“Ow!”
“Ow? Really? You just fought off a tiger, sport.”
“Well, he didn’t fuck around with my ankle afterward.”
She sighed. “You’ve got a good sprain. Let me get my bag and I’ll clean up those cuts.”
Shit. She was pissed. Her force fields were up and she was asking Scotty for more power. She turned to stand up and he caught her arm. “Hey.”
She turned back around and gave him exactly zero eye contact.
He gently stroked the inside of her wrist with his thumb and moved his head over to catch her gaze. “I’m sorry.”
That was all it took.
She put her hands to her face and burst into tears.
He pulled her in between his legs, put his cheek to her belly, and wrapped his arms around her. He had no idea how long they stayed that way. When she seemed like she was calming down some, he put his chin against her stomach and looked up at her.
She ran her hands through his hair and sniffled. “I could kill you, you know that?”
“I think you’ll have to get in line for that one.”
She smiled. “Don’t make me laugh. I wanna stay mad at you.”
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
She kneeled down in front of him and pulled him to her. As they held each other, tears came to his eyes when it hit him that he’d almost gotten her killed. Again. He was the one who was supposed to be dead. He was the one living on stolen time. He never should have made it out of that Humvee. Why was everyone around him paying the price?
CHAPTER TWELVE
Evy went into the technology room at the youth center and closed the door behind her. She could just as easily have done this at home, but the internet connection and computers at the lab were a lot faster. She sighed. That wasn’t it. Now that she had decided to do some digging on Troy Thomsen, she didn’t want to wait until ten o’clock that night when she got home from the center.
God. She couldn’t believe she was about to do this. Oh, please, Evy. Who the hell was going to know? So she did a search on Troy Thomsen. Big friggin’ deal. People googled shit on other people all the time, right?
She brought up the search engine and typed in his name, along with Southie and the name of their high school.
Nothing.
That was odd.
She deleted their high school and added a few different search terms. Again nothing. Okay. She was going to have to get serious. She looked up Boston’s Department of Children and Families. She had no idea where that was going to get her. It wasn’t as though she could access his direct file. And anyway, he was a legal adult. DCF wouldn’t have his current address.
The door suddenly opened and her friend Liz came strolling in. “You’re here early. Was your class canceled?”
“No, I cut out.”
“That’s weird for you. Me, not so much. Must be something important.” She leaned over Evy’s shoulder. “Troy Thomsen, huh? Well, he’s certainly more important than getting your degree.”
Evy flushed. “I came in to start an assignment, nosey.”
“And that’s how you ended up on the DCF website?”
“Okay, fine. I was just wondering what he was up to now. I couldn’t seem to find anything on our school site, so…”
“Look, Evy, you don’t have to defend anything to me.” Liz froze. “Wait, did you say he wasn’t on the high school site?”
“Nope. It’s like he was never even there.”
“Okaaay.”
“What?”
“It’s just that I chair that alumnae committee. We have just about everyone current.”
Evy laughed. “If you’re in charge, I believe you.”
“I just like to be thorough when I do things.”
Ya think? “Uh-huh.”
“Anyway, more importantly, I know we have his information. I’ve seen it. Scoot over.”
An hour later they had scoured the alumnae site, the DMV, and criminal records. Wow. Liz knew how to do a lot of shit. Nothing. It was like the guy had never been born.
“Okay, this has officially piqued my interest,” Liz said. “For all intents and purposes, the guy you saw walking by you a few weeks ago doesn’t exist according to the Internet. We can’t even get an address for him, even though he’s obviously alive and breathing.”
Evy shook her head. “This just keeps getting weirder and weirder.”
“You can say that again. But, have no fear, Liz is here. I’ll figure it out.”
“You’re a goof.”
Diesel lined up the seven ball to the side pocket, then changed his mind. “I think maybe we should throw some more into this bet, SE.”
“Ah, in case you haven’t noticed, my brother, our females are kicking our asses right now.”
“No worries, bro. I’m holding back my awesomeness for later in the game.”
Ana rolled her eyes. “Are you going to take the shot today or are we gonna need to go for food and water?”
X laughed and turned up the music.
Diesel almost went through the ceiling. “Jesus, X! Don’t do that when I’m concentrating!”
“Easy there, Tiger. My bad.”
Diesel looked across the table at his female who was looking at him with a worried expression. He went back to focusing on the game, sinking the seven ball by hitting the nine. “Bonus.”
Troy walked in and grabbed a beer from the fridge. “Whassup, fellas? Gettin’ your arses kicked by your females again I see.”
Helen took a sip of beer, hopped down off the stool, and started to chalk her cue. “Do you want to end the game right now, Ana, or should we wait a bit and see if we can catch a glimpse of this elusive awesomeness?”
He gave her an air kiss.
Troy shook his head. “She’s out for blood, bro.”
X grinned. “Nope. Far worse. Losers cook dinner tomorrow night.”
Troy shook his head. “Fan-friggin-tastic. Who’s the genius who came up with that one?”
SE gave a nod in Diesel’s direction.
“Natch.”
Diesel casually leaned on the bar and gave him the finger.
