by Dawn Gray
“How can this be? She has no outward signs of vampirism; in fact, she has no inward signs either. The only thing I get is this overwhelming feeling of being near you.” Julian asked, looking at his blond friend.
“I can explain it to you, if you like.”
“I would, very much so.” Julian said and looked back at me. “What a remarkable young woman you must be.”
“I’m just ordinary.” I said and shrugged. “There’s nothing very remarkable about me, Julian.”
“We’ll see.” He smiled and looked at Michael. “Later, we’ll talk.” I watched him walk away. Michael smiled and then looked at me.
“And, that’s why he’s never met you before.” He smiled. I looked at him, and then shook my head.
“What a strange man.” I said softy, and we walked out the back door onto the patio to watch the birds, and Jack from there.
I watched the approaching storm from the large bay windows in the reading room that faced the back of the house, smiling at every flash of lightening and wanting to giggle at the very sound of thunder. These seemed to be my elements, when events were about to happen in my life; they were brought to me by thunderstorms, riding the dark black clouds as they rolled in. I thought about Justin, and how he seemed to be just like those storms; the thunder was his loud ego and the lightening imitated his sudden mood changes. I wondered what he was doing at that moment, and if he thought of me.
A slight noise made me turn around and look at the approaching figure behind me. The room was dark, so that I could see the lightening more clearly, and this person was nothing more than a silhouette at the moment, until he reached me and I saw his eyes.
“Are you thinking about him?” Cristian asked softly. I smiled.
“Would it anger you if I was?” I questioned back. Cristian crossed his arms and shook his head. “Then why ask?”
“Am I really that bad?” He smiled at me.
“Is he?”
“Just so you know, I didn’t tell Michael about you and him.” Cristian said as I turned back to the window. He watched the expression on my face, then as I slowly closed my eyes. “If you care about him that much, Sage, why don’t you tell Michael about him?”
“He asked me not too.” I said and opened them, turned my head and looked at him. “And, it’s not time.”
“He wants to know if I’ve seen him.”
“What did you tell him?” I glanced over his face as he sighed. “Why didn’t you tell him the truth?”
“Your name would have come up.”
“I’m a big girl, Cris, I can handle it.”
“Listen to me, Sage. You don’t seem to understand what happened between them. It could be dangerous for you to be involved.”
“I am already involved, Cristian, with both of them.” I said and shook my head. “Stop trying to protect me, can’t you see that I don’t want it?”
“But, you might need it.”
“You can’t keep everyone away from your brother, Cristian.”
“I can try.”
“Do you think that not telling him is going to protect Michael from finding out he’s here, in New London?” I quietly asked, my frustrations mounting. “Michael wants to see him, wants to know. You can’t keep it from him forever.”
“What about you?” He softly questioned. “Are you going to tell your father about the man you’re talking about? Are you going to tell him that if Justin comes here, it’s because of you?”
“Look, I will tell him, but not now.”
“Now is as good a time as any.”
“Maybe the two of you should get together and talk to him.” A female voice interrupted. Both of us turned to look at Ashley as she walked into the room, arms crossed. The light flipped on and she stood next to us. “Why are you so secretive about Justin’s whereabouts? How come your face turned white when Michael asked about the young man you were so interested in?”
Ashley smiled and looked from one to the other. “These were questions that were running through my mind and all day I was trying to find the connection, and then it hit me. There would be only one reason both of you are so quiet about this. He was the man that Cristian was trying to protect you from that Cristian would rather not have here.”
“This is not of your concern.” Cristian said and shook his head.
“It is my concern. Michael is my sire and what affects him, affects me.” Ashley said and looked at me, for I had been standing there quietly. She looked at the blank look in my eyes, and then watched as I walked out the door. “Gee, I wonder where she’s going.”
“I don’t have to wonder.” Cristian sighed. “I know.”
I stopped the black BMW next to the entrance of the woods, for I had driven back home, not to collect some forgotten items, but to see if I might catch Justin. I traveled through the woods, as the rain started to come down lightly, and found myself in the clearing that I usually saw him in. There was no one there, no sign of him anywhere. Quickly I ran back to the car and drove over to the apartment that he shared. There was no answer to the four times I rang the doorbell, and when I turned the handle, it was locked.
Once more, I got into the car and drove, ending up, this time, at the Ravenloft. I searched the crowds, looking for a man dressed in black in a sea of colors, and spotted him, just as he walked behind a curtain with a young man. I made my way through the crowd, shifting this way and that around and in between bodies in motion. When reached the curtain I stopped, and reached my hand out for it, as if it might not be real, and then I pulled it aside and stepped in. The room behind it was a bright green, with flashing blues, yellows, and purples. Once my eyes adjusted to the strobes that danced around the room, I spotted a door. The room, the green one, seemed to have strangeness to it. There were couches and chairs, small coffee tables and lamps, but it seemed to be empty of people.
I stepped into the room, just behind the door and stood against the wall, while my hand felt for the light, as my eyes adjusted to the complete darkness, and I found a switch only a foot away to the left.
