“Yes, but you met him. That is more than you could have hoped for.” She stared at me, full on stared at me. “There is no reason to deny the truth.”
I looked away, but her eyes followed mine. I gave up avoiding her bright eyes. “I am thankful to know who he is.”
“He is smart, but he cannot know everything.” She reached behind her and put her hand in the water. The water rolled right off her skin as if she was waterproof.
I resisted the urge to ask her about that—to ask why she was impenetrable to it, but there were so many other questions to ask, questions that had nothing to do with the Elder. I waited nervously for her to continue, to tell me more about what my father didn’t know. I was already so confused about my father, I didn’t need more fuel to add to that fire.
After a few moments she removed her hand from the water. “Your father’s plan forgot a key piece.”
I thought back on where our earlier conversation had dropped off. “Gregor?”
“Yes.”
“He forgot him?” That seemed unlikely.
“He forgot no plan will work as long as Gregor is around.”
“That is an important detail to forget.” My dad had gone to great lengths to help me, and I found it unlikely he could have made such a big mistake.
“He assumed with James gone, the darkness would be too. His vision on the realms of the living is limited by the life he lived.”
“Wait. What?” James gone? My chest clenched and my stomach churned.
She laughed. “Wait. You did not figure that part out on your own?” She gave me a puppy dog look. “How cute.”
“Cute?” Rage flowed through me. “Not even a little.”
“Fine I will save us some time. The flower is to give to Charlotte. She thinks it is to provide a longer life for her unborn child, but it is to counteract the poison and your reliance on James to live. Only the Essence can wield the flower in such a way, and it can only be used on one who can survive the flower’s power. As you have Winthrop blood you will survive. Got it?”
I had heard her words and processed them, but that didn’t mean I fully understood them. “But what about destroying James? Charlotte wouldn’t do that? They are so close.” She worried for him. She loved him. Their relationship was complicated, but I found it impossible to imagine her killing him.
“Yet her army is marching toward him.” Arabella whirled her hand around.
“Wait, is that happening still? This time travel thing is confusing.”
“Yes, it will still happen.”
“She doesn’t plan to kill him; she thinks she can help him.” I had to believe that. I refused to believe years of friendship could be so easily brushed aside.
“The whole reason for using the flower is to save you while destroying James. As the Essence she cannot destroy light. Only dark.”
“This seems like a lot to do just to save me.” My head throbbed. I needed James, but that wasn’t an option yet. I had to get answers and hopefully some help.
“I already told you. You are a daughter of Belgard. A true daughter. You are rare and your people would protect you at all costs.” Arabella’s words were sharp, piercing even. She didn’t like my family—or at least that’s how it came across to me. Maybe she didn’t like anyone.
“I find that hard to believe.” So far my experiences had been the exact opposite. Plus, no one even knew who I was. I had only just learned the truth myself.
“Believe what you wish.” She shrugged. “You will be the one hurt.”
“I refuse to let anything happen to James.” He wasn’t dark no matter what anyone said. It wasn’t his fault his father refused to let him go. He had spent years trying to change his reputation only to have his father reach out from the grave—or wherever it was he was hiding— to mess things up again for him.
“I admire your dedication to him. Such care is rare these days.”
“It shouldn’t be rare. You are supposed to care.”
“There is another way.” She ran her nails over the stone bench separating us.
“What way?” I was willing to do just about anything, but I didn’t like how excited she looked. We were talking about life and death, not shopping.
“You could choose to sacrifice yourself instead.” Her eyes lit up.
Sacrifice myself? I let the words sink in. Would I do that? Yes. The answer came far too quickly. I was willing to trade my life for a man I hadn’t known long. But length of time had nothing to do with it. Nothing at all. “I would do anything, but would that really help?” There has to be another way. I needed that thought to be true, but what if there wasn’t? What if this was it, and the choice was really my life for his?
“Stop.” Arabella held up her hand. “I bet you are viewing this as a choice. You or him?”
“Yes. And he wins. James has to win.”
“But it is not two equal choices. Not at all.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“You are the vessel. The darkness will eventually die out without you.”
“So if I die, the darkness can’t consume everything?” I hadn’t considered that possibility before. Maybe that was a good thing. Having a better understanding might have made me chicken out. I didn’t want to die. There was so much more I wanted to do, but if it could end the darkness? If it could save everyone else I loved? If it could save James. It all went back to James, like a never ending obsession.
“Not so fast.” Arabella’s lips curled into a smile. “What would James do if you died?”
He would freak out truly and completely. That wasn’t me over inflating how much he cared. I understood how strong the bond was between us. He would absolutely lose his mind if I died, but what did that mean? Did that actually change anything? And why was she so happy? I shouldn’t have cared about her mood, but it made the conversation even harder. It was so much worse. “He would be devastated.”
“And he would do something stupid. You know that as well as I do. My guess is his grief would set off the darkness that still exists in him.”
