by Kailin Gow
Chapter 19
Drew
I don’t know what made me go over to Nat’s apartment tonight. I thought maybe I’d catch him before he takes off for Malibu. It’ll give me a chance to talk to him, to ask him how Summer’s doing. We’ve bonded in a way over helping Summer with this cyber-bullying crap she has been going through, and although I should be working on one more assignment to turn in, I drive to Nat’s place, thinking I can at least use his apartment to get some peace. Living with Mom has been stressful these days, especially when she thinks I’m moving to Malibu to get away from her. I’m moving there because I want to be there. So many reasons why, and the most important one of all is because Summer’s there.
My heart clinches with pain when I think about her. Why is Summer at Nat’s? Why is she in San Francisco when she should be in Malibu? Why are they dressed only in their underwear, holding each other like that? My mind wants to disbelieve it, but it’s not naïve like that, especially when it knows too much about what happens between a man and a woman in those circumstances.
So Summer and Nat…
My jealousy is so intense I feel myself wanting to drive back to Nat’s, to pull him aside, and punch him as hard as I can. I don’t care if he’s my brother. I don’t care if he loves Summer, and Summer loves him. He knows that it’s my turn to have my chance with Summer. He’s have plenty of chances. Now it’s mine, and he’s stepped into my territory, cut in line in front of me.
I pull out my phone, ready to call him and chew him out, but I don’t.
Instead, I drive back to our house, a mansion overlooking the San Francisco skyline, and sit in the car, looking out into the inky starlit night. Gosh, I’ve loved Summer for so long, and she’s loved Nat for so long. Did I really have a chance against that?
If she loves Nat as much as I love her, then the answer is “no”.
I want to cry, but I don’t. Instead, I open the door and get out of my car, walk into the garage, pick up one of the boxes I packed to have the movers take in the morning, and bring it inside to my room. I begin unpacking the box, placing things where it used to be. My mind’s not even thinking of the details. What am I unpacking? I don’t know. I don’t care. I’m doing something, something productive, even mindless. What I do know is that I’m calling the movers off. Even though I have gotten into USC on early admissions, I’m not going to move into the Pad.
If Nat and Summer are together, and I see them make love around the place, it would drive me so insane, I’d probably kill myself.
Epilogue
Summer
When Nat nearly makes love to me that night, it’s beyond what I have always imagined. He is the one I’ve imagined losing my virginity to and saving myself for. He is my first kiss, my first crush, and now my almost first time. I never imagined he will also be the one to make me associate deep fulfilling love with bottomless pain.
Although we have passion and love, we also have some major issues before we can become a couple. And that became so clear to me afterwards, when we can’t give up our obligations to find a way to each other.
Then there’s Drew. When he came in the door like that, his face so shocked and hurt, I’ve never felt so bad in my life. I know I’ve wounded him deeply. I just don’t know if I can repair it. I don’t know if I can forget the look on his face…betrayal and pain.
“Drew!” I run after him, my dress completely on by now.
Nat runs out after him, too, but he returns and says, “Drew’s already gone.”
“Where to?” I ask.
“I don’t know,” Nat says, getting his phone. “I’m calling him right now.”
“Do you think he’ll be fine? Should we go after him?” I ask. “I know I should, but I don’t have a way. You’ll have to drive.”
“He’s not picking up,” Nat says. “I know he’s taking it hard, but he should have known.”
“Known what?” I ask. “What are you talking about?”
“That you and me. That we’ve always have these feelings for each other. We’re bound to be together one day.”
I swallow back my tears. “No, he doesn’t know.”
Nat looks at me, and his face falls. “You and him…”
“No, not all the way, but you and I, we’re not together like that, either. We have a few kisses and heavy making out, but…”
“You call what we just did heavy making out? How quickly you dismiss us.”
“No, that’s not it,” I say. “In order to have an ‘us’ we both need to make that commitment, and we haven’t. We haven’t even committed to seeing each other next week. Everything’s physical. Between Drew and I, between you and I. We love each other, but we can’t be together. So, there is no ‘us’ unless we have that commitment.”
“Summer,” Nat says. “I’ll do whatever it takes to have an ‘us’, it’s just I can’t promise next week. I’ll promise a date soon.”
“That’s not enough,” I say. “That’s not what Drew will do. He promises me he’ll always be there for me, to keep me safe. He’s even moving to LA to be there for me and the Academy.” I feel a rush of tears threatening to fall, but I hold back. Drew’s heart isn’t the only one broken just now. It is also mine. My lifelong crush on Nathaniel Donovan, despite how hot he is, and how he’s everything a girl wants, has been shattered. I love Drew. I’m not so sure if I can win back his love.
Nat
It appears that the shit hit the fan. The little brother I have been trying to protect all my life has been hurt by the one person he trusts the most – his own brother.
Like I said, there are demons in our family, and I don’t know how and when it surfaces, but when it does, it seems we hurt the people we love the most…which is another reason why I can’t fully love Summer the way I should, why it may not work out between us or that I may ever truly love somebody.
But when I saw how hurt Drew’s face look as he realized what Summer and I have been doing, it hit me in the guts how I felt when I caught Dad screwing his whore secretary.
Only I’m not married. I don’t have kids or a family like that, and Summer isn’t really in an exclusive committed relationship right now. Still, it hurts like a bitch to be reminded of how much I’ve just hurt my own brother.
