by Helen Lacey
Tanner dropped his keys and hat onto the hall stand. “I thought we could go out.”
What did that mean? She tilted her head, and as the towel fell in her hands her hair cascaded around her shoulders. The movement seemed to stop him in his tracks. He watched her intently and heat quickly fanned through her blood. One look, she thought. That’s all it takes. Damn Tanner McCord and his beautiful hide.
She quickly pulled herself together. “Out?”
“To the Rosemount Rodeo,” he explained. “Ruthie’s competing in a senior’s team penning event and I thought it would be nice to cheer her on.”
Which didn’t explain why he was on her doorstep. “So, this would be a date?”
Color slashed his cheeks. He was embarrassed. Was she so undatable? “Well...no...only in the way that we’d be together.”
“Like a date?” she said and smiled, and then let him off the hook. “I can’t get a sitter for Oliver at this time of—”
“The baby comes, too, of course,” he said. “It’s something of a family event anyhow. He’ll be quite safe.”
Cassie shook her head. “I don’t know... I’ve only just put him down for a nap and I’m not dressed and I probably—”
“I’ll wait,” he said easily.
She was about to refuse and then changed her mind. What was the harm? And it beat spending another lonely Saturday night alone. “Okay. Give me half an hour.”
It took nearly forty minutes, but by then she was changed into a long denim skirt and pale blue sweater and had put on makeup, styled her hair and got Oliver ready.
“Impressive,” Tanner remarked when she came into the living room. “Just over half an hour and you’re done.”
“Thirty-eight minutes, to be exact. So, are we taking my car or yours?”
“Mine,” he replied. “I had a baby seat fitted this morning.”
Cassie didn’t hide her surprise. “You did? Why?”
He shrugged loosely. “For Oliver. I’ll leave it with you when I go home.”
Cassie tried to ignore the way her insides contracted at the idea of him returning to South Dakota. Of course she knew it was inevitable. He would leave and she and Oliver would be alone again.
Once they were outside, he lifted Oliver from her arms and gently strapped him into the baby seat she recognized as an expensive brand and one she hadn’t been able to afford when she’d purchased the basic model that was buckled in the back of her old Honda.
“Incidentally,” he said once the back was shut and he’d opened the passenger door, “you look lovely.”
Cassie blushed. “You don’t look so bad yourself, cowboy.”
It was the grandest of understatements. In all her life Cassie had never found any man as attractive as she found Tanner. He was handsome, for sure, but there was something about him that appealed to her on a sensory level. While Doug had been charming and loud and always looking for attention, his brother was quieter and clearly more at home in his own skin. Gone was her idea that Tanner was some kind of disinterested loner. He was, in fact, the complete opposite. He liked company. He was funny and kind and just a little bullheaded and the more time she spent with him the more she liked him.
More than that.
Cassie knew she was in danger of falling for him...and it scared her to pieces.
By the time they reached the Rosemount Rodeo the sun was going down. There was a show ground attached to the horse arena and Cassie spotted a Ferris wheel and a few other recognizable carnival rides. A male voice was talking on the loudspeaker and there was music coming from a small stadium behind a sideshow alley. Tanner found a parking space close to the entrance gates, and once they got Oliver settled in his stroller he called Ruthie on the phone and they made their way toward the rows of stables and corrals. They stopped by the competitors’ gate and waited.
“Ruthie should be along soon. She’s only in one event,” he explained and positioned himself in front of her and the stroller so they were out of the way of horses and riders passing by.
Cassie didn’t mind. Having grown up in Crystal Point, the smell of horses and cattle was a familiar one and she liked the carnival atmosphere created by the riders, spectators and animals.
“It’s fine,” she said and smiled. “Thanks for getting me out of the house. I’ve become something of a hermit since Oliver was born.”
“Managing a newborn alone couldn’t have been easy.”
She shrugged and glanced at Oliver gurgling happily in his stroller. “I had Lauren and M.J. on standby if I needed help. And he’s such a good baby I really can’t complain.”
