“Harold, I…” I don’t even know what to say to him. There’s nothing I can say that’ll make this better.
“You betrayed me, Noah, and in doing so you’re ruining your entire life. I had great plans for you. I thought of you as family. I supported you like you were one of my own.”
He turns away and runs a hand through his hair, his usually broad straight shoulders slumped. I swallow hard, trying my best to suppress the sorrow I feel. I knew this day would come. I knew he’d eventually find out, and I’ve been ready to face the consequences from the moment I decided to go after Amara.
“I’m sorry for breaking your trust,” I tell him. “But I won’t apologize for loving your granddaughter. I’m well aware that I don’t deserve her, but I’ll never stop trying to give her the best of me.”
He looks at me, his eyes flashing with rage. “The best of you? What is that exactly, Noah? You’re broken, and you know it. You’re half the man you could be, haunted by your past. You can’t offer Amara what she deserves, and you’ll break her heart. Your love for her will never overshadow the pain you live with.”
I laugh, the sound humorless. “You think you know me just because you’ve read my résumé, because you ran a background check? You know nothing about me, Harold.”
He shakes his head and looks down at his feet before looking up at me. “You’re fired, Noah. You’re fired on grounds of fraternizing with a patient, in addition to breaking regulation by getting involved with a student while employed as faculty staff. Effective immediately.”
I knew it was coming, but it still hurts. I inhale shakily and nod. “Very well. Fire me, Harold. But that won’t keep me away from Amara. I knew what I was getting into with her. I knew it’d cost me everything. I’ll bear the consequences.”
He stares me down, a hint of pain shining through his anger. “This is nothing yet, Noah. You have no idea what you got into. I warned you, over and over again. You’ll regret being with her. You’ll end up wishing you never set your eyes on my granddaughter. And when that day comes… it’ll shatter my little girl’s heart beyond repair.”
He runs a shaky hand through his hair, his face contorted with barely concealed desperation. “Walk away now,” he says. “Walk away now and I’ll leave you be. I’ll even write you a recommendation letter so you’ll be able to walk into a cushy job anywhere you please. Leave her. Leave Amara, and I’ll get you any job you want and one million dollars on top of it. Enough for you to do whatever the hell you please for years to come.”
He looks at me, his expression pleading, and I grit my teeth. “Do you love her?” I ask him. “Or is Amara just a tool to you, an asset? Do you care about her happiness at all?”
Harold smiles, even though his eyes convey misery. “More than you’ll ever know. More than she’ll ever know. I love my granddaughter, Noah. If you love her too, then walk away now and let her have the happiness I know she’d eventually find without you.”
“Happiness as defined by you? And what is that, Harold? Married to a man she doesn’t even like, giving up on her company and her dreams? No. Amara isn’t alone anymore, Harold. If you so much as try to take away her smile, you’ll have to go through me.”
He shakes his head and sighs. “Go through you? Noah, you’ll be the reason she’ll lose her smile. You’re the reason I’ll lose my granddaughter. You’ll alienate her from her family by refusing to leave her, and in the end, it’ll be you that’ll wreck her happiness. You think you love her, but when it comes down to it, that love won’t stand the test of time. You’ll falter, and you’ll do irreparable damage.” He holds his hands up and looks me in the eye, his gaze intense, unwavering. “I’ll get down on my knees and beg you if I must, Noah. Leave her.”
I shake my head. “No. She’s the single best thing that ever happened to me, and I know she’s happy with me too. You already took my job. I have nothing left to lose, Harold. I won’t let her go.”
He nods. “Then you leave me no choice. You’ll leave her eventually. You won’t be able to find a job. You will never work as a doctor again, Noah. You won’t be able to support Amara. Soon, you won’t even be able to put food on the table. Let’s see how long you can live like that. We’ll talk again. Soon.”
I smile at him. “No, we won’t.”
