“What’s that?” He scoots away from my edge of the bed. “You’re not going to inject me with something are you!”
“No, there’s a balloon of fluid at the end of that catheter inside of you holding it in, you really want me to deflate that before I take it out, trust me,” I reassure him, and his face relaxes slightly as I turn and put my gloves on, silently wishing someone would reassure me.
“You look really sexy in that outfit putting your gloves on, looking at my cock,” he says crassly.
“I’m a nurse Evan, this is not my first rodeo, so try to get your mind out of the gutter,” I snap, but I’m feeling a bit like I’m in a porn flick right now, and more than a little apprehensive. I have to really touch him to do this, like touch him, touch him. But he’s awake, so at least I don’t feel like I’m assaulting him. His eyes follow my gloved, shaky hands to the catheter, I attach the syringe and let out the fluid from the balloon, and as carefully and clinically as possible I grasp his penis toward the base and ease the catheter out of him. He inhales sharply. Unbelievably he’s at half-mast, and I turn my head to look him in the eyes and remove my hands.
Before I can move to throw the catheter away and remove my gloves, he reaches up and takes my face in both hands, pulling me toward him and kissing me quickly and softly on the lips. He whispers, “That hurt.” Jerking upright and stepping back, I’m speechless. That was so inappropriate, not to mention unexpected; I was taking out his catheter for God’s sake, what a time to make a pass! And we can scratch gay off the list of questions…for sure.
“Uh…. Sorry, I guess I figured you’d know it wouldn’t be comfortable,” I say, throwing out the contents of my hands. “What was that?” I finally ask.
“A kiss Mia, I can familiarize you further with my kisses if you come back over here, I’m sure you’ve been kissed before.”
“But wh…. why…?” I stutter.
“Because you were finally close enough to me, and with you holding my dick in your hands, it seemed as good a time as any.” He’s so cocky, pun intended. This guy is so hard to follow.
“Oh…” I’m still shocked, and the earth shifts under my feet; my lips tingle where his touched mine and my heart flutters. I have a million butterflies in my stomach. There’s a knock at the door then and I realize he’s still exposed, and aroused. I moved swiftly and protectively to his side and cover him with the sheet, blanket and comforter attempting to disguise his growing erection. He’s smiling on one side of his mouth, eyebrows up, “What’s wrong, nurse Mia, don’t want to share?”
“No.. I mean Yes…I mean oh! Just cover yourself will ya, who knows who it is?!” I sputter. He knows he’s embarrassing me and he likes it…
“Come in!” Isaac enters the room with a bag from Dominus…he went all the way to the restaurant and back already? It doesn’t seem to be a place that would be open for breakfast. I wonder who cooked for him at this early hour.
“Your usual Sir and this,” Isaac drops a white gold chain with a rather large crucifix hanging from it into Evans open palm before automatically arranging the food on Evans bedside table, for all the world like he really is his wife. The food smells exquisite; an omelet made with only egg whites, bacon and fresh squeezed orange juice. Somebody who knows his preferences must have been cooking for him. My stomach growls loudly, and both men look up at me.
“Sorry, I need to go home and shower and get something to eat,” I say, while gathering up my purse and blushing; my damn stomach did that on cue I swear it!
“No, Mia….sit. Eat with me, you can’t leave…. do you work tonight?” Evan asked, trying unsuccessfully to keep the alarm out of his voice. Isaac looks up from the food, surprised by Evans response to me leaving.
“I’ll step out,” he says, and leaves the room abruptly.
“I don’t work tonight. I’m not scheduled for two more nights,” I inform him. He starts looking around the room nervously, clutching the sheets on both sides of the bed again, and a fine layer of perspiration forms on his forehead.
“Are you ok…. Evan?” No response. I sit on the edge of the bed and take one of his clenched hands in both of mine. “Evan…can you hear me? Do you know where you are?” I ask. Slowly he turns to look at me. “Mia?”
“Yes Evan, where did you go just now?” I ask.
“Where is Cameron?” he responds, the same question he asked me last night.
“Is that who was with you in the accident?”
