by Freer, Echo;
‘Kameran?’ I made a mental note to ask Wanda for more facts about Grandma Goodfox and the warning signs of insanity.
‘Yes, sorry,’ said a voice from behind the old armchair next to the fireplace. ‘I’m here.’
I peered over the back of the chair and saw Kameran, huddled in his coat, crouched down practically in the fire. He was way too old to be playing hide-and-seek, so unless he was a secret pyromaniac, I guessed he might have been searching for a lost contact lens or something like that.
‘I got a bit cold,’ he explained, standing up and moving over to the table. ‘OK if I keep my jacket on?’
‘Fine,’ I replied. And, I must say, as I crossed the room, I was starting to feel a bit chilly myself. ‘I’ll put another log on the fire.’ I picked up one of the lumps of wood from the basket next to the hearth, but before I could put it into the flames, a huge black cloud of smoke billowed out of the fireplace.
Kameran leapt back. ‘Whoa!’
‘Soot belch,’ I said, fanning away the smoke. ‘It means the wind’s in the wrong direction.’
‘It wasn’t windy when I was coming here. It’s probably the chimney that needs sweeping,’ he suggested as he coughed his way out of the smog and sat down at the table.
I shook my head. ‘No, it was almost the first thing Wanda did last week. She’s very particular about chimneys - ever since the one where we were staying in Canada caught fire and burnt down the whole log cabin.’
Kameran smiled. ‘Is there anywhere you haven’t lived?’
I shrugged. ‘Oh, loads of places, I expect. Now, shall we get started?’
I picked up the tarots but, no sooner had I begun unwrapping the silk scarf that I keep them in, than something else strange happened; the curtains started flapping about. At first it was just a gentle flutter but then they whooshed right out into the room. It was like there was a hurricane blowing outside. Oh boy! For my first reading in a new town, this was not going according to plan at all.
But Kameran seemed to find the whole thing funny. ‘Oh, I get it - these are all part of the special effects, right? You know, mysterious things happening to create a creepy atmosphere. I expect your mum’s hiding in a broom cupboard somewhere and, any minute now, she’ll be knocking three times pretending to be some long lost auntie from the other side.’
I must say, I was disappointed in him. I’d thought Kameran had been genuine when he’d asked me to read his cards, but now he was taking the baklava like everyone else.
I gave him one of my looks - Wanda says they’d scare the bejezzus out of Old Nick himself. ‘This isn’t Hollywood, you know. Tarots should never be treated lightly. If you’re not serious there’s no point in going on.’
He held up both hands in a gesture of submission. ‘Sorry, it was just all the stuff with the fire and the curtains and everything.’
‘Like I said, it’s the wind, OK?’
He cocked his head on one side and smiled. ‘I guess I’ve just been watching too many scary movies, eh?’
‘Something like that,’ I said, shuffling the cards. ‘Now, is there anything in particular that you want to know the answer to? Or is it just a general reading you’re after?’
‘Well...’ Kameran lowered his eyes and looked embarrassed. ‘There’s someone that I really fancy and I want to know if it’s likely to go anywhere.’
‘OK.’ I gave a little shudder. Even though the fire was roaring, the room was feeling icier than a freezer in Antarctica. I reached over for Wanda’s shawl that she’d left over the back of the chair and wrapped it round my shoulders before carrying on. I handed the cards to Kameran to shuffle too, but I could see that he was shivering so much his hands were shaking.
When he’d finished I spread out the cards on the chenille tablecloth that Wanda takes everywhere with her and asked him to pick out five cards with his left hand. As I turned them over, I looked at the cards in front of me; they were nearly all from one suit.
‘Oh wow!’ I exclaimed. ‘So many cups - including the ace! Boy are you in for some serious love!’
He looked at me sheepishly and grinned. ‘Cheers! It’s been worth my fiver just to hear that.’