Ana grinned. “I think we’ve let them suffer enough, don’t you Helen?”
She smiled. “You know, you’re right. It’s pretty cruel considering they still have to cook for us.”
Diesel watched his mate sink her last two balls and the eight ball all in one shot.
“Bouya!” X yelled.
Diesel pulled her to him and kissed her forehead. “Well played, gorgeous.”
“Thanks, my male.”
Ana put her cue away. “Shit. I’m supposed to take the baby for Adriana. I’m out.”
Helen followed her out the door. “I’ll walk you up.”
X grinned at Diesel. “So, what are you making tomorrow night, Ramsey?”
Troy snickered. “Hope they like hamburger helper.”
An hour later, Diesel met Pax in the compound hallway. “What’s on the docket for tonight?”
“There’s an abandoned storefront in Mattapan. Reyn wants us to check it out. He thinks it’s a possible den.”
“Let’s head there first then. Maybe we’ll have some time to gank a few couples afterward.”
They materialized one after the other two buildings away from the one in question.
Diesel took out his pistol. “Huh. Pretty small for a den.”
“It does look quiet.”
“I’ll buzz in and check out the sitch.”
“Be careful, Dies. This doesn’t feel right.”
“I always am.”
“If you’re not back in five, I’m coming in.”
Diesel gleamed into what seemed like the smallest room. Kitchen. So they were dealing with some now defunct diner. And from what he could tell, there was no one—scratch that!
An arm came around him from behind and he flipped the cocksucker to the ground in front of him. He took the shifter by the throat to keep him quiet. Hang on. What
the fuck? He couldn’t sense any other shifters nearby except Pax.
“Why are you here alone?”
The Toltec soldier stared at him wide-eyed.
He squeezed his neck harder. “I asked you a question. Where’s the wife, asshole?”
The explosion from behind him knocked him clear over the counter and onto his side. He sat up and stared at the fire coming from the stove. He was vaguely aware of the enemy as he got to his feet, ran for a side door, and escaped.
When Pax materialized inside the storefront, what he saw put his blood on ice. His best friend was standing in front of what looked like a gas fire. He was waving his coat at it wildly and screaming.
“Will! Will!”
Holy. Shit. “Diesel!”
He crossed the room in seconds, leapt over the counter, and grabbed the brother by his shirt. “Diesel! It’s gonna blow! We have to leave!”
Diesel turned and looked at him. He was panting, his eyes wild. “We have to get them out!”
“We gotta go, man!”
“Will’s still in there! I won’t leave him!”
Fuck! Pax did the only thing he could think of. He grabbed onto the male as tight as he could and gleamed out just as the explosion hit. As they materialized in the foyer, Diesel threw him off. He had stopped shouting Will’s name and was now yelling at him directly.
“How could you just leave him there! How could you leave him to die!”
“There was no one in there, man!”
Shifters were coming from all over the house wondering what all the commotion was about.
Helen came running to the top of the main staircase. “Ana! My bag! It’s on my nightstand!” She flew down the stairs, reaching the bottom just as Ana materialized there. Pax watched as the doc pulled a syringe out of her bag and started to fill it from a bottle.
He looked up just in time to see Diesel running straight for him. Never, in all the time he’d known him, had he seen that look on his face. His eyes blazed. The brother’s very scent gave off a murderous rage.
“X! Grab him!” He heard Ana yell.
Diesel’s hands came up and Pax instinctively knew that they were going for his throat. Thank fuck X got to the male first. His fist slammed into the side of his jaw, throwing him off balance. As he hit the floor, Helen stabbed him in the ass with the syringe.
She looked up. “Will you guys help me get him downstairs?”
“You want him in the ward?” Troy asked.
“No. Our room’s fine. He’ll be out for a while. I’ll be down in a minute. Would you stay with him ‘til I get there?”
X nodded. “Yeah, no problem.”
As the two brothers gleamed out with Diesel, Pax suddenly realized he was shaking.
“Oh, Pax.”
He felt Helen’s arms wrap around his middle and he sank into her small shoulder.
“It’s okay. He had a flashback. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“He was just standing there, trying to beat out the fire with his coat, and screaming for Will over and over.”
She looked up and rubbed his arm. “I’m so sorry. It must’ve been the fire that triggered it. He’s not angry with you, Pax. He probably wasn’t even sure who you were.”
“It sure as hell felt like it.”
“I know, hon. I know.”
Diesel groaned, rolled over on his side, and opened his eyes. His mate was sitting next to him looking through some files. Wait, it was daylight?
“Hey. You’re awake. How do you feel?”
With way too much effort, he sat up and leaned against the headboard. “Don’t ask. What the hell happened?”
“You were out on duty with Pax last night and you had a flashback.”
He groaned. “Fuck. Is he okay?”
“He was pretty shaken up, but he’ll be fine. Has anything like this ever happened before?”
“No, never.”
“I’m surprised. You deal with a lot of triggers when you’re on duty. Pax said there was a fire last night?”
He shook his head. “I can’t remember.” He cracked his neck. “Man, what did you hit me with?”
“A ton of sedative.”
