Chapter 10
For the first time in his life, Jason Falcon smashed an expensive guitar. It wasn’t some orchestrated stage trick to send the fans over the edge. It was something to keep him from smashing the new keyboard player who had joked about how everyone in the room was already taken for the night and then assumed Kate was just another groupie. First, he had just handed Jason his beer to hold while he answered the door. Then he had falsely accused Jason of sleeping around, and then he had actually thought Kate would agree to be with him! Jason cursed and kicked the remains of the guitar as he thought about it.
At the unaccustomed raging temper, the room cleared out remarkably fast, save for Cody and Jason sent the door crashing into the frame behind them. He stalked to the window and rested his hands on the sill as he ground out through gritted teeth, “Send him packing before I strangle him.”
Cody hesitated, “Hadn’t we better keep him long enough to get through Modesto and Vegas?”
Jason turned around violently. “You want me to share a stage with that… With him after what he just did? Did you see her face?”
Calmly, Cody said, “I want you to be adult enough to honor our commitment to perform. And it wasn’t what Chauncy said that did it, and you know it. I tried to tell you, Jason. You have to quit draping yourself around whoever. It may seem like nothing when it’s just us being loud and celebrating, but Kate is worth toeing the line for. Think how you’d feel if she acted the same around a bunch of salivating guys.”
“Oh, you’re a fine one to talk! You sleep with girls who you don’t even know their names. I put my arm around her shoulder!”
Cody didn’t answer that and after Jason glared at him for another second, he went and kicked the mangled guitar again, making a discordant jangle that reverberated through the tense room. Finally, Cody asked, “What’d she say?”
Jason snarled at him, “What do you think she said? She said sianara! She thought the beer was mine too! She wouldn’t even listen for a second!”
“Calm down Jason. You’re gonna get us thrown out of this joint if you don’t quit yelling. Give her a minute to think about things and then call her cell phone. Find out where she’s staying and go talk to her. She’s no hot head. She’ll hear your end of the story.”
Jason thought about that and then swore viciously and stalked over to the window again. Cody hadn’t seen her face. He looked up at the sky and let out a huge breath. She was long gone. And it wasn’t like she would take a drive to Texas to talk to God this time.
“What’d she want?”
Jason pulled his thoughts back to Cody. “What?”
“What’d she want? She just drove six hours because she wanted to talk to you. What’d she want to talk about? These concerts intimidate the hell out of her. It must have been important.”
Jason closed his eyes and felt like he wanted to throw up. Had she finally decided she could marry him in spite of her concerns about all the other flavors? He swore bitterly. He had a sneaking suspicion that whether Kate was a hot head or not, his asinine habit of being too physically friendly had just cost him big. Huge. He didn’t even want to think how huge.
He kept his eyes closed long enough to pray like he’d never prayed before and then opened them and said, “Go away Cody. Go find a trashy girl. I just want to be alone.”
Cody walked quietly to the door and then turned back and asked, “Y’all want me to boot Chaunc? Or not?”
Jason shook his head and sighed. “No. You’re right. We need him for a couple days. Ask Scotty to check with that Quinn and see if he could be up to speed next week. If he can, we’ll lose Chauncy then.”
Cody paused for another minute and then asked gently, “I don’t need to worry about you not showing up to meet our plane in the morning, do I?”
Turning back to the window, Jason said sadly, “I’ve never let you down before, have I Rawlings?”
Cody smiled. “Well, there was that one time in first grade when I caught you playing with Shelley Larsen’s Barbies. That was a real eye opener.”
Jason didn’t even crack a smile and Cody turned back to the door as he said, “Hey, off the record, I’m going to pray for the two of you again tonight, okay.”
Jason nodded. “Thanks. Your secret’s safe with me.”
Cody went out and let the door close behind him.
***
Even though she was sicker than a dog, the next morning Kate got up, prayed for inspiration and climbed back into her car to finish driving home. As she drove, she listened for the confirmation that her plans were what the Lord thought best for her, and when she knew that walking away from Jason was what she was truly supposed to do; her heart broke all over again.
Once she’d gotten the emotion under control one more time, she began to unravel the logistics of what she needed to be doing in her life. She’d brought the note pad off the hotel room’s desk and as she traveled, she made a list of all the things that had to be taken care of before Jason got home.
Knowing it was going to happen sooner or later, she called Maxine and asked her to plan to fill in for her for the rest of the day. Kate had done nothing, but drive and cry, but she was unspeakably tired any way.
When she finally pulled into her parents’ driveway, she simply sat in the car for several long minutes. She dreaded going in and talking to her parents, and frankly, she was too beat to get out of the driver’s seat.
Her mom knew when she opened the door and walked into the kitchen that something was horribly wrong and she took Kate’s bag for her and followed her into her suite of rooms and then just stood there, waiting quietly. Kate looked at her for a few seconds and then turned away to hide the tears that welled again, but her mother followed her into her room and then took a seat in Kate’s big recliner when Kate dropped onto her bed and turned her face to the wall.
