Janey rolled her eyes but patted her SPI:KE’s arm soothingly. ‘Don’t worry. We’ll be in our spy gear. I’ll come back to Wow up later.’
‘Right you are, Blondette,’ said G-Mamma, checking the clock. ‘We’ll meet in seven hours. Your dad’s improved the Satispy system so we’ll zap ourselves over there. Now, go and do your daughterly duties and keep Mumsy out of the way.’ She pointed to the screen projected on to the massive fridge: next door, Jean Brown was heading up the stairs.
Janey dived for the fireplace tunnel and just managed to get to her own hearth as her mother entered the room with a pile of clothes. ‘Put these away, please, and then we’ll . . .’
Jean Brown stopped suddenly and ducked her head, staring directly behind Janey into the fireplace. Janey winced. She hadn’t had time to close the panel between her room and the Spylab; any minute now her mum would discover what she was up to every night. They’d move house. Her spy life would be over . . .
‘What is . . . ?’ Her mum glared at her. ‘How did you get paint in your fireplace?’
Janey spun around. A slick of magenta paint was snaking its way across the hearth, but to her great relief the passageway was closed off. G-Mamma must have activated the panel for her, spilling a pot of paint in the process. Smiling regretfully, she said, ‘Sorry, Mum. I . . . there was a spider in there and I threw the nearest thing at it.’
Jean tutted. ‘Honestly, Janey. Well, make sure you clear it up.’ She dropped the laundry stack on to the end of Janey’s bed and sat down next to it. ‘Just one more day before the summer holidays, and we haven’t organized a thing. Shall we book a holiday?’ She beamed at Janey, who wondered once more how she was going to let her mum down without hurting her feelings.
‘Oh, I don’t know . . . the weather’s nice here. We could just hang around at home, couldn’t we?’ At home, near Solfari Lands, available for SPI work . . . They couldn’t go away now.
Jean looked a little disappointed, then shrugged. ‘All right. I’ve got some time off work. Joy’s going to stand in for me. Why don’t we do a few day trips?’
Janey nodded and gave her mum a hug. ‘Day trips sound perfect. The one to the wildlife park today was fantastic.’
‘OK. Think of some places you’d like to go,’ said Jean, getting up from the bed. ‘And tea’s ready in half an hour.’
It was really impossible to fathom, thought Janey over her sausage, chips and baked beans, how Jean Brown could be so ignorant of Janey’s other life, particularly when she herself had once been a super-SPI. Rather ashamed, Janey realized how good she had become at acting, playing a role. Or lying, as her mother might call it.
But any guilt Janey felt about hiding her double life was soothed away a few hours later as the Wower’s robotic arms massaged her bony shoulders, encased her in silver Lycra and kitted her out in Fleet-feet, Girl-gauntlet and slender black Ultra-gogs. She felt a surge of excitement and power as a mirage of swirling droplets spun her hair into a platinum ponytail, and a cool female voice informed her, ‘Jane Blonde, Sensational Spylet: you are ready for action.’
G-Mamma was already Wowed, a vision in striped fuchsia and a veiled turban that made her look rather like a fancy marquee. ‘That’s better,’ she said approvingly, looking Janey up and down. ‘I’m rather fond of Jane the Blonde.’
Janey sensed a rap coming on, so she quickly scooped up Trouble, entered the coordinates for Solfari Lands and pressed the Satispy remote. The Spycat disintegrated before their eyes and shot up through the skylight in tiny pieces, like bubbles in a bottle of fizzy drink.
‘You next,’ said G-Mamma, taking the remote.
Janey stationed herself where Trouble had been standing and waited for the peculiar pins-and-needles sensation as her cells split away from each other and then zinged up to a satellite in space. As ever, a wave of nausea hit as she neared the satellite, then she was streaming back down to Earth in a river of cells, which joined together so her body reconnected before her eyes, and the floor of the Solfari Lands Spylab loomed up at her.
They were among the last to arrive. Other SPIs and Spylets were leaning against the workbenches, chatting quietly as G-Mamma plummeted through the skylight, which, by day, just looked like a square of turf next to the Amphibion House.
