Forgiving Hearts: Duncurra 1-3

by Ceci Giltenan

  “I need to gather some medicinal herbs,” she answered by way of explanation.

  “In the village?”

  She laughed. “Nay, lad, there are not many herbs growing in the village.”

  The boy looked uncomfortable and asked, “So ye are planning to ride outside the walls?”

  She laughed again. “Aye, lad. I will need to if I want to gather herbs.”

  “Then where is your escort, my lady?”

  “My escort? I don’t need any help.”

  Looking even more uncomfortable, he said, “My lady, ye can’t ride outside the walls of Duncurra without an escort. It wouldn’t be safe. The laird would never allow it. If ye will wait a bit, I will find the laird or Diarmad so an escort can be arranged.”

  She smiled at him and said, “Nay, lad. Thank you, but I don’t wish to pull anyone away from more important work.”

  Disappointed, she left the stables. It seemed silly to tie up manpower with an escort, especially since she didn’t really need to ride. She just wanted to for the enjoyment of it. She could gather much of what she required just beyond the village, so she strolled down the sloping crag through the crofts. When she reached the barbican, the watch there stopped her. “My lady, I can’t let ye pass.”

  “Excuse me?” she asked, not quite believing what she heard. “I’m just going to gather some herbs in the heath beyond the village.”

  “I’m sorry, my lady, if ye will just wait a moment, I will send for a guardsman to go with ye.”

  “That really won’t be necessary,” said Katherine, feeling a bit irritated. “I’m not going far.”

  “I’m sorry, my lady, but the laird would not want ye to go outside Duncurra’s walls without an escort. It will only take a few minutes to fetch one of the guardsmen,” he said, motioning to another of the men-at-arms to go and do just that.

  Katherine put her hand up to stop him. “Nay, thank you, but it isn’t necessary.” She turned to walk back through the village and up the hill to the keep. This is completely ridiculous. How was she supposed to gather the supplies she needed? She certainly had no intention of arguing with a stable boy or men-at-arms when they only followed orders, but she would have a discussion about it with Niall as soon as she could be alone with him.

  The discussion didn’t wait that long. Katherine had barely swallowed her first bite of the evening meal when Niall asked, “Where were ye going today that ye didn’t want an escort?”

  His voice sounded very nonchalant, but when she looked at him she could see the displeasure written plainly on his face. She wanted to tell him how she felt about being little more than a prisoner in her home. Instead she said, “Niall, can we talk about this later, when we are alone?”

  “I asked ye a question, Katherine, and I want an answer,” he pressed, his annoyance now clearly expressed in his tone.

  “I wanted to go to the heath to gather some herbs I need for medicines.” She hoped that answer would do for now.

  “Why couldn’t you do that with an escort?”

  “It wasn’t that I couldn’t gather herbs with an escort; I didn’t think it was necessary to pull someone away from their work for something as ridiculous as watching me gather herbs.” Now Katherine was getting angry, too. “Please, can we discuss this later?”

  “There is nothing more to discuss. If ye need to leave the walls of Duncurra, ye will have an escort.” Niall said this loudly enough that those sitting closest to them stared.

  Katherine nodded but said nothing. There was more to discuss but she wouldn’t do it here. She shifted her attention back to her trencher.

  “Do ye understand me?”

  Raising her head slowly, she leveled a glare at him and said very quietly, “Neither my hearing nor my intellect are impaired. I understand you perfectly.”

  “Are ye angry with me?” he asked, sounding surprised.

  She pulled the reins of her temper back in and adopted an unconcerned expression, before saying calmly, “It doesn’t matter. I understand there is nothing more to discuss.”

  “Ye disagree?” Again he seemed astounded.

  Of course, she disagreed, she thought angrily. She would not have asked to discuss it later if she felt there was nothing to discuss. She wanted to yell that at him but to do so would only raise his ire further and make everyone around them painfully uncomfortable. “I would never disagree with you in public.”

