EG03 - Home Is Where The Heart Is

by Joan Jonker

  The man rubbed the back of his hand across his nose. The woman’s barmy, he thought, nutty as a fruit cake. But she was also very big, with muscles on her like Popeye, and he had no intention of crossing her. ‘Yeah, OK.’

  ‘Oh, you are kind.’ Eileen pulled him towards the woman who was listening with her mouth open in amazement. ‘This very nice gentleman is going to help you. He’ll make sure yer get what you’ve come for. And he’s goin’ to tell his lady friend in the blue coat, aren’t you, love?’

  The glint in Eileen’s eyes warned the man not to argue. ‘Yeah, I’ll give Hilda the wire.’

  ‘Oh, good!’ Eileen beamed. ‘We’re only goin’ outside for a bit, so we’ll see yez later.’

  ‘What was all that about?’ Mary followed in Eileen’s wake as she pushed her way through the crowd. ‘I thought we were going home?’

  ‘So we are, kid! I’ll explain when we’re outside.’

  But the smile left Eileen’s face when she went to pay for the table and bedroom suite. The man took her money without looking up. ‘D’yer want it delivered?’

  ‘Of course I want it delivered! D’yer think I’m goin’ to carry the blinkin’ things on me back!’

  ‘Ten bob delivery charge.’ The man held his hand out. ‘We deliver in your area on a Thursday.’

  ‘What! Flippin’ daylight robbery!’ Eileen could see there was no use arguing, so she turned to Mary. ‘Well, money bags, I ’ope yer’ve got ten bob to lend me.’

  ‘I’ll pay for me table when we get home,’ Maggie said quietly. ‘I’ve got a few pounds put by.’

  ‘Yer burial money is it, Mam?’ Eileen patted Maggie’s arm. ‘Don’t act the goat, missus. Yer know I’m only kiddin’.’

  Eileen took one of Maggie’s arms, Mary the other, and three happy and well-satisfied women marched out of the shop. And they laughed all the way home on the bus when Eileen told them about the bedding bale. Between guffaws that had all the passengers on the bus looking at them, Eileen said, ‘The funniest thing of all is, I told that bloke I was only goin’ outside for a breath of fresh air an’ I’d be back. He’ll probably still be there when the shop closes.’

  ‘It looks a treat, Ma.’ Bill’s gaze swept Maggie’s room. The sideboard, a present from Rene and Alan, had been delivered that day, along with the furniture from Hartley’s. ‘And when it’s decorated, you won’t know yourself.’

  Young Billy was peering over his dad’s shoulder. ‘Yeah, it looks great, Nan. Proper posh.’

  ‘When it’s all finished, I’ll invite you in for tea,’ Maggie said with pride. ‘In fact, we’ll have a party.’

  ‘An’ ’ave the neighbours talkin’.’ Eileen pushed between her husband and son, sending them flying. ‘There’ll be no rowdy parties in this ’ouse, missus. It’ll be afternoon tea by invitation only.’

  Maggie moved the aspidistra plant an inch, then stood back to admire the new table. ‘Sets the room off, doesn’t it?’

  ‘Yes,’ Bill agreed, ‘just the finishing touch it needed. Apart from a few odds and sods, the whole house is furnished now.’

  ‘Except for the decoratin’,’ Eileen reminded him. ‘This wallpaper is so dark it gives me the willies.’ She linked her arm through Bill’s and fluttered her eyelashes at him. ‘When are yer goin’ to make a start?’

  ‘We’ve arranged to start scraping at the week-end. If we get all the dirty work done first, it’ll be half the battle.’ Bill smacked his forehead with an open hand. ‘Oh, I forgot to tell you, Arthur didn’t turn in to work today. He rang to say his wife was ill.’

  ‘What’s wrong with ’er?’

  ‘I don’t know. It was his foreman who told Harry.’ The three of them worked on different sections in the English Electric, but they met up at lunch time in the canteen. Harry had a good job as a manager, Bill was a joiner and Arthur an electrician.

  ‘I ’ope it’s nothin’ serious,’ Eileen said. ‘Arthur told me on Saturday that she looked ill, but she wouldn’t go to the doctor’s.’

  ‘He’ll probably be back at work tomorrow. If not, he’s bound to let us know what’s going on.’

  Eileen pinched at the fat on her elbows. ‘I feel sorry for ’im. He’s got no friends up there, so he’s no one to mind the boys. If ’e didn’t live so far away, I’d call an’ see if there was anything I could do. But it’s bloody miles away.’