“You’re an excellent mom,” he said softly and touched her shoulder. “He’s a lucky kid.”
“Thanks,” she said and felt the heat of his touch right through to her bones. “But I’m simply flying by the seat of my pants. He makes it easy. And you’ve made it easier, too,” she said, smiling as she reached up and laid her hand on his chest. His heart pounded beneath her palm. The beat was strong and steady. Like everything about him. “So, thank you.”
“Tanner!”
At the sound of someone calling his name she dropped her hand to her side like a stone. They both turned to find a middle-aged couple standing about twenty feet away, waving their arms in a way that indicated they knew him. She looked at Tanner and saw his expression harden instantly.
“Be back in a minute,” he said and began to move off.
Cassie grasped his arm. “Is everything okay?”
“Fine,” he assured her and gently removed her hand. “Stay here. I’ll be back soon.”
She stayed put and watched him stride across the gravel. The couple, a man and woman in their late fifties, greeted him with what looked like genuine joy. She watched with interest as he shook the man’s hand and lightly kissed the woman’s cheek. So, he did know them. And quite well by the look of things. She pushed back the tiny surge of exclusion and fiddled with the strap on her tote while keeping a discreet eye on Tanner and his friends.
“There you are!”
Ruthie Nevelson’s voice quickly distracted her. The older woman was striding toward her, dressed in moleskins, a bright orange shirt and fancy vest with diamantés sewn across the lapel.
“Hi, Ruthie.”
She reached them and grinned widely. “I’ve been looking forward to seeing this young fella again.” As she peered into the stroller, Oliver gurgled. “I’m pleased Tanner talked you into coming.”
“Me, too,” she said and smiled.
“Where is he?”
Cassie pointed to where he stood, now deep in conversation with his friends. “There.”
Ruthie frowned and her hands moved to her bony hips. “Oh...I know them. That’s Malcolm and Sue Stewart.”
“Who?”
“Leah’s parents. Awful business, what happened to that girl. Broke poor Tanner’s heart. Worse thing he did was introduce her to that no good—” Ruthie stopped and looked as though she’d said something she shouldn’t have. “I better get—”
“Who’s Leah?” Cassie asked quickly, figuring she must have been more than a friend and getting more curious by the second.
Ruthie waved a hand dismissively. “Oh, just an old friend of Tanner’s. Well, best I get back to my horse. I’ll see you later at the dance.”
“Dance?”
“Sure,” she said and winked. “I’m going to watch this young man,” she said and pointed to Oliver. “While you dance with that young man,” she added and gestured toward Tanner. “See you later.”
Once she’d disappeared from view Cassie turned her attention back to Tanner and saw he was now on his way back to her. When he reached her he was smiling, but Cassie saw the tension in his jaw.
“Sorry about that.”
“Who are they?”
He shrugged. “Just some people I used to know.”
“People?” Her brows came up.
“Parents of an old friend,” he said vaguely. “We should go and get s
eated before—”
“Leah’s parents?”
He stilled instantly. “How do you know that? Did Doug say something to you about—”
“What’s Doug got to do with it?” she asked as her skin prickled with an unexpected sense of apprehension. “Ruthie was just here and said something about it. Tanner, who’s Leah?” she asked again.
“Just an old friend, like I said.”
“An old girlfriend?” she corrected, oblivious to the people walking by. “Right?”
“Yes.”
“Your old girlfriend? And something bad happened to her?”
“I’d rather not—”
“Tell me,” she insisted. “What happened? What’s the big secret? Why did Ruthie look like she’d said something she shouldn’t?”
“I have no idea,” he said flatly. “And it’s not important so let’s—”
“Leah was your girlfriend?” she asked, pushing relentlessly for more information. “And then?”
His eyes darkened so they were almost black and his jaw looked so tight it could have been carved from granite. “She got pregnant and lost the baby. Afterward she had a kind of breakdown and has been in and out of hospitals ever since.”
