by Tiya Rayne
I grabbed my purse off the chair beside me and went to stand the same time Jackson got to his feet.
“I don’t have exes. Remember, I don’t have relationships.”
“Ok! Then is he one of your fuck toys?”
At this, I laughed. I loved the little jealousy I detected in his voice. I’ve never been into jealous lovers, but something about Jackson being a little jealous had me turned on.
“Why, is that a problem for you?” I asked as he walked me out to my car.
He chuckled. “I’m a confident man, Charlice. I’m not easily intimidated by some guy that fucked my girl.”
“Your girl?” I questioned, hiding the fact that I kind of liked that coming from his lips.
Another one of those confident smirks from Jackson. “What’s that saying, ask and you shall receive? Well, I’m claiming what’s going to be mine. What you did before we met has nothing to do with me, I’m only concerned with what happens after.”
I crossed my arms over my chest. Despite how hard I tried, the smile I was fighting refused to give up its spot on my face.
“And what happens after?”
Jackson took my hand and rubbed his roughened thumb against the smooth skin on the back of my hand. I couldn’t help but think about the fact that he was rubbing his thumb in the exact way he would rub my clit.
“What are you doing this weekend?”
I blushed. Damn him, I blushed like a weak little girl.
“Baby sitting, but I thought we were keeping things friendly? Shouldn’t this be our goodbye?”
That’s right, Duck, cut this off now. You have no need to see him again.
He took a step closer, towering over me. His large body didn’t intimidate me as I looked up into those hooded hazel eyes. I loved the way he smelled, like man and sawdust. An odd combination, but it worked on him. He smelled like a man.
“I’m asking as a friend,” his deep voice admitted.
“Do you always ask your friends out on the weekend?” I cocked an eyebrow up at him.
He smiled that panty melting smile. “Only the really attractive ones.” There goes that damn tongue rolling over that plump bottom lip again. “Besides, it’s clear you have no problems with friends.” He smirked, hinting back to Sean.
I laughed and rolled my eyes.
“I thought you understood, Mr. Keller. I don’t date.” Even I could hear how weak that argument was.
“And as I said, Ms. Jeffries, this isn’t a date. Just two friends hanging out. Just like today.”
I looked away from those stunning eyes, giving myself time to at least look as if I was holding out. When I turned back to Jackson, he had the biggest grin on his face. He knew I was going to cave.
“When?” I simply asked with a playful eye roll.
“Next Saturday at nine a.m. I’ll pick you up from home. Wear something comfortable,” he stated before letting go of my hand. I felt the absence of his touch immediately.
“Who the hell goes on a date at nine o’clock in the morning?” I demanded with my hands on my hips as Jackson backed away from me with a sly smile.
“Remember, it’s not a date.” He winked. “Text me your address before then.” And then, he jogged back to his dirty truck before I could argue anymore.
That damn white boy.
EIGHT
Two days before my not—a—date with Jackson, I was speeding into my Grams’ driveway. Just fifteen minutes ago, I got an urgent message from her telling me to come home immediately. I was in the middle of a meeting with a potential client when my assistant delivered the message. I quickly apologized and had my assistant take over the meeting.
I was already on edge because of Cliff’s crazy ass. Last week after the coffee date with Jackson, I got a message from a private number. It was a picture of Jackson holding my hand, right before he asked me out this weekend. The picture captured everything. I could tell in Jackson’s eyes that he wanted me, not just to fuck, that was evident too, but he wanted me. The woman with major attitude issues. Looking at me in the picture made a few things obvious too, I may want Jackson a little more than I let on.
Although the picture was creepy enough, the text that went along with it was worse. “I’ll never share you.” Who the fuck does something like that? I’ve been a little paranoid ever since. I’m not too worried though, I can still handle Cliff.
My biggest fear as I broke the speed limit to get to my grandma’s house was my Papa. A year and a half ago, Papa had a massive heart attack that scared us shitless. He’d been taking it easy and managing his diet ever since, but as I made the twenty-minute drive to my grandma’s house in a record breaking ten, I couldn’t help but think the worst.