“Yes…I told you that last night didn’t I?” I let out a breath I hadn’t realized I was holding, God I’m so relieved that he remembers.
“Yes, you did- was she your friend?”
“Yes…a friend, she worked for me in my club, the one here in Seattle,” he answers flatly, no emotion visible on his face. No other way to do this, he needs to know she’s dead. “Evan, the passenger in the car with you didn’t make it,” I say softly, and his hand grips mine so tightly it’s painful but I stay quiet.
“I know.”
“You do, so you remember the accident?”
“No, but I saw her floating next to me in the car, in the water- she was already dead, her eyes were open and so empty. She just stared at me….”
“Oh Evan I’m so sorry, do you need me to call your sister for you, maybe some family here with you would help?”
“No,” he snaps,, avoiding my eyes by looking at the wall opposite me.
“You know, she’s been coming every day to sit with you, your sister Gabriella,” I say. “I could hear her, I wish she hadn’t come.”
“Why Evan? She really seems to love you. She sat all day, every day by your side and made sure you had the best doctors, she even requested that only I take care of you if I was working.”
“She wasn’t here because she loves me, she was here because she fears me, and she knows if she let anything happen to me she’d be in a lot of trouble.” He’s looking at me now, sorrow spreading across his face as he continues. “She deserves everything I have and more, and if I die she gets it all. I’ve made sure of it.” I sit, stunned and confused. “Why do you think she fears you, I didn’t get that feeling at all.”
“You don’t know anything about us Mia, believe me when I tell you Gabriella is scared of me, I’m not saying any more about it, we’re done with this subject.” Hmmmm, well fine then!
“Has anyone called to tell her you’re awake?” I ask.
“I don’t know, you’re the only person besides Isaac I’ve spoken to, and the hostess at Dominus, to ask for Isaac. Don’t call her, I don’t want her here,” he orders, narrowing his eyes at me with a stern look.
“I promised her I would.”
“I don’t care, I do not want her called, understand?” His heart rate is accelerating and he’s let go of my hand.
“Ok, ok, I won’t call her but I hope you’ll reconsider.” A light knock at the door interrupts us. Evan calls, “Come in!” And Isaac pokes his head around the corner .
“Can I get you anything else sir?” he asks.
“No, just email me updates and schedules for the Seattle and Miami locations, you can go now.”
“Yes sir, I’ll send them right away sir.” Isaac closes the door and he’s gone.
“I need to leave too,” I say reluctantly, the magnetic pull between us is so strong it feels physically impossible to leave him. I have his full attention now and he reaches out to grasp my hand again.
“Come back.,” he says severely, his bright green eyes darkening. “Please?” I snort, and he hesitates, “Please come back.” He pleads with me.
“Since you asked me nicely I will,” I tease, but then ask seriously. “Why did you ask for me when you woke up?” I can’t keep from asking him this, it’s been nagging at me all night.
“I don’t know….I just knew I needed you,” he admits, reluctantly it seems.
“You needed me? But you hadn’t even met me…” His brow wrinkles into a frown. “I don’t fucking know. I just woke up and needed you,
I’d been listening to you but I couldn’t respond, I was paralyzed but I knew you were there and when I could finally move and speak you’re voice, your touch was all I could think of, all I could remember.”
I don’t know how to respond to his outburst of honesty, and a silence hangs between us as we stare at each other and my heart constricts; he seems so alone right now, and I realize he is alone. No family other than his sister, whom he has some serious problems with, co-workers that are petrified of him, and no girlfriend or wife at his bedside. Evan Lawson is completely alone in the world, and I have a feeling he’s made it this way on purpose, until now…until his mind wasn’t in control of his body; until me…
Chapter 9
“Just Another Day” by John Secada
Sitting on the edge of Evans bed I stroke his arm and hold his hand. Holy shit, his body is solid- he tenses slightly and moves his fingers over my knuckles slowly, his touch burning like fire and electricity combined. How am I going to get out of here and home to shower, I can hardly make myself leave the room to get him breakfast, let alone go all the way home. Evan is looking at me with anticipation, darkness in his eyes; the emotions that continuously cross his eyes worry me.
