"Good." Casov moved off.
"Your boss is kind of creepy."
"He's just curious."
"About what?"
"You."
"Why?"
"Because as he said, I find you very distracting, particularly when you won't acknowledge me. Apparently, I am not entirely effective when you reject me."
"I didn't reject you."
"Didn't you? It felt like it." He turned to her and then smiled, lightening what could otherwise have been the start of a quite heavy conversation, one they kind of needed to have.
"You know full well that it’s the difficult path we've chosen."
"Is it so difficult?"
"To trust you?"
"Yes."
"Honestly, I don't know. Are you trustworthy?"
Peter moved closer and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. Shay felt the touch radiating down her neck and spine, ending in a slight shiver. "Have I ever lied to you?"
"Have you?"
"I don't lie. I'll always be honest with you, brutally even. It is in my nature, it seems."
"Really. Do you like my dress?"
"I like your dress," he said, leaning into her ear. Goosebumps rose all over Shay's body, making her close her eyes. She was so ridiculously attracted to him, she couldn't see straight. But she knew it was more than attraction. She wanted what was best for him; she wanted to ensure he didn't get hurt, but she didn't have complete control over that—Peter had half.
"Come," he said, tugging lightly on her hand. She didn't care where he led her; she just wanted to be with him. It had been torture staying away from him last night, but she'd forced herself.
Walking through the crowd of people who knew him, they reached a round table and sat down at two of the chairs surrounding the beautifully lain table. Others were taking their seats as well. She could feel their eyes on her. She must be a novelty.
Shay placed her champagne on the table after taking a swig. "Do you know everyone here?"
"Most of them," he said, turning to her. "They're industry people, and other assorted. London is quite small when you get into your circles. You wouldn't think so, but it is."
The room quieted and a woman approached the podium, welcoming everyone. She started a speech talking about the importance of preserving history, the importance of culture and the meaning of being British. It was all rather boring in Shay's book, particularly as the whole Britishness was lost on her. Turning her attention to Peter, she watched him as his eyes wandered around the room. She couldn't believe how beautiful he was and that he wanted her. How in the world had that happened?
After the rather lengthy speech, dinner was served, carried out on plates by an army of waiters. They were more her kind of crowd; the people that served this kind of place. She felt awkward, again concerned how easily she could be absorbed into Peter's world, into Peter. He was just so bright and he took all her attention when she was near him, mesmerising her like a snake charmer.
Dessert was the most decadent chocolate thing she had ever eaten. There were raspberries too, but the chocolate was divine, melting in her mouth. The only thing better were his kisses and she ached for one.
A guy stopped by their table, talking to Peter. "You can go mingle if you want," she said. "I'll be okay."
"Are you sure? There are a couple of people I should say hello to."
"Yeah," she said with a nod. These were his people and she felt like she was holding him back if he was stuck babysitting her the entire time. Peter stroked her shoulder as he stood and walked over to speak to an older man. He grabbed a champagne flute from a passing waiter, holding it lightly in his fingertips as he approached his quarry. His hand slipped into his pocket. He looked so relaxed and confident, a part of this setting. She would have to tolerate evenings like this being with him, but she didn't relish it. Saying that, it was quite interesting sitting back and watching people. For some, this was clearly their social circuit, while a few others looked less comfortable. She could empathise.
Again she wondered if he was better off with someone who wanted to go to places like this, although maybe part of his interest in her lay in the fact that she didn’t. She wasn't using him for anything—lifestyle, contacts. A case could definitely be said for her using him for his body. Guilty as charged. She smiled to herself.
"Shay," she heard and suddenly looked up. It was the Kiwi girl, Alex.
"Oh. Hi," Shay said, feeling a little uncertain. She couldn't quite pin down Alex and her relationship with Peter.
Alex sat down. "If you're here, Peter must be."
"Over there," Shay said, pointing in Peter's direction.
"So he is. I will have to say hello at some point. He is my boss now."
"I didn't know."
"Except I'll be working in the Shanghai office."
"That sounds exciting."
Alex reached forward and grabbed Shay's hand. "I'm glad you're here. Peter isn't the most emotionally savvy guy around, you've probably guessed. Although he may not be aware, he's been searching for something for a while, and he's found it, I guess."
Shay cleared her throat, feeling uncomfortable with the frankness of the discussion, particularly the depths of Peter's feelings. There were some things there still not reconciled in her mind.
"I think you're going to be good for him."
