Song of Praise

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Song of Praise Page 9

by Vanessa Miller


  The police officer nodded at RaShawn, he then asked, “Is that you, Judge Hartman?”

  “Bishop, why don’t you come in and join us?” Judge Hartman asked.

  RaShawn turned to the officer, he gave the okay and then RaShawn slowly opened the door to his office. He was caught off guard as he stood in the middle of his office staring at the gun in Judge Hartman’s hand and the glass of wine in Williams’ hand. “Don’t drink it, Marvel. It’s poison.”

  “What is wrong with you, Bishop Thomas? I thought you wanted him to repent and be cleansed from his sins?”

  “Not like this,” RaShawn told her.

  The officer pointed his gun at Judge Hartman. “I’m only going to say this once, ma’am. Put the gun down and then stand up.”

  “Who do you think you are… barging in where you have no jurisdiction? I will have your badge, officer.” Even while being caught red handed, Judge Hartman was cocky and unyielding.

  “Give it up, Mother. It’s over and you’re going to jail,” Britney told her.

  Still holding the gun, Judge Hartman shook her head with disdain. “Everything I’ve done has been for you. But you have always been so ungrateful and hateful where I’m concerned. What more do you want from me, Britney?”

  “You didn’t do anything for me. Everything… all of it has been about you and your career. You never should have had a kid in the first place.”

  “That’s what I tried to tell your father. But he promised to marry me if I had you. But we both know what a liar he turned out to be.”

  While Britney and Judge Hartman were arguing back and forth and the police officer stood there looking as if he didn’t know what to do next, the window in RaShawn’s office was quietly being raised. RaShawn glanced over and saw Detective Harris sliding through the window.

  Judge Hartman was so angry with Britney that she stood up, waving the gun around. “You ungrateful little—”

  “Put the gun down, Judge Hartman,” the police officer demanded, getting into a shooting stance.

  Judge Hartman was in no mood to listen. She turned to Marvel Williams and lifted the gun. Just before she pulled the trigger, Detective Harris lunged and knocked her to the ground. She was handcuffed and escorted out of the office.

  Britney followed behind the officers. RaShawn told Marcus and his sister that he would catch up with them in the sanctuary and then turned back to Marvel, who appeared to be in shock. “You can put the drink down now, Marvel.”

  But Marvel didn’t release the glass. Instead he stared at it as if it were the answer to all his problems. “I could drink this and be just fine with the outcome.”

  What do I do now, Lord? I didn’t see this coming, RaShawn silently prayed as he dropped down to the seat next to Marvel.

  Listen to him.

  “You don’t want to do this, Marvel. What you really need is someone to talk to… someone who will really listen. I’m ready to do that, if you’ll give me a chance.”

  “All you want to do is judge me. You don’t want to listen to me. I’m tired of people telling me how I let God down… nobody seems to care that God let me down.”

  “I care,” RaShawn said in a low, calm voice. “How did it happen?”

  Swirling the wine around in the glass, thoughts of bringing the glass to his lips and swallowing danced around his head. But before he did, Marvel decided to unburden himself. He turned to RaShawn and said, “What do you think of a man who takes care of God’s house while his own falls apart?”

  “I know it happens a lot.”

  “Some things should never happen.” Tears rolled down Marvel’s face as he admitted, “I thought having my wife with me while I traveled would keep women away from me. I never wanted to be the kind of preacher who cheats on his wife. But do you know what was happening to my son while we were out preaching from town to town for the Lord?”

  This is going to be bad, isn’t it Lord? RaShawn tried to keep the communication lines between him and God open, because he needed God’s help.

  It’s going to be bad. My son is hurting.

  “My father-in-law was molesting my son,” Marvel choked out the words through his tears. “The Christian community judges me for marrying my son to another man. But what else was I supposed to do? I left him with that monster. I am responsible for what he’s become, so I wasn’t just going to turn my back on him again.”

