“That’s it, precious. I want to feel you come on my cock.” The instant I fall to pieces, his lips crash into mine and he falls apart all around me. Inside of me. “Fuck... ” he cries out as his body shudders against mine. My heart aches when his lips press against the base of my throat. And his beard tickles as he nuzzles into my neck. We linger for a while as our breathing slows. Neither one of us wants to be the first to let go. “Lyra, I’m sorry... ”
Rage erupts inside of me at his pathetic attempt at an apology. “No, Ryker. Don’t you dare apologize! I know you want me just as much as I want you, so don’t!” I break. I can’t hold it back any longer. All the tears I’ve been pushing down for so long come to the surface and tumble down my cheeks. Drowning me in their intensity until I can no longer breathe. And when his lips capture all of my tears, I shatter.
“Just breathe, precious. I’m right here.” Oh, my god. If he only knew I don’t ever want to let him go. “Breathe, baby,” he whispers before his lips meet mine. ‘Baby’? God, I feel like my heart is about to burst with love. And when I feel him thicken inside of me, I’m complete. His hands immediately frame my face as he gazes down at me. “What? Did you think once was enough?” When I bite my bottom lip and shake my head, he says, “Good. Because it’s your turn, precious.” He rolls us over while he’s still inside of me. When he positions my legs so I’m straddling him, I begin riding him while he guides me. “Yeah, just like that, precious.”
Chapter Fifteen
Ryker
The taste of her still lingers on my lips. While her scent clings to my body like a second skin, seeping into my every pore. Devouring me. God, I am so fucked!
I step under the piping hot water and begin washing off all traces of her. Not that it really matters, because she’s already embedded deep beneath my skin. Last night I broke every single rule I’ve ever made, but Lyra was so worth it.
I let my mind wander as the water soothes my weary bones. And I’m not surprised when I remember the quotes Bella had written down so long ago. “Dry thine eyes, too; ‘tis vain to keep this causeless grief for years.” It’s from a poem by Emily Bronte called Encouragement. Since my job was so dangerous, Bella and I often talked about death. We both agreed that we’d move on if something happened to either one of us. I didn’t tell her that I had all my fingers and toes crossed at the time. God, I never thought in a million years that I’d be the one left standing. Bell’s love was so pure and unconditional that I wanted her to share that love with someone, even if it couldn’t be me.
Now it’s my turn to walk away from Lyra. So she can live the life she was meant to before meeting me. Besides, even if I wanted to be with her, I’m sure it’s too late to stop what Cole has already started. For the first time in a long time, I can’t breathe. And then Lyra wraps me up in her arms and for the first time in a long time, I feel like I can take a heartfelt breath. Albeit, short-lived.
“Morning,” she whispers, as her lips press to the curve of my back.
I was so lost in my own thoughts, I never heard her enter the shower. Dammit! Now I know what I have to do and it’s going to kill me. But it’s necessary. “Morning, precious,” I murmur without an ounce of emotion. And when I remove her arms from around my waist, my heart breaks. “Lyra, have you forgotten? Today starts a new day, which means you have to abide by the rules.”
When I hear her choke back a sob, I want to fall to my knees. But instead, I quickly turn around and grab her wrists. I want her to hate me so when she has to leave it won’t hurt so much. “Unless, you want me to fuck you from behind against the shower wall.” I cock my head to the side and give her my most menacing stare. When inside I’m dying a slow death as I watch her tears tumble down her flushed cheeks.
“No, Ryker. In fact, I don’t want you to ever touch me again!” She yanks free from my hold. I have to stop myself from going after her as I watch her stumble out of the shower. I convince myself it’s for her own good. But is it really? Yeah, it is. Because my life will never be my own and that’s not the kind of life I want for her. So, I rest my palms and my weary head against the wet tile and pray for the water to wash away my countless sins.
I spend the remainder of the day hidden in my office like a coward. Only coming out long enough to use the bathroom and check up on her. From what I can see, Lyra and Cody have been in the library with the door closed all day. She’s probably been planning my murder, and I wouldn’t blame her. Because I giveth and I taketh away… That’s just who I am.
