by Charity West
“I know, Hadley, and if there was any way to undo the last few hours, I would.”
“Don’t be too hard on him, Hads,” Mr. Ryan said. “He’s been here since he found out what happened, and I’m guessing he hasn’t left that chair the entire time.”
She looked from me to her dad and back again. “Tyler, I appreciate that you came here, but I think I need to be alone right now.”
My heart constricted. She was kicking me out? Was she just shutting me out of her hospital room or out of her life? I wasn’t sure I would survive without her.
“Hadley, please don’t do this. I know I seriously screwed up. If I hadn’t strung Alicia along for the last three years, then none of this would have happened. The only thing I can figure is that she thought we’d end up together … then she saw you and me together and knew it would never happen.”
Tears trickled down her cheeks. “And why wouldn’t it ever happen? You don’t really want me, Tyler. Remember, I’m just a means to an end. I’m sure your mom will back off on the military school thing. You don’t need to pretend to be interested in me anymore.”
“Don’t you get it, Hadley? I was never pretending.”
“You told me yourself we were going to strike a deal. A temporary arrangement to get Hunter to back off me and get your mom to forget about military school. I think we’ve accomplished those things. You’re free to go your own way now.”
I laced our fingers together. “I don’t want to go my own way, Hadley. I never did. I lied to you that day in the hall. You kissed me, and for the first time in my life, I thought I might have a chance with you. But when I pulled you out of class, I could tell by the look in your eyes that you were going to shut me out. So I came up with that stupid deal. Everything I’ve said and done in the last few days has been real, Hadley. I really do have feelings for you.”
“Tyler, I…”
I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers. Probably not the smartest move with her dad not six feet away, but I was determined to make her see I wasn’t lying, that I really did want her and only her.
Pulling away, I smiled down at her. “You’re what I want, Hadley. For real. You think I would ditch football practice and ruin my chances of playing in tomorrow’s game for just anyone? I should be in bed getting ready to play tomorrow, but I already know I’m not leaving this hospital until you do.”
She sniffled. “Yes, you are. I know how important tomorrow’s game is, and I don’t want to be responsible for our team losing because the captain was a no-show.”
“Hadley…”
She shook her head. “Listen to me, Tyler. I want you to play tomorrow. Don’t think about me lying here in the hospital. I want you to go and play, and I want you to win—for me. Can you do that? Can you win the game for me?”
My throat constricted and I nodded. She wasn’t throwing me out, wasn’t telling me to never darken her door again, and I took that as a great sign. I brushed my lips against hers again and told her goodnight, then let myself out into the hall. Mr. Ryan followed me, and I wondered if I was about to get a lecture on kissing his daughter.
“Hadley is right, Tyler. You need to be at that game tomorrow.”
“Yes, sir. I’m just not sure how focused I’ll be, knowing she’s stuck in here.”
“She’s going to be fine now.”
I could tell there was something he wasn’t telling me, and it made my stomach knot. Was there something wrong with Hadley that no one had said? Was there more to the poisoning?
“She’s going to be different when she goes back to school,” Mr. Ryan said. “I know she’s already classified as something of a geek, but it’s going to get worse when she’s cleared for classes.”
“Why?”
“I know she wouldn’t want me to tell you, but her mother said the Hemlock had already started to work on her by the time the ambulance arrived. The doctors saved her life, but they weren’t able to keep her completely whole. It’s affected her vision. Her mom told me Hadley kept saying everything looked fuzzy and that she couldn’t make out her mother’s face anymore. I don’t know how she knew that was you sitting beside her bed, maybe it was instinct, but I’m telling you right now, there was no way she recognized your face. Because she couldn’t see it.”
“But she’s going to be okay, right?”
Mr. Ryan nodded. “She’ll need glasses. Maybe in six months or so, after she’s fully mended and adjusted to the changes in her life then she can try contacts. If she wants to. I’m sure she’ll feel pressured by her peers at school to ditch the glasses as soon as possible. And don’t expect her at school until she has them. We’re going to do whatever we can to get a rush order put in. The hospital has an excellent vision center, and I’m sure they’ll work with us.”
“Tell Hadley that I’m here for her, whatever she needs. I won’t be able to stop by tomorrow after school because of practice, and then I’ll have to focus on the game, but as soon as we win I’m heading straight here.”
“I’m sure she’ll be happy to see you. She hasn’t said much about your relationship, and I think I can come to my own conclusions after your discussion in the room just now, but know that she really does care about you. Her mother and I have had several conversations about the two of you, and I’ll admit she’s been worried. Hadley liked you for a really long time, and her mother is worried you’re going to break Hadley’s heart.”
“I would never do anything to hurt, Hadley, sir. She’s too important to me.”
Mr. Ryan slapped me on the back and headed back into Hadley’s room, and I made my way to the elevator so I could go home, shower, and try to get my head in the game for tomorrow.
Chapter Seven
Hadley
“So, want to tell me about this deal you made with Tyler?” Dad asked as he came back into the room and reclaimed his chair.