Cassie gripped his forearm. “Oh, God, Tanner...I’m so sorry. I didn’t know you’d lost a child. Now I understand why it’s so important to you that Oliver—”
His expression was unreadable as he shook his head. “I didn’t lose a child. She did. The baby wasn’t mine.”
Cassie’s blood stilled in her veins. “Not yours? Then who...?”
As her words trailed the thought of the most unimaginable betrayal flashed through her mind. No. It couldn’t be. She looked at him and shook her head, not wanting to believe it.
But saw the terrible truth in his eyes.
Chapter Nine
“It was Doug?”
Tanner flinched. “Yes.”
She looked at him, her eyes huge in her face and every old hurt he’d ever felt he saw in her expression. “That’s the history between you... It’s not about the inheritance. It was about a girl?”
He nodded and reached down to ease Oliver from the stroller. “She fell in love with him. We were young and just out of school and I guess he was older and experienced and more exciting to her.”
“Did Doug love her, too?”
“He never said,” Tanner replied, hating how the lie tasted in his mouth. Doug had said he’d loved Leah. Just as he’d said he’d loved Cassie. But he wasn’t about to tell her any more. Or how Doug had told Leah to terminate her pregnancy and then promptly broke off their affair when she said she wanted to keep the baby. Cassie would work out the pattern of Doug’s behavior in a heartbeat.
He held Oliver close to his chest and experienced an almost painful surge of love for the little boy. He remembered how Leah’s parents had remarked what a lovely family he had and Tanner hadn’t corrected them.
If only it were true...
If Cassie and Oliver were his he would never let them go. But they weren’t. She’d loved Doug. As Leah had.
Admit it...you’d be her consolation prize.
“He never told me any of this,” she said. “Not a word. I didn’t know him at all.”
Tanner wasn’t about to agree with her. “Come on, let’s get seated. We don’t want to miss Ruthie’s ride.”
“Tanner, I—”
“Later,” he said and grabbed her hand. “This isn’t the place to have this discussion. We’ll talk about it later.”
She nodded and they walked into the stands, finding a spot that was close to the exit in case they needed to leave in a hurry. Ruthie’s event was on a few minutes later and Tanner watched with pride as his friend came out and cut the tagged beasts out of the herd, and then worked with her team to corral them well within the allocated time.
Afterward, they headed for the sideshow alley, where Tanner won a stuffed pelican for Oliver on the horseshoe toss and a pair of oversize hot-pink sunglasses for Cassie on the rifle range. They spent a leisurely hour together and it only served to amplify every buried feeling he had for her. He fought the urge to hold her hand and instead carried Oliver while she perused the craft stalls. He knew she was tense. He could see it in her walk and the tight way she held her shoulders back. And he knew she was thinking about Doug. And about Leah.
But it wasn’t the time or place to have that conversation.
When she was done with the sideshow ally they made their way toward the food tent, and once they found seats he bought them burgers and fries while she gave Oliver his bottle. Ruthie turned up and when they finished eating they all moved to where the band was playing. By now Oliver was asleep and tucked in his stroller, and Ruthie waved them onto the dance floor.
“Are you sure?” Cassie asked him. “Your leg isn’t—”
“It’s fine,” he lied, thinking his leg ached like the devil because he’d done way too much walking for one evening. But the idea of holding Cassie in his arms just once was too tempting to refuse. She didn’t protest and when they reached the dance floor the song changed to a slower ballad.
“I did warn you, remember,” she reminded him, “that I couldn’t dance.”
Tanner smiled and drew her in his arms. “And remember what I said? Just sway.”
He wrapped his arms around her and could feel every lovely curve as he drew her closer. Tanner rested one hand on her hip and linked the other with hers. They danced slowly, not speaking, just moving together as if they’d danced a hundred times before. It struck him profoundly how effortless it was to be with her. How natural it was to hold her. And how easy it would be to kiss her. When the song ended she pulled back and looked up at him.