The darkness would still exist? My sacrifice would still leave darkness? “Then what are you suggesting? How can I change the way he’d respond to my death?”
“He will only react that way if you two are bound.” She wound her fingers together. “He would still be sad, but not enough to destroy the very worlds you sacrificed your life to save.”
“The kindred bond.” I thought over her words. There was only one bond for her to mean.
“Yes.” Arabella leaned forward. “That bond.”
“So what are you suggesting exactly?” I both wanted to know and didn’t. I knew I wasn’t going to like any of her suggestions. She had suggested I sacrifice myself after all.
“I suggest you let me help you, honey.”
Honey? That was a random endearment. “Help me?”
“I will give you the flower so Charlotte can break the bond. Then I will aid you in your sacrifice if you so choose.”
“And what do you get?” I narrowed my eyes.
“Why would I want to get something?” She tapped her finger nails again.
“You want something.” I wasn’t going to play around. She might have been a super powerful creature, but she could still put her cards on the table.
She stopped tapping. “I want the power in the bond. As you know, it is one of the most powerful bonds ever created. This helps both of us.” She put her hand on my arm. “It is the only viable choice you have.”
There was no such thing as ‘only choice.’ Unfortunately I wasn’t aware of any other. I didn’t trust Arabella, but my father must have sent me to her for a reason.
However according to Arabella my father had been wrong before. “What about Gregor?”
“What about him?” She twisted some of her hair around her fingers.
“You said no plan works without considering him.” Had she seriously forgotten that already? Impossible. This was all part of her plan to me
ss with me.
“Gregor will die when you die.” She looked away.
“Uh, I’m not following?” How was that possible? Nothing was that simple.
“You are the vessel. He needed you in order to get his power. His decision to throw you in the lake had nothing to do with hurting you. He was forging you—strengthening you so to speak—into a stronger vessel. In doing so, you two became linked. When you die, he will die.”
“How can you be sure?” I wasn’t sacrificing myself in vain.
“Because Gregor is not human, Ainsley. He is pure darkness. Blake destroyed the human part of Gregor before he filled him with the darkness.”
“Blake did that to his own son?” I shuddered.
“Does anything Blake does surprise you? He is the one who poisoned you.”
“But something about this makes no sense.”
“What part? Blake being evil or Gregor being pure darkness?”
“Neither. It’s the whole ‘if I die he dies’ thing.”
“I already told you the darkness will die out without you. You are going to have to trust me on everything else. It is like your bond with James. Some things cannot be seen.” She crossed her legs. “What is your decision, Ainsley?”
“My decision? How can I make a decision before you tell me the truth? None of this makes sense.”
“What else do you need explained? I thought I was being perfectly clear.” She yawned.
“Why is Charlotte the only one who can break the bond? Aren’t you supposed to be all powerful?”
Arabella frowned. “It is one of the few things I can’t do. Besides, this must be done on the true timeline.”
“The true timeline being the one with the soldiers marching toward us?”
“Yes.” She nodded.
“So?” I wished she would just spell it out already.
“I will accompany you. When we return to the true timeline you offer Charlotte the flower, have her break the bond, and I can take care of the rest.”
“Take care of the rest, meaning kill me?”
“I prefer to think of it as helping you sacrifice yourself.”
“Is it easier for you that way?” I didn’t hide my bitterness. I was getting ready to die. Die. Not a temporary solution, but death.
“Would you rather stand back and watch everything you care about destroyed?”
“Me? You’d be the one standing back. You are the one with the power.”
Arabella laughed. “You have power, honey. You have more power than you realize.”
“Yet you are suggesting a suicide mission.”
“I said sacrifice—“
“But it’s death. We both know that.”
She shrugged. “You never know. Not all deaths are forever…”
“Wait. What do you mean?” I tiny glimmer of hope flashed before me.
“Are you thinking time travel? Like Elron could go back and somehow save me?”
Arabella shrugged again. “In the end the only one who can save you is yourself.”
“Stop it!” I ran out of patience. “How can I save myself if I’m dead?”
“I already told you, you have power. Use it.”
“Use it how? Use it when?”
“That is for you to figure out. I can’t do it all for you, can I?”
19
James
I was close to going in after her. Whether I was granted an audience with the Elders or not, no one could keep me from Ainsley if she was in trouble.
I had managed to stay calm when Elron was around, but not long after he left I started getting restless. Was I really going to stand around and wait if she was in danger? Would I ever be able to live with myself? I promised her over and over I would protect her. Protecting her did not involve sitting back and letting her handle crazy situations on her own. To top it off Elron was fighting my fight with Gregor. I felt useless and weak. Neither was a good feeling.
I knew the darkness was there. It was impossible to ignore, but that did not mean it was impossible to fight. I could control it.
I was about to head into the clouds to find Ainsley when she appeared through the mist. My heart soared the moment she came into view.
