“I can’t promise that. People who are in a relationship do hurt each other sometimes. I can be a thoughtless jerk. I’m sure Olivia has faults, although I haven’t come across them yet. So I’ll promise you that I’ll do my best.”
I loved that he was so honest, but I didn’t really know how Momma would take it. Lloyd liked him. I could tell. If Momma decided she didn’t, she’d make my life hell.
Not that it was her business, but…this was the way it was.
I realized that Xavier had figured that out earlier. He knew he had to make things right with not only me but my family.
“Well, that’s honest, and that’s the best anyone can do. So you make sure you try, and enough with the rough language,” Momma added.
Holy shit. He’d actually scored points with Momma. I don’t think even Royce had ever gotten this far with her.
Probably because he was Royce, I thought with a snicker.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, his grin widening.
At that moment, with perfect timing, the hostess called my name. As we walked in, Xavier whispered in my ear, “No problem at all, darlin’,” he added, putting a terrible approximation of a drawl on the last word.
“You have no idea what you have avoided,” I whispered back.
“Oh, I do,” he said. “But I like her. She’s what a mom is supposed to be.”
I didn’t have an answer for that. I remembered what he’d told me about his mom, and all that I’d ever read.
So I squeezed his hand as we went into dinner.
Xavier
After dinner was over, I felt pretty good. Olivia hadn’t been kidding. Her mother was intimidating. But I remembered that Olivia appreciated honesty over everything else I’d done, or not done. She didn’t want bullshit.
I figured her mother would be the same way.
What I did, although I would never admit it to anyone else, was picture Tibby as an old lady, defending her daughter. Tibby had defended me, on more than one occasion. She was ferocious.
This was a lady who loved her kid so much that she went into business with her, and then went all out to protect her after her divorce.
Olivia said her mother was her best friend. So it wasn’t hard to figure out I’d be facing a hard ass.
She was quiet as we drove back to her place.
“Can I stay?” I asked. I didn’t want to assume, although it made sense to me.
Olivia glanced over at me, and said, “Yes, please.”
Nothing more.
Well, shit. That would suggest things weren’t settled in Ms. Olivia’s mind.
When we got into her house, her phone went off, and it was like a siren in the quiet of the place. She looked at it, made a noise that indicated great disgust, and ignored it.
When she made eye contact, I raised my eyebrows in question.
“The ass,” she said.
“Oh, well, fuck him,” I answered cheerfully. “Let’s talk about something else.”
“I can’t believe how you talked to my mother.” She smiled as she said that.
“Your mom is your BFF, and I got the impression she doesn’t put up with shit. So I thought it better to meet her on her terms. Plus, I like her. I like that she fights for you.” I wasn’t lying. I would have loved a mom who fought for me like Olivia’s did for her.
“She liked you, I could tell,” Olivia looked kind of shy.
“I’m glad. I want her to.” I went to her and wrapped my arms around her the way I wanted to wrap myself around her.
“Are we okay?” I asked.
I heard her sigh. When she didn’t answer right away, I wanted to sigh myself. I was right. All was not well. Better to get it out on the table now.
“I feel like an ass,” she confessed. “I assumed all sorts of terrible things, assumptions you didn’t deserve because you’re not…well, you’re you, and no one else.”
Damn it. I knew she was thinking about her ex. But I just nodded, and let her keep talking.
“I had all kinds of crazy talk in my head, and I figured you were lying to me because I wasn’t enough, didn’t belong to the world you live in…all that sort of thing.”
I let go of her, moving her away so that I could see her. “Olivia, if I didn’t want to be with you, I’d just tell you.”
She threw up her hands and walked to the other end of the kitchen. “I know! That’s what makes sense, and that’s what you’d think normal, rational adults do, but I’m in the middle of a divorce that’s about to get mean because he couldn’t just tell me and leave. It’s always easier to say these kinds of things!”
Olivia turned back toward me, and I could see the intensity in her over what she was saying. I held out my hands.
“Listen, I get it. If I were you, I’d be pretty low on trust. I’m not the most trusting person myself. But I don’t lie, and if I don’t want to be with you, I will tell you. You have to believe me on that. What can I do to prove this to you?”
Normally, I would say fuck it and move along. But this wasn’t normal, and Olivia was worth the effort.
“It’s why I called Jazmine and let you listen in. I wanted you to know there was nothing for you to worry about.”
“This is your life, Xavier! This kind of thing happens a lot, doesn’t it?”
I thought about it for a minute before I answered. Did it?
“Yeah, it does. I don’t even think about it anymore. It’s just…there.”
Olivia looked miserable. “I know that. I know it, and it still hurts me like hell. I don’t have any real claim on you—”
I strode to her and kissed her. “Oh, I think you do.”
Her cheeks pinked. “Well, okay, there’s a claim, but we’re still getting to know each other, and I have to understand this is part of your life, but I am really struggling with it.”
I gathered her close again. “None of that matters. You are the one I want to be with. It’s you I choose to be with. Yeah, there’s always some chick who has other ideas, but I don’t. You are the only one I want to be with. Can you believe that? Can you trust that if that changes, I will tell you? I’ll be upfront, and I won’t be a dick?”