Harold looks around my office and shakes his head. “You have no idea what you’re throwing away. You don’t even realize how much more you’ll lose by defying me today, but you will. Eventually you will, and you’ll leave her. I’ll be counting down the days.”
He turns and walks out of my office, and I slump into my seat as the door closes behind him. My eyes fall closed as I fight to keep the desperation at bay. He’s right. He’s Harold Astor, and I’m nothing, no one. There’s every chance I won’t be able to support Amara, that I truly won’t be able to put food on the table, and when that happens… I’ll lose her.
Chapter 43
Amara
“Is it true?” my mother asks. I look up, finding her standing in my doorway, her eyes flashing with anger.
I frown, unsure what I’ve done to anger her this time. There’s always something. I’m always letting her down one way or another. “You’ll have to elaborate, mother.”
She crosses her arms over each other, a hint of sorrow behind the anger in her eyes. “Noah,” she says simply.
My first instinct is to deny everything, to hide it from her the way I hide everything I care about. But I can’t. Not this time. I can’t lie about Noah.
“Yes, it’s true,” I tell her, my voice soft. “We’re dating.”
“Dating?” she repeats. “You stood right here in this room when you promised me that you’d never get involved with him, that you two would never be more than friends.”
I rise to my feet, my body tense. “Mom, he makes me happy. When I’m with him, I’m happier than I’ve been in years. He makes me feel like myself again, Mom. Why wouldn’t you want that for me?”
She swallows hard, and I freeze when she visibly blinks away tears in her eyes. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done?” she asks. “Grandpa fired him. Noah was going places, Amara. You ruined his future, all because you couldn’t stay away. Because you wanted something that wasn’t meant for you and pursued it without caring about what it’d cost Noah, what it’ll cost you. There’s no happy ending here, Amara. No matter how much you think you love him, there’s no scenario in which you two end up happily married.”
I stare at her in shock, her words slowly registering. “Grandpa fired him? Why would he do that? Why would he put so much effort into mentoring Noah only to fire him?”
Mom stares at me, barely able to hide the flash of disgust in her eyes. “Because of you. Because of your selfishness. Noah promised your grandfather that he’d stay away from you, and he broke that promise. You know full well Grandpa operates under a zero-tolerance policy. Noah broke his trust, and it’ll cost him everything.”
I shake my head. “No. No way. I saw how the two of them were together. Grandpa cares about him. He wouldn’t…”
“But he did. He did, Amara, and it’s your fault. You took a risk, counting on Grandpa to forgive you two, but he won’t. He’ll never let you be with Noah. I warned you. I pleaded with you. You promised me you wouldn’t get involved with him, and yet here we are. Your relationship with Noah is done regardless of how hard you fight to be with him, because he’ll never forgive you for taking away the opportunities he had, the life that would’ve laid ahead of him if not for you. It might take time, it might even take years, but it’ll happen.”
I glare at her, swallowing down my own tears. “Noah isn’t like you, Mom. He won’t resent me the way you resented Dad. He’s a better person than you’ll ever be — and he’s talented. He doesn’t need Grandpa.”
Mom laughs, her eyes filled with disbelief. “You’re so naïve, Amara. You have no idea what you’ve done. You have no idea what your grandfather will do to Noah because of you. Noah will never work as a doct
or again. Not unless he leaves you. What do you think he’ll choose? You, or the career he worked for all his life? Did you know Noah’s father was a doctor? This isn’t just a job to him. It’s his father’s legacy. Do you think he’ll leave that behind for you?”
I look away, my heart squeezing painfully. I didn’t know that. I didn’t know Noah became a doctor because of his father. He never speaks of his parents. A hint of unease settles deep within me. I cling onto my faith in us, but part of me can’t help but fear that my mother is right. My love for Noah might lead to his ruin.
“Leave him, Amara. Walk away now, and your grandfather will spare him.”
“Is that what Grandpa told you, back when you chose to be with Dad?”