I contemplate sleeping in here on the couch, but I decide against it. We’re bound to run into each other sooner or later. So why not meet in bed where it all began?
I notice the library door is open as I walk into the kitchen to get something to drink. I’d like to snatch what’s left of the whiskey, but since that was the cause of all this angst, I leave it on the counter and grab a bottle of water instead. After finishing up in the bathroom, I head upstairs. Lyra’s curled up under the covers with Cody lying on the floor beside her. “Turncoat,” I mumble. And I have to chuckle when she lets out a half-whine-half-yawn kind-of-thing before resting her chin on her paws.
Somewhere in the middle of the night we’ve became a tangled mess of arms and legs. And wouldn’t you know, my morning hard-on is pressed against her hand which is tucked between us. Fuck! This is so not good. If I move, she might let go or she could squeeze harder. Shit! What to do, what to do? My wicked side says to go for it but after everything that’s happened I can’t touch her. Ever again. But if I piss her off, she’ll hate me all the more.
Placing my hand over hers, I begin rubbing. And damn if I don’t get harder and harder with each fucking stroke. When her eyes open-wide I get in her face and say, “That’s it, precious. Make me come in your hand.” Technically, I’ll come in my boxers but I think she gets the gist.
Lyra suddenly has my undivided attention when her hand connects with my jaw.
“Rub one out yourself, Ryker. Or better yet, go into town and fuck Sonia. I’m sure she’s been wondering where the hell you’ve been.” Flinging off the covers, she storms down the stairs with Cody close behind. Wow! It looks like I’ve lost both of my girls in just twenty-four hours. Way to go, asshole. Well, it’s what I set out to do. So, mission accomplished.
The tantalizing aroma of coffee has me throwing on a pair of my pajama bottoms and heading downstairs. She looks miserable all curled up on the couch. Her hands wrapped around a steaming mug of coffee. Pouty, but adorable. Lyra must have let Cody out because she’s nowhere to be found. So I throw in a pod to brew and patiently wait, stealing a glance in her direction. I catch her ogling me when she thought my back was turned. Now her cheeks are a pretty shade of pink. Suppressing a smile, I rub my jaw where her hand connected with it. God, for a tiny little thing she sure packs a hell of a punch. Once my coffee is finished, I pull up a stool and sit down at the island. Until Cody begins barking and all the hair on my body stands at attention. Someone’s coming and she’s trying to warn me.
Lyra
“Lyra, go upstairs. Now!” Ryker screams. He grabs something out of the cabinet, and it takes a minute for me to process what he’s holding. It’s a goddamn gun! In a flash he’s grabbing me by the arm and dragging me down the hallway. “You’ll be safer in my office. Go, go!” Everything’s happening so fast I don’t have time to think. And seconds later all I can hear is shouting from the other side of the door.
The voices are very loud but muffled. So, it’s safe to assume Ryker’s office has to be soundproofed to some degree. I hate not knowing who’s on the other side or what’s happening for that matter. A sudden thought has me spiraling out of control. Is someone here to take me home? And if so, why does that make me so sad? My conscious gladly answers the question for me: because you’ve fallen in love with him, you idiot! And the thought of never seeing him again is too heartrending for me to comprehend.
Oh god, what have I done?
I’m on the verge of a breakdown wh
en the door suddenly opens. Ryker looks torn as he stands on the other side with his hand beckoning me. “It’s safe, Lyra. You can come out now.” He looks agitated when he combs his fingers through his hair and gives me a sideways glance. My body shudders when I step out of the room but instantly warms when he places his hand at the small of my back. He’s giving me the strength I need to accept what’s on the other side.
I recognize Cole immediately, but the two other men are strangers. “I’d like to apologize for what appears to be an unexpected visit. However, I did notify Ryker we’d be coming out today. Apparently he failed to check his messages.” He glares at Ryker, whose jaw clenches. “Lyra, why don’t you have a seat while Ryker gets dressed?”
When Ryker takes a few menacing strides towards Cole, the two men advance. Cole’s arms stretch wide as he stops them from taking another step. “Remember, I’m one of the good guys, just like you, Ryker. Let’s not make this any harder than it needs to be.” He says it with such conviction that I almost believe him. Almost.