She stared at me, and it felt like she was looking to stare down my soul. Honestly, it was unnerving. But I knew, I just knew, that if I didn’t give it my all with her, I would, as I told her before, be kicking my own ass.
“I can try,” she said. “I won’t lie to you either. I’m struggling.”
“I get it. I know that I’m not the easiest person to deal with. My life is a pain in the ass for just about anybody else. It’s a pain in the ass for me, and I love it. It’s okay for you to take some time to figure out how to manage the shit that comes along with me.” I felt bad. I did have a lot of shit.
She looked sad. “No, this isn’t your fault. You don’t deserve this from me. You haven’t done anything to have me get all bananas.”
“I didn’t call you when I said I would.”
“Well, that’s first date kind of stuff. Not the end of the world. And you made up for it pretty well,” she smiled.
Which made me happy. It was the first genuine smile I’d seen from her since we’d left Monell’s.
I smiled and kissed her.
“Okay, I know I’m totally a pig, but could you indulge me? Is it possible we could get naked together?”
Her laugh was the best thing I’d heard all weekend. “You are honest, aren’t you?”
“Yes, I am. I know you’re mad—well, you were mad as hell at me, and this is not really ideal, but I’ve been thinking about being with you all weekend, and it’s making me crazy. You smell good enough to eat,” I finished.
She ran her fingers through my hair. I felt a chill go through my whole body. She was that intoxicating. Even a little touch like this made me insane.
“Okay. I think it’s a good idea. Even though I’ve been mad as hell, I was thinking about you naked, too.”
“Well, hot damn tamale, Charlie.”
“I’m a tamale now?”
“Yeah. Habanero hot.”
We both laughed.
“Olivia, I know this isn’t easy. This isn’t your life. But I will make this as easy as I can, and you have to trust me, okay?”
When her eyes came up to mine, I could see the smile in them.
“Okay. But I reserve the right to get you a floozy swatter.”
We were both laughing again as I carried her into her bedroom.
14
Olivia
I stretched on Monday morning, feeling rested and sated. Makeup sex really is the best.
Beside me, Xavier was still asleep. His breath was soft, but I could tell that he wasn’t even near waking.
Which was kind of nice. I wanted to lay here, to think about this weekend.
Not even Momma knew the depth of my crazy.
I felt like I was going insane. I couldn’t get all the thoughts out of my head. Not only thoughts that Xavier was lying to me, but that once again, I was wrong, wrong, wrong, and I couldn’t be trusted to tie my shoes, much less be in a relationship.
That I had been wrong about Royce, and he was still trying to screw me. What if I was wrong about Xavier? Or, worse, what if I wasn’t good enough for him? He needed someone strong, someone who could handle all the aspects of his life.
Given this weekend, I wasn’t sure that could ever be me.
But he’d asked me to try. And he’d said that he would make sure he did whatever he could to make it easier for me.
When had a man ever gone out of his way for me?
Royce certainly hadn’t.
Part of me felt reassured, and part of me was uneasy. This was new territory, and I wasn’t sure I could be comfortable.
My musing was interrupted when Xavier reached out and pulled me close to him.
“You’re so warm,” I said, wrapping my arms over the top of his.
“Mmmhmmm….you’re not warm enough,” he muttered.
“I do have to go to work,” I said, as he scooted closer.
“Right this minute?”
“Well, no.”
“It’s good to be the boss, isn’t it?”
I faced him, and he traced the line of my body from my cheek down to my thigh. “You are so lovely.”
“Even now?” I teased.
“Especially now.”
I kissed him and felt myself go up in flames. Every time I got close like this, any sort of rational anything went right out the window. It was probably naked, too.
“Why don’t you stay here with me this morning?”
“I can’t keep…taking…vacation,” I said, kissing him between words.
“Why not?”
“I’m not an artist who is expected to be all higgledy-piggledy with my schedule like you. I have to show up in the office. Or things start to get dicey.”
“Higgledy-piggledy? What the hell does that mean?” He started to laugh.
It felt so nice to hear someone laugh with me in this house. Not at me, or with someone on the phone, but with me.
“Crazy, all willy-nilly, cattywampus,” I said.
“I love the way you talk,” he nuzzled my neck. “And I have my own schedule to keep, Ms. Bossy Britches. I just work a lot, so that when I want to take time off, I can. Do you ever take a vacation?”
I opened my mouth to say, Yes, of course, when I realized it had been three years since I’d taken a vacation. Royce had…well, it didn’t matter what Royce did. As with most thing I was seeing, it was clear that Royce hadn’t been on my team for quite some time, a lot longer than I’d realized.
Would I ever get past the point where a new betrayal didn’t insert itself into my life on a regular basis? This seemed to be a daily thing.
“Uh, huh. That’s what I thought. You have to think about it. That means you haven’t taken enough. Take one with me.”
“Right now?”