I went through the meaning of each card with him and, as I was explaining the reading, it occurred to me that I was pretty sure I knew who it was he fancied. If I were a betting person, I’d have put my bottom Euro on it being Milly Ventress, the girl who’s been showing me round. That’s obviously why he’d been hanging around with us all week. And I had an amazing idea - how fantastic would it be if I could get them together - as a sort of thank you to them both for being so kind to me? Oh wow, that would be so brilliant. I always think it’s good to have a project on the go and Kameran and Milly were going to be mine - for as long as it took Wanda to get us evicted from Whitby, anyway.
I was feeling quite excited about my new goal and was just standing up to let Kameran out, when there was another blast of wind and the metal latch on the door began to rattle as though someone was trying to come in.
‘It’s probably just Wanda,’ I explained. Then I called, ‘It’s OK. You can come in now. We’re finished.’ But when I opened the door, Wanda wasn’t there. She wasn’t even near by because I could hear her chanting in the back room. How bizarre!
And at that minute, there was a crash from over by the window. I looked down and saw the pot plant that Teddy had placed on the window sill for Wanda was lying in a mess of terracotta and soil on the floor.
‘You got a cat?’ Kameran asked.
I shook my head, puzzled. Then the curtains blew right out into the middle of the room again, till they were almost at right angles to the floor. Ah, that explained it!
‘Boy do we need to get some industrial strength draught excluder in this place!’ I said to Kameran.
He gave me a sideways look. ‘You sure your mum’s not hiding behind there with a hairdryer?’ But the minute he’d said it he held up his hands again. ‘Just kidding!’
I walked him to the front door and, as he left, he told me that he’d put the word about and get me some more readings - which was a relief. It’d been such a strange evening, it wouldn’t have surprised me if he’d never wanted to have anything to do with me or my tarots again.
‘Night,’ I said, waving him off down the steps. ‘See you at school on Monday. And mind the geraniums.’
I watched him walk down the alley towards Church Street. At the bottom of the steps, he turned to wave back at me, slipped off his jacket and tossed it over his shoulder. ‘It’s warmer out here than it is inside,’ he called as he broke into a jog and disappeared from view.
He was right; it was mild. And not a breath of wind, either. Weird!
3
True to his word, by lunchtime on Monday, Kameran had lined up three clients for me at six pounds a time. Brilliant! If I could keep this up, Wanda and I would have the cottage decorated in no time.
I wasn’t totally happy about the venue he’d found for our little enterprise though. I like to try and create a degree of spirituality when I do a reading but the store cupboard at the back of the gym had about as much spirituality as a launderette on a wet Saturday night in Vladivostok. And believe me, I should know!
‘I tried everywhere,’ he said, apologetically. ‘The RE room, the Year 12 common room, the library. This was the only place that would guarantee privacy.’
‘It’s cool,’ I said, forcing a smile on to my face to try and combat the smell of sweat from the PE group who’d just been in there. The fragrance didn’t have quite the same ambience as the incense and rose water I usually use, but I didn’t want Kameran to think I was ungrateful. To make things even more uncomfortable, the store cupboard was right next to the boiler room, so it was like an oven in there and the heat made the sweaty smell even more pungent. ‘Really, it’s fine. I’ve done readings i
n worse places.’ Which wasn’t strictly true. Even though I believe that honesty is absolutely the best policy, I like to think of the truth as a bit like a band-aid - it sometimes needs to be stretched to cover up the wound and make people feel better. Kameran wasn’t looking totally convinced, so I sat myself down on a pile of rubber mats, used the leg of the vaulting horse for a backrest and grabbed a large plastic storage box of shuttlecocks for a table.
‘See - perfect!’ I reassured him.
Kameran was still looking dubious but he took up his position outside the door, doubling as lookout and cashier.
First up was a sixth former called Celia Winterbottom who wanted guidance on whether or not to take a year out after her exams. The message in the cards was that, instead of worrying about what to do after her exams, Celia would have been better if she’d worked harder before them! I didn’t tell her that though - best not to give people bad news. So I told her that she was about to embark on a period of learning and hard work - I left it up to her to decide whether that would be at university, crammer-college doing re-sits, or backpacking round the world attending the University of Life.