I parked my car in the driveway and ran as fast as my Louboutins would take me. I used my key to rush in the house and immediately started calling Grams’ name.
“Grams! Grams!”
“In here, Duck.” Her voice called back from the kitchen.
She didn’t sound in pain or sad, but that didn’t mean anything. I rushed into the kitchen to find her standing at the stove humming a tune. She was stirring something in a pot. I looked around the room to make sure I wasn’t missing anything. My heart still kicked up in my chest. Everything seemed in place. Kareem, Keisha’s three-year-old son was sitting in his high chair at the island.
“Um, Grams, is everything ok?” She turned towards me with a smile.
“Of course. Go on and sit down so I can fix you a plate.”
Without thinking, I did as she instructed. My brain still stunned by the urgency of her earlier phone call.
Grams placed a plate of spaghetti, homemade rolls, and sweet carrots down in front of me, and a smaller plate in front of Kareem. I looked to Kareem who smiled at me before digging into his food.
“Why did you call me?”
Sadie Jefferies wiped her hands on her apron before leaning against her sink to stare back at me.
“So, what’s this I hear about you dating a white boy?”
Gotdamn Keisha! That bitch can’t keep nothing closed, not her legs or her mouth. I had no intentions of telling my family about Jackson.
“I’m not dating anyone, and why would you call me over here like something was wrong? I thought something happened to Papa.”
“This is an emergency. I had to talk to you before you did something foolish, like run that boy off. Now, I don’t know why you couldn’t come to me about this white boy. You know your Papa and I don’t care who any of y’all date, as long as they treat you right. Does he treat you right?”
My mouth was still hanging open. Too much was going on at once. She called me out of an important meeting to talk to me about Jackson, and now she’s wondering if he treats me right.
“Grams, you’ve been misinformed, Jackson and I…”
“Jackson? That’s his name? Who his people? I wonder do he know them Parker people that own Parker Furniture store.”
I took a breath, this was why I didn’t tell my family anything.
“You wouldn’t know his people, Grams. And not all white people are related.”
“You don’t know who I know. What’s his last name?”
“Anonymous,” I said, then pushed my plate of untouched food away as I climbed to my feet.
I walked over to the pantry where Grams keeps her aluminum foil. Now that I knew this wasn’t an emergency, I was going to take my food and head back to work.
“When are you going to bring him to Sunday dinner?”
“Never. I told you, I’m not dating anyone.” I found the aluminum foil amongst the wax paper, cupcake holders, Ziploc bags, and plastic wrap.
“What happened to you that has you so scared to fall in love?” My body froze momentarily at her question.
I turned back to my grandma with a practiced smile.
“Nothing happened.”
“I think you’re scared you’re going to end up like your mother. Always searching for love in the next man.”
Grams could deny it all she wanted, the only thing my mother was looking for was a man to take care of her, she could give a shit if he loved her or not. Bernita Jefferies had no idea what love was.
“Look, Grams, I don’t do relationships because I don’t believe in love. It has nothing to do with Bernita.”
She looked at me and gave me one of those smiles. The one she used to give me when I was a little girl and hurt myself, but I would try not to cry in front of Papa and Eli. That same sad knowing smile spread across her full face.
“Sometimes I look at you and I think you’re a grown woman, then you say things, and I remember you’re still a child. You have a world of secrets hidden behind your eyes, Duck. No need to deny it,” she said, cutting off what was surely about to be my denial.
“A mother knows her children. It doesn’t matter if she’s your own or your grandchild. I see it in your eyes. You can’t lie to me.”
Even though everything on my body stiffened at her words, I placed a smile on my face.
“There is nothing to hide, Sadie Rose.” I wrapped my plate up in the aluminum foil I found.
“Mhhmmm,” Grams said. “So, nothing happened up at your house last week?”
Jesus! Can none of my family keep a damn secret?
