by Hannah Gray
“Mmhmm. Sure she does.” I laugh.
Maybe we aren’t perfect in the eyes of every person we meet. Maybe we aren’t supposed to be loved our entire life by everyone, yet we have a lifetime full of love when we meet the right one. Maybe we’re all handed our own silver platter that’s full of shit to see what we do with it.
I haven’t spoken to my parents since we traveled to Maine and shit hit the fan. They haven’t reached out, and neither have I.
I finally found the love I was looking for in Mason and our daughter. The love I know I deserve. I’m still a work in progress, but I know now that I am worthy and I am lovable. And that feeling? It’s freaking awesome. It didn’t happen all at once. It wasn’t an obvious sign, saying, He’s your one. But over time, it was clear that we were meant to be. I am his, and he is mine.
Maybe love doesn’t always hit you like a ton of bricks. Maybe sometimes, it slowly picks away at your soul until, one day, it consumes your entire body, making you feel like if you lose that person, you’ll never meet another one who fuels your soul the way that person does.
I hope, one day, my daughter feels as loved as I do now. Though I know with Mason and me as parents, feeling loved will never be a problem.
I’m so engrossed in my thoughts that I miss Mason lay Haven down in the hospital crib before he appears next to me. I see him reach into his pocket, and he pulls out a box.
He kneels next to the bed.
I must be dreaming. There is no way in hell a day could be this good.
Gliding his thumb along my cheek, he says, “Anna Eubanks, I’ve been drawn to you since the moment I sat across from you at dinner when you were with my brother. I was intrigued with what could be behind those beautiful green eyes of yours. I knew the world wasn’t getting the whole story, and I needed to know more. Putting you in the friend zone in college was just something I had to do to protect myself from getting hurt or distracted. But let’s face it; I was distracted, thinking of you every single day. You consumed me. You aren’t the one because you got pregnant and I was lucky enough to be the dad. You’re the one because I feel like you make me whole. I feel like you make me something other than a football player who runs his mouth. Because of you, I am a better man. Now, you’ve given me the most precious gift—our daughter. I don’t know what life has in store. I don’t know how many babies we will have. I don’t know if we’ll win the Super Bowl this weekend or if I’ll even be able to play because all I’ll want is to be with you and our sweet angel. But I know one thing: I’ll always be here for you and her. I’ll never leave you, and I’ll always make you both feel loved. So, please, please, please, Anna … make me the happiest man in the world, make this day even better than it already is, and marry me?”
I wipe my eyes. “Oh my gosh, yes, of course. I love you. I love you so much.” I lean up and kiss his lips. Soaking his face with my own tears. “But, babe?”
“Yeah?” he asks.
“You need to win the Super Bowl this weekend. Trent would never let you live it down if you didn’t. Imagine how bad he’d gloat.”
His eyes widen as he nods. “So true. That would be fucking horrible, wouldn’t it?”
I laugh and lean into him. His touch alone always gives me great comfort. As weird as it sounds, he’s home to me. After years of running and feeling like I had no one, he’s my person.
Trent’s and Mason’s first season in the NFL, and they are going head-to-head in four days to play in the Super Bowl. Both are insanely good teams. And while I’ve always been a Patriots fan, I’ve got to go ahead and say my now-fiancé has converted me to a New York Giants girl.
“Mase?”
“Yeah?”
“What if we could make the day even better?”
He cocks his head to the side. “Meaning?”
“What if we could get a pastor here to marry us today?”
He doesn’t answer right away. Leaving me to believe he thinks it’s a shit idea.
I frown. “We don’t have to. I’m sure you’ll want your mom and friends there and—”
He cuts me off, “Do you care if any of our friends or family are here?”
I shake my head. “No. Honestly, I think the moment would be more special with you, me, and Haven. Also, aside from Cameran, who else would I have?” I ask him honestly.
He cups my cheeks. “I agree. Oh, and your huge mesh panties the nurse gave you, they’ll be here.”
I glare at him. “Leave my panties alone. They are comfortable. Pushing a human out of your hoo-ha is hard work, jerk. I’m going to ask for ten more pairs to go home with.” I am too. These things are God’s gift to mamas.
He laughs. “I’m kidding. You did so good. Let me go make some phone calls and find someone to come in and make you my wife!” He pumps his fist in the air and then gets up, exiting the room. But not before checking on Haven for the twentieth time.
Two hours later, at six at night, my soon-to-be husband and Jenn—a wife of one of Mason’s teammates, who is a justice of the peace—are gathered around my hospital bed, Haven in my arms.
We go through the vows, which are short and simple. Just the way we want them to be. It’s perfect.
“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss your bride,” Jenn announces.
“Thank fuck,” Mason mumbles and kisses me. It’s sweet yet passionate, and comfortable yet filled with desire.
The way he looks at me? Every girl should experience that at some point in her life.
I just had a baby, my hair is a mess, I’ve got zero makeup on, and I’m in a damn hospital gown and mesh panties, for God’s sake. Yet here he is, looking at me like I’m the most beautiful girl in the world. We could have had the big wedding. With all the fancy stuff—the white dress, the tux, the flowers everywhere. But this? This is raw. This is us. There will never be a rawer yet more beautiful day than this. And that’s what love is. It’s raw; it’s imperfect. It’s unplanned and chaotic. But it’s also everything. And this right here is my everything.
