by Tina Gayle
He had forgotten how easy she was to please. Never during their time together had she made any unreasonable demands. She always gave of herself, with no thought of taking what wasn’t freely offered. She made him feel wanted.
It was a refreshing change to be welcomed home. Usually, Jason and Kelly left whenever he came into town. They claimed that they wanted to give him time to himself, but he’d always suspected they wanted to get away from him.
Ever since his parents’ death, he’d felt like he didn’t belong. Now, he had Jillian, and wherever she was would be home.
“No. He’s going home with me.” Her angry response jerked him back to the present. He listened to the people talking around him.
“That’s not a good idea, Jillian. Derek doesn’t seem to be feeling very well right now.” Jason argued. His face flushed, his voice elevated.
“How can you talk about him as if he’s not even here?” she snarled at his brother. “Tell them, Derek! Tell them, you’re going home with me!”
Her eyes begged him to respond. He glanced at the others. They were waiting for his answer. “I’m going home with Jillian.”
“Be reasonable, Derek, you’ve just gotten out of the hospital. Jillian is pregnant. You can’t expect her to take care of you too.” Jason shifted on his feet as if ready to attack.
“I won’t go home without him.” She slid her arms around him and he could feel the anger radiating from her.
He held her tight and ended the conversation. “I’m going home with her.”
The smoky haze in his mind blanketed the anger boiling inside. How could his brother do this to him? Didn’t Jason know how much he wanted, needed, ached to be with Jillian? All the emotions crowding in his mind made Derek want to hurt someone. “There really isn’t any way you can stop me.”
He led Jillian up the stairs to his room, leaving the others behind. Once in his room, she sat on the bed while he gazed at the king-size bed, weight equipment, and a dresser. Those were the only items in the room. No pictures graced the walls. No personal items were left on the dresser. A stranger could have lived here.
Derek never considered this room more than a resting-place. If he had to walk away right now, he wouldn’t miss it. As matter of fact, he would probably prefer it. Stepping to the closet, he grabbed the clothes hanging inside. He needed to pack and get ready to leave.
“We need to talk about this.” She stood in his way as he carried things to his bed. He stared at her, confusion clouded her eyes. She didn’t realize this had been a long time coming.
Yes, he might be a little confused because of his accident, but this was crystal clear. Jason had been at odds with him ever since his parents had died. Derek had to get out now.
“It’ll be okay, Jillian.” He wrapped his arms around her and held her close. He wanted to protect her from the hurt that he was feeling, to somehow find the words to explain it to her. But he couldn’t. And did she really need to know his heartache?
She ran her hands up and down his back. Just knowing she cared helped sooth his raw nerves. He eased back and peered down into her tear-filled eyes. “Don’t cry.”
“Don’t be mad at him. Jason was only trying to protect me, not hurt you. You would have done the same thing for Kelly.” Her gaze begged him to understand. “He’s worried about you too, Derek. He’s only trying to help.”
“No.” He had no doubts behind his brother’s real motivation.
“Yes. He loves you, Derek. But like you, he doesn’t know how to show it. Give him a chance.” Jillian buried her head in his shoulder.
He wanted to believe her, but he refused to delude himself anymore. Jason wanted to separate him from her, the girl he’d married.
A knock on the door interrupted their embrace. “Come in,” she called, turning in his arms.
Slowly, the door opened. His brother stood on the threshold. “The pizza has arrived. Why don’t you guys come down and get something to eat.” A short paused ensued, then Jason continued. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have tried to force you two apart. But I thought it might be better if you stayed here with me, Derek. I guess I was wrong.”
“That’s okay, Jason, we know you were only trying to help.” Jillian smiled up at him. “Don’t we?”
Derek nodded. He’d let her believe the lie, because the truth—that his brother didn’t care—was too ugly to face.
****
Trapped by Derek’s arm across her back, Jillian cuddled closer, pleased to have him sleeping beside her. His body heat enveloped her and she savored the feeling of being protected from the world.