My cheeks warmed as I thought about confessing to my dad that I’d agreed to fake date someone just to get rid of Hunter. One, it would be admitting Hunter was a bigger problem than I’d let on and two, it made me seem desperate that I couldn’t get a date unless it was a pretend one.
“It was just this stupid idea Tyler had. He knew Hunter was giving me trouble, and Tyler’s mom was threatening to send him to military school, so he came up with the idea of us pretend dating. But if anything he just said is true, then he hasn’t been pretending.”
“And how do you feel about that?”
I shrugged. Truthfully, I wasn’t sure. Yes, dating Tyler had always been a dream of mine, but if he wasn’t pretending, if he really wanted me as a girlfriend, then where did we go from here? It meant every conversation we’d had, every kiss, had all been real. I’d been falling for him all this time, and now it seemed my dreams really could come true, but I wasn’t sure I was ready for that just yet.
“He’s coming back tomorrow night, after the game,” Dad said.
“He should go to the after party with his friends.”
Dad smiled. “Honey, I doubt he wants to go to a party without his girlfriend. He’s worried about you.”
“I’m going to be fine.”
“You’re going to live, but there are going to be some changes in your life. I’m taking you downstairs tomorrow to have your eyes checked so we can go ahead and order your glasses.” He frowned. “You aren’t lying about how much you can still see, are you?”
Well, yeah. I kind of was. I had told him I couldn’t see details, but could still grasp the big picture. And while that was partially true, it wasn’t completely true. I could see the outline of a person and tell their skin or hair color. I had an idea of who they were based off those two things and their height, but until someone spoke I didn’t know for sure who was sitting beside me or who had walked into the room. I was terrified that glasses wouldn’t fix what was wrong with me. What if I was considered legally blind? That no amount of surgeries would fix my eyesight?
“Hads, you know that no matter what, your mother and I will always stand beside you. And
from what I’ve seen tonight, Tyler will too. You have people who care about you and want to help, but you have to let us.”
“I know, Dad. I promise to try, but there’s only so much you can do. It’s mostly going to be up to me to get up and carry on. You can’t live my life for me, and like you said, there are going to be some changes.”
“One day at a time, kiddo.”
I nodded, knowing he was right. There wasn’t much else I could do at this point. But what if I couldn’t read music anymore? I knew how to play by sound, but would future music teachers be willing to play a piece for me so I could copy it? This was going to completely change my future. I was scared, but I wasn’t going to admit that to anyone. I could tell Mom was barely hanging on, and I needed to be strong for her. Dad seemed to be putting on a brave face, but I was sure this affected him too. They’d gone from having a daughter who had no physical imperfections to one who couldn’t see.
I didn’t want to talk to Dad anymore, so I closed my eyes and pretended to sleep. It was really crappy of me, but I needed time to process everything.
Eventually I fell asleep, and then spent most of the next day sleeping as well. The hours crept by and I was eternally bored when I was awake. It was hard to watch TV when I couldn’t see it. And while I had a few visitors, I wasn’t feeling very cheerful or optimistic, so none of them stayed long.
As night progressed, I wondered how Tyler’s game was going. I was supposed to be in the stands, cheering him on, and yet I was stuck in this hospital bed. Mom had thought I would be released today, but after the doctors checked out my eyes a little more, they’d decided to keep me until morning. The news wasn’t good. I could wear glasses, but even with them I wouldn’t have 20/20 vision anymore. The optic nerves in my eyes were too damaged from the poison.
It was after eleven when Tyler entered the room, a vase of pink flowers clutched in his hand. I could feel tension coming off him, even if I couldn’t see his face.
“Are those for me?” I asked.
“I had Mom pick them up for me before the game. I wasn’t sure if the florist shop in the hospital would be open this late.” He set them on the bedside table. “They’re roses. She called and asked what color to get and I wasn’t sure, but I thought you might like pink.”
“The color is really pretty and they smell great, Tyler.”
He sat beside the bed and rubbed his hands up and down his thighs, his palms rasping against the denim of his jeans.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Nothing!”
“Tyler, something had to have happened since you left last night.”
He took my hand in his and caressed my fingers with his thumb. “There were some scouts in the bleachers tonight. Florida State University and University of Georgia both talked to me after the game.”
“What did they say?”
“They’ve offered me a full ride. I told them I wanted to stay closer to home.”
I squeezed his hand, knowing it was my fault he wasn’t going to take them up on their offer. He deserved to go somewhere far from our small Tennessee town. Someplace where you didn’t have to drive almost an hour just to go to a mall. I knew he felt responsible for what had happened to me, but it wasn’t his fault Alicia was completely crazy.
“You should go,” I finally said. “Before we started dating you’d planned to get out of the state and see the world. That shouldn’t change now. Especially after…”
“After what?” he asked.
“There’s a chance I won’t be able to play anymore, and if I can’t read music I won’t be able to read my textbooks either. My life is about to change, Tyler, and I don’t want to drag you down with me.”
“Hadley, there’s no reason you can’t go away with me to college. We could get an apartment together. Even if you can’t go to classes, we could find something you’d enjoy doing.”
“Tyler, I won’t be a burden to you. It’s best if I stay with my parents.”
