by Dina James
Rebecca shrugged. “Nana’s books say that reading is a useful ability and that wounds aren’t the only thing Healers are capable of reading. You can get into my head. What’s so scary about me being able to get into yours when I try?”
“This wasn’t ‘reading’,” Sydney replied with a scowl. “You were in my thoughts, seeing what I knew! Compelling me to answer!”
“And that’s a big deal why, exactly?” Rebecca asked, shaking her head as she went and sat on the bed. She dabbed at Ryan’s forehead with a fresh damp cloth. “You keep saying I’ve got all this power, and have this Seer ability. Maybe it’s got something to do with that.” Rebecca looked at Syd with an impish grin. “Maybe I’m the most powerful Healer ever!” Syd didn’t smile at her teasing. He just continued to stare at her, his shock clear upon his face. When he spoke, it wasn’t with amusement, only awe. “Maybe you are.”
He was silent for a long moment, then reached down and brushed her hair away from the Healer’s mark on her neck.
“What—” she began.
“Hush,” he said, and offered his hand to her.
Unsure, Rebecca set the cloth aside and took his hand. Syd helped her stand and led her around the framed curtain that separated Ryan’s bed from the rest of the enclave.
“Would you consent to replenish me, Most Powerful Healer Ever?” he asked.
Rebecca swallowed hard. His eyes weren’t dark, but neither were they as bright as she’d seen, nor were they pulsing like a heartbeat as they normally did. He didn’t really need feeding. He was perfectly fine. Still, he had asked, and it wasn’t in Rebecca to refuse.
In fact, something in her leapt and filled her with a warm wanting.
Yes, please, it said. Yes.
Rebecca just nodded, not trusting herself to speak.
“My gratitude to thee,” Syd replied, and bent his head low. “Even now, though not of age, you quite literally radiate power. Even just standing here beside you is somewhat soothing, though I admit it merely makes me hunger all the more.”
Rebecca just stood there, trembling and unsure. She’d said he could take her blood. Why wasn’t he doing it? And why was she so nervous? She’d fed him before.
Yes, but those times it was your idea, she reminded herself. Now he’s asking.
“Yes, I’ve asked, and you’ve consented, but I’ll make it even easier for you. Do you, Acolyte, offer to restore my power through your own life’s force of your own free will? Now, you say ‘Yes, I do.’ That is, if you are indeed giving your consent.”
“Yes, I do,” Rebecca said, though her voice shook a little.
Sydney reached for her hand. Instead of bringing her wrist to his lips as she’d done earlier for Ryan, Sydney brought her hand to rest on his shoulder, as though they were about to begin a dance. She marveled for a moment at how tall he was.
He reached with his other hand and brushed her hair back from her neck again. He smiled and looked into her eyes.
“I won’t hurt you,” he whispered.
Rebecca nodded, unable to take her eyes away from his. They were compelling, almost luminous. They seemed to glow from inside. It was quite beautiful the way the deep blue outside gave way to the lighter blue glow in the middle.
Sydney pulled her close to him and brought her other arm up around his neck. He returned his arms to her waist. “Willing prey is always more rewarding. Resistance erodes the life-force, and you have so much to give.
Thank you for sharing it with me.”
His words faded away as he lowered his mouth to her neck. As his lips touched her skin, she squirmed a bit, uncomfortable with his closeness and his very obvious longing. She had to remind herself that she’d agreed to this, that he needed this. He’d helped her nana. But what if he were lying to her? What if he’d had her get rid of Nana just so he’d have her alone, to—
Her stiffness and feeble attempt to pull away from him seemed to force Syd to focus again.
“Shh,” he soothed. “You are not a kill. You are a Healer. You are not a common human. Still your mind. Quiet your thoughts. You would know if I were lying to you. So many, so very many, Acolyte, would simply take this from you violently—force your consent with pain or torture. So few take pleasure in it. Let me savor this. Let me enjoy. Savor it yourself, and learn.
That’s what you want, isn’t it? To learn...?”
Rebecca nodded in mute agreement, not even caring what he’d said about killing. She shivered and closed her eyes, fighting the sluggish warmth that made her arms heavy and legs feel like they were going to go out from under her any moment.