He is my everything.
Mason
Super Bowl Day
Holy fucking shit. We did it.
We actually beat the New England Patriots and won the Super Bowl my rookie year in the NFL.
My teammates and I jump together. Smashing helmets and shoulder pads and everything else in the process. This is what we worked our asses off all season for, and we did it. We get to call ourselves champions. We each played a big part in making this dream come true. We worked together and got it done.
It makes leaving my new wife and four-day-old baby girl almost justifiable. That fucking sucked. I won’t lie. I’m not going to say I wanted to cry like a little bitch, leaving them, because, well, that would make me a pussy, but yeah, I totally did. What can I say? I’m a family man now.
I brought Anna and the baby home yesterday morning though. And both were doing great. I felt like a bag of flaming dog shit, leaving so soon, but Anna basically shoved me out the door. Apparently, her chest is leaking, and her body is sore. She didn’t want to fight with me about this. She knew it was important, and because she loves me so damn much, she told me I had no choice and that they would watch and cheer me on from the TV. The thought of her at home with my baby girl right now, rocking in her new glider after watching my team win the Super Bowl, feels pretty amazing. More amazing than anything I have ever known.
“Congratulations, old boy. Next year, it’ll be confetti with the Pats’ colors though. So, don’t get too comfortable,” Trent says and smacks my shoulder.
Both teams played one hell of a game. Battling back and forth for the lead the entire time. In the end, we won by a single touchdown in the last minute and twelve seconds.
I grin at him. “Don’t be so sure of that, brother. Awesome game though. You have a damn good wide receiver to work with. I mean, not as good as me, but still impressive.”
Shaking his head, he laughs lightly. I’m sure this loss was hard for him to accept, b
ut I know he’s also happy for me.
“All right, Daddy Mason. Whatever you say.” He says it as a joke. He doesn’t mean anything by it.
But little does he know the amount of love I feel for that tiny bundle. My daughter has given me a different purpose in life. And now, she and my smoking-hot wife are my number one priority. And they always will be.
“Mason,” comes from behind me.
Turning, I see my father standing there, shifting from one foot to another, clearly uncomfortable.
I tilt my chin up and down. “Dad. You made it.”
He looks down at the ground and then back up. “I wouldn’t have missed it. So, uh, I hear you are going to be a dad.”
A twang of guilt hits me. I never did get around to calling him and telling him Haven was born. I was so consumed with Anna and our new baby girl that my dad never crossed my mind.
“Actually, she was born four days ago. Haven Rose.”
His face falls for a split second. Unmistakable hurt filling his features. “Oh, wow. Congratulations.” I begin to open up my mouth to explain that I didn’t purposely not call when he chuckles lightly. “Four days ago was your birthday.”
I nod and grin. “It sure was, and she was the perfect birthday gift.”
“I bet she was.” I can tell he’s nervous to say the next words. “I would love to meet her sometime. If you don’t mind.”
My eyebrows pull together. I really can’t fathom how my father allowed us to get here. To a place where my own dad is uncomfortable around me and I’m uncomfortable around him. But I guess that’s water under the bridge now.
I touch his shoulder. “Yeah, Dad. Anna and I would love that. Come by anytime.”
His face lights up with obvious relief. “Thanks, Mason. I certainly will.”
“Oh, and, Dad?”
“Yeah?”
“I went and saw Maverick when I was playing in California. He, uh, sort of filled me in on everything with Miranda’s father.”
His eyes widen. “He did?”
“Yeah. And while it doesn’t excuse you leaving my mom the way you did, it all makes sense now why you did it. I get it. I’m not condoning it. But I get it now.”
“Mason, I’m so sorry that it came to that. He was a very dangerous man. I was worried he could hurt your mom or you. I was afraid he would ruin her life. I felt like I had no choice.”
I shrug. “Nothing we can do about it now, is there?”
He shakes his head sadly. “No. I wish there were. But I do have to tell you, I left Miranda. I couldn’t live that way anymore. I just couldn’t. I hope you and I can have a fresh start.”
I’m glad he left her. He was never happy, and as resentful as I’ve been over the years, even I don’t want to see him in a relationship that makes him unhappy.
“Me too,” I answer honestly. And I mean those two words. I do want a fresh start with him.
epilogue
Anna
Five Years Later
“Dang, my husband looks hot,” Cameran gushes as we watch our guys battle it out on Trent’s field, Gillette Stadium.
I shake my head. “Not as hot as mine.”
“Eh, to each their own, right?” She winks and passes her daughter, Gracelynn, her sippy cup.
She turned one a few months ago and is an adorable little beauty with curly blonde hair and blue eyes. She is Cam’s mini-me.
Gracelynn points her chubby finger to Haven. Haven is five years old and loves Gracelynn dearly. I wish she felt the same way about her brother. Kidding. I know she loves her brother, but damn, those two fight constantly and drive me insane. Knox is three, and he’s the spitting image of his daddy. Always needing to be an instigator and push buttons.