Smiling awkwardly, Shay wished this conversation would end. She wasn't like his saviour or something. The responsibility of it was a little too much. She wished she could speak to Alex about it, but wasn't sure she could. She was Peter's friend; actually the only one Shay had met. It didn't feel right unloading her concerns on Alex, especially as Alex seemed so keen on her being there.
"Ladies," Peter said, appearing back at the table. "I see you made it, Alex. Is your beau here as well?"
"He's here somewhere."
"I take it you have informed him of your new career path."
"He's still a bit iffy about it."
"But he'll come."
"He will."
"Good. What have you two been talking about?"
"You," Alex stated.
Peter sat down and put his elbow on the table. "Do tell."
"Just discussing how much trouble you are."
Peter's eyes travelled to Shay who felt uncomfortable under the scrutiny. The worst was that he noticed her discomfort, too.
"Dance with me," he said. "Dance with me," he repeated more quietly, "and I'll take you home after."
Home, she repeated. She wanted to go home and undress Peter, just be the two of them wrapped in their own little cocoon, but there was also something very scary about what he'd just said. He was tugging on her hand, drawing her out of her seat, walking them to the dance floor, easing her to him. Shay felt his body press against her, so familiar, along with the strong flare of heat scoring her insides, causing a flush to spread across her. She looked up at him as his arm came around her, clasping her to him. She'd never danced like this, not properly, but they were hidden in a crowd of other dancers, none of whom Shay noticed.
"It isn't my home," she said after a while and Peter searched her eyes. "It's your place and I love being there with you, but it isn't my home."
"You're not going to live with me, then?"
Shay shook her head. "No."
"But I want you there. I miss you being there."
"And I will be your girlfriend. I come over, we hang out, but I live in my flat."
Peter watched her intently. "It's hard not to notice that you're reluctant. Is it so hard to love me?"
"Perhaps scary is the better word." Shay rested her forehead to his chin, breathing in his scent. She loved him so completely.
He studied her for a moment. "I know," he said after a while, shifting his head over and kissing her on the temple. She felt better having said it, and also for him acknowledging it. "This is something I've avoided for a long time."
"Then why are we here?"
"Because I can't stand the alte
rnative. I want you there. I want you, and I can't lose you. I certainly couldn't bear you turning your attention to someone else. I get jealous when you speak to the doorman."
"Edging toward the crazy possessive again."
"I can't help it. I am new to this. I don't really know how to process these feelings, and some of them are utterly irrational."
"Do you wish you didn't have them?" Shay held her breath.
"Do you?"
It was a question she'd asked herself. "How can I regret falling in love? The way I feel about you. I wouldn't change that for anything, but it's still scary." She wasn't being entirely truthful and he's just promised her he'd never lie to her. "A few days ago, if I could have taken a pill to stop feeling this way, I would have." She could feel Peter tensing under her hands. She was only telling the truth and he deserved to hear nothing less. "I didn't want to be in love with you."
"Why?"
"Because you don't want to be here. I'm this unfortunate thing that happened to you, stealing you away from the life you want—the one where I was just some nurse, below your notice and you can go on being the untouchable island."
"It isn't that simple."
"Everything you've said to me so far about love is how horrible it is—fat and happy and all that, a drug that steals everything away from you. I'm obviously out to ruin you in some way. Don't tell me that if there was a pill to take it all away, you wouldn't."
Peter didn't say anything and Shay closed her eyes. Maybe she had been better off not saying anything, just glossing over the cracks and pretending they weren’t there. But she couldn't live like that. She stepped away, but Peter pulled her back, holding her firmly to him.
"I wouldn't change it," he said after a while, like it was painful to admit it. "I can't go back now. I want to show you everything I know. I want to be together, to fight and make up. I want you to be there. The intimacy we have. To know who I am. You see past the crap and there's no compromise with you. I can't distract or manipulate you."
"I don't know about distract; you're pretty good at it."
Peter smiled, then paused. "I almost died. My life was so close to slipping away, and it was empty. I woke up and there you were, frowning at me. It was like I asked for you and you appeared. I have watched you try and struggle; you hid nothing; you take yourself at face value and expect the same in return. Do you even know how rare you are?" Peter looked down into her eyes, drawing her in. "I'm not letting you go now." Leaning down, he kissed her and Shay felt the world slip away, replaced by impossible sweetness. She needed them to remove all these barriers between them; she needed them to be alone.
"Can we go home now?"
"Yes," Peter said, smiling.
"Your home, I mean. I don't live there. I still need to take this whole thing slowly. I can't just be enveloped in you. I need my friends. So not ready for family and cohabitation." She was babbling, but her heart was overflowing with happiness. "So for now, you know, until I'm ready, it's your place."
