by A. C. James
“Katarina is dead. That’s Holly. Do try to remember,” Toren said.
The confusion in his eyes only deepened, and he kept looking from him to me and back again. He looked like me might bolt at any minute; maybe Toren sensed that too, because he moved toward the stairs that led up to the loft as if to keep Arie from going down them. Arie took a step toward them anyway.
“I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Toren said. “You’re not going anywhere. Besides, we have to get back to the club soon.”
“The club?” Arie asked.
Oh, this wasn’t good. It appeared that it wasn’t just that he couldn’t remember me, but his entire short-term memory had been affected by whatever Daeveena had done to him.
“What’s the last thing you remember?” I asked.
Shit.
Maybe it would’ve been better to let Toren do all the talking because, Arie just looked at me as if I had grown two heads.
“South Side of Chicago, HFC, Tessa, ring any bells?” Toren asked.
Arie shook his head. “I know who Tessa is, but I don’t remember any club.”
“Well at least that’s a start,” Toren muttered and looked toward the red digital display of the clock that sat on the bedside table next to me. “Okay, here’s the short story. This demon named Daeveena did something to your memory. We need to do a locator spell to track her down. So we need to head over to the club to see if her sister Luna has something that we can use to do the spell. Make sense?”
“No,” Arie said.
“Well that’s great because that makes two of us,” Toren said.
Arie crossed his arms. “And you expect me to just trust you? You’re telling me that isn’t Katarina. Do you really expect me to believe that?”
I gulped. “Look at me.”
Arie turned in my direction, and for a moment I thought he might argue with me, but he didn’t say anything. He continued to stand there, his gray eyes cold as ice. It fucking killed me.
“Look at my eyes. See. They’re not the same color as hers.”
His eyes lost some of the chill as he seemed to be studying me. He stepped toward the foot of the bed like he needed to get a closer look, or maybe he still didn’t believe it.
“No. No, they’re not,” Arie finally said.
“Great, now that’s all cleared up we should really get going,” Toren said. He gestured toward the stairs and Arie took two steps toward them, but then Toren grabbed his arm. “And you can’t be alone with her anymore.”
Arie didn’t even bother to look at me.
“You don’t have any worries there,” Arie said and started down the stairs.
Toren hung back for a minute. I could feel tears stinging my eyes, but I wouldn’t let him see me cry or see the ring. I cupped one hand in the other to cover up the engagement ring that Arie had given me only hours before. We’d both known the risk, but we’d taken it anyway. Still, I don’t think either one of us expected to wake up to find that all our hopes and dreams were gone. Just like that.
“Are you okay?” Toren asked.
I scoffed. “Not so much.”
“Yeah.” And then without warning Toren sat on the edge of the bed and hugged me. It was the awkward kind of hug that a man who can’t cope with waterworks gives a woman when he thinks she’s going to start bawling. But regardless of how complicated Toren was or how I felt about him, he had come when I’d called for him, and right now I needed a hug. I closed my eyes as I inhaled the scent of his leather jacket. I’m not sure how long we sat there on the bed, but I realized that the hug no longer felt weird. Oddly, it felt a little right. That made it feel awkward all over again, at least for me. And suddenly I became aware that the only thing covering me was the rumpled sheet that I’d wrapped around my body.
I coughed. “You can let go of me now.”
His body tensed.
“It’s okay. I’m not going to cry.”
“Oh. Right.” Toren leaned away from me. I couldn’t explain why, but I missed his lean arms folding me into his body like some precious and fragile thing he wanted to protect. I’d always been the kind of gal who could stand up for myself, but at the moment I had to admit that I needed protection, needed him, regardless of how crazy-mixed up it made me feel. “You should hurry up and get dressed.”
He stood and turned toward the stairs, but lingered there with his hand on the rail, staring back at me.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” he asked. “Do you need any help?”
I wanted to ask, Help with what? Getting dressed?
But instead I said, “Yeah, I’ll be down in just a sec.”
