“I need to fill in forms,” she said, pulling her hand away from his. “I need to see Dad.” When she turned toward the door, Alex stopped her by taking both her hands, holding on hard. “Ivy, please give me a moment. I need to get some things straight with you. I’m so sorry for leaving you the way I did.”
She knew she should play it cool, but she had nothing left in her for game playing. “You should be sorry,” she said loudly. The two women turned their heads her way, and even Bert was watching.
In spite of her best intentions at staying neutral, tears sprang to her eyes and all the rage and resentment she felt spilled out. “You dumped me, and you didn’t even say goodbye.” She made no attempt at lowering her voice. “You went rushing off as if I was some—some one-night stand you couldn’t wait to get rid of.” Her voice rose even higher. “You put your stupid Jeep ahead of me. How could you treat me like that?”
“My Jeep?” He looked puzzled. “I know I didn’t do the right thing, leaving the way I did, and I apologize, but I don’t get the Jeep part.”
That infuriated her. “You said you’d be back for your Jeep, and you might just have time to see me before you took off south. Words to that effect. Now do you remember?”
The two women weren’t even pretending not to listen. Good, she had witnesses, Ivy fumed.
“God, I’m such a jerk.” He closed his eyes and blew out a long breath. “Ivy, forgive me, please. I’m a total idiot. I was so scared to let myself care for you. It was like a virus I couldn’t shake. All I could do was walk away. I hadn’t gone far before I realized I’d made an awful mistake, the worst mistake of my life.” His voice deepened. “I love you, Ivy. Before I even try to explain, I want you to know that.”
The words yanked at her heartstrings, but she wasn’t ready to let him know. “Oh, yeah? You love me, huh? And why should I believe you?”
She heard one of the women say, “Right on, sister.”
Bert just looked confused. “Fight?” he signed.
Ivy nodded. “Damned right,” she mouthed in his direction.
Alex’s glasses were so dirty it was a miracle he could even see her. “You know I’m telling you the truth,” he said softly. “I may be an idiot, but I’ve never lied to you, Ivy.”
She thought that over and reluctantly had to admit it was true. He’d told her the truth even when she didn’t want to hear it. But she needed time to digest this new truth of his. And there were so many things she needed to know. The first was one she couldn’t even guess at. It had been plaguing her ever since she’d talked with Sage. She wrapped her arms around her midriff and said, “Why did my dad come looking for you, anyway?”
“Because he needed to tell me about meeting my father.”
She frowned. “I thought he told you. That day in the office.”
Alex shook his head. “Not all of it. According to Tom, they had an argument, your father and mine. That day Tom picked Roy up? They fought over Vietnam, if you can believe it. Tom says Roy was opinionated, stubborn and idealistic.”
“Like father, like son.”
“Probably. Things got pretty heated, and Tom stopped the truck and ordered Roy out, pretty much in the middle of nowhere, in a snowstorm. Tom’s always felt guilty.”
One of the women said, “Oh, my.”
Ivy nodded slowly. “I can see why Dad felt guilty. Especially after your father went missing.”
Alex shook his head. “It wasn’t Tom’s fault Nolan died.”
“No, it wasn’t.” Ivy couldn’t help but see the irony of Alex defending her father. But she understood far better than Alex the law of the Arctic.
If it hadn’t been for Bert, she, too, might have had to live with the same agonizing guilt. She might have waited too long before she went looking for Tom.
Her father’s actions hadn’t been heroic. Her beloved Captain was only human. He’d made serious mistakes and lived to regret them.
She’d done that herself, with her mother. It hurt to remember how cruel she’d been to Frances. Seeing Tom so close to death today, she’d also learned that harboring anger and resentment was dangerous. You could forever lose the opportunity to let someone know you loved them, no matter what they’d done.
No matter what they hadn’t done.
She opened her mouth to tell Alex that in spite of everything, she loved him, but her mother interrupted before she could get the words out.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
You know what I’ve always said about marriage, Lindy, that it isn’t for me. But a guy’s got a right to change his mind. When I get back we’ll talk about it.