  RaShawn was crying right along with Marvel. He leaned closer to the man he had so harshly judged and said, “I get it now, Marvel. You’ve carried the guilt of this in your heart for too long.”

  “I wouldn’t have left him there, if I had known.”

  “I believe that. I’m sure your son knows that as well.”

  Anger boiled in Marvel and he barked, “God was supposed to protect my son.”

  “Your son was greatly wounded. I don’t discount that. But you can’t discount what God can do to heal him either.”

  “I prayed so many times for God to change his heart and mind about being gay, but it never happened.”

  “You know as well as I do that you can’t just stop praying. What was done to your son was wrong. He was condemned to a life he probably wouldn’t have chosen. But your not speaking out and telling him the truth with love, will condemn him to a hell that he won’t be able to get out of. So, which is worse?”

  “I don’t know,” Marvel cried out.

  “I know,” RaShawn told him. “The worst would be for you to die right now, and never have the chance to reconcile your relationship with God or to fight for your son’s eternal soul. Then you really would have abandoned him.”

  Marvel looked at the glass of wine once more. Suddenly it didn’t seem like the answer to all his problems. He put the drink down. Sat there for a minute trying to compose himself. Then he stood up. “I don’t know if you’re right or not, but if I die today, I’ll never know. I’m going to go apologize to my son, and then I need to do what Marson did and talk to God… find out what path I’m supposed to take.”

  RaShawn picked up the glass and poured the contents out the window.

  Chapter Fifteen

  “You did good,” Britney told him as she came into his office and Marvel walked out. She had just watched the police drive off with her mother. The whole ordeal made her want to just break down and cry. But she’d already shed too many tears over her mother’s actions.

  “How much did you hear?”

  “Enough to understand his pain. I’ll be praying for him and his son.” Britney leaned against the cabinet as her head began to swim. She was seeing double and needed to steady herself.

  “I wish I had known what he was dealing with. I’d like to think that I would’ve had a little more compassion.”

  Her head was pounding now, but she tried not to show it. “Like you just told Marvel, don’t let the guilt eat you alive. The way I see it, we can’t do anything about the past. But we can all move forward and let the Lord heal and cleanse us.”

  He walked over to her. “Thank you for being here with me.” Leaning into her, RaShawn gently kissed her lips. They then held on to each other like nothing else mattered but that moment.

  But when he released her, she stumbled backward, and then grabbed hold of RaShawn’s shirt, trying to steady herself.

  “I figured I was a good kisser, but I had no idea that I could actually make someone swoon,” he said jokingly.

  “I-I think I need a doc—” she dropped to the floor before she could finish her statement.

  As RaShawn watched Britney drop to the floor, it was as if his heart went with her. She couldn’t be dead. Judge Hartman was on her way to jail, no way was he going to allow her to add one more victim to her list. He knelt down and felt for a pulse all the while praying for God to step in.

  The pulse was there… it was faint, but still a living-you’ve-still-got-a-fighting-chance kind of pulse. He scooped Britney off the floor, grabbed his keys and ran like the church was on fire. He didn’t know what could have
caused Britney to suddenly faint like that, but he knew one thing for sure. He wasn’t about to stand by and let her die… not like the others. He was here and he was going to do something.

  “Where are you going? Marson is wrapping up. We need you in there to close us out for the day.” His secretary practically chased him as he ran out of the church.

  He placed Britney on the passenger’s seat then ran to the driver’s side while telling his secretary, “I’ve got to get her to the hospital. Tell Senior Bishop Brown to close us out.” RaShawn jumped in the car and went from zero to sixty in a matter of seconds. He had no time to spare… had to get Britney to the hospital.

  Britney’s eyes fluttered as she grabbed hold of her head. “W-what happened?”

  “It’s my mom. She drug me. But I thought it was wearing off.” Britney yawned and closed her eyes again.

  He shook her. “Stay with me, Britney. Don’t go back to sleep. Okay?”

  “I’m tired,” she said as she nodded back off.