She wore a troubled expression—which had me on alert—but she was back. She had survived her meeting with the Elders, and that alone gave me the strength to push away the anger. The anger was not mine, yet it pressed upon my soul like an unimaginable weight.
I ran toward her, eagerly pulling her into my arms. She relaxed against me and started to cry, cry in a way I had not heard her do before.
I held her tightly as guilt racked through me. She was crying because I had left her to face the Elders alone. I had failed her, and I would have to spend the rest of my life making up for that. "Ainsley? Are you all right?"
She grabbed a fistful of my shirt, and the bawling lessened into light sobs.
"Ainsley?" I asked trying to keep my voice soft.
"I'm fine." She released my shirt. "Sorry."
"Why are you apologizing?"
"For crying. I don’t even know why I’m doing it."
"Please never apologize for crying." She never had to apologize for anything, let alone showing me her true feelings.
"I'm fine." She stepped back, but I still held her in my arms.
"You already said that." I smiled at her, relieved she seemed to be feeling better.
“Thank you for waiting for me.”
I laughed as relief and surprise flooded me. “Of course I waited. Although I admit I did come close to following after.”
“It is a good thing you chose not to follow.” A blonde walked out of the clouds. She was wearing a short dress and high heels and looked completely out of place on the mountaintop.
“Who are you?” I already knew she could be far more than she appeared.
She grinned as she walked closer. “I am Arabella, but all you really need to know is I am the Elder who was most willing to hear Ainsley out.”
I stared at her. “An Elder?”
“I know. I know. I look far too young to be one, but looks can be deceiving.” She smiled, revealing two rows of perfectly white teeth.
“Absolutely.” I composed myself. “And what did you do to my Ainsley?”
“What did I do to her?” Arabella laughed. “You mean how have I offered to help her?”
“She was hysterically crying when she arrived here. You did something.” Ainsley said she did not know why she was crying, but there had to be a reason. We had been through so much already, and she had never cried like that.
“She is going to help.” Ainsley dried her eyes. “She is here to help.”
There was something in Ainsley’s words that put me on guard. I wanted to trust her, but I could not fully. She was hiding something from me.
“What kind of help are you willing to give?” I eyed Arabella warily.
Arabella opened her hand revealing a bright blue flower on a dark green, almost black stem. “I have this.”
“That is the flower that Charlotte seeks?” I had only heard of her desire for it from Ainsley. How desperate was Charlotte to get it that she would lie to Liam? I would have found it hard to believe except I knew Charlotte would do anything to achieve her goals. She had always been strong-willed, but that personality trait was only stronger now.
“Yes. The flower of eon. They are very rare. In fact this is the only one that will bloom for another twenty-years.” Arabella closed her hand around the flower, and it disappeared.
“Then why are you here? Why not give Ainsley the flower?” Something was wrong. There was far more going on than either of them were admitting. I refused to be left in the dark when we were talking about Ainsley’s safety.
“I am here to make sure you get to where you need to be.” Arabella ran a hand through her long blond hair.
“No.” I shook my head. “I saw Ainsley’s tears. There is more.”
“James.” Ainsley squeezed my hand. “Sto
p. There is nothing you need to know.”
“What price did you ask?” I looked at the Elder. “Whatever price she agreed to, I will pay.”
“That is not how things work.” Arabella put a hand under my chin.
I stepped back.
She dropped her hand. “A debt is not transferable.”
“He is paying it anyway,” Ainsley mumbled.
“What do you mean?” I turned Ainsley so she was looking right at me. “What are you speaking of?”
“And it may seem high to you, but you will still have life and you will find happiness.” A few tears streamed down her face again.
“Happiness? I already have that with you.” I took her hands in mine.
“But you could have it without me too.” She looked down.
The cold reality of what was really going on hit me. “The price is your life?”
“No.” Ainsley shook her head as tears fell from her eyes. “The price is our bond.”
“The kindred bond?”
She looked down. “Please, James. This is the right decision. You have to trust me.”
“Trust you?” I gaped at her. “Are you really speaking of giving up our kindred bond?” The thought of it made me ill.
“Yes, and maybe it’s a good thing.” Ainsley lowered her eyes. “Maybe that’s the problem. Maybe our bond has skewed everything, and we’d be better off without it.”
“Better off without the kindred bond?” I repeated the words, still failing to grasp how she could think losing the bond could be a good thing.
“How could you ask for that?” I glared at Arabella. “Of all things? How can you ask for something that was a gift from the Source? That is not something that can even be taken.” I spent most of my life trying to defy the Source. I cursed it, I fought against it, but in the end it gave me the greatest gift ever, Ainsley. Now I was supposed to give it back?
“It can be taken by one person.” Arabella cocked her head to the side. “She can take anything with the right tools.”
“Charlotte!” The realization hit me hard. My closest friend would take my greatest gift? “Why?”
Forged in Light (The Forged Chronicles Book 4) Page 13