  ‘Don’t even think about it, chick!’ Bill wagged a finger under Eileen’s nose. ‘You’re in no condition to be helping anybody.’

  ‘Bill, I only meant that if they lived nearer, I could ’elp with the boys. See them off to school, like, and let them come ’ere until Arthur got ’ome from work. It’s not as if they’re babies and need washing an’ dressin’, for heaven’s sake. David’s eleven, and Gordon’s nine.’

  ‘Me dad’s right, Mam,’ Billy said. ‘You’ve got to look after yerself.’

  ‘Oh, don’t you start!’ Eileen jerked her head in disgust, but secretly she was pleased. He was a good boy, was Billy, very caring for a boy his age. ‘Anyway, what are we gettin’ so het up about? Sylvia’s probably got a cold an’ will be up an’ about in a day or two.’

  ‘In the meantime, you stay out of it, right?’ Bill’s face was stern. ‘No taking it upon yourself to go up there, jumping on and off buses.’ Eileen took one look at Bill’s set face and nodded.

  ‘Our Billy’s ’ad ’is dinner.’ Eileen placed the plate in front of Bill. ‘I think ’e must ’ave a date, ’cos he threw ’is dinner down and dashed upstairs to get ready.’

  Bill eyed the plate heaped with mashed potatoes, cabbage and bacon ribs. ‘That looks good, chick! Now a bit of beetroot, or some pickled cabbage would go down a treat with that lot.’

  ‘Who was yer servant before I came along, Bill Gillmoss? Anyone would think yer were born with a silver spoon in yer mouth, instead of a flippin’ dummy.’ Eileen came back with a glass bowl full of deep red beetroot. ‘As it so ’appens, me mam did this today.’ She watched Bill dip his fork in the bowl, a look of anticipation on his face. ‘D’yer remember when I was expectin’ our Billy, an’ I ’ad a cravin’ for a coconut? And with Edna it was crab? Well, this time it’s beetroot an’ that’s why me mam made that. So don’t yer scoff the lot.’

  Bill looked up, a smile on his face. ‘What a time I had getting that crab. I think I tried every fish shop from here to town before I finally got one.’

  Eileen asked the question that had been on her lips since Bill entered the house. ‘Did Arthur turn in?’

  Bill shook his head. ‘Didn’t ring up, either.’

  ‘Oh, dear.’ Eileen rested her elbows on the table. ‘I wonder what’s up?’

  Bill had a piece of bacon rib in his hands and was chewing on the meat. He didn’t answer till the bone was clean and he placed it at the side of his plate. ‘Harry said if there’s no word tomorrow, he’ll run me up there tomorrow night.’

  ‘I’ve got a feelin’ in me bones that there’s somethin’ drastically wrong,’ Eileen said. ‘I don’t ’alf feel sorry for Arthur. He’s such a nice feller, he deserves a better life than he’s got. An’ the kids, too, poor buggers.’

  Bill put his knife and fork down and reached across to pat her arm. ‘We don’t know how lucky we are, do we, chick? Always enough coal on the fire, food in the larder, good kids and a happy marriage. Who could ask for more in life?’

  Eileen grinned. ‘Yeah. We could conquer the world, you an’ me, Bill Gillmoss.’

  Eileen suddenly sat back in the chair, her two hands covering the lump in her tummy. ‘This little feller is certainly lettin’ me know he’s ’ere. Been at it all day, he ’as.’

  ‘Why do you keep calling it a “he”? There’s a fifty-fifty chance on it being a girl.’

  ‘Uh, uh,’ Eileen smiled knowingly. ‘It’s a boy all right. A footballer, too! Been kickin’ like mad all day.’

  ‘I’ll put his name down to play for Liverpool the day he’s born then.’ Bill smiled back. ‘They could do w
ith a good half-back.’

  Maggie was sitting comfortably in her new chair listening to the wireless. She hadn’t bothered to close the curtains because the street lamp outside the house gave her all the light she needed in the room. It was from this light she saw Arthur pass the window. ‘Arthur’s here,’ she called, as she made her way down the hall. ‘I’ll open the door.’

  Arthur’s face was white and drawn as he stood in the middle of the room, his hands nervously running round the rim of his trilby hat. ‘I’ve come from the hospital, that’s why it’s a bit late.’

  ‘Is Sylvia in hospital, then?’ Eileen took Arthur’s hat and put it on the sideboard. ‘Take yer coat off and sit down.’

  ‘They took her in the Southern this morning.’ Arthur sat down heavily, his breath coming in quick gasps. ‘Visiting is half seven to eight, and I got the bus right down here.’

  ‘Who’s lookin’ after the boys?’

