off so he could start thinking rationally again. It was a good sign that he wanted to talk. Deep down, he was a good man.
Besides, Faith could relate to the emotions that had to be zipping through him right now. The pregnancy wasn’t supposed to happen. The decisions she’d made after weren’t supposed to be part of her plans. And all that was predicated on the fact that she wasn’t supposed to fall for an O’Brien, let alone the renegade twin brother. And that was probably it. Her attraction was so strong because he was exciting and a breath of fresh air. Ryder had always been so alive, when she’d felt restricted for so many years living under her parents’ roof with three older brothers watching her every move. The family’s double standard that the boys could run buck wild and she had to practically be a nun had been suffocating.
Ryder represented danger and excitement, and her foolish heart had fallen hard for him when she’d seen him wandering around the lake, looking lost after news of his parents had made headlines. Everything about the O’Briens was news. Murder had been beyond scandal.
The next few months of their relationship had been insane and incredible. Secret rendezvous at his fishing cabin. Both of them escaping reality and getting lost in each other. Talking for hours into the night. She’d almost forgotten that he was an O’Brien and she was a McCabe until she’d overheard him on his cell phone with his brother, cursing her father, questioning whether he’d had anything to do with his parents’ murders.
She could understand his distrust of her father. The man was a shrewd businessman and even she could admit that he pushed the legal boundaries beyond their limits. Worse to her, the man was a philanderer, and she’d watched her mother fade over the years as she accepted his behavior even though he could be quite charming when he wanted to be. But murder?
Her father might have loose morals and no conscience when it came to business, but he wasn’t capable of killing anyone.
And then another blow had come when Ryder’s brother asked where Ryder was and what he was doing all those times he’d been with her. He’d responded that he hadn’t been doing anything special. He’d just been getting away for fresh air and spending time alone to sort out his thoughts.
Reality had been a hard slap. Spending time with her hadn’t been as special to him as it had been to her. They’d been sneaking around like teenagers and she started to wonder if the reason was because he’d been embarrassed to be seen with her. He would always be an O’Brien and she would always be a McCabe. And he, like everyone in Bluff, would always see her in a different light because of it.
When she’d learned that she was pregnant, she panicked. A real life with Ryder was out of the question. Dating Trouble and the others had been her way of throwing everyone off the trail, including Ryder. He wouldn’t want a McCabe baby any more than her parents would ever accept an O’Brien. It would be bad enough in her parents’ eyes that she was pregnant without being married, but having an O’Brien in the family would be all-out war. Not only would her parents make her life miserable but they’d make her unborn child miserable, too.
And that wasn’t even the worst of it. She feared that Ryder—who was just spending time w
ith her, not getting serious—would want to man up and do the right thing by his child. His Texas upbringing would influence him, and he’d probably propose marriage. If hormones got the best of her—and they had made her crazy so far—she might actually accept. And then what?
Would they stay together for the sake of the child eighteen unhappy years until said kid went off to college and the two of them could finally separate? That’s exactly what her parents had done. Her own mother had been forced to come back and had never been the same. Faith’s father didn’t curb his appetite for chasing pretty much anything in a skirt. Faith had known since she was old enough to figure out what was happening. And her mother was broken. Still broken. She seemed different lately. Worse, if that was even possible.
Faith’s siblings seemed blind to it all. And they were another reason a relationship between her and Ryder could never work...if her father didn’t kill him, her brothers would. The O’Briens and McCabes were worse than oil and water. They were gasoline and forest fire.
Even so, maybe it was good that her secret was out. Working side by side, she could convince Ryder the best course of action would be to keep the secret. Surely he would come to the same conclusion she had. Besides, she had a plan.
Break the news and each guy she’d gone out with would distance himself from any suspicion of being the father of her child. And then she could tell her parents that she wanted to bring up her baby alone. She didn’t really care who the father was, even though her heart screamed at her that she did. Her father wouldn’t interfere with her plans to leave town. Heck, he’d tell her to get out after embarrassing him. And then she and her baby could live in peace. That was the only real chance her child had of growing up normal.
Righteous or not, telling Ryder complicated her plans. Had she really believed that she could’ve left town without telling him about the baby? She’d initially feared that he’d put two and two together when news of her pregnancy broke. And that’s exactly the reason she’d handled their breakup the way she had. The O’Briens were proud, honest men. And her actions had been the only way to ensure Ryder wouldn’t do anything stupid, like propose marriage for the baby’s sake and ruin both their lives. A fist tightened in her stomach. Breathe.