A couple of minutes later, Kate got back up and came and climbed right onto her mom’s lap and laid her head on her shoulder and as her mom rocked her like she had when she was two years old, she tearfully told her what had happened on her road trip. By the time she was finished, her mother was teary eyed as well.
Finally, Kate told her she intended to move away and what her reasoning was. Her mother’s face twisted in sadness as she listened and Kate felt terrible about bailing on them like she was, but she knew it was best. Her mother must have either understood and agreed, or else considered that trying to counsel Kate any different would be hopeless, because the only thing she said was, “Kate, if you really intend to hide this child from Jason, do you realize this means staying away from home for years and years?”
Kate sobbed bitterly as she nodded her head.
They talked for over an hour and then her mom left to go call her sister Kiersten and ask her to come visit Kate at home one last time and Kate fell into an exhausted, troubled sleep. That was Thursday.
At one o’clock on Friday afternoon, Kate pulled into a Holiday Inn Express on the outskirts of Dallas with everything she owned in the back seat of her car and a handful of resumes and letters of recommendation in the front. She called her mother on the new cell phone she’d bought so she could let her old number go and let her know she’d arrived safely. After she checked in, she brought in her purse, lap top, and an over night bag, pulled the blinds and climbed into the slick white sheets of the queen sized bed. Sadness, lack of sleep and morning sickness had completely drained her.
Toward evening, she got up and went to dinner and then went right back and slept until ten the next morning. Even then she didn’t want to get up, but she did anyway. As tired as she was, her sleep was hopelessly broken by what had taken place in her life over the previous few days. Then each time, she’d cry herself back to sleep. Why did he have to turn out so undependable when he’d always been her foundation? She really missed Jason.
And it wasn’t just that she missed Jason. She missed everything. Telling her own parents and sister goodbye had been bad, but she knew she’d be able to s
ee them again from time to time. Trying to bid farewell to Jason’s parents without letting them know that was what she was doing had been one of the hardest things she’d ever done and she’d cried on and off again for nearly a hundred miles.
They’d chosen Dallas because although it was definitely far enough away and large enough that she could lose herself there, it was still close enough that she could be checked on and helped in case of an emergency. The fact that she would be delivering a baby in less than seven months figured into that decision as well. Deciding to lose herself was one thing. Labor by herself was another.
Only her parents and sister knew where she would be and the only other people who even knew she’d gone were the two assistant managers who would be taking over with Kiersten to manage the restaurant. Knowing that Jason would try to find her, and also knowing their relationship had to end, Kate had made her mom and sister promise her they’d never tell anyone where she was without her permission.
If Jason got ugly about finding her, he could do it. He now had the funds to hire whatever help he’d need. But Kate didn’t think he’d do that. Her leaving would have given him a clear enough message that things were over that she assumed he’d leave her alone just because she’d asked him to. The fact that they both still loved each other and wanted what was best for each other had certainly come into play here. It was funny, but even though Kate had left Jason, taking his unborn child with her, Jason was still the first person she prayed for several times a day.
She got up and showered and put on a business suit and started right in making applications and placing resumes in a number of the nicest restaurants in the greater Dallas area. Applying to work in a restaurant was one of the few places she could realistically job hunt on a Saturday. She was hoping the glowing recommendations she had from both professors and some of her parents’ fellow restaurant owners who were well acquainted with Kate and her abilities, would open some doors so she could find a job relatively quickly.
It wasn’t that she was desperate for money. She wasn’t. The restaurant at home had been lucrative and her parents had paid her well. It was that she knew that taking a few needed days rest would get old in a hurry and without any local friends or church activities; she’d be left with nothing to do but watch TV and miss Jason and home if she didn’t throw herself into something. Not only that, but she was used to going ninety miles an hour between the restaurant, the band’s stuff and her church activities. She definitely needed to get some things going here in Dallas quickly.
Her plan was to find out where she’d be working, and then find housing as comfortably close to there as possible, so she intended to live out of the hotel for the time being. With that in mind, when she was through looking for a job Saturday evening, she brought in another supply of clothing and her toiletries and then set herself up an office at the desk in her room.
She changed out of her business clothes, curled up on the bed and for the first time since she had gone to Lubbock, she turned on her old phone. The one loose end that hadn’t been tied up was to tell Scotty, the manager she’d hired for Aerie, that she was through and he needed to take over completely. It made her feel like she was slitting her own wrists. It was the last tie to Jason. Well, except that she was having his baby. Quitting working for the band was the last real tie and she needed to cut it. It had to be done. To do that, she needed to use her old phone.
When the familiar uncomfortable anxiousness in the pit of her stomach made an appearance as she was waiting for the phone to come on, she realized for sure that her decision to leave had certainly been the right one. She hadn’t even realized until the anxiety had come back that it had disappeared when she’d finally made the split.
It was definitely back; at least while she made this phone call, and she tried to keep herself from holding her breath as she waited. When it finally came all the way on, there were thirteen new messages and eleven of them were from Jason.
Just the sight of his number there made her heart bleed and she quickly changed screens, scrolled down to Scotty’s number and pushed send.
He picked up on the third ring. “Hi, Kate. How’s things?”
She swallowed and said, “Fine thanks. And you?”