Janey looked around. Alfie and his mum were there, of course, and several other families of SPIs she’d already met: Titian Ambition, known as Tish, and her mother, Magenta, in their trademark red SPIsuits; Leaf Erikssen, in racing green, along with his father, Ivan; and Eagle and Peregrine with their Spylet twins, Rook and . . .
Blackbird? Janey did a double take. Blackbird had disappeared on their last mission and was almost certainly responsible for feeding information to Copernicus! Tish was also glaring at the Spylet in the shimmering, feather-covered black SPIsuit. Janey almost grinned in spite of her shock: Tish could never keep her feelings to herself.
‘Welcome, everyone,’ said Abe, entering through a door at the back of the lab. ‘G-Mamma, could you close off the skylight?’
G-Mamma pushed a button under the little window, and the square of earth dropped back into place.
‘Thank you. You’ll all need to make sure it’s the first thing you do when you arrive for patrol.’
‘Patrol?’ said Leaf, his Scandinavian accent as delicate as his appearance. ‘Like in the army?’
‘If you like. Let me explain myself more clearly.’ Abe pointed to the door he had just come through. ‘That room is the location of my most amazing – and frightening – discovery so far. It’s a process I’m calling Revolution. I’m sorry that I can’t tell you any more about it. I think the less you know, the better it will be if you are captured.’
‘And . . . like, tortured?’ said Alfie quietly.
Abe sighed. ‘I sincerely hope it never comes to that, but there is always the danger that our enemies will try to pressure you into telling them what you know. However, for my safety and the protection of the Revolution secret, I want a guard around the Spylab twenty-four/seven. It’s not your most exciting mission, I’m afraid. But it could be your most vital.’
Everyone was quiet as they wondered what miraculous discovery Abe had made. Suddenly a peculiar chattering noise cut through the silence. It’s coming from behind that door, thought Janey. She looked at her father, her eyebrows raised.
Abe cleared his throat. ‘No one is to go through there,’ he said with cool emphasis, pausing after every word. ‘Now, Halo, can I leave the organization of this mission to you?’
‘Of course,’ said Mrs Halliday. ‘I’ll draw up a rota. School timetables, you know – I’m pretty good at that kind of thing.’
For the first time since they had arrived, Abe’s face relaxed into a genuine film-star smile. ‘Perfect. We’ll start tonight, if that’s OK. Everyone to take their times from Halo.’
‘Me first, Maisie!’ yelled G-Mamma, swirling her hips like a deep pink tornado. ‘Blonde and I will do the first stint. If you like . . .’ she added, as Magenta and Ivan frowned in her direction.
Mrs Halliday nodded. ‘That’s fine. There are twelve of us, so there will be four spies on each of the three eight-hour shifts. Blonde, Al Halo, G-Mamma and I will take this 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. shift, so Blonde is back home before her mother suspects anything. Then Leaf and Ivan, Tish and Magenta – are you OK for 6 a.m. until 2 p.m.? And then the Bird family, you’ll do two till ten. We’ll rotate after a week.’
Janey looked around at the people in the room. Her father was watching everyone’s reactions with great interest, and he wasn’t the only one. Blackbird’s dark gaze flicked anxiously from one person to the next. Janey had to say something.
She raised her hand slowly. ‘Um, I don’t want to be mean, but we all know there’s a double agent in the room.’ Nobody said anything, although Blackbird’s head dropped instantly. ‘Blackbird, you gave my eSPIdrills to Copernicus so that he could find out the exact formation of the centre of the earth. Why should we trust you?’
‘Why did you do it?’ asked Janey gently.
Blackbird sniffed noisily and shook her head, looking more bird-like than ever. ‘I was stupid, that’s why. I was just trying to be important, like all the rest of you are. I wasn’t picked for the mission, and I wasn’t very good at anything, and—’
‘I was not picked for the mission either,’ said Leaf bitterly. ‘But did I go become a traitor? No. I, Leaf Erikssen, directly descended from the man who first discovered America, was not chosen, and still I acted with respect. Why could you not do that?’
‘You’re descended from Columbus?’ said Alfie incredulously. ‘Wasn’t he Spanish or something?’
‘No, no, no. From Leif Erikssen, the Viking,’ Leaf snapped as he turned back to Blackbird. ‘So?’
‘C-Copernicus said I could be his chief Spylet if I just got him your eSPIdrills. I’m . . . so sorry.’ And she burst into racking sobs. Rook, who up until then had been looking rather disgusted, patted his sister awkwardly on the arm.