Her expression falters, and for a moment understanding flashes through her eyes. “It isn’t the same, Amara… but even so, I should’ve done as I was asked. I should’ve seen that my father wanted what was best for me, the way I want what’s best for you. For both of you. Leave him and let him live up to his endless potential. Please, Amara. Don’t let your selfishness ruin both your lives.”
A tear runs down my cheek as I open my lips to tell her I’ll never leave Noah, but my words remain stuck in my throat. Fear unlike anything I’ve ever felt renders me speechless. I can take responsibility for myself, for the consequences I’ll face because of my choices… but I can’t drag Noah down with me. I genuinely didn’t think Grandpa would fire him. I expected there to be tension between them, and I expected grandpa to disapprove… but I didn’t expect this.
“Is he home?” I ask, my voice soft.
Mom nods. “He’s in his office.”
I nod and walk past her, my heart feeling strangely tender, almost as though it knows it’s moments away from breaking. I swallow hard as I raise my hand to my grandfather’s office door. It’s a room he and I share so many fond memories in. I’m the only one that was ever allowed to disturb him while he was working from home, and he’d always drop everything to play with me when I was little, or to help me with homework when I insisted on his help instead of my tutor’s as I grew older.
I brace myself as I knock on his door, not waiting for him to call me in. My entire body is tense as I walk in, and when Grandpa looks up at me with a resigned look in his eyes, I’ve got the answers to questions I don’t want to ask.
I ask anyway.
“Did you fire Noah?” My voice breaks, and I clench my jaw, willing myself to keep it together.
He nods. “I warned him, Amara. He broke my trust.”
I look down, unable to face him, unable to hide the pain that’s slowly tearing through me.
“Why? Why are you doing this to him? To us?”
Grandpa looks at me, his expression solemn, not a hint of regret in his eyes. There’s no remorse. But then again, I never should have expected it from him.
“He did this to himself, Amara.”
I sniff, holding back my tears as best as I can. My lungs are burning, but I refuse to cry. “He gave you everything. He worked himself to the bone for you. He looked up to you, Grandpa. You were his hero. How could you? All because he loves me?”
Grandpa looks away when a stray tear runs down my cheek, and I swipe at it angrily. I can’t be weak. Not right now.
“I warned Noah. He knew my support hinged on him staying away from you, and he didn’t. He knew what the consequences would be, Amara. All I did was keep my word.”
“Your word,” I whisper. “What about your promises to me? All my life you’ve promised me you’d always be there for me, that you’d always be in my corner. Can’t you see that you doing this to Noah is killing me? It’s me you’re hurting, Grandpa… far more so than Noah. I love him, Grandpa.”
He shakes his head and sighs. “Love? You can’t love him, Amara. You don’t even know him.”
I stare at him in disbelief. “Grandpa, if you love me at all, even just a little… then please don’t do this to him. It’s my heart you’re breaking, not his.”
His eyes fall closed, and he inhales shakily. “Amara,” he says, his voice soft, pleading. “I love you more than anything. I always will.”
“Then why are you doing this to me? Wasn’t it enough to cut my company off from funding? Wasn’t it enough to destroy my dreams? Why are you going after every single thing that makes me happy, just because it doesn’t fit in with your idea of who I’m supposed to be?”
Grandpa stares at me, almost as though he’s at a loss for words. “Do you want to save him, Amara? Do you want to safeguard Noah’s future? Walk away. Leave him, and he won’t face repercussions for defying me.”
I shake my head. “Do this, and you’ll lose me. I will never forgive you.”
He sighs and looks out the window. “You will,” he murmurs. “But by then it’ll be too late.”
I stare at him, too tired to argue with him, to decrypt his words. Instead, I turn and walk away, looking back at him as I reach his office door.
“Goodbye, Grandpa,” I whisper, my voice breaking. I walk away, truly putting myself and my happiness first for the first time in my life.