  This seemed to appease him and soon Diarmad drew him into conversation. She picked at the meal in front of her, but she had no appetite left for it. When a sufficient amount of time had passed and Tomas had finished eating, she excused herself to take him for a bath and ready him for bed.

  Generally only the laird and the lady or their honored guests had a bath prepared for them in an upstairs chamber. Most everyone else bathed behind a screened area in one of the kitchens, where they could heat the water and fill the bath with much less effort. Katherine sent Fineen, one of Duncurra’s chamber maids, to get a fresh léine for Tomas while she led him to the kitchen. Never happy about having to stop playing and wash, Tomas grumbled and complained through the entire bath.

  She felt hot and tired, not to mention still very angry, by the time she finally had him tucked in bed. The last thing she wanted to do was go back down to the great hall. She retired to their chamber to spend the rest of the evening alone, sewing.

  ~ * ~

  After the meal, Niall sat brooding by the hearth with Diarmad and Fingal.

  “What ails ye, brother?” Fingal asked.

  Niall shook his head, took a long pull of ale from his tankard, and didn’t answer.

  “If I had to guess,” offered Diarmad, “I would say it was the argument he had with his wee wife at the table.”

  “That isn’t your concern.”

  “Nay, Laird, it probably isn’t. But then I am not the one who brought the issue up during the meal for all to hear, am I?”

  Niall just glared.

  “What issue?” asked Fingal, who hadn’t heard the discussion.

  “According to the watch, Lady Katherine wanted to go walking beyond the village this afternoon, but did not seem to think she needed an escort. She wouldn’t let him call one for her and she returned to the keep.”

  “Why would she do that?” asked Fingal.

  “That’s what I asked her,” growled Niall.

  “What did she say?”

  Niall shook his head again, and took another drink from his tankard.

  “She said she would prefer to talk about it privately,” answered Diarmad.

  “Then go talk to her,” said Fingal reasonably. “Surely the lad is in bed by now.”

  “Now, ye see, Fingal, that is where the problem started,” said Diarmad.

  “There is nothing to discuss. There is no reason for her to leave the walls alone and I told her that,” said Niall angrily. “Why would she want to?” The suspicion in his tone was clear.

  Fingal sighed. “It always comes back to that, Niall. She isn’t mother…or Ceana”

  Niall gave Fingal a murderous glare, but his brother was not dissuaded. “Can’t ye see ye married a guileless lass? Do ye truly believe Katherine set out to deceive ye?”

  “Why would she shun an escort otherwise?” Niall demanded.

  “I don’t know. Perhaps she doesn’t understand why she needs one. Did ye ask her why?”

  “How could she possibly think she doesn’t need one? And aye, I did ask her why, but her answer didn’t make any sense,” Niall said dismissively.

  “She said she didn’t think it was necessary to pull someone away from other duties,” Diarmad explained.

  Fingal laughed. “Niall, she doesn’t understand.”

  “How could she not understand? She is a noblewoman. Surely she has been guarded her whole life. Why would she think it different here?” Niall’s anger was rising. He yelled, “What does she think I have a guard for anyway, if not to protect what is important to me?”

  Fingal ask
ed, “Is it possible her loving uncle did not assure she was guarded, and so she doesn’t expect to be guarded here?”

  “That is ridiculous.”

  “Is it?” asked Fingal. “We are talking about the lass who looked like a servant when you first met her, are we not? The same one whose uncle not only laid her back open with a whip, but happily married her to an impoverished stranger for his own gain? Ambrose Ruthven had absolutely nothing to lose by risking her life.”

  Diarmad swore and said, “It’s a wonder she lived long enough for the king to marry her off. There should be a special place in hell for beasts like Ruthven.”

  “Aye, and I would love to be the one to send him there,” Niall growled.

  “Go talk to her, Niall,” Fingal urged.

  Niall shook head in exasperation, rose, and walked toward the entrance to the tower.

