by Vanessa Kier
Seth leaned his forehead on hers. “Thank God.” He gave a shaky laugh. “I don’t have more than a few cents to my name and I don’t even have a job yet, although I did just receive a potential offer from WAR, the group your brother works for.”
Kirra stroked her hand over his hair. “I don’t care about that, liefie. It’s Seth the man I love, not his money. Besides,” she gestured to the posh furnishings in the trailer, “I’m making decent money. The benefit concerts have resulted in skyrocketing album sales.”
“I’m so happy for you.” He hugged her and ran his hands down her back. Then he gave her a long, slow kiss that erased all those weeks of doubts and worries.
“Knowing I had you waiting for me was the only way I stayed sane,” he told her.
He pulled her hips against his and she wriggled to get closer. “Are you done for the evening?” he murmured.
“Yes.” Kirra took his mouth again, unable to get enough of his taste. Finally she broke away. “Take me to bed, Seth.”
He scooped her into his arms and carried her to the bed, then proceeded to undress her with a reverence that brought tears to her eyes. If the last time they’d made love had been about good-bye, this time was all about hello. They took their time relearning one another’s bodies. When Seth finally entered her, Kirra sighed at the perfection and the sense of wholeness. And when at last he sent her flying into a powerful release, all the tension she’d been carrying incinerated and was replaced with a sense of peace and hope.
Some time later, Kirra traced a pattern on Seth’s bare chest. He’d just finished explaining about the tedious hours of questioning and testifying, and his shock over being released with a clean record. “I’m so proud of you for keeping your cool when faced with the general.”
“Yeah, well, I had a lot of time to think about what happened and everything you said to me about letting my anger go. I even spoke to a therapist a few times. And giving the news of the commendations to my teammates’ families really helped give me a different perspective. Not one of them blamed me for the deaths of their loved ones. So it finally got through my thick skull that maybe I could leave my anger in the past.”
She kissed him through her tears. “What happened with your family?”
Seth sucked in a breath. When he finally released it and began to talk, emotion thickened his voice. “I went to visit them at the SSU compound. My mom welcomed me back as if I’d only just walked out the door the day before. When I disappeared, she’d contacted the military and been told that I didn’t exist. She decided that meant I was working on some top-secret mission. So when the SSU agents told her that she needed to go into protective custody because of something I was involved in, she concluded she’d been right. She—” his voice cracked.
Kirra rubbed her cheek on his chest in silent understanding.
“All these years of no word and my mom still thinks of me as her hero,” Seth said thickly.
“You didn’t try to convince her otherwise, did you?”
He huffed in disbelief. “Are you kidding? She’s as stubborn as you are.”
“Hmm. What about your sister?”
“Ah.” He drummed his fingers on Kirra’s lower back, which sent sensual little pulses to delightful places. “Danika was furious that I’d put them in danger, and wary about letting me back into her life. I don’t blame her. She’d had to pull Brianna, my niece, out of school in order to go with the SSU agents. She resented the disruption. Plus, she didn’t want Brianna to become attached to me only to have me disappear again.”
“So what happened?”
He chuckled. “My mom stepped in and handled it. She told Danika that kids are resilient. That it would be irresponsible of her to deny Brianna a chance to know her only uncle. My mom explained that since I’m a man who was willing to make the ultimate sacrifice for his country, I’d set a good example for my niece.”
“Smart mom.”
“Yeah, she’s always been a rock.” He cleared his throat. “So Danika eventually let me meet Brianna and…uh…Damn if that little girl didn’t wrap me around her finger. Within ten minutes I found myself having tea with her dolls and stuffed animals.”
Kirra laughed. “I can just picture it. Big, bad, scary Seth playing nice with a bunch of Teddy Bears and Barbies. Please tell me you wore a pink boa.”
“Worse,” he grumbled. “Apparently all guests must wear a special tiara decorated with pink rhinestones, and a glittery, pink-and-silver cape.”
Kirra burst out laughing.