  Holding on to the wheel with one hand and shaking Britney with the other, he tried his best to wake her up, but she wasn’t coming back to him this time.

  “Sweet, sweet Jesus, don’t let me down. Don’t let her die on me.” And in the instant he not only had compassion for Marvel Williams, but he understood how the man could have gone so far away from the will of God. If God didn’t help Britney after all the years he’d spent on the mission field and behind a pulpit in service to Him, then RaShawn didn’t know what that meant for the future.

  He pulled into the emergency area of the hospital, jumped out of the car, carried Britney in his arms into the hospital hollering, “Help, I need help!”

  A nurse had a bed brought out and Britney was wheeled through the double doors. RaShawn tried to follow, but the nurse asked him to stay behind and fill out the hospital forms. “Okay, but you need to know that she was drugged. I don’t know what was used but she’s not doing good.”

  “Thanks for telling me,” the nurse said. “We’ll take it from here.”

  RaShawn didn’t want to leave Britney in their hands. He wanted to demand that he be allowed to follow, but he also didn’t want to get in the way. So, he filled out the paperwork with as much information as he knew, then paced the floor waiting for the doctors to tell him something.

  God had to come through for Britney. RaShawn and Britney had grown close over the last two years and he cared very deeply for her. The last time he lost someone he cared so deeply about was when he had been ten and his mom died. That loss had brought him closer to God. But could his faith handle another blow like that?

  Realizing that he was on shaky ground, RaShawn gave the emergency room attendant his cell phone number and told her he would be in the chapel. Once he arrived at the chapel, RaShawn prostrated himself before the altar. Through tears and sweat, he prayed for Britney, begging the Lord to hear his plea and spare her life.

  After he finished praying for Britney, he sat on one of the pew seats and prayed for himself. Because if things didn’t turn out the way he wanted them to, RaShawn didn’t want to stray away from His Lord and Savior. He didn’t want anything to come between the relationship he’d built with his heavenly Father. Too many of his fellow preachers had allowed personal tragedies to steer them away from God and away from their mission. RaShawn refused to give up his mission, there were too many lives at stake. So, even though he very clearly knew what outcome he wanted for this situation, he found himself saying, “Your will be done, My Lord. Whatever it is, I will accept it.”

  He’d done all he could do, so he headed back to check on Britney. RaShawn was drained as he re-entered the emergency room. He barely had strength to make it to the check-in desk to ask about Britney. But just as the woman behind the check-in desk was telling him that there was no change in Britney’s condition, someone touched his arm.

  Turning around, RaShawn was blessed to see Mama-Carmella and his Dad. “Marcus is parking the car. We came as soon as your secretary told us what had happened.”

  RaShawn had never been so glad to see anyone. He hugged Mama-Carmella. And then went to his dad. The two men hugged. RaShawn tried to stay strong, but as his father wrapped his arms around him and said, “It’s going to be alright, son,” RaShawn could do nothing to stop the tears that fell like a waterfall. “What am I going to do if something happens to her, Dad?”

  “Britney is going to be fine,” Ramsey told him. “You’ve got to believe that.”

  Overwhelmed, RaShawn sat down and put his hands to his face. He held them there until he calmed down and then wiped the tears from his face. Carmella sat down next to him and put her hand on his arm. “You do believe, don’t you?”

  After talking with Marvel and realizing that sometimes God doesn’t solve our problems, RaShawn had feared that this might be one of those times. But he hadn’t been raised to doubt God. No matter how difficult the situation was, RaShawn had to believe in the God he served. He nodded. “I believe. Britney will survive.”

  As if God had been waiting for RaShawn to make his declaration, the double doors opened and the doctor walked over to him. “Are you RaShawn?”

  Standing up, RaShawn said, “Yes. Is Britney okay?”

  The doctor smiled. “She’s asking for you. But she’s a little sore right now because we had to pump her stomach. She’s going to be our guest for a few days.”