“Mommy, is Daddy’s team kicking Uncle Trent’s team’s butt?” Haven asks while climbing into my lap.
I shake my head. “Sorry to say, girlfriend, but Daddy’s team is getting their butt kicked right now.”
She dramatically throws a hand on her forehead. “Ugh. Come on, Daddy! Get it together.”
Cameran and I throw our heads back, laughing. Haven always has a way of being extra dramatic. I’ll never admit that she gets it from me.
“Are you guys going out to Lane’s next week?” Cameran asks before shoving another Sour Patch Kid in her mouth.
I nod. “Yeah, we are. I’m excited to get away and go down there. Please tell me you guys are still going.”
“Yes, ma’am. I needed to find someone to watch Hank, but luckily, a friend of mine is going to stay at the house with him.”
Cam and her damn dog, Hank. I swear she thinks he’s a child. I guess I can’t talk. I’m the same way with our cat, Lexi.
Going down to Florida for a few days will be good for all of us. I’d like to go for longer, but football season doesn’t really allow many trips. Still, I’ll take what I can get.
“Maybe baby number two will be made in Florida,” I joke, nudging Cameran’s arm.
Her cheeks redden slightly, and she stiffens. “Yeah, maybe.”
“You little bitch. You’re pregnant, and you didn’t tell me.”
“Shh,” she says. “Trent wanted to tell you and Mason at the same time. You can’t say anything.”
I pull her into a hug at my side. “I guess Mase and I’d better get busy if we’re going to be pregnant together this time!”
It has always been my and Cam’s dream to be pregnant together. Maybe this will be our chance.
We make our way down to the field once the game ends. Haven spots her daddy, and her little legs carry her as fast as they can to him. He reaches down and picks her up, swinging her around in the air.
“Good job, Daddy! Even though you lost!” she says and squeezes him.
“Thanks, love. Can’t win all of ’em.”
“Or most of them,” Trent says with a cough from behind him, Gracelynn on his shoulders.
“Uncle Trenty and Cam are having a baby!” Knox yells while appearing in the middle of everyone.
Trent’s head whips around to Cameran, who shrugs and starts laughing.
“I’m sorry, babe! You know how Anna is; she can read me like a book!”
Trent dramatically rolls his eyes while sulking. “I never get to be the one to announce the news.”
Once Mason sets Haven down, he pulls me in for a hug, pressing a kiss to my mouth. “Guess we’d better get busy since you and Cameran have a weird thing about wanting to be pregnant together one time,” he murmurs against my hair.
“Can we try when we get home?” I wink.
His eyes fill with mischief. “Is that a promise?”
I nod. “You know it is.”
I never imagined life could be this incredible and full of love. Looking at sweet Gracelynn and how happy Cameran and Trent are and seeing my own children, Haven and Knox, in jerseys with their daddy’s name on the back, it’s like a dream come true.
I never did resolve things with my parents or my sister, and that’s okay. I have so much love in my life that I no longer crave their love and acceptance. Mason shows me every single day how loved and appreciated I am. And the love I have for my children? Oh my, I never knew it was possible to love and be loved so deeply. So, all in all, life is good.
Sometimes, you find love and comfort when you least expect it, from people you least expect it from. I’ve learned not everything always needs to be picture-perfect. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t exactly what you need. This is my perfect. And I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
acknowledgments
Ican’t believe my second book has made it outside of my imagination and into the universe. I can honestly say that I am very proud of Anna and Mason’s story, and I am so excited to share it with the rest of the world! These characters have become such a huge part of my life.
First and foremost, thank you to my incredible family. My two daughters and my husband are the driving force behind my dreams as an author. They make me want to be the very best version of myself a
nd earn my way into this new world of writing.
Tatum Hanscom. Once again, between the moral support you constantly provide and for being a loyal beta reader, your encouragement and honest feedback have helped bring this book to life. Thank you for taking the time to read this book in its not-so-perfect form.
Autumn Ganz. You, my friend, are an absolute godsend. Thank you for the endless hours, the priceless advice, and most importantly, the immeasurable patience that you provide me with. You have helped me transition into an author by making it as painless as possible. I cannot thank you enough.
Jovana Shirley at Unforeseen Editing. My work is certainly not the easiest to edit. It is raw. And it is messy. But it’s mine, and that’s something you never take away from me. Instead, you wave your magic wand over my words and bring new life to them. Polishing them to near perfection. You are so patient with me, and it is so appreciated. You have a great talent as an editor, and I am so honored that I get to work with you.
My parents. The ones who believe in me when I have a hard time believing in myself, you have made this dream possible. Your endless love and encouragement are second to none, and I hope you know how appreciated you are. I love you both more than words can say.
For my readers, YOU are the ones who make this all worth it. The feeling of reaching even just one of you with my story, it’s unexplainable. I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to read my words. It means the world to me. Thank you. You all rock!
about the author
Hannah Gray spends her days in vacationland, living in a small, quaint town on the coast of Maine. She is an avid reader of contemporary romance and is always in competition with herself to read more books every year.