“Thank you,” she said. “It’s been a long time since I’ve done that. But I think I’d like to go now. We really need to talk and I’d like to do it at home.”
Tanner nodded and they left the dance floor. It took fifteen minutes to say their goodbyes to Ruthie, collect Oliver and head back to the car. And another thirty minutes to reach Crystal Point. He pulled into the driveway and once they were out of the car she took the baby inside and put him to bed. By the time he’d fed Mouse and let the dog outside, she was in the lounge room, pacing the floor.
“Is Oliver settled?” he asked from the doorway.
“Yes.” She remained standing, arms crossed, chin raised. “Did you find out about what Doug had done with Leah before or after he stole your inheritance?”
Straight to the point. A trait of hers he’d come to recognize. “After. Before. It was all around the same time.”
Her gaze narrowed. “So, he stole your money and your girlfriend and got her pregnant?”
“Yes.”
She dropped down onto the love seat in the corner. “I think I need to throw up.”
Tanner moved into the room and stood behind the sofa. “It was a long time ago.”
“Which doesn’t change how utterly despicable it was.”
“No,” he said. “But time does alter perspective on things.”
She shook her head and stared at him. “So you simply forgive and forget and move on?”
“Or get bogged down with anger and resentment,” he replied. “And that’s no way to live.”
She twisted her hands in her lap. “I feel like... I feel like I suddenly know nothing of the man I knew, the man who fathered my son. The man you describe...he’s a stranger. He’s a cold, unfeeling stranger who did whatever he wanted and didn’t care who got hurt in the process.”
“Then don’t remember him that way,” Tanner said and came around the sofa. “Remember him as the man who made you laugh. The man you loved.”
“How can I?” she implored. “I’d be living a lie. How could I love a man who did such things? That would make me...pathetic.”
“Or human.”
She jumped to her feet. “Stop that. Stop making excuses...for Doug...for me. Stop being so forgiving and get mad at him!”
The passio
n in her voice shifted the mood in the room on some kind of invisible axis. Tanner stared at her, wholly aware of her in a deep, soul-wrenching way. She was angry and confused and he watched as her rage gathered momentum. He knew that about her. He knew she was passionate and spirited and not the quiet wallflower his brother had often described. Around him she was fiery and full of life. She was combative and argumentative and stirred his blood and libido. And he wanted her. In his arms. In his bed. In his life.
Suddenly she was in front of him, hands on hips, her cheeks ablaze, chest heaving as she drew in large gulps of air. Heat swirled between them and without thinking he grasped her shoulders and pulled her close. Her arms dropped and then she was against him, breast to chest. And he claimed her lips. As he’d done when they were thirteen. As he’d imagined a thousand times since.
And she kissed him back. She opened her mouth and let him inside. She wound her tongue around his and groaned low in her throat when his hands moved down her arms and settled around her back, drawing her closer. There was heat and passion and urgency in the kiss. And it went on and on. He didn’t stop. She didn’t pull away. Her hands were on his shoulders and she sighed against his mouth in complete and utter surrender.
And in that moment Tanner knew he was done for.
He loved her.
And there was no going back. Nowhere to run. No part of his mind or body that could conceal what he’d tried so hard to deny for so long.
“Cassandra...” He whispered her full name against her lips. “Let me stay tonight. I want to make love to you so much.”
And that’s when she froze.
She wrenched free and stepped back. “Why?” she asked, breathless and suspicious.
Tanner stared at her. “Why?” He repeated her question. “Why do you think?”
She took another step backward. “That’s what I’m asking. Why?” She took a deep breath. “Payback maybe?”
“Payback? What does that mean?”
“You get into my bed,” she shot back, eyes blazing, “like Doug got into Leah’s all those years ago.”
Disbelief surged through him. “That’s ridiculous. You don’t actually believe I would do that to you?”