"How about we think of it as home just for tonight," he said, stroking his thumb down her cheek. "I'll think about tomorrow in the morning." Shay blinked, not really understanding the references, but Peter kissed her again and it slipped away.
Epilogue
* * *
The phone rang as Shay sat in the rickety table in the square as the warm Atlantic breeze blew over them, clearing some of the heat and rustling the leaves.
Jess raised her eyebrows. "Seriously, he's like a lost puppy. I'll go look for a paper." Jess rose and walked across the square.
"Peter," Shay said, smiling, knowing it sickened Jess when she went all gooey on the phone.
"When are you coming home?"
"In a week. Just a few more days and I'll be back."
"Tell me where you are."
"No. How was Shanghai?"
"Still there. I hate coming home and you're not here."
"You knew I wouldn't be. How's Alex?"
"Turning into quite a maverick, actually."
"I'm sure under your guidance, she can't be anything but."
"I want to see you. Tell me where you are."
"No. We both know you are categorically unable to backpack."
"Why backpack when there are five star hotels?"
"That is completely beside the point. Besides, where we are, in this rustic mountain village, there are no hotels that would suit you. It is all disturbingly rustic."
"Fine, but the next time, you're going with me to the Maldives. No Jess."
"Jess would love the Maldives."
"Yes, but I don't love the competition for you attention." She could hear Peter smiling. "Although I could bring a friend along."
"I am not having you set up Jess with one of your debauched friends."
"Debauched? My friends are just high-spirited. I'll show you debauched. Tell me where you are."
"The bus is leaving. I have to go, Peter. I love you. I will be back in a few days."
"You're a cruel woman, Shay McPherson, although Dunham would sound so much better."
"Goodbye, Peter," Shay hung up and watched as Jess walked back, her white skirt swaying in the breeze.
"Only Portuguese papers. How's Mr. Love-puppy?"
"Just go home."
The Gem Story Board
If you’re interested in some of the images I had in mind as I wrote this book, check out the story board for it. http://www.pinterest.com/camilleosternz/the-gem/
Other Books by Camille Oster
Sequence Effect-Gwennie Elders doesn't regret for a moment the debt she took on to extend her grandmother's life, but when running into trouble with repayments she had to resort to drastic actions to save her family's business and apartment. It would only be a year of her life and she'd be unconscious throughout--to awaken debt-free and able to resume her life as a baker on the city's ground level, hemmed in by the towers where the wealthy and privileged lived. But there are no easy and options, and although she emerges from her servitude debt-free, her family's business and her means of support fleeted away while she was asleep, forcing her to seek a means to support herself in the coming war.
http://www.amazon.com/Sequence-Effect-Camille-Oster-ebook/dp/B00JPBBZM2/ref=la_B00ALPYJHE_1_9?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1406181670&sr=1-9
Thief Taker -Former Bow Street Runner, Rowan Cox doesn't usually handle minor cases like housebreaking, but the Commissioner of the newly established Metropolitan police wants the thief haunting the finest houses in London caught. This thief is skilled and cunning, and far from what Rowan expected when the case was forced on him, and she defies him at every turn. Only one will win this high-stakes game and Rowan will be damned if it isn't him.
The one thing Serephina Woodford cannot do is let Rowan Cox near her, having been warned of his ruthless tactics. She is so close to achieving her goal and just needs to survive a few more months in order to provide her sister with the future she deserves. She just has to be better than the man trying to find her.
http://www.amazon.com/Thief-Taker-Camille-Oster-ebook/dp/B00NENSAFW/ref=la_B00ALPYJHE_1_10?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1410290035&sr=1-10
Truth and Sparta – Spartan do what they please when it comes to Helot girls and Chara curses the day that Nicias—effectively an enemy of her people—lays eyes on her and decides that he wants her for himself. His attention places her and her family in an awkward position, exasperated by her brother’s increasing appetite for rebellion. Soon she is placed in a position where she needs to take decision action to save her family—no matter the cost, and that includes the building attraction she feels for the Spartan soldier who is the cause of all her problems.
http://www.amazon.com/Truth-and-Sparta-ebook/dp/B00D0GX58U/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1377249689&sr=1-2
Contacting the Author
Email: [email protected]
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Camille-Oster/489718877729579
Twitter: @camille_oster
/>
Camille Oster, The Gem (D'Arth Book 4)
The Gem (D'Arth Book 4) Page 18