Chapter 44
Noah
I look up when I hear the front door opening, a reluctant smile lifting the edges of my lips up. I rise to my feet when I hear her footsteps heading my way. Amara rounds the corner, her eyes finding mine, and I freeze when a tear drops down her cheek. She sniffs and bites down on her lip, trying her best to keep from falling apart, but I see the pain in those beautiful blue eyes of hers.
“I’m so sorry,” she says, her voice breaking. She chokes back a sob, and I rush up to her, taking her into my arms. “I’m sorry, Noah. This… it’s… it’s all my fault.”
I hold her tightly, my hand running over her back soothingly. “I’ve been trying to think of a way to tell you, but I guess you’ve already heard the news.”
She nods, her grip on me tightening. I inhale deeply as I drop my forehead to hers. “Don’t cry, baby,” I whisper. “My heart can’t take it. You’re killing me.”
She sniffs and looks up at me through her tears. “I did this,” she murmurs. “I did this to you.”
I cup her cheeks and swipe at her tears with my thumbs. “I’m a grown man, Amara. I knew what I was getting into when I showed up at your lab after you so vehemently pushed me away, trying to do the right thing. I could’ve let you walk away then, but I didn’t. Being with you is worth anything. It’s worth risking everything. Besides… I’m a doctor, baby. I’ll be okay. I’ll find something. It may take a while, but I’ll be okay. It was just a job.”
She shakes her head, her eyes falling closed. “It’s not that simple, Noah. My grandpa… he won’t let you find another job.”
I lean in and press a lingering kiss to her forehead, my eyes falling closed as my heart fills with love for the woman in front of me. She’s more hurt than I am. To have someone hurting on my behalf the way she does… it’s something I didn’t think I’d ever experience outside of my family.
“Baby, your grandfather isn’t all-powerful. I found you an investor, didn’t I? I can find myself a job. Everything is going to be okay.”
She nods, her eyes filled with hope. The sooner I find something, the better. I can tell this is going to be hard on Amara. She’s going to keep blaming herself until I find something new. It’ll hurt her more than it’ll ever hurt me.
I grab her chin and tilt her face toward mine, leaning in for a kiss. Amara sighs when my lips meet hers, and I smile against her lips, right before deepening the kiss. She opens up for me, her tongue brushing against mine. The way she kisses me is different tonight. Her touch is filled with desperation, with sadness.
I lift her into my arms and carry her to the staircase, pausing when I notice the bags in the hallway. I glance at her, and the look in her eyes has my heart working overtime.
“I left,” she tells me. “I’m done being a pawn in my grandfather’s games. I warned him that if he did this to you… he’d lose me. I meant it.”
“No,” she snaps. “I hate that you can’t see yourself through my eyes. Noah, you’re the most amazing man I’ve ever met. You’re the best person I know, and I’m honored I get to be with you. I wish you could see that. I wish you could see how amazing you are, how lucky I am to be with you.”
I smile at her and thread my hand through her hair, my eyes on hers. “I love you, Amara. I really do. But so does your grandfather. Don’t alienate your family over me. I’d give the world to have a family of my own, so don’t walk away from yours so easily.”
She looks at me, her eyes brimming with sincerity. “I’m your family now, Noah. And if my grandfather wants to, he can be part of our family too — as soon as he accepts us being together. This isn’t just about you, babe. It’s about me too. It’s about me choosing my own path and pursuing my own happiness. I’ve had enough, Noah. He can either support the road I’ve chosen, or he’ll have to get out of my way. I’m done trying to please my family at the expense of my happiness. I won’t sacrifice you.”
I stare at her, my heart overflowing with happiness, gratitude and love, all blended into what can only be described as pure bliss. I never thought I’d experience this… someone putting me first the way Amara does. “I love you,” I tell her. “You’re everything, Amara. Everything I’ve ever wished for, and then some.”
Dr. Grant (Off-Limits) Page 19