He continued to stand there with a funny look on his face, like maybe he didn’t realize how much he’d like holding me, or perhaps he was imagining what I looked like underneath that sheet. Either way those weren’t the kind of thoughts I wanted to engender.
“I can’t very well get dressed with you standing there staring at me.”
Toren shook his head. “Right. Sorry. I just wanted to make sure you’re all right.”
“Yes, well, if I get lost on my way to the bathroom I’ll be sure to yell for you.”
I didn’t want him to think that I didn’t appreciate him coming to the rescue, but I figured it would be better to be at least a little bitchy so he didn’t get the wrong idea. Considering that Toren flirted with anything that moved, it was a distinct possibility, and I didn’t want him to read the situation wrong. On the other hand…hadn’t I been the one to nuzzle into his leather jacket? If I didn’t like it, then why did I hug him back? Let it go. It had to have been because of the moment, nothing more.
Toren laughed. “Well, I see you’ve regained your capacity for witty comebacks. I think you’ll be just fine. Just don’t fall in.”
And with that Toren turned and walked down the stairs. I flopped on the bed and lay there staring at the ceiling. Just breathe. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9…
“Holly, hurry up.”
“Coming!”
I tossed the sheet aside and swung my legs over the edge of the bed before I made my way to the pristine white bathroom to wash my face and quickly get dressed. The cool water felt refreshing, but the sparkle on my left ring finger drew my attention. As I looked in the mirror, I forced myself to draw my shoulders back and harden my heart. I slid the ring off my finger and placed it in the vanity drawer next to my hairbrush. I didn’t want to have to explain anything to Toren and Tessa—or worse, to upset Arie, who wouldn’t even remember asking.
Chapter 8
We took my BMW on the way over to the club again because there was no way we’d all be able to pile into Arie’s Venom. Toren drove, while I sat in the passenger seat trying very hard not to cry. Springtime in Chicago always meant brisk weather that usually roared in like a lion, but I would have had to fight goose bumps anyway after the way Arie had treated me like a stranger. Somehow that had broken me more than waking to his hands clenched around my neck. I pulled ChapStick out of my cargo pants and opened the lighted mirror on the visor, but really I was scoping out Arie in the backseat. He scowled out the window into the night.
I smeared my lips with the balm and pursed them together.
“Are we almost there?” Arie asked.
It still felt surreal that he couldn’t remember me or the club. “Yeah, we’ll be there in ten minutes.”
Maybe it was something in my voice that gave me away, but Toren glanced at me, then back at the road. Even though his attention returned to driving, he slid one hand across to squeeze mine. It didn’t feel reassuring—I doubted anything could make me feel better about the current situation—but I welcomed the physical touch, the contact of another being who wanted to comfort me. Arie was in trouble, and at the moment we would have to work together to find Daeveena even if I had no idea what we’d do once we did.
-I’m sorry, Holly.-
Toren’s telepathic prod jarred me from my thoughts. I glanced over my shoulder at Arie, who’d returned to starin
g out the window. My fingers were still linked with Toren’s.
-Sorry? What are you sorry for?-
-That I couldn’t get back to the loft sooner. I should have never left you alone with him in the first place.-
I gulped. And then I squeezed his hand. –You didn’t know what he would do.-
Toren let out a sigh. –But I should have known. I knew he wasn’t right back at the diner, but I left you alone with him anyway.-
-It’s not your fault.-
He didn’t respond, so I squeezed his fingers one more time and then released his hand before things became even more awkward between us. We drove the rest of the way in silence, all of us lost in our individual thoughts. The closer we got to the club, the more anxious Arie became. I could tell by the way he kept shifting in his seat like a caged animal that he wanted out of the car. Man, what a mess.