I flipped on the light and looked at the body that lay at my feet. A man, in his early thirties lay on the floor in front of me, wide-eyed and bleeding from the gashing hole in his neck.
I suppressed a scream, only to have it come out anyway, when the young man that had been with Justin, came staggering towards me, arms out in front of him, like a monster. The boy was suddenly tossed aside as a black object moved at me swiftly, like a blur and pinned me against the wall. My eyes widened, my arms were up against the wall as if I were under arrest, my mouth was slightly open and I held my breath as I looked into two bright red eyes, The fire in them slowly faded, and then backed slowly away. I suddenly got the full view of my attacker and began to breath.
“What are you doing here?” He asked me angrily. His eyes lightening to a dark, almost black color. I slowly reached out to touch Justin’s cheek, but he stepped back once more. “I could have killed you.”
“I...I needed to see you.” I whispered. He shook his head and closed his eyes. “I saw you come in here and followed you.”
“Don’t ever do that again!” He replied and walked away from me, stepping over the bodies on the floor. “What do you want from me?”
“I just...” I stopped and watched him walk over to the small bed that was in the corner of the room. He sat there, leaned forward, put his elbows on his knees as he folded his hands, and looked up at me, waiting. “It wasn’t important. I’ll leave, now.”
I turned to go, placed my hand on the door handle, and then felt the warmth of a body against me, I paused as I turned a little and looked up into Justin’s eyes.
“I don’t want to hurt you, again, Justin.” I said softy and looked away from him. “I shouldn’t have come.”
I moved out the door and walked through the green room, feeling his eyes on me and I turned just as I reached the curtain. He was standing in the doorway, one hand against the doorsill, above his head, the other, just
barely on his hip.
I sighed and stepped back from the curtain. “I just need to know one thing.”
“What’s that?” He asked.
“Michael.” I whispered. He sighed and closed his eyes, and then with his lips pressed tightly together, he looked up at me again.
“What about him?”
“Will you come see him?”
“You know the answer to that, Sage.” He answered and turned, leaning his back against the doorsill that his hand had just been on. He put his hands in the pockets of his jeans and crossed his legs at the ankles. Justin looked over at me. “Did you come all this way to ask me that?”
“No.” I whispered, and stopped playing with my car keys then shook my head. “There was something else I wanted to ask you?”
“Sage.” He said softy, then walked over to me. Justin stood about three feet from me and he looked into my eyes. “What do you want from me?”
“You.” I replied and shrugged, then looked up at him and shrugged again. “That’s it, just you.”
“That’s a lot to ask.” He replied and shook his head. “What if I told you that you couldn’t have me?”
“Bullshit.” I whispered and stepped back from him.
“What?” He smiled.
“You and Cristian, you’re both so full of it.” I replied and gave him an angry smile. “What do you think you’re going to accomplish by pushing me away again.”
“I never let you in.”
“Oh, screw you, Tudorian!” I said and shook my head. “Why don’t you take that tough guy act and shove it, because I can see right through it!”
“Sage, grow up.”
“Me?” I smiled and put my back against the wall. I knew what I was doing, egging him on, and I knew that he responded to it, and that he would let his guard down when I hit the right button. “I’m not the child who’s hiding behind a confrontation that happened two hundred years ago. I’m not the adolescent that won’t grow up and let by gone be by gone. Don’t tell me to grow up, Justin, I’m not like you. I act my age, not like a child of three.”
“You really should think about leaving now.” He said and put his hand on his hips.
“Gonna hurt me?” I asked, and shrugged. “Go ahead. Do what every other man has ever done to me. Hurt me, I dare you too.”
“You little witch.” Justin said his anger mounting.
“Oh, name calling. Real mature.” I laughed. “What are you going to do next, start throwing stones?”
I watched his fangs grow as he smiled and I knew he had almost reached his boiling point. I took in a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“Justin, you can’t help what you are.” I whispered as he stared me down. I turned my head to the side and moved my hair, while I watched the expression on his face, and my heartbeat faster. I pulled the collar of my shirt down and smiled. “Come on, Justin, do it.” I looked at his face, and then smiled. “Don’t be such a child. Grow up, be a man.” I watched his chest rise and fall as his breathing quickened. “DO IT.”
I watched him move towards me and I closed my eyes. I felt his body against me then his hands were on my face, turning me towards him. I opened my eyes and looked into his bright red ones again. I waited for him to move, to turn my head back and attack, but he just held there.
“You always let me in, Justin.” I whispered, as I reached up and touched his chest, where his heart was. “No matter how much you try, I’m always right in here.”
“One of these days, Sage, you’re going to get hurt.” He whispered to me, as I turned my head to the side and looked away from him.
“I already am.” I said softly. Justin put his lips against my cheek and sighed as he closed his eyes.
“I mean that one of these times, I’m not going to be able to stop.” He replied. I wrapped my arms around his waist and turned my head to face him. Justin put his forehead against mine.
“How do you feel about me?” I asked. Justin moved back and looked away, but never really let go. “Please, I need to know.”
