by Cari Hislop
“You’d murder your wife?”
“Of course not Marshall; she’ll fall down the stairs or die in a carriage accident. The wrong kind of mushrooms stuffed in a chicken breast drank with a glass of wine would accomplish the end nicely.”
“You wouldn’t really kill a wife and innocent babes, would you?”
“Why should I allow some other man’s bastard to inherit my name and money? Cuckolds who endure the insult aren’t worth the air they breathe.”
Marshall felt a cold chill in his stomach, “There’s nothing amusing about killing women and children. You shouldn’t joke about such things Henry.”
“No I don’t suppose I should… What? You don’t think I’d really kill a wife and her offspring on the chance she shared her favours do you? You’ve spent too much time reading poetry Marshall. So the good Lady Raynham is winding you around one of her bobbins is she? Be careful she doesn’t make lace out of your heart strings.”
“What is that supposed to mean? Merry isn’t some money hungry debutante.”
“No, she’s merely a hungry vicar’s daughter who’d do anything for food.”
“My wife is a good woman. You should be careful your cynical heartstrings don’t wrap around your throat and choke you in your sleep.”
“Temper, temper…there’s no reason to rail at me Marshall. I’m merely voicing concerns for your well-being.”
“Sometimes I want to hit you, just to remove that stupid smug expression.”
“Violence is so mindless, almost as mindless as expecting a caged bird not to sing for her supper. How will you ever know that your merry wife really loves you and not her three meals a day if you don’t first set her free? Now if you set her free and she still returns to your cage then you’ll know it’s you she wants and not your food.”
Marshall’s heart slumped, “I’m not going to annul my marriage and then beg my wife to remarry me.”
“Where is your vision? Buy her a house, put it in her name and give her an annuity. Make her financially independent and give your courtship a true handicap.”
“My courtship is already handicapped…I’m hard of hearing.”
“Yes and your merry wife will wisely choose to remain married to a boring brute rather than starve.” Morley stopped and fumbled through his pockets, “Oh blast, I’ve forgotten my good luck coin. I can’t kill anything without my coin. Wait here for me.”
“Hurry up; you’re the one dying to shoot all the birds.”
As Marshall watched Henry run back up the hill, the chill in his stomach started producing ice crystals. Henry couldn’t kill a woman and innocent babe, could he? Henry was a cynic not a criminal and his hypothesis of setting Merry financially free made a good deal of painful sense. If she had her own house, if she had financial freedom; her heart would be able to freely decide her fate. If she chose to remain his wife he wouldn’t have to wonder if she loved him or her gilded cage, but the thought of going a whole day without seeing her made him deeply melancholic. The thought of having to wait in hateful silence in-between visits was too hateful. No, he’d wait and see what she said after three months. If she said she couldn’t love him he’d buy her a house near his own so he could see her every day…she couldn’t be displeased with that. Given time maybe he’d persuade her…
…
Mary’s lace bobbins hung forgotten as she stared out the window as her thoughts continuously repeated her husband’s morning visit. She allowed herself to remember his kisses, but didn’t dare examine the feelings clamouring for immediate resolution. Three weeks of abundant kindness could not possibly be long enough to ascertain her true feelings, but what did it mean to fall in love? Was love a special feeling for one person or was it a promise to adore one special person? Her thoughts kept returning to being held tightly in her husband’s arms. Could there be any other place in the world where she’d feel as safe or happy? Footsteps stopped outside her door causing her heart to dance with pleasure. He hadn’t gone. He’d kiss her again and look at her with those sapphire eyes that made her melt. The door quietly opened and her lungs ached for air as Lord Morley closed the door behind him and sauntered over to her window seat as if he’d been invited. “Ah the magical Lady Mary sitting all alone unprotected day dreaming of being kissed…”
“Where’s Marshall?”
Morley sat down on the edge of the window seat, “He’s conveniently out of the way down by the lake. I was hoping for an opportunity to get to know you intimately…” She cringed as he leant closer to sniff her face. “You smell utterly delicious; eau de fear, my favourite.”
“What do you want?”
“You must know how you affect me. Every time I see you I feel like I’m going to burst with need…”
His light caress on her throat made Mary wince in disgust. “Don’t touch me! Leave…”
“You don’t want me to leave. You want me to tell you that since the moment we met I’ve wanted to make love to you. Marshall’s right, there’s something magical about you. It’s a pity you’re not a little fatter…”
“You are impertinent Sir and I want you to leave.”
“Mary, Mary…you know you find me attractive. You want me to touch you…”
“Never!”
“You long for my kisses…”
“The thought makes me sick.”