Then came Kameran’s friend Joel who was about as convincing a client as an Inuit would be a desert scout. I didn’t need to be psychic to see that Kameran had put him up to it.
‘So what would you like guidance on?’ I asked, spreading the cards on the plastic box of shuttlecocks.
Joel was trying so hard not to laugh that there was nearly a puddle on the mat.
‘You tell me - you’re the one who’s supposed to read minds.’
Wow - that’s original!
I gave Joel a general reading, and was shocked to see that, for someone who always seemed to be joking about, there was masses of sadness in his past. And, I didn’t tell Joel this, but his future didn’t look too promising either. In fact, I couldn’t see anything beyond his twenties. To be honest, it kind of spooked me a bit, so I didn’t say anything except to hand him his money back and tell him to go out and treat himself to something nice.
‘Wow! I like this - Kameran pays me to come and have my fortune told and you do it for nothing. At this rate, I’ll be worth a mint. Cheers!’ he laughed, stuffing the money into his pocket as he left.
I never like it when a reading shows something unpleasant but, as a professional, I mustn’t let it affect me. So I gathered myself for the final client, Milly, the girl who’d been showing me round. All last week Milly had been going on and on about her new boyfriend, Eddy Proudfoot, only now she’d heard a rumour that he was cheating on her. She wanted to know if it was true, and if so, what to do about it. I was tempted to give her her money back and just tell her to dump the skunk, but when I looked at her cards, I realised this was the perfect opportunity to kill three birds with one stone - I could guide Milly towards a more reliable romance, put my match making skills into action and assist my new friend Kameran in his pursuit of love. I felt very excited.
‘I see new beginnings and romantic changes,’ I told Milly. ‘Look out for someone of a loyal and faithful nature...’
‘Sounds like a golden retriever,’ Milly commented, rubbing her arms and giving a shiver. ‘Ooo, it’s gone cold in here.’
She was right: the cupboard had suddenly gone from furnace to freezer in about a nanosecond. I pulled my own jumper round my shoulders and carried on. ‘No, this is definitely not someone of the canine variety - and romance is very well aspected.’ My plan was going way better than I’d hoped. I studied the cards again and saw just what I was looking for. ‘He’s tall, athletic, intelligent...human!’ I added, just to be sure she wasn’t going to go out and buy a puppy. ‘It’s someone already close to you...and I see the letter K.’
Milly would need to be severely intellectually challenged not to realise that the cards were pointing her in the direction of Kameran. Everything seemed to be going brilliantly, when I heard a strange rumbling - not loud enough for an earthquake but definitely louder than a late lunch. I stopped. It seemed to be coming from just above our heads.
Then there was a faint knocking on the door.
‘Aaaagh!’ Milly almost jumped out of her skin. Her eyes were the size of dinner plates and all the blood had drained from her face. Kameran’s head appeared round the door. ‘You idiot!’ she said to him. ‘I thought you were a ....’
‘Sssh!’ he whispered. ‘There’s someone in the girls’ changing room. Keep out of sight.’
He took a step forward to join us in the cupboard, but just at that moment, the source of the overhead rumbling was revealed; a row of volleyballs had inexplicably started trundling along the shelf above us, picking up speed until they began rolling off the edge - just over the door. As the first one fell, it hit Kameran right on the crown of his head. He reeled forwards and fell into the cupboard with a groan. Other balls bounced down, hitting the box of shuttlecocks and sending my tarots flying into the air. One ball ricocheted off the edge of the box, hit a trampette then bounced off the trampette and knocked over a stack of badminton racquets that cascaded to the floor with a clatter. Another ball crashed into a pile of cones that were used to practise dribbling while a third smashed into a box of table tennis equipment so that the volleyballs were joined by half a dozen of their smaller, ping-pong cousins, all raining down on us in a pretty spectacular ball-fest.
The whole episode probably only lasted ten seconds and when the activity finally stopped, Kameran sat up looking dazed.