Events from the night before drift through her head. For a while, everyone had been on edge after Jason and Derek’s argument, but thankfully, the evening passed without another incident. However, she’d claimed to be tired so they could cut the evening short. He had come upstairs with her to pack. She must have fallen asleep because she couldn’t remember him coming to bed.
When she woke again, she felt a hand caress her stomach and settle on her breast. She marveled at the intimate contact. His hand squeezed her tender breast.
Fuller and more sensitive with her pregnancy, she moaned with pleasure and glanced over her shoulder at his face. The gray stone wall his eyes presented showed no sign of desire, but Jillian had started to notice small signs whenever Derek was having a strong emotion. He’d freeze with all his attention centered on the person who was causing the intense reaction.
The growth on his cheek reminded her of the dark pirate she’d played with on their first night together. She cupped his cheek, and the small hairs tickled her hand. Fascinated by his face, she explored the fullness of his mouth.
With great care, she touched his lips, tracing the edge with her index finger. Closer and closer, she ventured near the moist center. When his lips parted, she slipped her finger into his mouth.
When his tongue touched her sensitive digit, shivers raced up and down her spine. Her gaze rose to meet his. The concentrated focus on her revealed her place inside the walls his mind had built.
She flicked her tongue over her lips, wanting a taste, a chance to consume him. Her finger slipped from his mouth and she circled her arms around his neck to draw him within inches of her lips. “Kiss me, Derek.”
With little kisses, he fed her desire. However, he didn’t deepen the kiss like she wanted. Instead, he stayed on the edge, tasting the fruit but not devouring the flavor.
His rock hard erection lay against her. Jillian relaxed beneath him, letting him have his fun. With him home, she could afford to wait for him to move into deeper waters and enjoy every step of the adventure. After all, they had a lifetime together; they should have plenty of time to enjoy themselves. And judging by his response, it wouldn’t take long.
He raised his head, and stared at her. She whispered. “I’ve missed you, my sexy pirate.”
His gaze drifted away as if to another time. She hoped he remembered the last time she’d called him a pirate. Waiting for him to return from his memory, she tunneled her hands through his hair and dark curls danced around her fingers.
Closing his eyes, he laid his head on her chest. She continued to caress his hair while he relaxed against her.
The overpowering feelings of love wouldn’t allow her to stay quiet. “I am so glad your home. I’ve missed you so much. Please don’t ever leave me again.”
He lifted his head. “I won’t.”
His heated stare burned her. The meaning holding more than his words revealed, he offered his love.
She couldn’t hold back any longer. “I love you, Derek.”
Locked in place for several heartbeats, he suddenly shifted away and stood. “We better get going.”
Cold air hit her warm skin, chilling her to the bone. Stunned, she forced herself not to read too much into the action, and rolled to the side of the bed.
The wall around his emotions can’t be broken overnight. This is bound to happen. He's still recovering. But she’d seen a smal
l hole in the barrier and with time, it’d come tumbling down. She just needed to keep chipping at it.
She opened her suitcase and dug out her clothes. Derek stood across the room, already dressed in jeans and a black T-shirt, sliding his belt through the loops of his jeans. His gaze followed her.
Not ready to let him off the hook, Jillian decided to see if she could tempt him. With a wicked grin, she slowly lifted her cotton gown. Inching it over her body until it cleared her head then she threw it on the bed.
Ignoring him completely, she peered down at her body. Her hand on her stomach outlined the round pocket where their baby rested. She rubbed it gently, and then cupped her breasts. They were larger than she could have ever imagined. Motherhood certainly had a few added benefits. She tested their weight.
Derek groaned and gripped the waist of his jeans, his belt unfastened and his intense gaze centered on her. She offered herself to him, and his gray stare fell to the round globes in her hands.