  ‘One of the neighbours.’ Arthur saw the look of surprise on Eileen’s face and nodded. ‘I find it hard to believe meself. For two years all they’ve ever done is pass the time of day. But when the ambulance arrived this morning, two of them knocked on the door and asked if they could do anything to help. I was glad of it too, I can tell you.’

  ‘And Sylvia,’ Bill asked, ‘what’s wrong with her?’

  ‘They don’t know yet.’ Arthur said, his gaze resting on Edna who was all ears. He shrugged his shoulders. ‘They’ll know more in a day or two.’

  ‘Have yer ’ad anythin’ to eat?’ Eileen asked briskly.

  ‘All I’ve done all day is drink cups of tea. I don’t feel hungry, I’ve gone past it.’

  ‘Rubbish! Yer’ve got to eat or yer’ll be ill yerself.’ Eileen dug her elbow in Bill’s ribs. ‘Give Edna two bob an’ she can go for some fish an’ chips.’

  ‘Ah, ray, Mam!’ Edna complained, frightened of missing something.

  ‘Now then, young lady, you just do as you’re told.’ Bill passed the coin over. ‘The shop’s only at the top of the road.’

  Maggie had been standing inside the door, now she bustled towards the kitchen. ‘I’ll put the kettle on and butter some bread.’

  Eileen waited for the slam of the front door, then leaned forward. ‘Do they know what’s wrong with Sylvia?’

  Arthur rubbed a hand across his forehead. ‘I asked the Sister tonight but she wouldn’t commit herself. Said they’d be keeping an eye on her for a few days before doing any tests. But when the doctor said he was sending her to hospital, I asked him what he thought was wrong with her. He didn’t want to say anything at first, but I kept on at him that much he finally said he thought it was TB.’

  ‘Oh, dear God, no!’ Eileen’s face drained of colour. ‘People die of TB, don’t they?’ Too late Eileen realised what she’d said and clamped a hand over her mouth. ‘I’m sorry, Arthur, I shouldn’t ’ave said that. I don’t know what I’m talkin’ about, anyway, so take no notice.’

  ‘You’ve only said what I’m thinking,’ Arthur said. ‘And the best of it is, the doctor blamed me.’ There was bitterness in his voice. ‘Threw the book at me for not making Sylvia get some attention before now.’

  ‘But didn’t yer tell ’im?’ Eileen asked angrily.

  ‘I did in the end. Told him the lot.’ Arthur lifted his hand and snapped his fingers. ‘And he changed, just like that. Couldn’t have been nicer or more understanding. Said it explained Sylvia’s terrible colour. Too much drinking over too long a period had probably damaged her liver.’

  ‘Poor woman,’ Bill said softly. ‘Poor silly woman.’

  ‘Poor woman?’ Arthur’s nostrils were white with anger. ‘Bill, I could kill her with me bare hands! If she had no thought for herself, at least she should have had some thought for her two sons. They’re at home now, Bill, crying their eyes out because their mother’s sick. She wasn’t a good wife, and certainly not a good mother, but she’s the only one they’ve got! That’s the only reason I’ve stayed with her.’

  ‘Doctors don’t know everythin’, yer know, Arthur.’ Tears were stinging the backs of Eileen’s eyes. She didn’t like Sylvia, but she certainly wouldn’t wish this on her. ‘She’s in the right place in the hospital, they’ll sort ’er out.’

  ‘I think the doctor was right,’ Arthur said. ‘If you’d seen the change in her over the last six months, you’d know what I’m talking about. She lost so much weight she was only skin and bone. And her cough got so bad over the last few weeks she could hardly breathe.’ Arthur was silent for a moment, then said, ‘If only she’d done as I asked all those months ago, it mightn’t have gone this far. But no, she had to go her own way. Out every night dressed like a floosie, coming home all hours the worse for drink. Bleary-eyed every morning, sending the boys off to school any old way. And never without a cigarette dangling out of the corner of her mouth. But for all that, she’s the mother of my two sons and they love her.’

  ‘What will you do now, Arthur?’ Bill was so affected he had to struggle to get the words out. ‘Will you have to stay off work?’

  ‘Mrs Wright next door has offered to see to the boys for me, at least until we know what’s happening. They’re old enough to see to their own breakfast and get themselves off to school, so it’s only for a few hours at night, until I get home.’ There was a trace of sadness in Arthur’s voice. ‘From what I gathered this morning, listening to Mrs Wright and Mrs Summers, they’ve felt sorry for me since I came back from the army. Oh, they didn’t say it in so many words, but it was Sylvia’s way of life they objected to and that’s why they kept their distance.’