I didn’t care how rattled that last picture and message made me, I wasn’t going to tell her about it. I would never allow my problems to become hers.
“It’s not a big issue. The situation was handled.”
“Duck, I have told you about that fast-tailed lifestyle you live. It’s going to catch up to you. Men can become scorned lovers too. I don’t want to see you get hurt, baby.” Grams placed a hand on my cheek.
I turned and placed a kiss on her withered palm and then backed away.
“I’ll stay safe. Now, can I please go back to work so I can try to salvage this meeting I almost ruined?” I laughed.
I could tell that my reply wasn’t suitable for my grandmother, but she knew there was no getting through to me. She placed a kiss on my forehead.
“Go on. I’m expecting to see Mr. Jackson ‘No last name’ at Sunday dinner this week.”
I didn’t reply. There was no need. Sadie would never meet Jackson because we weren’t dating. I placed a kiss on little Kareem’s head and walked out the door.
****
The day of the not-a-date, my nerves were all over the place. Just that morning, I had to call the police to the house again. That fucker came to the house beating on my door again. He begged me to let him in and help him. He ran off right before the cops came. I called Sean too. He showed up raging mad before the police came. He couldn’t believe that the cops had yet to catch Cliff. I thought the same thing.
Cliff wasn’t the brightest bulb in the box. There was no way he could evade the cops this long. I told them to check with the girlfriend after that first time he showed up at the house, but she told the cops she hadn’t seen him since she turned him away that morning. Seemed like all the women in Cliff’s life was giving him the boot.
I hated these sick games Cliff was playing, but I refused to let him keep me held up in my house. No man would have that type of power over me. I made sure to keep a piece with me at all times. I even told Sean about my weapons. He took his time looking them all over to make sure they were properly working. He told me if Cliff showed up again to put a bullet right in between his eyes, and then call him. I promised him I would.
Sean hated to leave, but he had plans that night with Rochelle. I figured he was going to pop the question soon. She’d been begging him for it. Even though I’d hate to lose that dick permanently, I wasn’t selfish, and I wanted Sean happy. So if that moody bitch made him happy, then what could I say?
By the time eight-forty-five rolled around, I had changed clothes three times. Jackson said dress comfortable, but comfortable could mean anything. I ended up with a pair of 7 For All Mankind distressed skinny-jeans, a BeBe one shoulder silk top, and my Chanel sandals.
My doorbell rang at exactly eight-fifty. I already knew who it was because the security at the front gate notified me of his arrival. I opened the door to a smiling Jackson. He looked sexy as hell with the sun shining through his hair. His golden skin glistened underneath his black UnderArmour t-shirt and baller shorts.
“Why the hell are you dressed like you’re going to the gym?”
A smile from Jackson. “Are you going to invite me in before criticizing what I’m wearing?”
I rolled my eyes and opened my door wider before stepping back to give him access.
His eyes scanned the interior of my house, taking in the open floor plan, hard wood floors, tray ceilings and floor to ceiling glass windows. “Nice, but your front yard could use some flowers.” He gave me that playful smirk.
I made sure I had a company that came over to cut my grass and keep my grass green, but that was all that went into my yard. With the exception of a few shrubs that lined the short walk way to the front door, I didn’t have any flowers.
“Are you here for a job or a date?” I teased Jackson.
“So this is a date?”
I quickly shook my head! Damn, I fell into that trap.
“No, not a date. Just two new friends hanging out….. at a gym apparently. Or a frat party,” I said, looking down at his outfit.
He laughed. “Just go get changed. You’ll like where I’m taking you.”
I doubted it. However, I didn’t argue, I just went and changed into a pair of yoga pants and old Emory university tee with my Nike running shoes. I was telling myself to give this a chance. If it turned out to be a huge bust, I could finally write Jackson off and be over this little infatuation I had with him. When I came back down the stairs and walked into my living room, Jackson’s eyes grew large. He took in my tight fit yoga pants, and his mouth dropped open. My last outfit cost a total of eighteen-thousand dollars, and his mouth fell open for a thirty-dollar pair of Yoga pants? Why the hell did that turn me on?