“It’s not funny. My sister took photos. If I ever forget Brianna’s birthday or other important milestones, Danika will send the photos my next employer.” He sighed dramatically. “I thought I was finished with being blackmailed.”
“Ha! I think I like your sister.”
“Don’t even think about joining her to gang up on me,” Seth warned. “Speaking of siblings, how’s it going with Dev?”
Kirra sighed. “He’s as thick-headed as always, but deep inside he does love me. He pulled my mostly burnt guitar out of the wreckage of the bus, which was incredibly sweet and thoughtful of him. I never would have believed he’d think to do that.”
“Does it help, having it back?”
“Yes. Even though it’s burnt, I hung it on a wall in my studio. As a reminder that violence scarred me, but didn’t destroy me.”
Seth raised her hand to his lips. “Like your tattoo. Very sexy, by the way.”
“Yes.” She listened to the comforting beat of Seth’s heart a moment. “So, Dev is still finding it hard to fully accept that I’ve matured into a woman capable of making the tough decisions in life. Every few weeks or so he sticks his nose into my business and I have to remind him that I don’t need his help.”
“He’s your brother. He’s always going to worry.”
“I know. Which is why I don’t blow up at him very often. We’ve started to talk regularly, and now talk about important issues, so I feel as if I’ve reached a new level of understanding with him.”
“Excellent.”
“Did you ever figure out why your blackmailer went after you?”
“I talked to Wil Lansing about it. He thinks my blackmailer had plans that required someone with knowledge of American military protocols and helicopters.”
“He was setting you up to be a fall guy?”
“Probably. Lansing suspects the man is well-connected enough to know that I’m alive, but with everything that’s been going on in the region since I left, he believes my blackmailer is too busy to have time to go after me. Plus, Wil hinted that they might be close to taking the man down.”
“I’d prefer to have heard that the man is dead, but we have to work with what we have, right?”
“Aren’t you the fierce one?” Seth teased.
“That’s right. I fought for you. I’m not letting anyone take you from me now.” She’d never meant anything as much as she meant those words. “Does that mean that your family is now safe from your blackmailer?”
“We think so. The SSU located people in law enforcement who weren’t in my blackmailer’s pocket, so the hit man is now behind bars, along with several cops.” Seth snuggled Kirra tighter against his side. “My family is returning home this week. For my peace of mind, I’ve worked out a deal with a security firm recommended by the SSU. They’ll keep an eye on my family for a few more months. Although, I think my sister might have something going on with one of the SSU agents. So she might receive some personal protection.”
“Good for her.”
In response, Seth ran his hand up and down her back, then he murmured, “I’ve bought all of your albums.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. I love your music, so I played them for all my visitors until I’d either converted them to a fan or been ordered to cease and desist.” He laughed. “I even got Brianna dancing around the house to a few of your livelier songs.”
“But—?”
“Now that we’re together a
gain, do you think you could stop writing songs about me? Or at least not sing them in public?”
Kirra raised herself onto her elbow. “Why, Seth Jarrod, who knew you had such an enormous ego? I don’t believe I’ve mentioned your name in a single song.”
He leveled a mock glare at her. “Don’t play games with me. The emotions in those songs are the same ones I’ve been feeling since our separation.”
“Okay, I admit it, you’re right.” She pressed a fast kiss to his lips. “But nope, I’m not going to make any such promise.” She put her mouth close to his ear. “However, I wrote a private song in hopes of seducing you with it some day.”
Desire flickered in his eyes. “Yeah?”
“Uh-huh. Wanna hear it?”
“Damn straight. Anything you’ve got, I want. Now and forever.”
She sat back and gave him a wicked smile. “Forever.”
Chapter Forty
One Month Later
WAR Airfield
The Democratic Republic of the Ivory Coast
West Africa
“So. I’m supposed to vouch for you.”
Seth winced as Marcus Jones leveled a hard stare at him.
