Tyler skimmed the article, but there was no mention made of the McKennas or the Moon Dancer. Instead, the article focused on a boat that had capsized, losing all but one of her entire crew to the raging sea. Turning the page, he found more reports on the storm, quotes from some of the sailors.
"The winds were screaming. It was a scene from hell."
"The waves were three stories high. I couldn't tell if I was on the boat or in the water."
"There were Maydays and distress calls everywhere. Flares popping up all over the place, like the Fourth of July. We were no longer racing. We were simply trying to survive."
Tyler wanted a quote from one of the McKennas. He wanted to know what they had been thinking, what they had been feeling. It sounded terrifying. Certainly something that could bring on a water phobia, maybe even a need to drink, he thought, his mind turning to Caroline and to Duncan. But what about Kate? She didn't have any noticeable vices or inconsistencies. Had the storm or the race itself affected her in some way? He'd have to find out. Mark was counting on him.
He wondered if Kate had somehow connected him to Mark. It seemed unlikely; they didn't share the same last name since Mark's stepfather had adopted him. But she'd obviously been on the Internet. What else had she come up with?
Tyler shook his head. Too many questions, not enough answers. The second notebook focused on the end of the race. There were photos taken of the Moon Dancer's arrival in Castleton, most of which he'd seen before.
It occurred to him that a week had passed between the official end of the race and the McKennas return to Castleton. It must have been a strange few days, anticlimactic for sure, but what else? Had the McKennas simply sailed home, gotten off their boat, and said good-bye to sailing forever? According to Kate, that was the scenario. He studied the girls' faces as they waved from the deck of the boat. They looked weathered, exhausted, and completely overwhelmed. He supposed those were natural responses to a race that had gone on for eleven long months. But he knew something else had happened during those eleven months, something no one wanted to talk about.
Turning the page, he found a photo of Ashley and a young man. The caption: Sean Amberson welcomes home high school sweetheart, Ashley McKenna.
Amberson? Wasn't that the name of one of the men lost at sea?
Tyler flipped back to the article on the storm, tracing the names of the five sailors lost with his finger. The final name was Jeremy Amberson. The brother of Ashley's boyfriend? That was an interesting connection. Sean Amberson sounded like someone who might have insight into the McKenna family, especially Ashley. If he couldn't get answers from the McKenna sisters, maybe he could get them from their friends.
Chapter Five
"Ready?" Kate asked, watching Ashley take a deep breath before boarding the sailboat. "They're waiting for you."
"Thanks for coming with me. I know you should be at work," Ashley said.
"It's fine. Theresa handles the store as well as I do. Although I hate to admit that. You know me, control freak to the end."
Ashley nodded, but Kate could tell her sister wasn't listening. Her mind was wrestling with the task ahead of her. It saddened Kate to see her once-courageous sister battling simple and often imagined fears. At one time, Ashley had been so decisive, so eager to explore the unknown. Now there always seemed to be a battle going on between mind and body, between right and wrong, truth and lies.
"Here I go." Ashley squared her shoulders and lifted her chin. She called to one of the crew that she was coming aboard. An eager male came to assist her, stretching out a strong, secure hand for Ashley to take. And she did, stepping onto the boat with just a bit of a stumble.
Kate watched while Ashley went into photographer mode. With the camera in her hand and the vast expanse of water at her back, she seemed able to keep the fear at bay as she instructed them on where to stand and where to look.
While Ashley took care of business, Kate looked around. It was a beautiful day. The stormy night had blown away all the dust, leaving the sky a bright, brilliant blue, and the water glistened like diamonds in the sunlight. There were colors everywhere, from the sails on the boats to the multicolored roses in planters along the waterfront that gave Rose Harbor its name. There was excitement in the air, too. The slips were filling up with boats, the local bars teeming with racers looking for crews.
For a moment, Kate felt a strange sense of yearning that she didn't begin to understand. She'd turned her back on this world a long time ago. And she didn't regret it. She didn't miss the life she'd led. Not for a second. She knew how quickly the magic could go, the wind could change, the race could turn from one of friendly competition to cutthroat obsession. Out in the middle of the ocean anything could happen. The sea could swallow up a boat without anyone knowing. People could disappear.
Kate turned her back on the water and tried to quell the sudden nausea in her stomach. She shouldn't have come down here. She should have stayed safe at home or in the bookstore. God, she was getting as bad as Ashley.