  Just before leaving the hall he overheard Diarmad say to Fingal, “Do you suppose he will ever learn all women are not apples from the same tree?” He ignored the comment and climbed the stairs to his chamber. Entering, he found Katherine sitting in a chair, sewing by the light of a candle. She was a vision with her cloud of hair floating softly around her shoulders, wearing only a shift. She didn’t look up as he entered the room. He took off his plaid then sat in the other chair before speaking.

  “Katherine, how many men did your uncle set to guard ye at Cotharach?”

  “I required no guard at Cotharach,” she said in a slightly defensive tone.

  Niall arched an eyebrow, “Ye have never had guards charged with your safety?”

  “Not since I was a little girl.”

  “Just exactly when did ye stop needing protection?”

  “I don’t know. After my father died, I guess, when the Ruthven holdings became mine.”

  “Why would ye stop needing protection then?”

  “Because—it was my home, they were my people.”

  “So when your father was alive, he travelled around his lands with no guard?”

  Katherine thought for a moment. “I don’t remember. Nay, I think he was usually accompanied by at least one of his men.”

  “Katherine, ye were four and ten when your father died. If he never traveled around his holdings alone, why would it be safe for ye to?”

  “I don’t know. I didn’t go very far and there were more important things for the guards to do.”

  “Sweetling, what could possibly be more important than the safety of their lady?”

  She looked at him as if she was trying to come up with a logical answer but couldn’t.

  “Come here,” he said.

  She lay her sewing aside with a frustrated sigh and crossed to where he sat. He pulled her gently onto his lap and put his arms around her. “I can only guess at why your uncle didn’t ensure your protection, and it is probably only by the grace of God ye came to no harm. The country abounds with thieves and banished clansmen. I suspect your uncle has his share of enemies, too. I’m sure your father knew the dangers, because he secured your safety as well as his own. Why would ye expect me to do less than that?”

  “That’s not what I—you misunderstood—I—I can’t waste your guards’ time just to gather herbs,” she said, as if it made perfect sense to her.

  “What do ye suppose my guards do, if not protect what I value?”

  “But what harm could come to me just beyond the village?”

  “I don’t ever want to find out,” he said, kissing her head. “And I won’t because ye won’t leave the walls without an escort,” he said firmly. Before she could argue more, he added, “Katherine, guarding ye is an honor, not a chore, and nothing the members of my guard do is more important.”

  Still sounding miffed, Katherine asked, “If I wasn’t allowed outside of the walls without an escort, why did you not tell me that?”

  “I didn’t think I had to.”

  “But you had to tell your men.”

  “Nay, I didn’t. Sweetling, like your father, I rarely leave Duncurra alone. My men know the dangers and would certainly not let ye venture out without a guard, whether I had given an order or not.”

  She sighed and after a moment said, “I guess I can’t stay angry with you, then.”

  “Nay, ye cannot. I won’t allow it.” He buried his face in her neck, kissing her until she giggled. Then he captured her lips in a kiss intended to make her forget she was ever angry in the first place.

  He carried her gently to the bed, and made slow tender love to her. Later, as she lay sleeping in his arms, he marveled once again at his good fortune in gaining such a sweet bride. The thought of what might have happened to her in the years under her uncle’s control made him shudder. The thought of losing her now chilled his very soul. He finally admitted to himself it was neither admiration nor gratitude giving rise to these feelings. He was fond of her. Perhaps he was more than fond.

  Chapter 11

  The next morning, Niall waited for Katherine at the breakfast table. “This is a surprise,” she said happily as she joined him.

  “It is the first of several I have planned today,” he said mysteriously.

  “Who else do you plan to surprise?” she asked, laughing.

  “Oh, my sweet little wife, the surprises are all for ye.” She gave him the brilliant smile he adored. “I realize I have spent very little time getting to know ye since we were wed.”

  She blushed and said very softly, “My dear husband, if we spent any more time ‘knowing’ each other, I fear nothing would ever be accomplished here.”