“Promise me I will not regret it,” she mumbled as she felt herself relax into his hold.
He smiled at her and somehow she knew that the formal request for assurance came far too late in the asking. She had already consented. He would have to teach her about that, too. Later. She was frightened and confused enough, and she could feel that he really was desperately hungry. He probably couldn’t stop now even if he wanted to.
“Upon my honor, my lady,” he assured her with a strangled whisper in spite of his overwhelming need. Then he fell silent as his fangs pierced her throat, just over the mark on her neck.
She gasped, and was surprised that there was no pain as there had been when Ryan’s had done the same thing to her wrist.
He is a fledgling, and inexperienced, she heard Syd say in her mind. It doesn’t have to hurt. It certainly doesn’t have to hurt you , Acolyte.
What was with that? He called Nana “Lady Healer.” Was it kind of the same thing? Or was he still making fun of her?
Even if she’d been able to speak, she didn’t have to ask the questions aloud. She knew he would hear her thinking.
It is the term one uses with an untrained Healer, Syd replied in her mind.
Now hush, and relax. Enjoy.
Oh, it was enjoyable. Oh, man, was it enjoyable. Rebecca hadn’t ever felt anything like it. On and on it went. It was warm, light, exhausting and invigorating all at the same time.
Her arms tightened about his neck and she gave herself completely over to him. His arms did the same about her waist, taking her weight as her legs ceased to support her.
Liquid fire coursed through her. For one insane moment she was filled with panic at the onslaught. Syd trembled against her.
She felt his hold on her tighten a bit more as an unfamiliar feeling washed over her. Then Syd lifted his head, disengaging his fangs. His tongue parted his lips and he licked the wound. She could feel the two punctures he’d made closed in an instant, leaving clear, unblemished skin behind. He did it again, taking any remaining trace of blood or power with him, then rested his head on her shoulder.
“My gratitude,” he murmured, soft and formal. “You are...unbeliev-able...”Rebecca could hardly keep her eyes open. His soft voice was compelling and so wonderful to listen to. She smiled. How nice it felt to be appreciated for something. Anything. She noticed his blue eyes were again bright and glowing, almost pulsating in time with her beating heart.
“Anytime,” she managed to mumble.
“Power such as yours is bound to attract all manner of unwanted attention,” she heard him say. “All manner of evil things from the dark depths of the Otherworlds. Damn it, I will not have it! I knew, but I didn’t realize...” He looked down at her. “I’ll have to teach you to better conceal your power.
What I’ve just taken from you isn’t nearly enough to obscure how much you still harbor within you. One of many more things I have to teach you...” Rebecca could have listened to his voice forever, but powerful or no, she didn’t have the ability to keep her eyes open a moment longer, and fell asleep in his arms.
chApter FiFteen
After a long, much-needed shower, Rebecca went into the kitchen.
There was a huge brown beast standing at the counter, drinking coffee straight from the pot.
“Gross, Billy!”
“What?” He wiped his furry chin on the back of his hand.
“Get a mug!” Rebecca said, pointing to the cabinet near his head.
Billy snorted. “Those things don’t hold more than a mouthful for me, Bit, and I ain’t gonna stand here and pour myself ten drinks when one will do just fine! Besides, cups are for humans!”
“Then get a bowl or something instead of drinking right out of the pot. You could at least act like a civilized being.” Rebecca crossed her arms over her chest.
“I ain’t no ‘civilized being’! But since it bugs you so much, look! I’ll wash it!”
Billy rinsed the coffee pot under the sink and made a big show about wiping off the rim where his lips had been.
The phone rang.
Rebecca rolled her eyes at him as she answered it. “Hello?”
“Hello, little dove.”
“Nana! How are you?”
“Fine, fine,” her grandmother said. “Having a grand time here. It’s nice to see Gretchen and our other friends. We’re finally getting together for a real bridge game tonight. Enough about me. How are you?”
“I’m good,” Rebecca said. She wished she could take the phone in the other room, but Billy’s anubi ears would still hear what she was saying.
“I...um...haven’t been back to school. Syd doesn’t think it’s a good idea until Monday.”
“I don’t like the idea of not being there for your birthday tomorrow,” Nana said. “But...”
