“You didn’t have to say it, Kate. Y’all may not know me, but I know you to the bone. At least sometimes I do. You were disappointed. I’ll go home and watch the concert and see if I can figure out what was so bad. Although I think I already know what the problem was. And I’m sorry I did something to hurt you at Cody’s. At his house I don’t have any idea what the problem was, but hurting you wasn’t intentional, I promise.”
“I know Jason. I don’t believe you would ever hurt me on purpose. Me or anyone. You are a kind, good man. Maybe it wasn’t you.” She shrugged one shoulder. “Maybe it was just the smell. Let’s don’t worry about it tonight, huh?”
He grimaced in confusion. “What about the smell? What’s up with you about the smell? I’ve never noticed Cody’s house smells.”
“You’re missing the point, Jason. I’m just trying to not offend you. Look. What you do at Cody’s, or in a concert, or anywhere is your deal, Jason. It’s not my place to judge or even comment. I’m sorry I said anything. I shouldn’t have. Please forgive me and let’s move on. We’re both tired.”
Shaking his head, he reached and touched her cheek and said quietly, “What you’re not addressing Kate, is that of all the people in the world, the only one who I truly want to like my work is you.”
She came close and looked up at him. “Then you don’t have to worry, Jase. Because I certainly love your work. You’re the most gifted man I’ve ever known. You’re inspiring and evocative and sexy and you’re a master at taking your audience anywhere you want to go. You’re a magician on that stage. You melt me. You always have and always will.”
He searched her gaze and whispered, “Then, baby, what was the problem?”
Kate hesitated at that and finally returned his intense look with a soft spoken, “Well, Jason, maybe you just need to be really careful about who you’re taking where. One of your gifts is phenomenal sensuality. It’s incredibly powerful. But it’s also like a scalpel. Life giving in the right time and place, and lethal other wise.”
For several long moments he just looked down at her as he considered what she’d said. Finally, his face broke into a grin and he shook his head. “You always say that I’m eloquent. And I may be at times. But nobody in the world can hold a candle to your way with words, Kate.” He pulled her tightly into a hug with a low chuckle. “Tonight might just be the highpoint in my entire adult life.” He chuckled again. “You just told me my phenomenal sensuality can be lethal. I couldn’t top those lyrics in a million years!”
“You knew what I meant, Jason.”
“I don’t know, Kate. I think I did. I hope I did. I’m coming to get you in the morning. I need to be with you and I’m not taking no for an answer. We have to get a handle on us. We have to. This weird tension lately is killing me. Whatever it takes, I’m going to find it and fix it, because you matter too much to me, Kate. If I have to quit singing completely to take that shadow out of your eyes, then I will. You matter ten million times more to me than a stupid band. Let alone some loud, smelly party.” He grinned again. “What time should I come? Eight? Nine? How ‘bout nine?”
Kate glanced at her watch and groaned. “Nine is perfect. But Jason. Please don’t ever threaten to quit because of me. I would never forgive myself. You were born to perform.”
His smile dampened right down and he looked at her intensely. “Do you really believe that, Kate?”
“Of course, Jason Falcon. I absolutely do.”
“Kate, do you know I have always trusted your judgment? Even when you were little? You were always so astute about everything.”
Her face fell as she attempted to admit to him, “Be careful, Jason. Not that I don’t think you’re supposed to keep performing, because I absolutely do. But don’t trust my judgment about other things right now. I’m so mixed up. Whatever channel I’m usually tuned to to hear God’s instructions to me, is completely jammed right now. I think my whole satellite tower came down in an earthquake or something. I’ll be the first to admit to not having a clue what He’s trying to tell me.”
Jason leaned down and gently put his cheek to hers. “He’s trying to tell you to hang with a certain brown haired, green eyed country singer, Katie Ree. God knows that we’re meant to be together forever. After all, He’s the one who made us. Don’t let Him down. He’s wise and you can trust that He’s all knowing and omnipotent.”
“It’s not his omnipotence I’m worried about Jason. It’s my inomnipotence.”
At that, he kissed her soundly and then reluctantly stepped back away from her and teased, “That’s not a word, Kate. I’m almost positive of it. In most cases, making up words is cheating in eloquence. However, since tonight y’all got the all time highest point earning quip known to man, I’ll let you get away with it. Just this once. I have to go now so I can rest up for my date at nine o’clock in the morning. I’m going to brush up on my power sleeping. You’d be wise to do the same. I plan to thoroughly enjoy you in the morning.” He paused as if realizing that sounded a bit questionable. “I mean, in a good way, I promise.”
Kate smiled tiredly. “I know, Jason. See you in the morning.”
Chapter 6
Nine o’clock didn’t turn out to be the optimal time after all. Kate’s flu bug had come back and she felt lousy, but she wanted to see Jason enough that she got up and got ready to go anyway. She gagged brushing her teeth again, but she made it through without worshipping the toilet and then went and dug through her mother’s medical box to see if she had anything for nausea.
She didn’t find anything, but oh well. The way this bug had been she’d probably feel fine again in half an hour anyway.