‘There is something seriously spooky going on whenever you use those cards,’ he said, rubbing his head.
I was beginning to think he was right. This was only the second time I’d done a reading since we’d arrived in Whitby and both times weird things had happened. I looked up to the ceiling and said, to no one in particular, ‘Listen, if you guys don’t want me doing this stuff, then you only have to say. You don’t need to wreck the place.’
The colour, that had only recently returned to Milly’s cheeks, drained from them again. ‘Stop it - you’re scaring me.’
‘If anyone’s going to be doing any scaring, it’ll be me!’ A voice boomed from the other end of the gym. ‘Come out of there immediately!’ Even from inside the store room I could tell it was Mrs Twigg, the PE teacher. I’d only encountered her once before (and that was through a badminton net when I’d been trying to discuss the merits of non-competitive sport) but I’d decided that if ever there was an argument for not saving the whales, it was Mrs Twigg. Now, get me right - my love of exercise doesn’t extend much beyond yoga and nature walks, but even I could see that Mrs Twigg had to be the worst advert for PE - ever! Not only was she the size of your average beluga, but also, whenever she opened the door to her little room, a mushroom cloud of smoke escaped into the changing rooms. A girl could die of passive smoking just putting on her tracksuit. Come to think of it, that’s probably why she’d snuck in there that lunchtime.
‘Come here,’ she bellowed. ‘THIS MINUTE!’ Whoa! She really needed to address her anger issues.
Kameran and Milly went straight across to where she was waiting at the other end of the gym but I needed to gather my tarots, so I stayed in the store cupboard. From the ranting and raving going on, I was getting the impression that Mrs Twigg was unaware of me and thought that Kameran and Milly had been on some sort of clandestine love tryst - which shows that I’m not the only one who thinks they’d make the perfect couple.
I counted up and realised that I was still one card missing. Looking round, I caught sight of it peeking out from under a table tennis bat. But as I reached down to pick it up, I could’ve sworn I heard someone whisper something. I stood up and listened. There it was again; a male voice. And he sounded to be close. Hmm! Strange! I hoped no one had sneaked into the cupboard and overheard what I’d been saying to my clients.
‘Come out,’ I whispered. ‘Whoever you are.’ Mrs Twigg was still giving Kameran and
Milly the benefit of her barbed wire vocals and I did have a twinge of conscience that I wasn’t out there with them taking my share of the blame, but it was crucial that I’d got all my cards first, so I kept my voice down. ‘I know you’re in here.’
I looked around but the number of hiding places in the cupboard was pretty limited. I peered behind the plastic football goals and took a peek inside the wooden vaulting box but there was definitely no one in there. I decided that it was probably the caretaker in the boiler room next door. From the sub-zero temperature, I assumed that the boilers must have broken down, so there was probably some pretty frantic maintenance work going on next door. Feeling relieved that client confidentiality hadn’t been breached, I bent down and picked up the last card. Hmm, interesting! It was the Hanged Man.
Personally, I don’t believe in coincidence; I am a firm believer in synchronicity: everything happening at a specific time for a specific reason. So, I wondered, what did it signify that this card was the last one to find? Bearing in mind that The Hanged Man shows the need to adapt to change (like I haven’t done that all my life!) and to make adjustments and sacrifices in order to move on (don’t even start with the things I’ve had to sacrifice every time we’ve upped sticks and done a runner), was this telling me that I was going to have to give up my blossoming friendships and move on again? Already? I hoped not.
I was just about to give myself up and face the wrath of Mrs Twigg, when I heard the voice again - only clearer this time.
‘T’Anged Man!’ It said, urgently. ‘That’s what Ah need ti talk ti thi aboot.’
Oh my days! There was someone in the cupboard with me. And he seemed to be talking in a foreign language.
‘I don’t know who you are, but you shouldn’t be in here,’ I said, trying to sound cross - in a whispery sort of way. ‘Readings are supposed to be private!’ I had no idea where he was hiding, so I looked up in the vague direction of the shelf that the volleyballs had been on.