"Kate?"
"Sean," Kate murmured in surprise as he approached. "Ashley said you were back." She slipped her hands in the pockets of her slacks. She always felt awkward around Sean, especially since he'd grown into a man, a man who reminded her of Jeremy.
"What are you doing down here?" he asked.
"I came along with Ashley." Kate tipped her head in Ashley's direction.
He nodded with a pleased smile. "Ah, she got on the boat. I guess the sun brought out her courage."
Kate looked away. His brown eyes were too familiar.
"It's all right. I know I remind you of my brother," he said quietly. "I figure that's why you avoid me."
"I don't mean to," she said, forcing herself to meet his gaze.
"It's just easier if I'm not around."
"Ashley said you came back to race in the Castleton."
"I thought it was about time. So many of these racers remind me of Jeremy, young, reckless, willing to sign on with anyone to go anywhere. Do you remember the first Castleton that Jeremy sailed in?"
"I --I don't know."
"He was fourteen, but he lied and said he was eighteen. By the time my parents found out, he was halfway across Puget Sound. He was fearless. I admired him so much."
"Why are you racing now, Sean?" she asked, searching his eyes for the answer, but she couldn't find one. "Why would you want to do the one thing that will hurt your family even more?"
He thought for a moment. "Because I need to know. I need to feel what Jeremy felt. I don't think I can let him go until I know what he went through, what he experienced, what he saw. I've never been more than a couple of miles offshore. I can't imagine what it would feel like to be two or three days from land."
"It feels lonely and scary. Everything is bigger than you are -- the waves, the wind, the sky. I've never felt so helpless, so vulnerable."
"That's not the way Jeremy described it. He talked about how fast the boat rode the waves, how the wind sounded like a song, and how the spray in his face made him feel alive."
Sean's words, actually Jeremy's words, stole the breath from her chest. She remembered Jeremy saying the same things to her. She could still feel the breeze on her neck as his arms crept around her waist and his whispered words ran through her mind, 'The wind is playing our song, Kate, listen."
"I have to go," Kate said quickly. Her sister seemed fine now, and she really didn't want to continue this conversation with Sean. "Could you tell Ashley that I needed to get back to the bookstore?"
"You don't have to run away, Kate. I'll leave."
"It's not you."
"Sure it is. You don't like to talk about Jeremy. No one does." A hint of pain flashed through his eyes. "My father hasn't mentioned his name in years. Sometimes I catch my mother looking at a photo, but as soon as I come in, she hides it away. Maybe that's why I can't let my brother go."
"It's been a long time, Sean."
"I know. Every year I think I'll move
on. But changing locations hasn't helped. I've been in more cities than I can count in the last few years. The only place I haven't gone is the middle of the ocean, the place where Jeremy died."
"There aren't any answers out there. There aren't any answers anywhere."
"I know it was an accident, a risk Jeremy was willing to take to do the one thing he loved most. I've heard it all, Kate. But, dammit, it still doesn't make it easier." He ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "I can't let go. Believe me, I've tried."
Kate wished she had an answer for him, and as she watched Sean's gaze turn to Ashley, she realized that he hadn't let go of Ashley either. There was a naked need on his face that made her ache for him.
"I'm sorry," she murmured.
"You don't have anything to apologize for. It's my problem. I'll deal with it." He walked away with a brisk, impatient stride, as if he were sorry he'd stopped at all and wanted to get away as quickly as possible.
Ashley stepped back on to the dock and rejoined Kate. "I'm done," she said, with a relieved sigh. "I did it."
Kate smiled, happy to see how proud Ashley was of herself. She'd battled one demon and won. "I knew you could."
"Was that Sean I saw?"
"Yeah."
"He looked mad."
"He is mad, and by that I mean crazy. Wanting to race in the Castleton, wanting to follow in Jeremy's footsteps. His parents must be beside themselves. I hope he changes his mind. It's not going to solve or change anything. It certainly won't bring Jeremy back." She paused, giving Ashley a thoughtful look. "He's still in love with you, Ash."
"No, he's not," Ashley said immediately. "He told me he has lots of girlfriends."
"Yeah, that's why he's here alone and wanting to sail to the edge of the world."
"We don't even know each other anymore. Aside from last night's short conversation, it's been years since we talked, spent time together. It's over. And I don't want to talk about him."