He stepped forward, his hands curled into fists and then he stopped, held in place by some unseen force. As though caught in a cold flame, he commanded her next movements, a dance of temptation with her as his puppet.
Following his unspoken demand, her hands slid to the tip of breasts, pinched her nipples, then slid downward, to her stomach and ran along her thighs. Heat burned, her body melted, and he still didn’t move. She closed her eyes, wanting to savor the glow inside.
Then reality struck.
Shocked and embarrassed by her own brashness, Jillian turned and dressed.
He wanted her. She knew it, but for some reason his mind wouldn’t let him take what his body wanted. Did he unconsciously remember that they weren’t married?
No, she wouldn’t feel guilty about her lie. According to the state of Texas, they were married if they lived together as a married couple and proclaimed that they were married, even if they didn’t go through the ceremony.
She just needed to convince him to take what he wanted and push the limits every change she got.
Satisfied with her game plan, Jillian packed her things, anxious to leave for home.
“Would you like me to carry something down for you?” She bent to pick up a box.
“No, I’ll do it.” He touched her shoulder. “They’re all too heavy for you.”
“Not any heavier than a box of bolts.” She smiled at her joke. Derek, the perfect straight man, just stared.
“Okay, I’ll carry down my bag.” Stepping around him, she thought about what the old Derek would have said about nuts being lighter.
****
Jillian watched Jason and Derek carry boxes through the kitchen. The two appeared to be getting along. At least no harsh words were coming from either of them. Jason must have given up the idea of his brother staying in Dallas.
“How about some coffee, guys?” Kelly asked on their trip back through kitchen as they made their way back upstairs.
“We have one more load. Then everything will be packed except the weight bench.” Jason brushed his hand over Kelly’s shoulder with a gentle caress.
Jillian set the table while the other woman worked on making the scrambled eggs.
“If you’ll help make the toast, we’ll be ready to eat in a few minutes. The bread is in the refrigerator.” Kelly stirred the eggs.
“Sure thing.” Jillian worked on toasting bread while the men carried the weight bench out to the truck.
When they stepped back inside, Kelly announced, “Everything is ready. Let’s eat.”
“Great, just let us wash our hands,” Jason said.
Jillian waited for the others to join her at the table. Derek seemed more at ease this morning. Maybe yesterday he’d just been tired.
Everyone passed around the food and filled their plates. Jillian dished out some eggs and grabbed a piece of toast.
“Would you like some bacon, Jillian?” Jason offered the platter.
“No thank you.” She groaned. “The baby doesn’t seem to like it.”
“Part of morning sickness?” Kelly lifted her fork with interest.
“Yes, even though I still haven’t figured out why they call it morning sickness. It can happen any time of the day, but it is getting a little better.”
“Another reason not to have a baby, if it’s as bad as everyone claims. I don’t think I could stand it,” Kelly commented as if driving home this point to Jason.
“Yes, and you wouldn’t want to lose your wonderful figure,” he responded with a frown.
Jillian studied the couple until Derek interrupted. “When are you two getting married?”
Jason whispered something, at the same time that Kelly answered. “We haven’t set a date yet.”
“Why not?” Derek pressed.
“We’re in no hurry,” Kelly commented, while her fiancé munched down on a piece of toast.
“But why wait?”
Chapter Eleven
As the east Texas scenery flew by, Jillian wondered why Derek had grilled Jason and Kelly about their wedding. Did he think they were having problems in their relationship?
Neither had answered his questions, hedging until Derek, frustrated, had stood and stated it was time to go. He’d backed out of the driveway before she had a chance to fasten her seatbelt.
Jillian stomach rumbled as the nausea hit. She turned the air vents to point directly at her face and closed her eyes, hoping to avoid the problem. The bumpy ride of the truck didn’t help her queasiness. The world spun behind her closed lids. Needing to focus on something else, she opened her eyes and stared at him.