Nana trailed off and Rebecca wondered if there wasn’t someone else in the room.
“Rebecca,” Nana went on, her tone very serious. “I want you to listen to Syd and do just what he tells you. He’ll keep you safe. Is Billy still there?”
“Uh-huh,” Rebecca confirmed. “I...um...I kind of asked him to stay.
Like, for good.”
“Rebecca! You asked an anubi to den in your own home?!” Nana had to be alone. She wouldn’t talk about anubi if she weren’t.
“Yeah,” Rebecca replied, cringing inside. “Was that...wrong? Is it bad?”
“Not entirely,” Nana said. “It’s just, well...they have rules about sharing personal dwellings, and...and Billy has a sordid history. His brother—”
“Denis, I know,” Rebecca interrupted. “We’ve met.”
“I see,” Nana said.
Rebecca could tell she wasn’t happy about that.
“And you’re all right? Billy?”
“We’re all fine,” Rebecca assured her grandmother quickly. “It’s just...”
“What?”
“I um...I can’t really say...”
Because Billy’s standing right next to me, she thought. And it’s stupid, anyway.
“You’re not...you’re not starting to...have feelings for Sydney,” Nana said in a quiet tone. “Are you?”
“No!” Rebecca protested immediately. “No, Nana! Ew! I mean.. well.. ”
“Oh, Rebecca,” Nana said.
Rebecca could almost see her shaking her head.
“It’s not like that!” Rebecca protested again. “It’s just. .weird, that’s all.”
“Listen to me very carefully, Rebecca Charlotte,” Nana said in a stern voice. “Syd is your mentor. Your instructor and your protector. He’s there only to do those things, and that is all. Whatever else might be going on, however you think you might feel around him—it’s not real, understand?”
“I understand,” Rebecca said.
“Rebecca, I mean it,” Nana said. There was a strange urgency in her voice. “Do not look him in the eye. Ever. And I know that’s what you’ve been doing, or you wouldn’t be talking this way. Feeling something you shouldn’t be. I know he’s been coming to you for—”
Nana cut herself off, as though she had started to say something and realized she shouldn’t.
Rebecca’s stomach clenched with a horrible feeling.
“Coming to me for what, Nana?” Rebecca asked. “What did you and Syd talk about, before you left?”
Nana didn’t reply right away.
“Nana?”
“You’re very powerful, Rebecca,” Nana said, so soft that Rebecca had to strain to hear. “Syd is only doing what he has to.”
“What he has to, or what you asked him to?” Rebecca forced herself to ask.Nana didn’t reply, and Rebecca knew that Syd taking her blood had been her grandmother’s idea.
“Why?”
“To keep your power somewhat in check long enough so that you can’t be found before your birthday,” her grandmother replied. “He’s doing what he can to hide you. He’s the only one who can, but even with both him and Ryan there—”
“Well he’s not doing a very good job, according to Denis!” Rebecca interrupted, hurt. “No matter how much he takes from me! Damn it, Nana!
Why didn’t anyone tell me?”
“Don’t swear, Rebecca! We’re just trying to protect you,” Nana offered.
“We thought that if you knew, you wouldn’t consent to it. You wouldn’t want to be a burden, or trouble anyone. It was better this way.” It was true. Nana was right. Had she known that Syd was taking her blood only to keep her power in check, she’d have resisted.
“But...but he needed me...”
Rebecca hadn’t realized she’d spoken aloud until her nana replied.
“I’m sure he did. Ryan is taking a great deal out of him, and he’s been ensuring the talisman he gave me is still in working order, not to mention he has a clan to see to and other protections he’s arranged. He’s needed replenishment, Rebecca. He just didn’t have to take it from you. It was thought that perhaps he should add to Ryan’s drain on your power, to keep you safe.”
“I understand,” Rebecca said, thought it still hurt to think about.
She felt used. And lied to. Deceived.
At least Marla Thompson did mean things to her face and not behind her back. This felt a lot worse than anything Marla had ever done.
“I’ll be home on Monday, little dove, and we’ll talk more then, all right?”
“All right, Nana,” Rebecca made herself say, and hope she sounded normal when she really just wanted to burst into tears. “Have a good bridge game. See you Monday.”