“Are we going to go, or are we finally going to do this thing my way?” I teased as I spun around and showed him my ass.
Part of me wished we could just bypass all this date stuff and fuck already, but another NEW part of me kind of wanted to see how this date went.
Jackson cleared his throat and stood to his feet. I almost choked on what was being barely contained behind those shorts. Forget this damn date, I wanted the pole in his shorts.
“Point me to the restroom, and then we can go.”
I didn’t even attempt to take my eyes away from what his hand was trying to block. I just threw up my hand and pointed to the hall bath. Jackson escaped around the corner and out of sight.
Damn! Jackson was packing. I practiced a few Kegel exercises to calm the ache in my clit. I hoped we could make it through this not-a-date without yanking each other’s clothes off.
By the time Jackson appeared back in the living room, he seemed to have charmed his snake into behaving.
“You ready?” he asked, those hazel eyes staring back at me.
I nodded, and he led us out the door. I locked up and followed him to his truck.
“Do you ever wash this thing?” I asked jokingly as he opened my door.
“Why would I? I think the dirt on a vehicle tells its story.”
“The only story this thing is telling is that it’s neglected.”
Jackson laughed as he closed my door. In spite of the truck being a dirty mess on the outside, it was spotless on the inside. Not even a piece of paper in the cup holder. And the bonus, it smelled just like Jackson.
I was startled when a black wet nose landed on my shoulder. I forgot about the dog. He brought another female on our date? I turned to face the dog. I wasn’t a pet person. I didn’t have anything against them, but I don’t understand the passion in cleaning up behind an animal that doesn’t even appreciate you. It’s like marriage without the added bonus of
sex. The dog stared at me, her brown eyes seemed to take me in. If I didn’t know any better, I would think she was really trying to size me up. See if I was worthy of her human.
“This isn’t a date, and I’m not trying to take your place.” I found myself saying to the dog.
She continued to look at me, then tilted her head to the side as if she didn’t believe me. When Jackson opened the door on his side, we both turned to see him, me with a smile and her with a happy wag of her tail. He rubbed her head then sat in his seat.
“You girls get to know each other?” he asked.
The dog turned to me one last time then turned around on the back seat to lay down.
“She likes you. That’s a good thing. Lady is usually very possessive of me.”
“And you thought to stick me in the truck alone with a vicious dog that gets jealous of females around her man?”
He laughed. “She’s not vicious.”
“That’s what all dog owners say until they are on the news trying to explain why Spot chewed the neighbor’s kid’s face off.”
A shake of his head. “Your pessimism is adorable.” He started the engine, then glanced over to me.
“Are you ready?”
“I guess.”
He laughed as he backed out of my driveway.
The moment we pulled onto the highway, Jackson started to talk.
“So, tell me something about you that no one else knows.” He said, glancing over to me.
“My secrets are a very pricey commodity. I don’t just give them away.”
Another chuckle. He took one hand off the steering wheel to rub his thumb along his bottom lip.
“Ok, how about an even trade. I’ll give you a secret of mine, and you can give me one of yours?”
“I won’t make any promises,” I said, looking out the passenger window as the busy Atlantic traffic came to a standstill.
“I’ll take my chances. Let me see……” He paused, running a hand through his hair.
I loved the way his wide arms flexed and the muscles bunched whenever he moved his hands.
“Ok, I got one. My dad had this big shed behind our house. He kept all of his tools and things in it. Well, when I was about thirteen, I picked up the nasty habit of smoking. One day after school, I was dying for a smoke, so I went into the shed and fired one up. I thought I heard someone coming, so I quickly tossed the cigarette to the floor and walked out of the shed. I had planned to go back and get it, because hey, they were hard to come by at that age. Two hours later, the entire shed was burning to the ground. I’d completely gotten sidetracked and forgot about the cigarette. To this day, my father thinks some neighborhood kid burnt down that shed.”