When Jason showed up on the crack of nine, he looked good. Really good. Good enough that Kate could have eaten him right up in spite of her roiling tummy. She walked beside him to the car holding his hand thinking that no man on the planet could wear a pair of jeans like he could.
He took her to breakfast at a tiny French pastry shop in Oklahoma City that was so small and private it felt like the chef’s home and they ate a leisurely, comfortable meal that left her wondering why they were struggling right now at all. At times like this, when she had the Jason back who she knew inside and out, she couldn’t see that any issue would be insurmountable. Jason was still the good, honorable, sweet man he’d always been. They could work through this whole fame thing. Of course they could.
After breakfast, they window shopped hand in hand down the side walk and from time to time went inside to poke around and buy something. Only once did someone notice Jason and say something to them and by the time he loaded her back into his black Corvette to take her home so she could go in to work, her flu was forgotten and he’d worked a miracle on the anxious knot in her stomach. It was all but gone.
That evening, she didn’t wonder about where he was for a second, because he spent a good portion of it sitting in the chair across from her desk leafing through car brochures while she worked and came in and out. He went home during the dinner rush but then was back at her mom’s house sitting on the porch step when she drove in at a little after ten.
He got up as she climbed out of her car and once again, he looked every bit as good as he had that morning. It was no wonder he was becoming a star. He was smokin’ hot and had an incredibly sensuous way of approaching her. He gathered her to him in a sweet, tight hug and his aftershave made her tired body nearly melt as he held her. Yeah, today, he was definitely her old, adorable Jason.
***
Jason knew Kate was aware he had to leave Friday morning for a gig that night in Fort Worth, because she had been the one to make all of the arrangements, but they weren’t talking about it. Not at all. Not either one of them.
He’d been with her every spare moment all week and had just about come to the conclusion that if he could just help her to see him the way she always had, even if he did make it big in the music world, she’d be able to deal with all of this a little better.
Scheduling everything e
lse around her had disgusted the other members of the band some because most of them wanted to sleep all morning and hang out all night, but it was his band. His and Cody’s, who was definitely on board with keeping Kate happy. And frankly, Jason didn’t give a rip about pleasing anyone else but Kate anyway.
He wasn’t sure why he felt like it, but for some reason, he knew that things going well between the two of them right now was hyper important. He would have never believed it before, but for the first time in his adult life, he worried about Kate leaving him. When he thought about it, that seemed so ridiculous, but when he didn’t think about it… When he just felt about it, it scared him to the soles of his Justin boots. He couldn’t even imagine coping with losing Kate. It was unthinkable. Unthinkable, but for some reason lately, a possibility that left him sick just at the thought.
The band had been invited to open for Tim McGraw several times and its popularity had grown astronomically in the last couple of months. Kate had been instrumental in orchestrating all of that, but the resulting “glitz” had her reeling and he knew it, even if she didn’t seem to be able to face it openly. He didn’t think she was afraid of the money, or the fame, or the crowds, or the travel, or the groupies, or anything alone. But put all of them together and it intimidated the daylights out of her.
It would probably be better if she would agree to travel with them. At some point she’d become hardened to a lot of it just like he and the guys had. But she hardly ever came with them anymore. Almost to the point that it offended him, in fact. Even when the gigs were relatively close and in a venue that she could get into legally, she was hesitant to come lately for some reason. If he didn’t know that she loved nothing more than for him to play and sing for her, he would have wondered what to think about her growing aversion to his concerts.
She loved to come and watch them practice. It didn’t matter how many times they went over things or worked through certain sections and moves. She loved watching them and made no bones about it. That made her funny worries seem all the more silly. But she felt what she felt and he had to deal with it as well as he could because nothing was more important to him than her happiness.
Cody was the same. Probably for different reasons. Cody wanted Kate happy because Cody wanted Jason happy and they went hand in hand. Not only that, but Cody knew just what Kate had done for the band on the business end of things and he was protecting her as the asset she was and the treasure she was. The others might not have realized it, but a lot of things would come to a screeching halt for them professionally if Kate wasn’t working her miracles on the office end.
Kate had actually become a small problem for the band in one way. Ryan the piano player had begun to be irritatingly enamored with her and if he didn’t straighten up and quick, Jason was going to fire his butt out of here, whether he was a gifted keyboardist or not. Even now, thinking about it as he waited for her to get off work again on the night before they had to pull out, it ticked him off. Who did the guy think he was, anyway? Jason rolled down his car window on this sultry, Oklahoma night to cool off. The idea of another man hustling Kate made him positively hot under the collar, literally.
At nearly ten she finally emerged from the back door of the restaurant and Jason got out and came around to open her door for her. She ignored the open door and came to him and wrapped her arms around him tightly and he breathed in the scent of her hair as he held her back. Man, she just exactly fit against him. Hugging her like this was his all time best thing. That hug lasted and he knew again that even though she wasn’t talking about it, she was thinking about him having to leave in the morning.
When she finally pulled back, she looked up at him there in the dimly lit parking lot and he leaned down to kiss her. He’d just been going to give her a quick kiss, but there was some intensity about her tonight that turned it into several moments of kissing each other almost desperately. At length, he let her mouth free with a low groan and buried his face in her sweet smelling, soft, dark curls. Leaving her tomorrow was going to be awful again.