  ***

  Once Britney had been assigned a room, his family left the hospital so he could spend time with her without being overwhelmed by having too many people in her room. He sat with her for hours. He was willing to talk about anything Britney wanted. And he never once brought up her mother, because he didn’t want to upset her.

  But Britney needed to talk about it, so after about an hour she said, “I still can’t believe my mother is as evil as she is.”

  “I never would have guessed that she was the Avenger of Sins, not in a million years. After all, she was ticked at me for firing your uncle.”

  “He’s not my uncle.”

  “What do you mean?” RaShawn’s eyebrows went up. “Every time I talked to Tony Hartman, all he did was brag about his beautiful niece.”

  Pain etched across Britney’s face as she told him, “Tony was my father. My mother killed him because he was finally going to tell me the truth and come clean to everyone. But in true fashion, Judge Lisa Hartman wasn’t about to let a scandal cost her the career she had built.”

  To say that he was shocked would have been a great understatement. But he kept himself from gawking as he said, “If that’s the reason she killed Tony, then why the whole Avenger of Sins charade, and why kill the other men?”

  “My mother is a very complicated woman who has been hurt by men who claimed to be servants of God. When I saw that ‘you do right and I won’t do wrong’ phrase at Linden’s house it shook me because I knew I had heard it before… my stepfather used to say that to me and my mother when he wanted us to do something that he knew we didn’t want to do. I must have repressed that memory, but while my mother had me drugged out of my mind, it came back to me.”

  “I’m so sorry that you had to grow up with that man.”

  “You and me both,” she responded. “My mother probably wouldn’t have done the things she did, had she not been married to that monster.” Shaking her head, Britney added, “I guess she figured she was doing the world a service by killing those other preachers along with Tony.”

  “So, do you think we were right about the reason Daniel Marson didn’t get killed?” he asked.

  “Since she’s a judge it makes sense to me. She knew he wasn’t guilty of anything, so even a person as crazy as she obviously couldn’t go against her sense of justice.”

  It was crazy all right, that so many men had to die so that Judge Hartman could keep her secrets. He prayed that the woman spent a long time in prison and that she truly found Jesus while she was there… maybe he would go into prison ministry.

  “I’m going to l
et you get some sleep, but I’ll be back in the morning,” RaShawn told her as he stood to leave.

  The next morning RaShawn arrived at the hospital bright and early with a dozen roses. The morning after that he brought lilies. On the third morning, he brought orchids.

  “You’re spoiling me,” Britney told him as she was preparing to be released. “When I get home I’m going to be looking for you to bring me flowers in the morning.”

  “I’ll do it. What kind would you like tomorrow?” RaShawn asked, totally serious. Each day as he came to the hospital and sat with Britney and became mesmerized by her ability to weather the storm in her life, he realized that he didn’t just care for her, he loved her and wanted nothing more than to be with her every day for the rest of his life.

  She shook her head. “No more flowers, please. But you know, we never did go to dinner.”

  “I like the sound of dinner,” RaShawn told her, “But I think I need a longer commitment from you than that.”

  “Oh my God, he’s about to pop the question,” came the voice of Mama-Carmella from behind him.

  RaShawn and Britney turned toward the open door and were greeted by the gawking eyes of his family, plus Rita and Tyler. “How long have you all been standing there?”

  “We knew Britney was being released from the hospital today. So, we wanted to come and see her before she left,” Ramsey said.

  “And I came to take her home,” Rita said.

  Then Raven said, “That’s right, little bro, Britney is about to leave town, so I suggest you get on with this. The Marshall-Thomas family needs another wedding in our lives.”

  “You heard her,” RaShawn said as he pulled Britney into his arms. “My family loves weddings. So, what do you say, huh? How about it?”

  “Boy, if you don’t stop being silly and get down on one knee,” Mama-Carmella said.

  But Britney stopped him from bending down. “You had me at ‘huh,’ and ‘how about it’ was just the icing on the cake. Of course I’ll marry you… but I do have one condition.”

 

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