He got up and sat on the bed, pulling me into his arms. I burrowed against him, loving the feel of his arms around me, the way his scent surrounded me. If Tyler left, I would miss this, but it wasn’t fair to ask him to stay behind. And go with him? How would I function out there on my own?
“Hadley, I know that the world just became a much scarier place for you. I get that, I really do. But if you’ll let me, I’ll help you. If you can’t manage school, I’ll come see you every day when it lets out. If you can’t go to college, I’ll help you find something you can do. As long as we’re together, I don’t care where we go. I can attend any college, as long as they accept me. Would a full ride to UGA be nice? You bet! But it isn’t something I have to have.”
“But tuition…”
He silenced me with a soft kiss. “Doesn’t matter. My parents have saved since I was born. My tuition is covered. The only benefit to going somewhere that’s paid in full is that I could use that fifty thousand to rent an apartment for us.”
“You really think we could make it work?” I asked, not sure I dared to hope.
“I really do. I’d have to go to practices, but you could come watch me if you wanted. And of course, I’d have to attend classes, but we’d be together every night. Depending on how I set up my schedule, maybe I’d have Fridays off and we could have a three day weekend to have some fun.”
“We have time to think about it,” I said. “I don’t want you to pass up a great opportunity because of me. Let’s see how things go with my eyesight, and how well I’m able to function day to day. There’s going to be an adjustment period. I can’t make plans for my future right now, Tyler. If you have to have an answer tonight, I’d have to say no.”
“It can wait. I won’t be able to hold off the colleges forever, but I can tell them I need some time, maybe even explain the situation to them.”
I pressed my lips to his then burrowed into him again.
“Just the fact that you’re willing to make a place for me in your future means a lot to me, Tyler.”
“There’s no one I’d rather be with than you, Hadley. You’re it for me. From now until forever, I want you in my life.” He smoothed the hair back from my face. “I love you, Hadley. I always have.”
I squeezed him tighter and blinked back tears. “I love you, too.”
I don’t know how long we stayed like that, just holding one another, but eventually my mother ran him out of the room and told him he could come back in the morning. I felt like I was floating after hearing those sweet words from Tyler. Despite the uncertainty of my future, everything was right in my world just then.
Chapter Eight
Tyler
Hadley came home from the hospital that next day and a week later she had her glasses. I could tell she was self-conscious about them, but she was still every bit as beautiful to me now as she’d been before Alicia tried to kill her. As for my ex, Hadley’s dad had hauled her away in cuffs, and her trial was set for two weeks. I knew there was no way she’d get off unless she used the insanity plea. As crazy as she was, she might actually be able to pull that one off. Maybe she’d end up in the same prison as Hunter. He’d been arrested the day after he’d slashed my tire.
The halls had been empty without Hadley. She’d only been back at school for a few days, and I knew she was struggling. Everyone was going out of their way to be nice to her though, even Colin. The girls I’d dated and dropped over the years all flocked around her, but I noticed no one dared bring her baked goods unless they came from a shop. Hadley was taking all of her fame in stride, but it was making her uncomfortable. I think she preferred it when she was invisible.
The cafeteria was packed when I got there, and I saw Hadley was already at a table with Amber. I made my way over to them, wanting to make sure she had everything she needed before I went through the line. Ever since I’d uttered those freeing words—I love you—I’d taken the role of boyfriend rather seriously. Actually, I’d gotten so serious about it that unbeknownst to Hadley, I
stopped at a jewelry story the other night and purchased something special for her. Something I was terrified to give her. I’d talked to my parents and hers before doing it, and thankfully, I had their support. If the circumstances were different, I imagine I’d have had a different outcome. But with Hadley needing constant care, I knew her parents were relieved she had me watching over her. And I did it gladly!
“Hadley, you aren’t eating?” I asked as I noticed she didn’t have a tray in front of her.
“The line was too crowded.”
I leaned down and kissed her cheek. “I’ll get you something. Just sit here with Amber.”
She smiled up at me gratefully and I hurried off to get something for us to eat. When I got in the line, people ushered me ahead of them until I’d nearly reached the front. It didn’t take long to get two trays, one with everything I knew Hadley liked, check out, and return to the table where she was sitting. I put her tray down in front of her and claimed the seat beside her.
“Thank you, Tyler,” she said softly.
“You know I’d do anything for you.” I smiled and kissed her softly.
Amber made kissy noises. “You two should get a room.”
Hadley’s cheeks flushed and I just laughed, thinking I wouldn’t mind getting a room with her. When she was ready, we’d talk about it. If everything that was said was true, then she was still a virgin. No way was I going to fool around in the bed of my truck with her. She was special, unlike the girls who had come before her.
“Practice today was cancelled,” I told her. “Want to go somewhere after school?”
“I just need to text Mom so she won’t worry.”
“Tell her I’ll take extra special care of you.”
Hadley leaned her head against my shoulder. “If she knows I’m with you, she won’t worry. Both of my parents have seen how wonderful you are. I think they’d keep you forever if they could. Have you noticed they’ve been sending you home later and later? It wouldn’t surprise me if they ask if you want to camp out in the living room with me one night, or use the guest room.”