“Evan, I’m going to try and run home to shower and eat, but I promise I’ll come right back.”
“Do you have to go, what do you mean by try?”
Ok decision time- do I let him know how he affects me? Like a super nova, exploding in space, outshining the entire galaxy? Should I explain why it’s been an effort to leave his side every second since I first lay eyes him in that bed, or should I keep my heart safe and stay quiet? I’ve never had these feelings before, and for a virtual stranger it’s ridiculous that I’m having trouble tearing myself away. Men have pursued me in my life, and I’ve shot them down immediately every time, even if my body reacts positively. My mind rejects anything more than friendship from a man. Evan has shattered the glass separating my fear and my heart, without even trying. Maybe that was the key, the slow progression of my introduction to him in his unconscious state. I was allowed to explore his physical presence with no fear of him, with no response or judgment from him. I don’t know how it happened but it has, so I plunge in feet first and admit my feelings….
“It’s hard for me to leave you, it has been since the first time I lay eyes on you in that bed, so when I say try, I mean it takes a conscious effort to go.” So there it is, let’s see what he does with it. He’ll probably think I’m a needy, clingy nutcase.
Evan sits up, propping himself on one elbow letting go of my hand. Shit, that can’t be good, but it’s only for a moment, and then he reaches out with the same hand and tucks a long strand of hair behind my ear and feathers the back of his fingers down my cheek, resting his hand right above my breast. My heart stops beating, I don’t think I’m breathing…. “I don’t want you to go, I don’t know what it is, I don’t know a thing about you, but I’m drawn to you. I realize you can’t hold vigil at my bedside, but I need you to come back today, soon if you can…. Please,” he says please like its foreign and painful, but he said it. BREATHE; my heart is pounding with the lack of oxygen from all this holding of my breath. But he feels the same way, or at least it sounds like it. Relief spreads through my body, warm and comforting.
“I’ll be back in and hour, one hour, I promise.” I hold up one finger for emphasis. My experience as a nurse has taught me that giving a specific time that you will return can ease a patient’s anxiety. Wrinkling his brow and biting that sexy, full bottom lip for a long moment he finally concedes.
“Ok, an hour- one, I don’t want that other nurse giving me a bed bath.”
I smile wide and giggle, “Don’t worry, you won’t get a bath unless it’s from me.”
“Ok, go! The sooner you go, the sooner you’ll come back to me.”
“So now your pushing me out the door huh?” I tease, but his face darkens and I realize that must have not been the best choice of words.
“I’m kidding, just kidding,” I reassure him.
“I know, hurry up,” he commands, and I’m happy to comply. He moves his hand from above my breast down to my waist and nudges me to get up. I rise from the bed and slowly back out of the room cautiously like I’m backing away from a dangerous animal, through the door it clicks and I make a beeline for the elevator to avoid a new storm of questions from Callie.
Leaving the hospital I feel like I’m emerging from a fog…the Evan fog… Checking my phone for the first time since I left the club last night, I see 14 missed calls and 10 texts, all from of the girls and most from Lilly. Where the hell did you go? Who woke up? Mia!!! Answer me!! And on and on- I shoot a quick group text back to them; I’m fine, don’t worry, it was a patient at work sorry, I’ll call you later. There, I pray that appeases Lily, I can’t talk about any of this right now, I don’t even know what the hell I’d say. Uh yea, this crazy gorgeous patient I’ve been flirting with while he’s been in a coma for 8 days woke up and decided he couldn’t live without me so I had to go…sounds insane to me! Checking around me for strangers while I walk to my car, a habit I’ve perfected after 10 years of looking over my shoulder, I press the unlock button and hop in quickly, lock the doors and hurry home. I’ve learned this anxiety stems from knowing one of my kidnappers is still out there…somewhere. Years of expensive therapy and that’s what I’ve gotten, yea…nice… The morning is brisk and my bare legs are covered with goose bumps when I finally unlock the door to my apartment. Shower…I really need to clean up; sitting in a hospital chair in club clothes all night has left me feeling grimy. After I’m cleaned up and dressed in jeans, a cashmere sweater and flats, I braid my hair and drape it over my shoulder so it hangs in front. Grabbing my purse I dash out the door- it’s been 40 min, I have 20 to get back to him…Or what? He’ll panic, it’s completely irrational but I know he will, I gave him a specific time so he wouldn’t freak and I have to be punctual or security will be getting their morning workout in room 8.