"Okay. I have to get to work, anyway."
"Why now?" Ashley asked abruptly.
"Because I've been gone half the day."
"Not work. I mean, why now, why is the reporter here? Why is Sean wanting to crew? Wanting to follow in Jeremy's footsteps? What happened, Kate? Why is it all coming back now?"
She met her sister's questioning gaze. "I wish I knew. Just when you think it's safe to go back into the water ..." she wisecracked.
"Hush. You know that movie gave me nightmares for weeks."
"Not me. Out on the open sea, the sharks were only one of our worries."
* * *
Kate was reminded of sharks a few hours later when Tyler walked into her bookstore just before closing time. He'd pulled a dark blue sweater over his polo shirt, which should have made him look casual and friendly. But the way he moved, the way he looked at her, reminded her of the sharks that had circled their boat from time to time. They'd come close, then disappear, then pop up again. You could never be truly sure they were gone. You could never be truly sure that they wouldn't attack even if they weren't provoked. She'd learned to respect the sharks as much as she'd respected the sea. She didn't want to respect Tyler, but she had a feeling it would be even worse to underestimate him.
"I'm back," Tyler said, a challenging glint in his eyes as he approached the counter.
"I figured you would be." Kate fiddled with a stack of flyers. "So what do you want now?"
"The pleasure of your company."
"Yeah, right. You have more questions."
"A few."
"Maybe I could find you something more interesting to write about than my family," she suggested, searching her brain for an idea.
"Okay, shoot. What have you got?"
"Micky Davis said he saw a mermaid off the coast of Florida last year."
"After how many drinks?" he challenged. "Nice try, but I don't do alien stories."
Kate thought for another moment. "The owner of the Sally McGee, that's the racing yacht that came in third in our race, just got married for the sixth time, and, get this, the first wife, the third wife, and the sixth wife are all named Sally."
Tyler grinned. "You just made that up."
"I didn't. I swear. He said Sally was a lucky name for him."
"Not if he was married six times."
She smiled back at him. "Good point."
"Tell me about the storm," he said abruptly.
She stiffened. "Last night's storm? Well, I think we got about a half inch of rain."
"You know what storm I mean, the one that almost sent your entire race fleet to the bottom of the sea."
"Why do you want to know about that?"
"Because I do."
"Well," she thought for a moment. "It was terrifying. Huge waves, monster winds. I can't describe it. It was like a freight train bearing down on us. But we battled, and we came through. There's really nothing else to say." Or, at least anything else she wanted to say.
"Did anyone get hurt?"
"Just bumps and bruises, that sort of thing."
"What would you have done out there in the middle of the ocean if someone had been injured?"
"We had a good first aid kit. Dad knew the basics, or at least enough to keep anyone stable until port could be reached."
"Quite a man, your father. And you, too. I'm still baffled as to how three young girls could handle a boat of that size. You're not exactly built like an Amazon."
"My sisters and I were good sailors. We learned to sail the same time we learned to walk. It was second nature to us. Some jobs required more strength than others, but we were extremely fit. My father insisted on fitness even when we were small children. Some kids got bedtime stories, but we got personal training -- sit-ups, push-ups, leg lifts, weights."
"Sounds like a slave driver."
"Well, he did tell us a few stories while we were working out."
"Stories about what?"
"Sailing, of course. They were always tales that involved great courage, determination, physical, and mental strength. They were meant to inspire us. My father taught us how to use our minds and our bodies to make things happen that seemed impossible. And that's exactly what we did when we raced, we accomplished the impossible."
"Is that a note of admiration in your voice?"
She sighed, wishing she could say no. "I think it might be."
Tyler studied her thoughtfully. "You and your father have a complicated relationship, don't you?"
"That's an understatement."
"And no one in the family races anymore. I can't help but wonder why."
"We lived a lifetime in those eleven months, Tyler, not to mention the two years of sailing that came before the race. It was enough."
"That's the first time you've called me Tyler." He tilted his head. "I think I like it. Makes it seem like we're getting along."
"Well, I wouldn't get carried away unless I start calling you Ty."
"I'll keep that in mind. Now, how about some dinner?"
Kate immediately shook her head. It was hard enough to get through five minutes of conversation with him. She certainly couldn't do dinner. "No."
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