From the last letter written by Roy Nolan,
April, 1972
“IVY?” Frances hurried over to them. Ivy wrapped her arms around her mother. For a long moment, they held each other.
Feeling this close to her mother, being physically demonstrative with her, was still new, and Ivy marveled at the comfort it gave her. Frances greeted Alex and Bert, and then turned back to Ivy.
“I spoke to the doctor—she said we can see Tom now. He has pneumonia and a concussion. What happened, Ivy? I didn’t even know he was overdue on a flight.”
“Neither did I.” Shame sent color flaming in Ivy’s face. “I thought he’d holed up because of the storm and gone fishing. I feel so bad for just assuming that.”
Frances shook her head and hugged Ivy again. “He went off on his own in the Beaver all the time, how could you know this time was any different? Tell me exactly what happened.”
Ivy stuck to the facts, saying only that Tom had gone to look for Alex. There’d be time enough later to fill her mother in on all the reasons for that.
“Tom must have followed procedure exactly,” she said. She didn’t need to add that otherwise he wouldn’t be around. Her mother knew enough about planes to understand that very well.
“He hit his head,” Ivy went on, “probably when the plane hit. But somehow he made it to the cabin. Alex found him a day or so later.”
“There wasn’t a lot I could do, apart from keeping him warm and making hot drinks,” Alex explained. “All I had with me was aspirin.”
“And then you lit the outhouse—you saved his life,” Ivy said. She hadn’t fully appreciated that until right now.
Alex smiled at her. His teeth were very white against his dark beard. They were the only part of him that looked clean. “You think they’re going to charge me with arson?”
Before Ivy could reply, one of the women who’d been listening said in a booming voice, “My son’s a lawyer, and a darned good one. If they try anything like that, you just call him, young man. Here’s his card.” With some effort, she struggled to her feet and thrust it into Alex’s hand. “Arson, indeed. Why, sounds to me like you’re a hero.” She turned to Ivy. “And excuse me for butting in, young lady, but I think you should just let bygones be bygones.”
“Cut him a break, honey,” the other woman agreed. “My goodness, this is more exciting than Days Of Our Lives.”
Ivy started to giggle and couldn’t stop.
She’d barely regained control of herself when Doctor Fredricks strode through the door. He put a large hand on Ivy’s shoulder, extending his other to Frances. “Ivy, hi. Hello, Frances. Carrie just told me that Tom’s in ICU, if there’s anything I can do—?”
Ivy looked up at him. He really was a good-looking man, very tall and dark and handsome, distinguished-looking in his sharply pressed khakis and button-down checked shirt. Clean, very clean.
Too bad he hadn’t rung any bells for her. Things would have been a lot easier. “Thanks, Dylan, it’s good of you to offer. But Doctor Rothel’s been great. She said we could go see Dad soon.”
Dylan nodded. “Carrie’s the best, she’ll make sure everything goes well. And I’ll keep tabs on Tom for you as well.”
“He’s going to try and sign himself out the moment he can walk,” Frances warned.
Dylan gave her a warm, reassuring smile. “Don’t worry ab
out that, we’ll use restraints if we have to.”
Alex was interpreting for Bert, and Ivy noticed that he was the only one who didn’t smile at Dylan’s little joke. She also noted that he wasn’t too pleased about the arm Dylan had casually snaked around her shoulders.
“Dylan Fredricks, this is Alex Ladrovik,” Ivy said. “And you know Bert.”
Dylan nodded and smiled at the other two men.
“Alex found Dad after his plane went into the lake,” Ivy added.
“Pleasure to meet you, Alex.” Dylan extended an antiseptically clean, well-cared-for hand, nails short and manicured. He still managed to keep one arm around Ivy.
“And you.” Alex’s hand with its broken nails and raw scratches looked as if it had done hard, dirty work very recently. All of him looked that way, Ivy concluded.
And she knew for a fact he didn’t smell anything like the expensive aftershave that wafted from Dylan.
Alex was definitely her kind of man. She reached up and took Dylan’s hand in hers for a moment, enjoying the narrow-eyed glare Alex gave both of them. A little jealousy wasn’t a bad thing.