“No, I have a lot to do, in spite of what you might think. I got to get this tour organized, and I have some new stuff I’m playing with…I don’t know, it might not be anything, but I need to work through with it. Let’s go away right before the tour. Then we can both have a break, and you can devote yourself to me because for the next four months, I won’t be able to see you much. Unless,” he stopped, thinking.
“Unless what?”
“Unless you come on tour with me?”
“The whole time?”
“Well, no. You can’t leave your business, can you? I’d have you the whole time, but I’m realistic, and know you can’t just toss life aside and indulge in my greedy bastard wants.” He grinned widely.
“How do you not have morning breath?” I blurted out. All I could smell was how warm and inviting he smelled. I figured mine was awful, but I couldn’t do anything about it. But his breath didn’t smell bad at all.
“Because I’m sweet through and through,” he came back swiftly. “One more reason for you to be with me.”
“The magical morning breath?” I started to giggle.
“You know it,” he kissed me fiercely.
I gave up at that point. I could be late to work.
Xavier
The smell from the bathroom filled the room. Whatever Olivia used in the shower, the smell came out and spread out across the bedroom with the steam. It was light and fruity. I liked it. I liked being here in her place, feeling her in every part of this room.
I knew that she had lived here with her ex, but he didn’t seem to be present. I mean, why would he? He’d moved out. But this place didn’t even have the memory of his flavor. The flavor of shit, I snickered.
I knew she struggled. I knew that it was going to be hard. But nothing—nothing—I’d seen so far had shown me that this was a waste of time.
It made me think about Tibby and Seth. How she said they just knew, and things went from zero to one hundred miles an hour in an instant. That’s how this was.
I knew. This was the right one.
Thinking about today, I decided I’d take her to lunch, and then I had to get back. I’d already been gone longer than I planned, originally thinking I would be home Sunday night.
I had to get shit done so that I could start planning where she and I would spend the week before I went on tour. Hopefully, she’d consider coming on tour with me on some stops. That would be fun. I’d miss her all the time she wasn’t with me, and I wasn’t kidding when I said I wouldn’t see her much. We scheduled the shit out of me when I went on tour because I went out every couple of years. I couldn’t get anything else done if I toured yearly.
The pilot answered on the second ring. “Hi, Xavier. You okay?”
“I am. Can we get back to New York today?”
“What time?”
“Say two p.m.? I have a lunch I need to go to, and then I’ll be ready to go,” I said. Well, I wouldn’t be ready to leave, but I did have to go.
“Yeah, that works. Brent called, and he needs us tomorrow, so that will give us time to run through things before his flight.”
“No one else has been calling you, have they?” I hoped not. Normally I wasn’t this schizophrenic with my travel. “And you have a pick-up in LA for Marcus and Kristine next week, right?”
“You’re all good. No one else has been put out,” Kirby, the pilot, knew what I was talking about. “And I have that flight scheduled.”
“Good. Make sure you get some good champagne for the flight, too. They just got married. Put it on my bill specifically.”
“Got it. See you this afternoon.”
I hung up as Olivia came out of the bathroom, in a robe with her hair in a towel. She was pink and smelled amazing.
“What’s up?”
“I am sadly arranging my ride home. I really do have to get back.”
“Of course you do. I understand.”
I held her face in my hands. “Do you? You’re really okay? I need you to be honest with me.”
She nodded. “I am. What time do you have to go?
”
“My flight leaves at two.”
“I’ll take you to the airport,” she started drying her hair with the towel.
I loved that she felt comfortable enough to get ready in front of me. Even if it was just this little bit. Most of the women I dated only came out once they were totally done. This felt…nice.
“No need. I’ll get a car. You need to work, too, remember?” I teased. “But I am taking you to lunch. Where do you want to go?”
“I have a place if you like little local places.”
“Love ‘em.”
“Well, go get ready, and I’ll finish up. I’m hungry! It’s all this strenuous exercise.”
I laughed as I went into the bathroom and closed the door.
It smelled awesome in here, like Olivia.
Thank God I still had one clean change of clothes. I’d had a bag on the plane, planning to come and see her.
I stepped into the shower, enjoying the steam. This was an awesome shower, with two of those big square waterfall shower heads, and jets on the wall. It was extravagant, and I wondered if she’d designed it.
In spite of the amazing shower, I managed to get ready in a decent amount of time—it was hard to get out of the shower—and we headed out for lunch. Olivia drove.
“Where are we going?”
“It’s this little place called Hattie B’s. They do chicken, and their specialty is hot chicken.”
“What makes the hot chicken special?” I wasn’t sure if she was serious.
“You’ll see. I love it. It’s total comfort food.”
“I am all for comfort food.”
“I thought you might be,” Olivia grinned. “There shouldn’t be too bad of a line,” she added.
“There’s a line for lunch?”
“There can be. I always seem to go when there’s a line, but I’m not rushing into work, and you have time before you have to leave.”
“Good, because I want to plan something next weekend with you. Will you come up to New York?”
She considered. “I think I can. Can I get back to you? I want to double check at work.”
Forgotten Wishes: Djinn Everlasting Book Two Page 18