Abe held up a hand. ‘Look, I knew this would be a concern for you, but I have spoken to Blackbird and I am quite confident that she made an error of judgement. And that she is now completely loyal to our cause.’
‘I am! I really, really am,’ wailed Blackbird, wiping her nose on her feathery arm.
‘So can we all agree to forget about that incident?’ Abe looked at each of his spies and Spylets in turn, Leaf first, and they all stared intently at Blackbird and then nodded slowly.
Janey suddenly felt sorry for Blackbird. She’d made a few wrong decisions herself in the past, guided by her emotions rather than by logic. She’d even been tempted to give up spying altogether, simply because she hadn’t been chosen for the last mission either. And if her dad trusted the other Spylet . . . She smiled at Blackbird. ‘OK,’ she said softly. ‘All forgotten.’
And so the first patrol settled in for the evening, and the mission – to protect Revolution – began.
Abe disappeared through his mysterious door as Jane and Alfie took up their stations outside. Alfie was still muttering about Leaf. Jane had noticed before that he didn’t like it when someone else appeared to know something he didn’t. ‘Everyone knows Columbus discovered America. Leaf’s totally wrong . . .’
‘Alfie,’ said Janey softly, ‘I think we’ve got more important things to worry about than that.’
And she was right.
As soon as Janey got into school the next morning she was called to Mrs Halliday’s office. Alfie was already there, and he shrugged, mystified, as Janey walked in.
‘We’re needed back at the Solfari Lands lab,’ said Mrs Halliday briefly. ‘We’ll have to go as soon as school finishes. Thank goodness it’s a half-day today.’
‘What’s happened?’ Janey thought instantly of her father. ‘Is Dad OK?’
‘He’s fine, but he’s not very happy,’ said Mrs Halliday. ‘During the handover between our shift and the next, something went missing – something vital to Revolution.’
‘Well, we haven’t got it,’ said Alfie indignantly. ‘Whatever it is,’ he added hastily.
Mrs Halliday looked grim but would say no more. Janey was bursting with questions and worries but had to contain herself for the rest of the morning. What was the mysterious stolen object? Were they under suspicion? Whatever had disappeared had gone missing just as their shift was going home. Surely her father wouldn’t suspect them? Would he?
monkey mayhem
‘Someone stole a monkey?’ Janey gazed at her father, perplexed. ‘How would they steal a monkey? And, um, why?’ But then Janey remembered the noise they had heard last night . . . the noise that had come from her father’s Revolution room. A monkey . . .
‘When did you notice it was gone?’ said Alfie sensibly.
‘Eight o’clock this morning,’ said Abe.
‘Aha!’ Alfie jumped to his feet and paced the room, a mini Sherlock Holmes in school uniform. ‘So it could have disappeared at any time during the night. It could have been on either shift, or even before we all gathered here at midnight.’
Abe nodded. ‘You’re right. Which means someone may well know about Revolution . . .’ Janey had never seen her father look so grave.
‘You know what does seem weird though,’ said Janey suddenly. ‘The one person we have most reason to be worried about wasn’t on either of those shifts. Maybe Blackbird arranged it especially so that all the suspicion would fall on us.’
The others looked at her, one or two of them starting to nod their agreement. ‘That is right,’ said Leaf. ‘She has set us up.’
‘It doesn’t make sense,’ said Abe shortly. ‘Blackbird is desperate to be one of us again. She’d know she’d be the first one to fall under the spotlight.’
‘And anyway, old Copper Knickers is dead,’ said G-Mamma. ‘There’s nobody to pull her strings.’
That was true. They all looked glumly at each other, unable to come up with any solutions or sensible suggestions. And just as the atmosphere became completely gloomy, Janey voiced the most horrible thought of all. ‘Maybe he’s not.’
‘Maybe he’s not what, Jane the Insane?’ G-Mamma’s bright blue eye peered at her through the hole of a doughnut, purchased from the Solfari Lands Cafe as they’d arrived.
Janey swallowed slowly. ‘Maybe Copernicus isn’t dead. I know he should be, buried deep down in the Antarctic in a broken rocket, but SPUD Nik managed to get out . . .’ Her robot penguin had been trapped with Copernicus, but he’d escaped.