We approached the non-descript building that hid HFC for what it really was—a playground for the supernatural, right in plain sight. There were no windows, and the main entrance was through an underground parking garage which was by no coincidence the safest place to park your car in the whole city. Arie had laughed when I chided him for leaving the keys in the ignition of his Venom the first time he’d brought me here. My stomach twisted in knots as I thought back to that night. I hadn’t known if I could accept his world, and now what I wouldn’t give to have everything back the way it used to be.
Toren pulled into the parkade, whizzing around the sharp turns. Usually I would have said something, but all my focus was on finding Luna’s crazy-ass sister. I’d never considered myself the violent type, but I couldn’t be held accountable for what I might do to Daeveena if we ever caught up with her. I’d like to wring her neck—just not until she’d straightened out the mess she’d caused.
“We’re here,” I said as I turned toward Arie.
He nodded, but he seemed to be taking in his surroundings as if they were foreign to him.
The garage was packed. Then again, this was prime time for the club and I fully expected it to be filled wall to wall with humans, both downstairs at the Goth club and upstairs at the BDSM sex club where the supernatural went to feed on Puncture. It occurred to me that Arie wouldn’t know anything about any of it. Toren finally found an empty space. As soon as he shut off the ignition, I was out of the car almost as fast as Arie.
Toren looked at me. “Let’s do this.”
“Yes, let’s.”
“Let’s go find us a faerie.”
“Be nice to Luna. She’s been through a lot. She’s fragile.”
“Do I know her? Luna?” Arie asked.
I didn’t know why, but I wanted to scream at him. It wasn’t his fault, I knew that, and yet in the back of my mind I couldn’t help thinking, Yeah, you bloody well fucked her. I’d say you know her pretty damn good. But I didn’t say it, because I knew it wouldn’t matter and it was wrong to be that way when he couldn’t help it. Instead I walked ahead of him and Toren, straight toward the beautiful stained art glass that led into the lobby.
“I think that’s a yes,” Toren said.
I could practically hear him smirk. It was easier if I held onto anger, so I pressed my fingernails into my palms as an irritant.
“Come on you two. We don’t have time for this.”
Toren bent time and was at my side.
“All you had to do was say ‘please,’ darlin’,” he said with a grin.
“Not now,” I said, picking up my pace as I walked briskly and pulled open the door to the lobby. “I don’t have time for your games.”
Toren barely caught the door as he followed me across the red velvet carpet. Arie was right on his heels.
“I never play games or say anything I don’t mean,” Toren said with such quiet venom that I almost didn’t hear him.
There was a burly bouncer sitting in Victoria’s usual seat. He was screening the Goth clubbers, who were eagerly waiting in a long line that wound down the carpet to get into the club. An even more imposing-looking bouncer, a vampire with thick arms, stood at his right shoulder guarding the door. I didn’t care. I didn’t even stop.
* * *
“Hey,” the bouncer sitting at the ornate table shouted to the other one. “Stop her!”
It didn’t matter, because within moments I was down the short flight of black marble stairs and moving through the throng of clubbers undulating across the LED-lit expanse that formed the dance floor. The bone-pounding music matched my heartbeat as I scanned the bar across the starry abyss for Luna’s silvery hair before heading toward the elevators, keycard in hand. She wasn’t down here, so she must be working the bar upstairs.
-Holly! Wait, Holly-
I didn’t answer Toren’s telepathic shout, not when we were this close to finding something that could help us track down the demon who’d cursed Arie. Not when they were wasting time dealing with Tessa’s goons. When I reached the elevator I swiped my keycard, and stepped into its depths once the door slid open. The number two lit up when I pressed the button.
Come on, come on.
Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion. The elevator ascended at a slow, mechanical pace as my thoughts ran wild. I couldn’t help thinking of the night Daeveena had stood in this very club. If I’d known she’d cursed him, I would have never let her leave, but the damage was done. Now we just had to undo it. It wasn’t impatience, but my anger at Daeveena propelled me into action. I couldn’t very well hit her like I wanted to whenever I thought about that night.