“I’m great. Well, other than dealing with having to find that second new keyboard player, but then I guess you know about that. Hey, you’ve been missing in action. Where are you?”
“I’m actually out of town. Listen, Scotty. I need you to do me a couple of favors. Could you plan to wholly take over making arrangements for the band for a bit? I’m thinking about going on sabbatical for a little while.”
His voice sounded wary on the other end as he replied hesitantly, “Well, yeah, I could help out, but Jason and Cody aren’t going to like that. They always insist I run everything past you before I confirm. How long are you thinking?”
She evaded that question. “I’m not exactly sure. I’ll call you and let you know when I’ll come back on board. For now, just use your own judgment or ask Jason and Cody. Oh, and I left a folder for you with Jason’s mom. You’ll need to pick it up before Wednesday. It has their plane tickets and itineraries in it. Thanks for filling in for me, Scott.”
“No, problem. Hey, Jason’s been trying to find you. Have you talked to him?”
“No. I’ll see about giving him a call. Thanks, Scotty. Take care.”
“I will. Hey, call Jason like right away. Whatever he needs, it must be pretty urgent. See ya.”
“Bye now.” She pushed end the final time and then swallowed the huge lump in her throat and powered the phone back down with a sad, teary sigh as she whispered, “Goodbye, Jason.”
Chapter 11
Jason’s plane touched down in Oklahoma City and he was almost the first one off, even though that wasn’t very polite, but for once he didn’t particularly care. He needed to get home.
He still hadn’t been able to reach Kate, and so it was his mom who had come to pick him up.
He came out the doors of the terminal and was glad to see she was pulled right up at the curb directly in front of him. As she popped the trunk, he tossed his bags into it and then came to the driver’s side door and opened it. “Thanks for coming, Mom. Do you mind if I drive home?”
“No, honey. Be my guest. But are you sure? You look exhausted.”
“I’m fine. I’ll drive.” She would never drive as fast as he wanted to go. He walked around the car and helped her back in and then jumped back in behind the wheel and dug out for Wye.
He didn’t say much and his mom didn’t either as they pulled around and through the airport exits. She was looking at him across the car and finally, she said, “Jason, I’m not sure what’s going on, but Kate came by a couple days ago to see your dad and me. It was Friday I believe. It was really weird. She didn’t need anything. Didn’t really even say anything. Just small talked, left a folder full of some papers and then hugged us both and left. Both of us thought it was a little strange. And she didn’t smile once. Isn’t that unusual?”
Trying to appear nonchalant, he asked, “That she came by or that she didn’t smile?”
“Well, either. She’s never acted like that before. Is she okay?”
“I don’t know, Mom. I haven’t seen her for a few days. I’ll check on her as soon as we get home. How’s Dad?”
“Oh, he’s fine. He’s golfing today. How was your trip?”
Wondering whether to tell her the truth or just be casual, he said, “Oh, it wasn’t too bad. Busy. Hectic. You know how it goes.” Disastrous. That’s what he should have said.
She went on, small talking about this or that as they drove and he managed to conceal the fact that he’d never been so anxious in his life. The rest of the band wouldn’t even be home until tomorrow, but he’d been too uptight to wait one more night and had bought another ticket and come home to find out why Kate wouldn’t so much as even turn her phone on to take a call from him. Surely she wouldn’t really let a simple beer bottle and displ
ay of affection affect the friendship that had lasted a lifetime. He kept telling himself that over and over, but then he’d remember her face in Lubbock. In all honesty, he didn’t know what he’d find when he knocked on her door this morning.
Her car wasn’t in her parents’ driveway when he drove by, even though it was only seven in the morning and he wondered if she had already gone into work for some reason. He drove there next, but the lot was empty and he pulled his car to the curb to figure out where to try next, struggling to squelch the rising panic in his chest.
Even though he looked like he’d been up all night in a series of airports, he drove back to her parents’ house and knocked on the door. Laura answered, still in her robe and Jason felt bad for having obviously woken her up. She gave him a tired smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes and said, “Jason, I didn’t think you’d be back in town yet. Come on in.”
He came in the door and looked around hopefully. Maybe Kate’s car was just at the shop or something. “I’m sorry to visit so early, but I haven’t been able to reach Kate and I’m worried. Is she here? I didn’t see her car outside.”
Laura’s eyes darkened and Jason was appalled to see them fill with tears as she shook her head. “No, Jason.” He waited anxiously while she struggled to get control of her emotions. Finally, she said, “I’m sorry, Jason, but Kate has moved.”
“Moved! What do you mean?”
Laura shook her head and the tears began to course down her cheeks. “She left, Jason. She’s gone.”
He came and took her by the shoulders. “Laura, what do you mean? She’s the queen of Birches have roots. She never even moved out to go off to college. She’s lived in this house since the day she was born.”
Nodding, Laura continued to cry softly and she looked up into his eyes with both sadness and pity. “She came home Thursday pretty upset and told me she was leaving.” Laura shrugged her shoulders and went on, “She slept most of that day and then packed up her car. Friday morning, she went next door to talk to your parents for a bit and drove away.”
Falcon Song: A love story Page 11