“Fine! Just don’t start without me.” I’m unsettled, when he hurries up the stairs, taking two at a time.
“Please, make yourself comfortable. I’m sure it won’t take him but a minute,” Cole explains. A small smile plays on his lips when I finally sit on the edge of the sofa. Ready to run? Maybe. “My mistake. It was less than a minute.” I inhale sharply when Ryker sits down on the arm of the sofa, surrounding me with his warmth. And when his hand lands on the nape of my neck, I’m grateful he’s ignoring my request not to be touched. Cole, on the other hand, doesn’t look too pleased with Ryker’s possessiveness.
“Personally, I have a few concerns about sending Lyra home...”
“Cole, you gave me your fucking word... ”
“Ryker, would you like my men to escort you outside while I talk to Lyra alone?” Every muscle in his body constricts, preparing for an attack. When I gently squeeze his knee, it doesn’t go unnoticed. Cole shakes his head before continuing, “No? I didn’t think so. Let me explain what my concerns are and we’ll go from there. The man who is sitting behind you is Jonathan Day, not Ryker Steel. And I don’t think for one minute you truly realize how crucial it is for you to know the difference between the two. One is a figment of our imagination, and the other is sitting behind you. Ryker has pissed off quite a few people by going off the grid. So, it’s a matter of life and death, Lyra. His! And no matter how much he doesn’t give two-shits-to-the-wind about what happens to him, I do!”
“I wouldn’t do anything that would put him in danger, I swear...”
Cole throws his hands up in surrender. “Not intentionally, of that I’m sure. Look, you need to be debriefed before I can even think about sending you home. This is how it’s going to go down. We will take you to a safe house where I will personally go over everything with you. Only when I’m absolutely positive you’re on board will I consider sending you back to your family.”
“Over my dead body! That was not what I agreed to, Cole, and you know it!” In an instant, Ryker has Cole pinned up against the wall and the goons are having a hell of a time trying to pry him off of him.
“Stop it! I’ll do whatever you need me to do!” I scream. Once I push past the two thugs, I hear Ryker whisper to Cole, “That was not part of our deal.” What the hell is that supposed to mean? What deal?
“Lyra, go pack your things. You’re leaving with us today,” Cole states. He smooths over the suit that Ryker just messed up.
“Goddammit, Cole! We’ve always had each other’s backs. Please, don’t let me down. Or I swear I will hunt you down.”
“You and me. Outside. Now!” Cole motions for Ryker to follow him as they both go storming out the door. I’m very uncomfortable sitting alone with the two goons, so I nonchalantly walk to the window and peek out. There’s a lot of screaming, and hands flying around. No fists, just hands. Both of them trying to get their points across. Cole seems to be the first one to back off, with his head tucked into his chin. My heart’s thumping when Ryker places his hand on the back of Cole’s neck and pulls him in for a hug. The actual embrace itself doesn’t last long before it turns into a one-arm bro-hug. If you blinked, you probably would have missed the whole thing. Cole nods once before they head back towards the cabin. Quickly, I run into the kitchen to get a drink.
I’m certain that the both of them can hear my heart hammering the moment they step inside. I have no idea what conclusion they’ve agreed to but they both look devastated. And when Ryker’s gaze locks on mine, I know it was his decision and not Cole’s. By his furrowed brow, the set of his jaw and the creases around his eyes. We’ve only known each other for a short time, but I know for a fact that’s the look of a man in control.
“Ryker seems to think you’ll need more time to acclimate. So, against my better judgement, I’ll be back to pick you up in a week. Is that acceptable, Lyra?”
I’m trembling uncontrollably as I nod. “Yes, t-that’s fine.”
“Good. Then we’ll see you.” Ryker’s intense gaze never wavers, long after the door closes behind them.
Chapter Sixteen
Ryker
Last night, she made it very clear I wasn’t to touch her. Ever again. Now I’m wondering if she’s changed her mind. Lyra’s held my gaze since Cole told her she’s leaving in a week. Could she be committing me to memory much in the way I’m memorizing her? I’d like to think so. I’m hoping against hope that she’d like to remember our little fragment of time. I know I certainly will. Lyra’s the only woman who’s ever managed to tap into emotions I thought I had buried along with my wife. Although our ending will be bittersweet, I wouldn’t have changed a thing.