And now, knowing a lot more about Mom’s condition from the doctor’s, I’m afraid Drew or I or even Rachel will follow in her footsteps. Mental illness. I’ve read sometimes it hits a person, who is perfectly normal, in their twenties. I’m scared to death I’ll have it, but I’m worried even more for my siblings, especially Drew, who, despite how normal he seems, is beginning to display some symptoms, symptoms that has helped him become a football star and even very popular with women. That’s the secret I didn’t want Drew or Summer to know. That’s why I’ve gone all out for Summer. She can’t get together with Drew. I care about both of them, and I’m supposed to protect Summer, so I’ll have to keep her away from Drew, even if they end up hating me.
But now I’m worried about Drew. Knowing what I know about him, I hope he doesn’t do anything drastic. I pray all the dreams I keep having of Summer, Astor, Me, and Drew never come true.
Summer, Drew, Nat, Rachel, and Astor’s story continues in
Book 2 of the Loving Summer Series and Book 2 of the Donovan Brothers Series
Perfect Summer (Loving Summer Series #2)
March 2013
Secrets of the Fall (Donovan Brothers Book #2)
June 2013
The Truth Behind LOVING SUMMER
After Loving Summer was published, I received many emails asking me if it was based on a true story.
Loving Summer is a compilation of 2 families I knew growing up. Ironically, two families with two gorgeous brothers and a pretty sister.
Both of them were families my family grew close to at the time their mothers were having difficulties. Neither of them knew of each other, but both at different periods in their lives went through similar situations of divorce and being a single mother
raising three kids.
The character I most resembled is Aunt Sookie. Mainly because I have or rather had diabetes like the kind Aunt Sookie had. Complicated and potentially life threatening. For a moment in 2012, I did face a life and death situation with my health, brought on by diabetes.
With the love of my family and the strength from prayers, and a dedicated lifestyle change of healthier living and choices, I was able to get to a point of normalcy, getting to a diagnosis of “Normal”.
Loving Summer is a miracle book, and if it wasn’t for that book and the situation that coincidentally came up in it, I would not have been able to be diagnosed and “cured” of diabetes.
Sometimes writing is a way of growth and journey for an author as well as a point of entertainment for readers. I am humbly and sincerely grateful for the opportunity for Loving Summer and my books to touch you in any way.
Thank you for reading Loving Summer. I hope you enjoyed it.
If you enjoyed it, I appreciate you letting others know. Positive reviews and word-of-mouth is very much appreciated, too.
Feedback, comments, etc! You can reach me at:
[email protected]
FINAL NOTE on FALLING FOR SUMMER
Cyber-bullying
If you see someone or a group of people ganging up on a person or book as a means to attack a person personally, through malicious reviews and blogs, targeting someone repeatedly on Twitter, ganging up on them and encouraging other people to, do not encourage this kind of behavior.
To discourage cyber-bullying, vote abuse on the reviews, and don’t encourage the bully by engaging in conversation with them on the post or on Twitter. This will only flame them and make them attack the victim further.
If you know of anyone being bullied, let them know they are not alone. We as a community can fight bullying by encouraging bystanders and authoritative figures in the victim’s life, to take action.
I wrote the Shy Girls Social Club Handbook about Bullying and Other Meanies to help spread awareness about bullying and what to do about it.
It’s available on Amazon right now. And if you really need a copy or would like me to address a group with a talk on bullying and cyber-bullying, please contact me via:
[email protected]
Weigh in on LOVING SUMMER!
Which Team are You On? Who should Summer End Up With? Weigh in and Help the author decide:
Team Drew
Team Nat
Team Astor
Vote on theEDGEbooks.com’s
Loving Summer Poll
If you enjoyed Loving Summer, you’ll enjoy Saving You Saving Me, too!
Aspiring psychiatrist Samantha Sullivan (Sam) never thought she would fall for the one mysterious guy she has been speaking to over the phone for months, the boy the counselors called Daggers. She wasn't supposed to talk to him outside of their sessions. But as she began to peel the layers of Daggers and learn who he is, the one boy she is supposed to be saving, might just be the one who is saving her. A YA-Mature romance from Kailin Gow with a real life tie-in to a community crisis help site inspired by this book.
OTHER BOOKS FROM KAILIN GOW
The FROST Series
The PULSE Series
Wicked Woods Series
Desire Series
Steampunk Scarlett Series
The Fire Wars Series
Fade Series
Circus of Curiosities
You & Me Trilogy
Never Say Never Series
Alchemists Academy Series
Wordwick Games Series
Phantom Diaries Series
Beautiful Beings Series
Stoker Sisters Series
And More!
VISIT KAILIN’S WEBSITE to learn about new releases, the most awesome contests and parties, what Kailin and friends are doing in the community, workshops and events Kailin will be at and more at:
http://www.KailinGowBooks.com
http://kailingow.wordpress.com
and
on Twitter at: @kailingow
KAILIN GOW’S 18+ Adult Romance Books Newsletter
Are you over 18? Would you like to know more about Kailin’s books for adults and new adults?
Sign up for her newsletter at:
kailingowbook(at)aol(dot)com
Thank you for reading! – Kailin
The Protege
She was the young promising composer in search of a master to teach her and advise her. Serena Singleton was the beautiful up and coming talent brought to the attention of the eccentric, famous, and wildly wealthy Sebastian Sorenson, one of the foremost and most talented composers in Hollywood and in the Academics field. A chance encounter brings them into an arrangement that turns out beyond their expectations and desire, testing their boundaries. Who is the student, the protege, and who is the teacher? Nothing is as it seems in this romantic exotic thriller. For Age 18 and up.
Coming April 2013
Table of Contents
Copyright
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Epilogue
The Truth Behind LOVING SUMMER
FINAL NOTE on FALLING FOR SUMMER
OTHER BOOKS FROM KAILIN GOW
Coming soon The Protege