When the elevators stopped and the doors slid open, I pushed through the bustling club—past bodies sprawled in impossible sexual positions, under a woman suspended from the ceiling—and scanned this bar for Luna too. At first I didn’t see her, but then the distinctive shimmer of her glossy silver hair gave her away. She stood with a drink tray at one of the pub tables, talking to a customer.
I bent time to get to her, moving quickly through the bar. “Luna!”
“Holly, what is it?” she asked. “Excuse me,” she said to the customer and stepped away from him, taking my arm as she did.
“It’s Arie. Daeveena did something to him. She cursed him or something.” I looked away. “He can’t remember me…”
Luna looked scared. She pulled me to one of the tables by the balcony, overlooking the Goth clubbers dancing below.
“There’s something I have to tell you,” she said, her face earnest. “That’s what she does. It’s her power as a demon. My father used it to his advantage when he ran the Chicago Crew.”
I bit my lower lip. “What do you mean? I heard her mutter something as she was leaving the club the night that Victoria became human and left us. I thought she cursed him or something.”
“It’s not a curse. I can promise you that.”
“Then what is it?”
“She can steal memories and use them as illusions, as nightmares. She can use Arie’s own memories against him, too.”
It made sense now. Arie had clearly been having a nightmare when I woke to him choking me. My stomach churned.
“What should I do?” I whispered. My question really wasn’t directed at Luna. It was more of a fear voiced aloud, of not knowing what to do to help the man I loved.
But Luna answered anyway. “You have to go to her and convince her to give Arie his memories back. It’s the only way.”
“What if she doesn’t?” My voice cracked.
“Then I’ll kill her,” Toren said from behind me.
Arie was right behind him, the two of them had caught up with me. Toren glared at me, clearly ticked off that I had rushed ahead of them to find Luna. I didn’t care.
“I’ll help,” Arie said.
Luna looked a little sad when she regarded Arie, but neither of us argued with them. Toren’s fierce protectiveness toward his brother and their mutual anger was to be expected. Still, I wished they wouldn’t have said so when we needed Luna to give us something that belonged to her sister in order for Rue t
o do the spell. Before they said anything else that might make her not want to help us, I figured we ought to see about getting what we came here for in the first place.
“Luna,” I said with a pause. “Will you help us?”
“Of course, anything.”
“My godmother can do a locator spell to find Daeveena, but we need something that belongs to her for it to work. That’s why we came to find you.”
“Because you thought I might have something of hers,” Luna said.
“You’re her sister. Please tell me that there’s something, anything, some keepsake from when you two were growing up.”
Luna shook her head. “There’s not. I’m sorry.”
“I told you this was going to be a waste of time,” Toren said. “Let’s go.”
“Wait!” Luna grabbed my arm again. “There is one thing, but I don’t know whether it will work or not. I have a locket that used to be hers, but she gave it to me the first time she ever took off. She put a picture in it so that I’d always remember her.”
“I don’t know whether it’ll work either, but we have to try. Can we borrow it?” I asked.
“Yes, anything to help Arie. It’s in my jewelry box in Arie’s old apartment upstairs. I can go get it.”
“I’ll come with you,” I said.
Luna turned toward the elevator with me and Toren on her heels.
“I’ll just stay here,” Arie said.
We all turned in his direction.
He shrugged. “Hungry.”
Arie touched his tongue to a fang, which seemed to have instinctively elongated when a brunette donor had stopped a few feet away. She appeared to be chatting with a vampire over by the bar.
“Starving, in fact,” Arie said as he glanced at her again.
I swallowed. Hard. I hadn’t seen Arie take a Crimson Dusk in a long time, and now that Victor Monti was dead and the poisoned Puncture was no longer an issue there was no need for him to do anything other than walk over to the bar and order a pint. Jealousy coursed through me, because even though it wasn’t cheating—he needed to feed—it felt intimate, and it made me insecure. Especially when he didn’t even remember me, let alone that we were engaged. I didn’t say anything for fear that I might start crying a bloody river. I turned back toward Luna and started for the elevator.