Kristoff Wren, the American in charge of WAR’s military teams, had offered Seth a job on the condition that Marcus validate both his flying skills and his trustworthiness. Seth had no doubt that even three years out of practice he could still fly circles around most helicopter pilots. It was the character reference he worried over.
He’d known this meeting was going to be hard. Marcus never had been one to forgive easily. “Yeah,” Seth admitted. “Your boss seems to think you’re some sort of lie detector when it comes to me.” He couldn’t stop a confrontational tone from seeping into his words. “It’s been four fucking years, Marcus. Aren’t you ever going to forgive me?”
He’d expected a smart comeback. Instead, Marcus just watched him without expression. Seth had to give the man credit. He’d aged into an even tougher son-of-a-bitch than when they’d been friends. No matter how much Texas swagger he used to hide it, Marcus was a man you didn’t want to cross. A man you’d be lucky to call friend and have watching your back.
Seth should know. The two of them had gone through flight school together. They’d been roommates. Best friends. Co-conspirators in those crazy stunts that the corporal had been so impressed by. Until they’d had the biggest fight of their lives. Then Marcus had barely been able to tolerate being in the same room as Seth.
“Where the fuck were you?” Marcus demanded. He had his flight helmet under one arm. His hair was sweat-stained and blood dripped down his face from a cut at his temple.
Sick dread tightened Seth’s belly. “Jesus, Marcus, what happened to you?”
“We were attacked. That’s what fucking happened.” Marcus dropped his helmet and shoved Seth up against the wall of the corridor. “Bryan and his crew are dead and two of my crew are critically injured.”
“But Charlie was supposed to be flying for me. Not Bryan.”
Marcus pulled Seth away from the wall so he could slam him back again. “Charlie got food poisoning. In between puking his guts up, he asked Bryan to take your flight instead.”
Seth stared at Marcus in dawning horror. Bryan was a decent pilot, but not—
“If you’d been at the flight controls, the crew would have survived,” Marcus snarled. “Hell, even Charlie, good as he is, would have struggled to fly out of that trap. But you, damn you, you would have flown out of there by the skin of your teeth.”
“I’m sorry.”
Marcus sucked in air and Seth knew he was fighting not to beat him to a pulp. “So I’m asking you again. Where. The. Hell. Were. You?”
Guilt and shame twisted inside Seth, but he’d sworn an oath. “I can’t tell you.”
Marcus shook his head, stunned. Then his lips curled in disgust. “Fine. We’re through.” He jabbed his finger into Seth’s chest. “I’m holding you responsible for their deaths.” Spinning on his heel, Marcus stalked away.
Two days later, Marcus had accepted a transfer to another unit.
Seth sighed. “I asked Charlie to fly for me that day because General Sandberg had assigned me to another mission.” A mission during which Seth and his crew had unknowingly killed innocent people. “I’d taken a vow not to disclose my activities to anyone.” He searched Marcus’s face for any signs of forgiveness, but found nothing encouraging. “I’m sorry I wasn’t with you that day.”
As Seth patiently endured Marcus’s scrutiny, he hoped the increased maturity he sensed in his old friend included an added level of compassion.
“Why the fuck didn’t you call me?” Marcus finally demanded.
“What?” The wounded fury behind Marcus’s question didn’t make sense. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“Once you realized you’d been set up. Once you were on the run. Why didn’t you call me?”
“Because you didn’t even want to talk to—”
“Bullshit. You know I would have been there for you, asshole. Why didn’t you reach out?”
“Because everyone I turned to for help ended up dead. I wasn’t going to do that to you, too!”
“I would’ve helped, no matter the risk.” Marcus met Seth’s eyes. “Once I’d cooled down, I realized that it wasn’t really you I’d been mad at. I blamed myself for not recognizing the signs that we were flying into a trap that day.”
“No. It wasn’t your—”
“—fault. Yeah. I know.” Marcus pinned Seth with a stare. “But you know what it’s like, don’t you? Because you blame yourself for falling under the general’s influence and losing Michael’s team.”