“Your resistance is refreshing. Most females simply lie back and play dead and wait for me to finish. I hope you’ll never become one of those tiresome creatures.”
“Get out or I’ll scream.”
“Who’d hear you? Even if Marshall was in the next room I could take you without fear of discovery. And don’t pretend to be a faithful wife. We all know they’re a myth. If you were my wife I’d keep you locked up in my bedchamber. I wouldn’t share you with anyone.”
“The only myth is that you were ever Marshall’s friend. If he knew you were saying those things to me he’d kill you.”
“True, but you’d never persuade him to believe you. The fool trusts me…”
A loud knocking on the door drew a venomous scowl from Morley and a sigh of relief from Mary, “Come!” The door swung inward and five Smirkes stuck their heads into the room.
Cecil looked from Mary’s cringing posture to the smiling devil blocking her escape from the window, “We heard you were feeling under the weather and thought we might entertain you.”
“Oh do come in Mr Smirke…I was hoping to hear more about your family.” The five beautiful young men sauntered into the room and looked about for a place to sit. “Leave the door open and pull up a chair…there are two more through that door, in my husband’s room.”
Morley sneered at the unexpected rescuers and slid off the window seat perfectly composed, “I shall take my leave Lady Mary and go shoot some birds. Is there any message you’d like me to give to Marshall?” She shook her head. “Very well, I shall have to make something up…” Morley turned to address Cecil Smirke standing nearby, “It would be ungentlemanly of me not to warn you that Lord Raynham won’t call you out after I tell him I found you entertaining his wife; he’ll just shoot you. Good day gentlemen…my Lady.”
George Smirke watched in disgust as Morley strolled out the door, “Cecil, you know he’s going to cook up some lie to Raynham. We’re all going to end up in the family vault with Mamma…Papa’s going to kill us.”
“No one’s going to die George, stop imagining the worst.” Cecil smiled as he claimed the edge of the window seat. “Morley’s a monster. You should keep you’re door locked when you’re alone.”
“I’m so glad you’ve come.”
“We saw Morley return alone and George felt we should follow him.”
“Thank you Mr Smirke. If you hadn’t knocked on the door…”
“Papa says true gentlemen must always be prepared to rescue maidens in distress, even if the maiden doesn’t wish to be rescued. As he says, ‘It’s better to have one’s face slapped than leave a woman at the mercy of a scoundrel’.�
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Being surrounded by five beautiful young men was making Mary’s head spin. Smiling, she insisted that they tell her more about their family as she relaxed feeling safe.
Chapter 10
Marshall was sitting on a rock pondering the odds of winning Mary’s heart when Morley finally returned with an exaggerated expression of distaste, “I’m afraid I have unpleasant news…”
Marshall jumped up as his mind filled with endless horrors, “What?”
“I do so hate being the bearer of bad tidings, but I was passing Lady Mary’s room and thought I’d ask her if she needed anything. The door was ajar… Your wife was like a queen bee surrounded by smirking drones. She was unhappy to see me if you know what I mean.”
Marshall’s eyes filled with tears as his heart was pierced, “She’s flirting with Smirkes within minutes of kissing me goodbye?”
“So it would appear. Do you want to continue the shoot…?”
“You go bag a bird, I’ll go bag a Smirke.”
“You don’t want to kill the boys; you’ll end up hanging from a rope…”
“It’s my neck…what do you care?”
“Well as your friend…”
“Go to the devil!”
“They always shoot the messenger…” Marshall was already on his way back up the hill wiping his eyes on his sleeve as the poison started to turn his heart to stone.
…
“So this is how you relax…” Marshall’s words thundered into Mary’s chamber as the six seated people jumped to their feet. “…you dally with a pack of pretty Smirkes.”
The Smirkes looked at each other in horror, “Cecil?”
“Yes Cosmo…”
“I wish I was ugly.”
“So do I…”
Mary pushed her way past the young men and threw her arms around her husband. Marshall’s heart and lungs threatened to explode from the weight of Mary’s head against chest. The fact the five young Smirkes were standing shoulder to shoulder eying him with dread made him more suspicious. “Which one of you Smirkes touched my wife?”
Facing a man with murder in his eyes the nineteen year old Cosmo broke down in tears, “I only kissed her hand. Oh God, I’ll be good. I won’t tell another dying rich relation that my brothers’ laugh at them…I won’t cheat at cards or fix the odds. I want to kiss a girl before I die…I want my Papa!”
Robert Smirke turned from Marshall to his crying brother, “You cheat at cards and fix the odds? I’m going to pummel you…”
“What does it matter? He’s going to kill me for touching his wife.”