“I love you, Rebecca.”
“Love you too, Nana.”
Rebecca hung up the phone, feeling like someone had punched her in the stomach.
“Ain’t nothin’ to eat in this house,” Billy grumbled as he pulled his head out of the fridge. “Going out to get some grub. Want anything?” Rebecca shook her head.
She didn’t think she could eat now. Or ever again.
w x
Rebecca waited until the sun started to set to go up and see Ryan and change the sheets on his bed. She told herself that it was out of politeness—sunset was when he should be awake and she wouldn’t have to wake him to remake the bed—but really it was because she didn’t want to chance seeing Syd.
She didn’t think she was ready to see him, knowing what she knew now.
Normally the day seemed to drag by as she waited for the sunset. Today it seemed to come all too quick.
That, and she really didn’t want to feed Ryan, and see horrible things.
The images had been getting worse—stronger—and she didn’t want to feel any worse than she did now.
She understood now, Syd’s absences. She knew he was a Master and had a clan to see to, but she’d never suspected he was going to...to collude with her grandmother. Sure, Nana’s talisman needed to be checked on and refilled if needed, but Syd had made it sound like what he’d given her was all Nana needed.
Syd had told her not to worry about Nana’s safety. Not to worry about anything, because stress and anxiety just made her a bigger target.
Rebecca snorted. More like “undid all his hard work” or something.
And what was all that about not leaving her unprotected? He and Billy were gone practically all the time!
Rebecca shook her head and sighed. There was no getting around it.
She had to go up and see Ryan. She could feel h
is hunger tugging at her. She went to the downstairs linen closet to pull out a clean set of sheets.
“He’s fine,” she heard Syd say.
Rebecca turned to see him standing behind her. Everything she’d come up with during the day to say to Syd left her mind. Her stomach did a funny little flip at the sight of his blond hair, but she squelched it and told herself to stop being stupid.
“Oh, hi,” Rebecca replied as she turned back to the linen closet.
“‘Oh, hi,’” Syd repeated. “What kind of greeting is that? Is something wrong?”
Rebecca shook her head. She didn’t trust herself to speak at the moment. She didn’t know whether she was more angry or hurt. She selected a set of clean sheets and turned back to face him, clutching the bedding to her chest.
“Oh, come now,” Syd replied. “I’ve done you the courtesy of not hearing your thoughts for myself. Do me the courtesy of sharing them with me.” He reached to touch her face and ran his thumb along her cheek in a gentle caress, like a boyfriend—or a lover—might.
Rebecca flinched back.
Syd raised a brow at her. “What is it?”
“Nothing that would matter to you,” Rebecca replied. She made to push past him. She wasn’t ready to talk about it just yet.
His strong hand on her upper arm stopped her. “Do not force me to look for myself,” he warned. “I asked you a question, and I expect an answer.”
“Like it matters!” Rebecca flared as she jerked her arm away from him.
“It does matter!” Syd retorted. “Tell me what’s upset you.”
“Why? Worried that my little upset will interfere with the plan that you and Nana made to keep me safe?” Rebecca demanded, hating herself for the tears forming in her eyes. She’d had all day to think about this conversation, and it wasn’t going at all like it had in her head. “You know, the one where you take my blood to keep my power under control until my birthday so no more demons would find and attack me?”
“We couldn’t have another attack like the one that happened to you at school,” Syd replied. “We had to do something.”
“You told me that by letting you feed from me that I...I was helping you!” Rebecca said, wiping her eyes before her tears could fall. She did not want to cry in front of Syd. “By letting you...consenting to...I thought I was replenishing the power that Ryan was taking from you—that you’d used to help Nana. Not that you were just doing it to keep me off some demonic radar!”“We didn’t want to add to your fear,” Sydney replied. “It was better to let you believe you were helping me than that we needed a way to keep your power hidden. It was easier. You believed you were helping, consented of your own free will, and most importantly, were not afraid. If it had been a chore or you believed you had to do so to preserve your safety, you would have been tense and anxious—something we’re trying to avoid. It was better all around if you thought it was your idea and did it of your own free will, and you were helping me. Just not as you expected.”