“Why?” Justin questioned.
“Michael wants to know where you are. He wants you to come home and see him.” I whispered.
“Are you your father’s messenger?” He asked. I closed my eyes and shook my head. “Then stop asking me to see him.”
“I can’t.” I whispered.
“It’s not all that hard to do, Sage.” Justin said and took my hands from around his waist. He stepped back, out of my reach and watched the tears slide down my face.
“I can’t help but ask, Justin.” I sighed and looked at him.
“Tell me the real reason, Sage?” He questioned. “The real reason you want me there.”
“I feel like you won’t come if I ask you to come for me.”
“Come for you?” He sat down on the chair and looked at the ceiling. “If it were only that easy?”
“It can be.” I whispered.
“Yeah, right.” He looked back at me sadly. “My brothers, my brothers, both of them, are there. They think I’m evil, Sage, that I’m the devil. I can’t be there with them, while they think that, and still be so close to you. Think about yourself, about how this would affect you if we were to argue. Do you want to see the three of us at each other’s throats?”
“I’m going to tell him where you are.” I whispered at him. Justin shook his head.
“That wouldn’t be a wise decision.” He replied. I smiled.
“Coming here wasn’t one of my most wise ones either.” I replied and shook my head. “I still don’t have you.”
I turned and walked out of the room, into the crowd of people and just as I got to the stairs to leave, I turned and looked at Justin, who stood on the edge of the crowd looking at me.
“No matter what your mind tells you, about your brothers about me, your heart is what you follow.” I whispered towards him, knowing full well that he could hear me. “When you want me, come and find me.”
I ran up the stairs quickly and out of the club. When I was away from the lights and the music stopped and I leaned against a brick wall. The tears that I tried to control seemed to come fast as I stood there, leaned my head back against the wall and breathed in deeply, then I moved away and walked towards my car.
The lights were all on when I arrived at the house. After parking the car, I slowly made my way to the front door, knowing that Michael would be waiting when I stepped inside. I looked at him, the way he sat, slouched down in a large chair, illuminated by a small table lamp. His eyes looked over me as I stood in the doorway of the sitting room, then he sat forward and rested his lower arms on his knees.
“They wouldn’t tell me where you went.” Michael sighed. He looked at his fingers then up at me.
“They really didn’t know.” I whispered to him and leaned against the wall. “Even if they did know, it wouldn’t have mattered. I wasn’t going anywhere dangerous.”
“Where did you go?” He asked.
“The Ravenloft.” I replied and walked over to the chair next to him. “I went to see a friend. I thought that I could convince him to go home.”
“Did you convince him?”
“No.” I replied and shook my head. Michael watched me look down at the floor, sniffle, and then look back at him with watery eyes. “He doesn’t believe that he’s wanted there.”
“Is he?”
“More than he knows.” I replied and rubbed my forehead. “Did Cristian talk to you about Justin, yet?”
“No, why do you ask?”
“I think I might know where he is.” I said softly. Michael stood and walked over to me; he knelt down on the floor in front of me and took my hand.
“Can you tell me?”
“He’s afraid.”
“Of?”
“You.” I whispered. “He thinks that you don’t want him, he believes that you think he’s evil.”
“How do you know all this?” Michael questioned. He looked into my blue eyes and sat back a bit. “Your fr
iend, the one you saw tonight, was it Justin?”
“I need him, Mike.” I said in a voice almost nonexistent, and leaned down close to him, licking my lips. “I feel him in me, like that uncontrollable force, and it binds me to him.”
“He’s the man that you were talking about; the one Cristian was trying to protect you from?” Michael stood suddenly and backed away.
“Please, listen to me before you say anything.” I begged. Michael put his hand over his mouth and looked out the window. “He’s never hurt me, and I don’t think he ever could. Michael, they never told me that he was coming.”
“He’s been with you, with Cristian, and you decide that now you’re going to tell me?” Michael asked and looked at me.
“It wasn’t time.” I whispered and looked at my hands. “There was so much more to say, I just thought it would be easier.”
Michael sighed and looked over at me quickly. “Where is the Ravenloft?”
“I don’t think he’s there anymore.”
“Then where is he?” I could hear the anger in Michael’s voice suddenly and I shook my head.
“I left him there, but he doesn’t stay.” I whispered. “I could find him though, if you help me.”
“Why isn’t he with you?”
“He thinks that you two would argue and I would be caught in the middle.”
“Does he love you?”
“Does it matter?” I asked him. Michael shrugged. “Whether he loves me or not, Mike, he won’t come because he doesn’t want to.”
“Can you take me to him?” Michael asked.
“That won’t be necessary.” A voice interrupted both Michael and I looked up at the man standing in the doorway. He was dressed in a pair of dark blue Dockers, and a tan dress shirt, unbuttoned around the collar. He stood, with his hands in his pockets, looking at the two of us.
“Justin!” I smiled and stood up. He winked at me, caringly. I didn’t know what to do, run and hold him, or just stay there. I decided to avoid the awkward situation and not jump into his arms, after looking at the shock on Michael’s face.