Robert smiled with glee, “I’ve lost count of the girls I’ve kissed.”
“You haven’t!”
“I have…and they all said I was the most charming Smirke ever born.”
“I’m the charming Smirke, you’re a penniless brat.”
“It appears you charm the dying with lies, while I charm the living with kisses. I’ve kissed Mary, the baker’s daughter, at least ten times and Polly, the Innkeeper’s daughter, I’ve lost count how many times she’s enjoyed my lips. You’re not as charming as you think you are.”
“You kissed Polly? She said she was saving her lips for her husband.”
“She was…until my lips were offered.”
George Smirke flexed his fists before grabbing Cosmo by the collar, “You lying cheating pig! You will kindly write the name of each of the six properties you’ve inherited at our expense on six pieces of paper and we will each draw one out of a hat. You will give us the property we draw or I’ll tell Papa that you’re a cheat and a liar and you know he’ll send you to Bolingbroke to live with Uncle John. And while you receive endless lectures on the blessings of being a good man, you’ll be lonely and miserable and we’ll have endless adventures without you. You may keep the two remaining properties and think yourself luckier than you deserve.”
Marshall forgot the five squabbling brothers and refocused on Mary pressing her face into his shoulder. He dropped his voice to a hoarse whisper, “What the devil are they doing in your room? I left you to rest not ensnare a lover.”
“They saw Morley come back and followed him…”
“What does Henry have to do with it?”
“He was saying the most awful things. He demanded…wifely intimacies…”
“Henry has a vile sense of humour; you simply misunderstood him. He’s bed some of the most beautiful women in the world, why would he want my hired wife?”
“I don’t know…because I’m yours and he hates that you’re happy?”
“Henry’s a heartless wretch, not a monster.” The words ricocheted in Marshall’s brain. Was Henry a monster? Confusion rattled around in Marshall’s heart. There were Henry’s words and Mary’s words. Mary disliked Henry; Henry despised Mary. Mary claimed Henry wanted to seduce her; Henry claimed Mary wanted to be seduced by Smirkes. Mary said it was Henry, Henry said it was the Smirkes; either one or both were lying. “I want all you Smirkes to get out of my wife’s room.” The brothers all looked at Cecil for guidance. Did they stay and defend the lady’s from her husband or leave? “I’ll go ask Henry to explain himself and tell him to stay away from you. Lock the door and have a rest. We’ll pretend this never happened.”
“I always tell the truth Marshall. He caressed my neck like a lover and tried to kiss me. I told him to go away, but he wouldn’t. He said the more I resisted the more he’d want me.” Her lower lip started to tremble, “He sat down next to me on the window seat. I couldn’t leave…he knows you trust him. He only went away because the Smirkes knocked on the door and I asked them to enter.”
“Merry…I know Henry’s a rakehell, but he wouldn’t touch my wife, I’d kill him.”
“But don’t you see…he knows you won’t believe me.”
“Merry…this must all be a misunderstanding.” Marshall’s brain swirled with awful thoughts. If it was a misunderstanding then why had Henry led him to believe he’d found Mary flirting with the Smirkes? The thought made Marshall’s head ache. Either Henry was capable of the vilest actions or he was incapable of making his sense of humour understood. “I’ll ask Henry to stay away from you. Will that make you feel better?”
“I’ll feel better when we leave. He’s evil.”
“I won’t let anyone hurt you my love…ly Perfect Woman.” He couldn’t have fallen in love with a woman he’d found through an advertisement, he couldn’t. It wasn’t romantic. He wasn’t supposed to fall in love with his hired wife; she was supposed to fall in love with him. What if she chose an annulment? What if she fell in love with a Smirke? He pushed the thought to the back of his mind and gently took hold of her face, “No one is going to hurt you. Stay here and lock the door after we leave.”
He kissed away her tears and then kissed her hand before turning away to find he was the focus of nervous black eyes. “If you ever touch my wife…”
Cecil Smirke stepped in front of his brothers and leaned in as close as he dared to Marshall’s ear, “We wouldn’t touch your wife Raynham. Papa says, ‘A true gentleman doesn’t make love to another man’s wife even if he falls in love with her.’ Papa says if we want a woman we find our own, but if you lose all reason you must kill me because I’m the eldest and I’m responsible for their safety. Papa would never forgive me if I allowed…”
George Smirke pushed his brother out of the way, “Don’t listen to him, he’s an idiot! If you must kill one of us, kill me. Papa would be heartbroken if Cecil died. He was Mamma’s favourite.”