He’d lost weight. His cheeks were leaner, adding a more defined angle to his jawline. His dark curly hair, now longer, lent an artistic flare to his looks. She liked it. His broad shoulders flowed into strong muscular arms and ended with his square fingers. The only other noticeable change from his weight loss was a much flatter stomach.
Hers turned over, unwilling to settle down. She glanced around--the black leather seats--the clear glass windows--an exit sign for Terrell. “Derek, can we stop and get something to drink?”
“Sure, when we come to the next exit.”
Jillian sat back trying to tell her stomach to wait and felt the rumbling begin. Even with no bacon, she felt the hot bile at the back of her throat.
“Pull over. Now!”
“Okay, hold on.” He steered the truck to the side of the road.
Her hand on the door handle, she opened the door as soon as the vehicle stopped and rushed through the weeds. The uneven ground caused her to stumble. Five feet from the truck, she lost her breakfast and braced her hands on her knees to keep her from falling forward. Once finished, she drew in several deep breaths to calm her racing heart.
His hands slipped around her rib cage, pulling her back against him for support. Slowly, Jillian straightened, using his strength to reinforce her own.
She stood in the circle of his arms and turned. “I’m sorry about this.”
“You should have said something sooner.” He bent down and carried her back to the truck. With her door still open, he set her on the bench seat and studied her face.
Not sure of what he was feeling, she tried to lighten the mood. “I guess you didn’t plan on the ‘in sickness’ being so soon after the ceremony. Or maybe, I should say ‘for worse.’
“What?” He sounded confused.
“You know ‘For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health’ The marriage vows.”
His lips parted into the first true smile she’d seen from him since he’d arrived home. Her heart exploded with the joy. She cupped her hand over his cheek. “Oh Derek, I’m so glad you’re home. I have missed you so much.”
He kissed her on the forehead. “I’m glad to be here.”
He shut the door and walked around the front of the truck, then settled back in his seat. “Try to relax. I’ll stop at the next exit.”
Not having buckled her seat belt, Jillian slid to the middle of the
seat. “Do you mind if I sit next to you?” She dropped her hand onto his thigh.
“No,” he replied, pulling back on the highway.
She fastened the middle seat belt, then leaned her head against his shoulder and relaxed. Somehow just touching him made her feel better. She closed her eyes, and thought about how much he meant to her. Everything that had happened to them had only tightened the bonds between them.
He might be different than when he left, but his actions a few minutes ago proved he still cared. She would do everything she could to see that their marriage worked.
****
Tall trees surrounded each exit. A barbecue’s place sign stated the next exit was in a few miles. Jillian had told him it took about two-and-half-hours and by his calculations they should be close.
Derek thought he had the right exit and steered the truck onto the off ramp. When the truck stopped at the interchange, she stirred beside him.
“Are we there already?”
“No, we’re just on the exit ramp.”
“You mean I’ve been sleeping all this time?”
He shrugged. “Is this the right exit?”
“Yes, just turn left.” She yawned and settled back beside him. She wrapped her arms around his arm, her breasts pressing intimately against him. “I can’t believe how much I’m sleeping lately. It must be because of the pregnancy. Thank you for letting me catch a few winks.”
He placed his hand on her thigh, and inwardly groaned at the response her hug was causing. He had to control his desire for her. The last time they were together they had set each other on fire. But he didn’t want the fire to burn out. They needed to get to know each other and establish a limitless connection. If he rushed her, he might lose out in the long run.
Derek knew he’d changed since the last time he was home. The past few days in the hospital had given him plenty of time to think. The blow to his head caused his mind to play tricks on him. At one point, he had questioned his own sanity. But Jillian had been there in his thoughts, the whole time keeping him grounded to reality.
His hazy thoughts and the missing pieces of his memory were still areas of concern. But he wouldn’t let them stand in the way of his future with her. Now with the baby coming, she needed him more than ever. He’d take it slow and not rush her like he did the first time.