“Would you like some coffee, or maybe lunch?” Dylan said. “I’m just heading down to the cafeteria.” The invitation included everyone, but Ivy suspected it was meant for her. She decided to put Alex out of his misery.
“Thanks, Dylan, but we’re going to see Dad now.” She slid out from under his arm and reached a hand out to Alex, threading her fingers through his. She knew the conclusions Dylan would draw from that, and a glance at his face proved she was right.
“Coming, Alex?”
“Absolutely.” The force of his grip on her fingers made her wince.
Tom was allowed one visitor at a time, for ten minutes only, so Frances went first. When Ivy’s turn came, she was shocked all over again at how frail Tom appeared, propped high on pillows, tubes in his veins, oxygen prongs in his nostrils. His breathing was shallow and so obviously difficult she suddenly felt as if she, too, couldn’t get a deep breath.
“Hey, Captain. Don’t try to talk. I—I just wanted you to know that I love you, and I’m so glad you got out when the Beaver sank.” Her voice was wobbly. “You’ll have to tell me exactly how you did that. I remember studying it but it’s a tricky maneuver. For now, though, just concentrate on getting better, okay?” She leaned over and kissed his stubbly cheek.
Tears welled in Tom’s blue eyes. “Lost—the Beaver. Lost—everything.” His voice was almost gone, and it was obviously an effort to speak. Ivy wiped his tears away with a tissue.
“No, you didn’t. Not everything. Not even close. As for the Beaver, we’ll get another one. We’ve got insurance, remember?”
He tried to smile at her, but the effort was too much.
“That—yahoo of yours,” he whispered.
“Alex?” For a moment, she tensed, wondering what Tom was going to say. And then she relaxed. She didn’t really care anymore what her father thought of Alex, Ivy realized. She didn’t care what anyone thought. The only thing that mattered was what she felt.
“He’s—good people, Ivy. Give him a chance.”
Coming from Tom, it was high praise.
“Chance, hell. He’s right out of chances. I’m going to hogtie him and get him to the altar before he runs away again.” It would take some adjustment on both sides, but she figured they could manage that.
“Good girl. About time,” he breathed. His eyes shut. Ivy smiled and brushed the thinning hair back from his forehead and, after a moment, she tiptoed out.
Alex was waiting for her. He’d washed up while she was in with Tom. It was an improvement, but it was going to take more than a hospital bathroom to really make a difference. But she’d learned that heroes came in all sorts of disguises.
“How is he?” Behind his glasses, his dark eyes were weary.
“He’s going to be okay. Why don’t we go home, Alex? I’ve got a bathtub and lots of hot water. I might even have a razor somewhere.”
“Home?” He gave her a puzzled look.
“To my place. You’ve never seen my house. You’ll like it. You can clean up and then take me somewhere nice for dinner.” She glanced at his clothes. “First we’ll stop off at The Prospector and get you some clothes.”
“No, Ivy.” He glanced around. There was no one nearby. “We’re not putting this off any longer. Roy never asked my mother to marry him until it was too late. He got around to talking about it in the very last letter he wrote her. He walked away from love, Ivy. He died before he could remedy his mistake. I followed in his footsteps long enough to know that walking away isn’t what I want. I want you.”
And then he did something that astonished her. Alex dropped to one knee on the shiny floor, oblivious to the amused glances of two nurses passing by and an orderly pushing an empty stretcher.
“I love you, Ivy. I want to have kids with you. If that means making Alaska home and riding around in that damned helicopter with you, I’ll give it my best shot. So will you marry me?”
She ought to make him suffer a little, but summer was coming. It was the best time to get married in Alaska. All the locals knew that the long winter darkness was the perfect time for making babies.
Dearest Tom—
Just a note to confirm that I’ll be arriving in Anchorage on Friday, April 9, Alaskan Airlines flight 270. I can’t wait to see our grandson, those hospital photos never do them justice. My job is all I dreamed it would be, but I miss you, Tom. And I never thought I’d say this, but I also miss Valdez. We have a lot to talk about, and so much to celebrate. See you soon. Frances.
ISBN: 978-1-4592-2169-7
PAST LIES
Copyright © 2006 by Bobby Hutchinson.
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