‘No,’ said Alfie, almost spitting out the word. ‘Not again. He was meant to be dead after you SPInamited him in the Wower.’
‘And he wasn’t.’ Janey looked around at the solemn faces. ‘I bet he’s free. Somehow.’
Her father had already turned to the computer as G-Mamma slammed a fist into her other hand. ‘Oh, you just lemme at him,’ she growled. ‘I’ll squish that squid, righty almighty. Like this!’ She leaped out of her seat and mimed the actions to her rap:
‘I’ll squish him, uh-huh uh-huh,
I’ll squish him dead . . .
By sitting, uh-huh uh-huh,
On his squiddy head.’
She looked so ferocious that no one dared laugh. Then Abe looked up from the computer. His face was ashen.
‘It’s not good news,’ he said.
He swivelled the computer screen round to show them the article he’d found on an international news website. ‘Mutant Colossal Squid sighted in warm waters,’ ran the headline.
Holidaymakers surfing off the Florida coast near Titusville were staggered to find an unusual creature sharing the sea with them. Several eyewitnesses have sworn that they barely avoided being wrapped up in the tentacles of a strange octopus-like creature. Said Michael Palfryman of the University of West Florida: ‘It really sounds like a Colossal Squid, which is pretty amazing – most other sightings have been in the dark, freezing waters of the Antarctic, like the vast specimen picked up by fishermen near New Zealand recently.’ The creature is thought to have been damaged in a fight, perhaps with a shark, as one eye is barely visible while the other is huge and yellow. Coastguards are warning swimmers and surfers to be vigilant.
Janey’s worst fear had just been realized. Copernicus was back. ‘That’s got to be him,’ she said. ‘Usually seen in the Antarctic, one eye bigger than the other . . .’
‘But what’s he doing in Florida?’ asked Tish.
Alfie opened a new packet of chewing gum and started chomping furiously. ‘Maybe he’s having a holiday,’ he said hopefully. ‘Must be tiring, after all, when you keep . . .’ he chewed a bit harder, ‘. . . escaping . . . DEATH.’
But Janey knew – they all knew – that the truth had to be more sinister. Wherever Copernicus was, there was danger. And wherever danger was, thought Janey, someone else should be.
Jane Blon
de.
‘I have to go to Florida,’ she said decisively.
Abe stared at her for a moment, visibly struggling between his wish to keep his daughter safe and the need to get his best spies on the job to tackle his arch-enemy. He thought out loud: ‘He’s luring us to him . . . he’s recruited someone to steal from me while he’s busy preparing to wreak havoc in America. Now it’s like he’s calling us . . . I can’t let you go . . . But we need to know exactly how far he’s got with Revolution . . .’ Suddenly he nodded. ‘Yes. Janey, I need you to go. But not on your own.’
Alfie let out a low growl, which startled everyone. ‘I’ll go too.’ He glared at Leaf, who’d dared to look at him. ‘My father, my problem.’
‘All right, Alfie,’ said his mother. ‘But I’m coming as well.’
‘And me!’ yelped G-Mamma.
The others all looked about to volunteer so Abe tapped on the table to get everyone’s attention. ‘I do still need some of you here,’ he said with a rueful smile. ‘G-Mamma, if you and Leaf could take over the night shift, I’d be very grateful. Magenta and Tish, the early shift. And, Ivan, I’m going to need your cell-tracing expertise in this new process, if that’s all right with you.’
The SPIs and Spylets agreed readily, although G-Mamma and Leaf still looked a tiny bit mutinous. Both hated to be left out of the most exciting – and dangerous – part of the mission.
‘We’ll catch whoever’s monkey-stealing,’ G-Mamma muttered in a loud aside to Leaf, determined to make their work matter every bit as much as the Florida trio’s. ‘I’ll get Agent Dubbo Seven over from Oz – he’s good at tracking and what have you. We’ll track ’em and sack ’em.’
‘Track them and sack them,’ agreed Leaf earnestly.
So, with the arrangements in place, they all headed off to their various home locations to prepare for the next part of the mission. As they pulled up near her house Mrs Halliday eyed Janey in the mirror. ‘So how do we deal with your mum this time, Janey?’
Golden Spy Page 2