“Wow, that was fast, why are you back you don’t work tonight…and its only noon?” Callie stops me on the way to Evans room. Oh god, how can I explain what I’m doing here when I don’t even know myself? I go with the truth, or at least a partial truth, “He asked me to come back, and hey did anybody call his sister last night?” I ask.
“Yea, I think Shea did, no answer though.”
“And she hasn’t been by today either?”
“Nope, which is weird too because she’s always here at 9.”
“Did Shea leave a message?”
“Yea I think so, why?”
“Oh nothing, I just wanted to make sure she knew he was awake, I promised her I’d call right away but it was kinda hectic last night and I wasn’t on duty,” I lie. I’m really just worried about what Evan said about not calling her.
“I think they are talking about moving him to a regular floor now that he’s not critical anymore,” Callie offers.
“Oh…that’s great,” I say with absolutely no enthusiasm; if he leaves my floor someone else will be taking care of him, and now I’m the one panicking.
“I better go see how he is.”
“Ok, Monica is his nurse today if he needs anything.”
“Ok.” I work my way down the bustling hall to his room, and when I enter he’s sitting up in bed with his laptop on his bed dark glasses propped on his head and various papers strewn around him. He looks up and I see pure relief in those bright green eyes and I feel it immediately, the pull. I go straight over to him as if we were close friends and sit down in my chair next to the bed.
“You came back,” he says softly.
“I said I would.”
“You look beautiful, I love the braid, I’d love to pull it.” His eyes darken with lust and my newfound blush spreads up my neck.
“Thank you I think, and you’d better watch yourself Mr. Lawson.” Crossing my arms over my chest and raising my eyebrows, I wait for a response but he continues to probe me with those shar
p green eyes. I cross my legs and fidget. Wow he’s good at this, I’m so uncomfortable and he loves it. A broad, panty-melting smile spreads across his face and he chuckles quietly, pulling his gaze from me he gathers the papers up and pats the bed beside him an invitation to sit with him…uh is he nuts? I never voluntarily get close to a man, ever. But I’ve been close to him, intimate actually, although that was different. He wasn’t leering at me like a puma then, ready to pounce on his prey.
“What, you want me to sit on the bed?” I ask, unable to control the rise in my voice.
“Yes. I do,” he says, the timbre of his voice filled with so much authority I actually want to comply. But if nothing else, I know it’s not a good idea with his leg in a cast.
“Um, I think I’m good right where I am, y... you know, your leg and all,” I stutter.
“Sit. Here, now,” he repeats, with a poignant pause after each word. He is so not used to being told no.
“No,” I snap defiantly.
“Oh nurse Mia, when I get out of this cast you’ll regret saying no to me, and for making me repeat myself. No one says no to me.”
“Oh really? Well you’d better get used to it if you want me to stay around, I don’t take kindly to bossiness.” I fidget again in my seat. I’d actually like nothing more than to crawl into that bed with him and touch every single muscle on his hard, sexy body, but I don’t dare admit it. I wonder if he remembers me touching him when he was unconscious? The fact that I’m even thinking thoughts like this floors me. Evan is the first man I’ve touched intimately since I was attacked. I had boyfriends in high school, but I never slept with them. The only thing I’ve ever associated sex with is violence, pain and suffering, and what he just said sure sounded like a threat. But somehow I know he wouldn’t hurt me, ever. I have no foundation to base this on, I just know it- this should all be so unfamiliar to me, but I feel a deep, undeniable connection to him. Unfolding my arms and crossing my legs the opposite direction I wait to see what’s coming next. Maybe a change in subject would help.
Dark Kiss (The Two sides of me Book 1) Page 6