  He laughed. “Aren’t ye the cheeky little wench this morning?”

  She blushed even deeper.

  “Now that ye mention it, I may have to allow a bit of time for that particular pursuit, but I had something else in mind. It looks to be a fine day, and I thought perhaps ye would like to go out riding with me. Ye can see more of the MacIan lands than Duncurra and its village, and we can spend some time alone.”

  “I would love to go riding with you,” she answered, overjoyed.

  When they finished eating, he took her hand. “Shall we go?”

  “I will meet you in the stable. There are some things I need Edna to take care of today. I will only be a few minutes.” When she arrived at the stable, Cairbre, Muir, and Turcuil were also preparing mounts. She whispered to Niall, “I thought you said we were spending the day alone?”

  He whispered back, “I thought I told ye I rarely left Duncurra without guardsmen, and ye were never to leave without them. But don’t worry, they will keep their distance.” Then in a normal voice, he said, “What have ye brought there?”

  “The supplies required to collect the odd herb or plant I might find.”

  “Lass, this is not a day for work. Ye can gather herbs tomorrow—with an escort.”

  She laughed and grinned. “I won’t gather common herbs, but if I see something rarer to come by, it would be foolish to leave it behind, would it not?”

  “I suppose,” he agreed, feigning disappointment.

  She laughed again.

  He helped her mount Eachann and they headed out. “Niall, what about Tomas?” she asked in alarm before they reached the barbican.

  “Taken care of,” he said smugly. “I have assigned Uncle Fingal to keep an eye on him today. Later Alan or Keith will go with them to the loch to fish and swim.” At the look of surprise on her face, he said, “My foster son doesn’t leave Duncurra without a sufficient escort, either.”

  “Aye, husband, I’m beginning to see a pattern. You’ve made your point.”

  When they reached the heath, as Niall had promised, the guardsmen fell back to a discreet distance. Katherine was suddenly and inexplicably shy. Finally breaking the silence, she asked, “Where are we going?”

  “I thought we would ride around the northern side of Loch Craos, then east a bit. The raids have occurred at the western edge of my holding and, while none were during the day, I don’t want you anywhere near Matheson land.”

  At mid
morning they came to a marshy area on the northeastern side of the loch and she asked, “Niall, can we stop here for a bit? Marshes harbor many useful plants and herbs.”

  “I did not intend for ye to work on this excursion.”

  “It isn’t work. Please, I just want to see what might be growing here.”

  Her eyes shown with excitement and he couldn’t refuse her. He handed their horses off to Muir and walked with her towards the marsh. To his surprise, his wife removed her shoes and airisaidh before pulling the hem of her léine between her legs and tucking it into her belt in the front. This pulled the bottom of the garment up to just below her knees. “What are ye doing?” he asked.

  “I have to wade in a bit to see everything and I don’t want my clothes to get wet.”

  “Can’t ye just look from the edge?”

  Katherine’s musical laughter enveloped him. “Can ye hunt without going into the forest? All I can see from the edge is the tall purple loosestrife and that is easy to find close to Duncurra. Come with me. I’ll show you what the marsh hides.” She beckoned, holding her hand out to him.

  How could he resist? Taking her hand, he waded in with her.

  She pointed out a variety of common plants. She was pleased when she found bog bean, but became positively delighted when she discovered something she called marsh mallow.

  “I wasn’t sure I would find it this far north. It grew in the marshes near Cotharach, but it isn’t very common in colder areas. It’s an amazing plant; the flowers, the leaves, even the roots, are useful. Late summer is the perfect time of year to harvest it, too.” She gathered some, saying, “You’ll thank me the next time you get a sore throat.”

  “I’ll thank ye to leave the muck of this marsh behind,” he said. At her look of dismay, he softened his tone and caressed her cheek. “I’m teasing, pet, but ye needn’t gather it all now. I will send men to harvest a larger quantity on another day.”