“That explains why my limbs weigh a hundred pounds each.” He rubbed his face. “Who nailed my jaw?”
“X.”
No wonder it was creaky.
She kissed his cheek. “I’ll make some coffee. It’ll help. Reyn and Richard wanted to see you when you came around.”
“Hey, Doc?”
She turned in the doorway.
“Who knows about it?”
“Ah, Pax, X, Troy, and Ana.”
He looked down at his lap. “They’re gonna put my ass on leave for this.”
“Maybe not. It’s never happened before. I’ll be right back.”
Diesel sat with his elbows on his knees and tried to wrap his head around the sitch. Fighting meant the world to him, but how could he justify being out there if he was a danger to his own brothers? That shit was just wrong. Ah, hell. They’d probably pull him anyway. He picked up the phone and in as few words as possible, he let Reyn know he was conscious.
A couple of minutes later, his female was back with two mugs of Dark Magic Extra Bold.
“So, does this mean that the PTSD is getting worse?”
“Not necessarily. It doesn’t really work that way. The medication I put you on to help you sleep is working well. You’ve been thrashing less in your sleep. I’m adding an antidepressant tomorrow to help with the jumpiness and anxiety. There’s also a med that could help with flashbacks. But the most important thing right now is therapy.”
“No way. Look what happened to you when Adriana saw you as an outside doctor.”
She leaned over and ran a hand through his hair. “I know. I happen to be mated to the most amazing male.”
That’s me. Mr. Amazing. “Seriously, Doc. Even if they agree to it, which I doubt, I can’t risk another civilian’s life. There’s just no way.”
She sighed. “Okay, well, we’ll just have to hope the meds do enough on their own.”
An hour later, Diesel went up to the mansion and walked to the study door where Pax was already waiting. He leaned against the wall. “Hey, bro.”
“Hey.”
“Guess I probably scared the shit out of you last night.”
“Wasn’t your fault.”
“Yeah, well, it still sucks and I’m still sorry.”
He couldn’t have been sorrier. What if there had been more than one Toltec shifter there when it happened? What if the whole place had been loaded with goddamn Frankenshifters? Christ. He was starting to feel like he was somehow toxic. Maybe pulling him out of the field was for the best.
Pax looked down at his watch. “I guess we better get in there. Won’t look good if we show up late.” He turned and looked at him with those big, brown eyes. “You know, Dies, I could always—”
“Don’t even think about it. I won’t have you lying for me, Pax. Just tell them what happened exactly as you remember it, okay? Will you do that for me?”
Pax nodded and went in. Diesel followed and closed the door behind them.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Diesel and Pax sat down next to Richard. Diesel looked across the large partners desk at Reyn. He knew he was about to be put on leave. The only question was for how long.
Richard spoke first. “I talked to Helen earlier this morning. I asked her if you were in treatment for PTSD and she said I needed to ask you, Diesel. Confidentiality and all that.”
He nodded. “Yeah, I am.”
Reyn pushed his hair back. “Has anything like this ever happened before?”
“No. This was the first flashback I’ve had. My issues are generally more adrenaline related. I can get really keyed up sometimes. I was having problems sleeping, but that’s been better since I started treatment.”
Richard turned to Pax. “There are a million triggers out there when we’re on duty. We’re literally in battle
. In your honest opinion, based on what you witnessed last night and anything else you may have noticed, is Diesel okay to be in the field?”
Jesus. Talk about getting right to the point. He looked at Pax, but his partner kept his eyes on Richard.
“I’m no doctor. I can only give my personal opinion. This is the first issue he’s ever had out in the field. He’s never had an incident of any kind before this. Speaking as his partner, I would trust him without question. He’s saved my ass more than once.”
Reyn rubbed his chin. “Diesel? How do you feel about it?”
“Honestly, right now I agree with Pax. I didn’t think I would, but I guess, at this point, I do. But if I have another flashback or any other kind of related incident on duty, I want to be pulled. No question.”
Reyn gave a nod. “Okay. Why don’t you two take your next duty off and rest up a bit. I’ll check with Helen, and if she clears you for duty, you’re all set. While I’ve got you, there’s one other thing that concerns me about this. There was only one Toltec shifter there when you gleamed in?”
Diesel gave a nod. “Yeah, just the one. Pax saw him run out.”
Reyn looked over at Richard. “Is it possible that we got a phony tip and the gas fire was a set-up?”
He’d been so freaked out by his flashback, it hadn’t even dawned on him. “Son of a bitch.”
Richard rubbed his temples. “You got that right. Did we get a name from the caller?”
“No name. It was a male and the call came from a payphone, according to Xavier.”
Pax spoke up. “If it was a den, it may just be that the shifter received orders to burn the thing out once they were done with it.”
“Good point. Okay, I think we’re done for now. Thank you for your honesty, my brothers.”
Diesel followed Pax to the pool room and into the elevator to the compound. “Listen, bro. Did you mean what you said in there? That you’re okay fighting with me? I need to know.”
“Yeah, I’m okay with it. But I also think what you said is right. If it ever happens again, they should put your ass on leave until the issue is dealt with.”
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