  They probably had plenty of reasons for not liking Sylvia, Eileen thought. She was so hard-faced and brazen, she wouldn’t worry what the neighbours thought of her. Knowing Arthur was a prisoner of war, and seeing her out with every Tom, Dick and Harry, it was only natural that decent people would distance themselves from her.

  Edna arrived back with the fish and chips and put a stop to any intimate conversation. It was when Arthur was leaving, Eileen asked him to let her know if it would be all right for her and Mary to go in and visit his wife. He threw her a look of gratitude and promised to see Bill in work and let him know how the land lay.

  Chapter Eight

  ‘Are you going to the shops?’ Mary asked. ‘I’ll walk up with you if you like, give you a hand.’

  ‘No, I got all me shoppin’ in yesterday.’ Eileen stood in the middle of Martha’s room, dressed in her swagger coat that was fast becoming too small. ‘I’m goin’ up to Bray Street to see all me friends. I didn’t get a chance when we moved and they’ll think I’m terrible doin’ a flit without saying goodbye after being neighbours for all those years.’

  ‘D’you want me to come with you?’ Mary asked. ‘You really shouldn’t be going that far on your own.’

  ‘Our Edna’s comin’ with me. She’ll be ’ere soon. I sent her upstairs to get a proper wash. She said she’d ’ad one, but it must ’ave been a cat’s lick an’ a promise ’cos she ’ad a flippin’ big tidemark.’

  ‘Sit down while you’re waiting,’ Martha said, pointing to the couch. ‘Take the weight off your feet.’

  ‘Mrs B, if I sat down there, yer’d need a crane to get me up. I’ll just park meself on yer bed, if yer don’t mind.’ Eileen lowered herself slowly. ‘It’s like a mad house down there, I was glad to get out. Bill’s started on the hall with our Billy ’elping ’im, Harry’s doin’ the livin’ room an’ our Rene’s in the front parlour. Honest, I’ll be glad when it’s all finished.’

  ‘It won’t take long. I’ve trimmed half the rolls of paper and I’ll do the rest when I’ve got the dinner prepared.’ Mary sat down beside Eileen and put an arm across her shoulder. ‘Come on, cheer up! Just think how nice it’ll be when it’s all finished.’

  ‘It’s not only that that’s makin’ me feel miserable,’ Eileen admitted, heaving a huge sigh. ‘I can’t get Arthur an’ Sylvia off me mind.’

  ‘It’s not good news, is it, lass?�
�� Martha said. ‘It must be serious if they’ve transferred her to Fazakerley Hospital.’

  ‘I keep thinkin’ about the boys, poor beggars. They’re too young to know what TB is. They know their mam’s sick, but that’s about all.’

  ‘Look, Eileen, in your condition you shouldn’t be getting yourself all upset.’ Mary’s pretty face clouded with concern for her friend. ‘All the worrying in the world won’t change things, so try and put it out of your mind.’

  ‘I can’t ’elp it, kid, yer know what I’m like. Arthur’s ’ad such a lousy time, an’ now this on top of everythin’ else.’

  There was a tap on the window and Eileen held her hands out to Mary to help her up. ‘That’ll be our Edna. I’d better go an’ see if the tide’s gone out.’

  As soon as they turned into Bray Street, Edna skipped ahead. ‘I’m goin’ to see Janet.’

  ‘Hey, buggerlugs,’ Eileen shouted after her. ‘Don’t you go doin’ a disappearin’ act! I’ll meet yer in the corner shop about three.’ Eileen walked slowly up the street and with each step her heart became heavier. Further up she could see some of her old neighbours standing at their doors chatting, while the laughter of children at play filled the air. God, what a difference, Eileen thought. We may be living in a posh house in a swanky neighbourhood, but give me this any time.

  Edna had spread the news and people appeared as if by magic. In no time Eileen found herself surrounded, everyone smiling and asking how she was and how she liked the new house. Putting a brave face on, Eileen gave a glowing report on her new home, stopping only briefly to cross her fingers and ask God to forgive her once again for telling lies. They’re not really lies, she reminded Him. It is a nice house, it’s just that I wish it wasn’t me living in it.

  Cissie Maddox pushed her way through the crowd that had gathered. ‘Well, at last yer’ve remembered yer old friends. We were beginnin’ to think we weren’t good enough for yer now.’

  ‘As if I could forget you, Cissie Maddox.’ Eileen eyed Cissie up and down before casting her eyes down to her own swollen body. ‘I’m bigger than yer now, Cissie, so watch yerself.’