In a few short strides I’m in her personal space. I’m devastated when the palm of her hands push against my chest. Stopping me. “I can’t do this, Ryker. I’m sorry.”
Her rejection hurts, but I will not show it. “Don’t apologize, precious. I’ll call Cole immediately to see if he can swing by to pick you up.”
“No! You don’t understand! I don’t want to leave. I want to stay with you, Ryker. Please, let me stay.” Lyra’s emotional, so she hasn’t a clue what she’s really asking of me. I can’t give her what she so deserves.
When I fold her in my arms, she doesn’t resist. Instead, she pulls me in closer as she shatters. “Oh, precious.” I thought I had warned her about falling for me. I nuzzle into her as I whisper, “I won’t let you stay here with me because I destroy everything I touch. Besides, Cole has already spoken to your family and they’re anticipating your return. Imagine how devastated they would be if they were told it was a false alarm. Do you really want to put them through that kind of pain again?”
“No, but I can’t fathom the thought of never seeing you again.” I’m at a loss for words because she’s just verbalized what I cannot.
My chest tightens as I whisper, “We still have a week, Lyra. So let’s not waste another precious second. Tell me what you want and it’s yours.” Holding my breath, I wait for her answer.
“You. I want you, Ryker... ” I don’t wait for her to finish. I claim her mouth with mine. Even if I wanted to stop the outpouring of love and passion that bleeds from my heart and soul, I couldn’t. It consumes me to the point where I feel like I might implode if I stop. So I don’t. I take and take until I’ve stripped her bare, exposing her all to me.
We don’t speak as I carry her up the stairs and gently lay her down on my bed. Her eyes never leave mine as I remove my clothes and place myself between her trembling thighs. With all of my weight on my elbows I thread our hands together and place one of them against my chest. “You’re the reason why my heart is pounding, Lyra. And do you know why?” When she worries her bottom lip and shakes her head, I continue. “You... Make... Me... Feel... Something I haven’t been capable of in years. So thank you for giving me these last three months, precious.” I taste the salt of her tears on my lips as I slip inside her tight, wet heat. For the first time in a long time, I get
lost in a woman. This woman. The only one who’s been able to turn my black and white world into blindingly vibrant colors!
“I’m going to devour you, precious. Watch me.” She whimpers as I quickly pull out of her, but soon moans as my mouth latches on to her nipple. I tease those sensitive peaks with my tongue and my teeth until she’s a writhing mess beneath me. All the while, my beard scratches and tickles her tender flesh.
Her hands tangle in my hair as I lick and nip the swell of each breast. Making sure to avoid those pretty pink-tips that are begging for my attention. “Ryker, please. I need you inside me.”
“First, I’m going to taste every inch of you, precious. Then you can have my cock.” My mouth leaves a trail of kisses along her ribs, her taut stomach and her slender waist before I start from the tips of her toes and work my way up her inner thighs. When I push her knees up into her chest and see her puckered little opening glistening with arousal, I aggressively growl. Then with a few quick swipes of my tongue, I lap up all the sweet goodness her excitement has surrendered to me. She tastes like passion, desire and paradise all rolled into one. My precious.
Her half-hooded eyes search mine as I climb off the bed and drag her to the edge by her ankles. “Ryker?” she asks, as I kneel on the floor and position her legs over my shoulders. As soon as I bury my face between her thighs, I can feel her heels press against my shoulders. Urging me on.
I allow my tongue to ravish every part of her aching pussy, except the one area she desperately craves. And I try not to smile when she huffs out a breath in exasperation. “What do you want, precious?” I breathe across her swollen folds.
“Lick my clit, Ryker. Please!” She bucks against my face as I pull her into my greedy mouth. Sucking and nipping on the sensitive bud until her orgasm takes her over the edge. And as soon as her body stops shuddering from her climax, I stand up and thrust inside of her still quaking pussy. There’s plenty of time to make love to her later, but right now I need a quick release.
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