Friday morning, he stopped by her house to talk to her before going to meet the others. The band was driving this time and he wanted to be able to tell her goodbye without anyone else watching. It was only eight o’clock in the morning and she didn’t look so good when she opened the door to him. All week long she’d worried about kissing him and giving him her bug, but after he kept insisting that he’d rather be sick than unkissed she’d finally let it rest and gone back to her old sweet habit of being marvelously affectionate.
He stepped inside and laughed at her, although even looking a little green around the gills and with dark circles, she still looked sexy as all get out, sleepy and tousled as she was. There was something about her when she was like this that made him want to about eat her up. He would have too, if she hadn’t felt so lousy.
Ruffling her hair, he laughed once more. “Not feeling so hot again, babe?”
She shook her head with a guilty smile. “Sorry. I’ll kick this thing while you’re gone. I’m sure of it.”
He came close and gently kissed her and teased huskily, “You may not feel so hot, but you look hotter than a pistol. I’m thinking I should stay in town and kiss you until you’re all better. Or at least until you forget you don’t feel well.”
She smiled again and snuggled up to his chest and he led her inside to the couch and pulled her onto his lap. “Lean on me and maybe you’ll feel less queasy.” As she laid her head against his chest with a sigh, he wished he could stay and hold her until she was a hundred percent. It was heavenly to hold her and it was so not like her not to be energetic and busy.
They sat like that, silently, neither of them willing to talk about him going. Finally, he sighed and she turned her face to him and he kissed her as gently as if she was glass. “I love you, Kate. I’ll miss you. Think about me this week end?”
She touched his mouth with a soft fingertip and whispered, “You know I will. Be safe.”
“You too.”
She nodded and as she moved to sit up, he gently pushed her off and stood up and took her hand as they walked to the door. Standing in front of it, he wrapped her tightly in a hug and kissed her passionately and then reluctantly pulled away. “I have to go.”
“I know.” She pushed on him and he leaned and kissed her one more time fiercely.
“I’ll come back to you, Kate.”
She nodded, blinking back bright tears. “Go. Before I cry and depress you.” She smiled and pushed on him again.
He stood looking down at her, trying to memorize her face for this long week end. He gave her one more fast kiss and then went out the door. Man, he wished she would come with. It was getting harder and harder to leave her.
When he was gone, Kate pushed the hair off of her forehead and rubbed it with the back of her hand. She wished she hadn’t looked so awful this morning, but she honestly hadn’t felt up to dolling up. She glanced at her watch and went and climbed back into bed. This morning even her chest was sore.
She turned onto her tummy and then rolled onto her back. Her chest was too sore right now to sleep on. She was so sick of feeling sick. This thing was hanging on forever. It had been almost a week and a half. The stomach flu never lasted that long, did it? She lifted her head and pulled her curls up off of her neck. Just as long as she felt better by the time Jason got home on Sunday night. She wanted to look and feel better by then. He only had two days before he had to leave again and she wanted to make the most of them.
Chapter 7
On Sunday morning, when she woke up in the wee hours before it was light out, still horrendously nauseated and without a sign of a period yet, she got up and went to her purse and took our her little day planner. The persistent, frightening thought that had been bothering her for days now could no longer be ignored. Something was dreadfully wrong with her and she had an incredibly sobering suspicion that it wasn’t really the flu.
Counting the days since her last period, her h
eart began to nearly pound itself out of her chest when she confirmed that her period was thirteen days later than usual. She looked down at her breasts that were stretching the lycra of her cammy more than they ever had and gingerly touched the cleavage that was painfully full for some reason. She put a hand on her pretty, flat belly and felt that now familiar rock of anxiousness turn into a full fledged boulder. She couldn’t be. Could she? Glancing back to her planner, she calculated what night it was that she and Jason had messed up so badly. It had been exactly four weeks and one day ago. She sank down onto her bed in absolute shock. Oh, what had they done? What on earth had they done?
Two hours later, as she heard her mother beginning to stir, she quietly let herself out the back door and got into her car. She couldn’t face her parents. Not yet. And she needed to do an errand anyway.
She drove all the way into the suburbs of Purcell before stopping at a large market for one of those early home pregnancy test kits. Embarrassed to be buying only it, she added some fruit and bread to her basket and then went to the check out, her heart still in her throat because of her suspicions.
Back in her car, she decided she wasn’t going to wait until she got home and stopped at a gas station. While she filled her tank, she slipped into the rest room and used the tiny boxed kit that held her very life in its small wand. The few minutes it took felt like an eternity and she waited inside the restroom stall trying to breathe evenly with a million thoughts going through her head.
With the appearance of that one, small word pregnant across the wand she felt the blood drain from her head and wondered if she was going to be sick again. That revelation stopped every thought in its tracks and she sat down on the toilet seat and leaned her head on the metal stall wall beside her, fearing she was going to pass out. She’d suspected this, but the confirmation of her fears was almost too much to wrap her brain around. A baby! Oh, what had they done?
Falcon Song: A love story Page 7