“You’re not supposed to know about that.”
Marcus snorted. “The CID called me. They wanted my take on your character. I told them you would’ve flown into a cliff before knowingly killing innocents.”
It took Seth a moment to speak past the lump in his throat. “Thanks, man.”
“So,” Marcus said, “we good?”
Seth gave a disbelieving laugh. “I think that’s my line.” When Marcus continued to watch him, waiting for an answer, Seth nodded again. “Yeah. We’re good.”
“Excellent. Now, let’s see how your flying skills have held up.” He led Seth outside.
“You know you want to hire me,” Seth said as he followed.
“Yeah? Why’s that?”
“Who else is going to challenge you, fly boy? Since no one’s been breathing down your neck for the spot of top pilot, I bet you’ve become slow and complacent. You should do your teammates a favor and let me join.”
Marcus shot him the finger, just like old times.
Seth grinned. Damn, it felt good.
They rounded the side of the hangar and there she was. A proud beauty of engineering mastery.
His vision blurred.
Christ, he supposed it made him a complete sap and ruined his tough guy image to be getting all freaking teary-eyed over a helicopter. But God, he’d missed flying helicopters so damned much. Cargo planes and passenger jets were all good and fine if you liked fixed wings. But he’d never felt the same visceral thrill with them that he felt with his beloved Black Hawks.
It had hurt so badly those first months on the run that he’d woken up crying, like some broken-hearted idiot who’d been kicked in the balls by his girlfriend. Once he’d started flying fixed-wings, he’d stopped dreaming about helicopters. Except for the nightmares of Michael’s helicopter going down. Those dreams still came, although with decreasing regularity.
Learning to fly fixed-wings had satisfied his need to be in the air, but hadn’t completely filled the void. Still, it had been better than nothing. He thought he’d resigned himself to never flying another Black Hawk. Now that he was on the verge of being in the cockpit again, he was terrified of screwing this up. Because the pain of walking away might kill him.
“Seth? You okay, man?”
Jesus. He must have been lost in
thought longer than he’d realized. Seth gave Marcus the thumbs-up. And there was something else he’d never expected. To be working toward repairing his friendship with Marcus Jones. Former best friend. Still the best damn helicopter pilot Seth had ever met. And yeah, he’d known it even back then but been unable to accept it. Not that there was a hell of a lot of distance between Seth and Marcus. But the little bit of something extra Marcus possessed nudged him into a category all by himself.
Seth didn’t mind admitting that today. Even formerly self-centered bad boys could grow up. And he’d done a hell of a lot of growing since the day his world fell apart.
“Seth?” Marcus prompted.
Great, if he continued to stand here staring into space like an idiot, Marcus would never give him the job. “Sorry. I’m okay. But, if you don’t mind. I’d…ah…like to check her out on my own.”
Marcus raised a brow. “Sure.” He nodded for Seth to go on, then stepped back into the relative coolness of the shade cast by the hangar.
Seth approached the helicopter with reverence. It was the same way Marcus had felt the first time he’d been allowed close to one of these magnificent beasts. An awe born from the love all the best pilots had for their aircraft.
“What’s he doing?” Dev asked a few minutes later, stepping outside to join Marcus in the late afternoon heat. Dev had been the one to drive Seth out here and would escort him back after the flying test.
Out on the tarmac, Seth had his hands pressed palms down against the side of the chopper and his head bowed. The emotion of the posture made Marcus’s throat tighten. “Private moment,” Marcus murmured. He took Dev’s arm and pulled him into the office. “Let’s give the man some space.”
No matter what Seth had done since Southeast Asia, he’d been one of the military’s best pilots. Not being able to fly helicopters, his first love, for all these years would have felt like an amputation.
Marcus knew Seth’s skills would be slightly rusty, but training would take care of that. It was Seth’s heart Marcus had been worried about. And what he’d just seen convinced him that whatever else he’d done, Seth still had the heart of a pilot.