by Patti Larsen
“You accepted the job,” I said, sympathy fading. “It was your choice, Mom.”
Anger flashed on her face again. “I'm not complaining,” she bit back. “I'm explaining.” Her jaw worked, lips vibrating. “And were another witch the head of this Council, you would have been brought before a conclave long before now.”
Whoa. “Just let them try.”
“I don't want to give them a chance, Syd!” She was on her feet again, pacing, hugging herself. I glanced at Charlotte, seeing the concern flicker over the weregirl's face as she met my eyes. “Just for once, play by the rules. Please.” Mom stopped and stared at me, hands falling to her sides. “Think of the family, your coven. Don't give anyone more reason to question your ability to lead.”
My heart paused, fluttered. Beat again as my entire body went cold. Now that my anger had chilled out, I finally absorbed what she was saying. “Mom,” I said. “What the hell?”
She slowly sat, hands in her lap, face falling into weariness. “You scare them, sweetheart,” she said. Barked a sudden laugh that made me jump. “You scare me sometimes, you know that?” I shook my head as she went on. “And if they fear you, they will try to destroy you. You have to believe that.”
“This is ridiculous.” Talk about ungrateful. Maybe it was time to stop saving the Council's sorry asses, all of witchdom. Let them catch fire and burn in their own filth.
Okay then. But not okay. Not by a long shot off a short pier.
“Fine,” I said, shoulders slumping even as I felt my soul shrivel at the thought of giving up, of caving. “But when the bad crap happens and the whole show falls apart, do you think any of them will step up to do what needs to be done?”
She shook her head. “I know they won't,” she whispered.
Just. Freaking. Lovely.
***
Chapter Seven
I didn't sleep very well that night. Tossing and turning courtesy of Shaylee. My demon. My vampire.
My own anger.
Shenka was already asleep when I arrived back at our dorm room, and it was just as well. I didn't have time to deal with her weird coldness from earlier at lunch, not with my head spinning and my temper rising now that I was out of Mom's reach.
They are fools, my vampire sent with heat, showing her rare temper.
Agreed, my demon snarled.
Venemeth is evil, Shaylee spat.
Tell me something I didn't know. If Mom's worried, I sent to them, there's good reason. Why hadn't she told me how much trouble I'd been causing her?
Probably because it wouldn't have changed anything, my vampire sent. You've done only what comes as natural—saved them all from destruction over and over again. Imagine if we hadn't been there to prevent Batsheva from the inevitable destruction of Pannera and her blood clan?
Or the discovery of the Brotherhood infiltration in the European Council, Shaylee sent.
Or the Brotherhood's pursuit of domination. My demon chuffed softly. Like any of the Council or other leaders are prepared to step up when the time comes.
And yet. My vampire's anger cooled. I agree with your mother on one thing, Sydlynn. Because I've felt similar animosity and almost let it destroy me.
They are afraid of me. I rolled over on my side, hugging my pillow.
Fear is a powerful enemy, my vampire sent. History is full of examples of society destroying their saviors out of misplaced fear.
So what are we supposed to do, then? My demon growled, twisting inside me while Shaylee hunched deep, earth magic thrumming, making me feel ten times as heavy. Nothing?
Of course not, my vampire sent. But we must be more cautious. And have answers prepared in case we are asked to defend ourselves.
I don't know if you've noticed, I sent, feeling a hysterical giggle building inside me, but we don't exactly do caution and advanced planning very well.
For once, she didn't chastise me for my humor. Indeed, she sent with a hint of her own laughter. But perhaps it's something we need to learn.
Sigh.
I finally slept while my alter egos grumbled and settled. One thing was for sure—Mom's warning was just that. And she was right about putting the coven first. I felt a sharp jab of protectiveness for my family, knowing how much I risked them and their futures.
And yet, I didn't have a choice.
No self-pity. I was way past those days of falling into a black pit of boo-hoo. But a healthy dose of "why me" would have been nice, just this once.
Shenka was gone when I finally woke, groggy and out of sorts, the sun streaming in cheerful beams across my face.
Not feeling even remotely perky, I forced myself into the shower for a quick scrub before slumping my way down to the Yard and heading for breakfast. Charlotte remained silent through our walk, her usual. And though there were times I wished she'd talk to me, carry on a normal conversation, this wasn't one of those times. Her quiet suited me perfectly.
My friends were already assembled, chatting over breakfast, when I approached with my tray. It took me a full three breaths of absolute shock to comprehend my normal place next to Liam was full.
Of Tippy.
What?
The only place left was at the end of the table, between Josie and Nicci. And while I liked them both, it wasn't the same. Shenka sat on Liam's left, in Tippy's usual seat.
And the red haired wench with the big boobs she better stop brushing against his arm sat where I was supposed to be.
Worse? Liam, who normally blushed and turned away from her flirting, leaned close to the tart and laughed, whispering in her ear while she giggled and squeezed his bicep with her manicured hands.
Appetite successfully slain.
“Oh, hey, Syd!” Tippy waved with her plastic spoon, smiling like she wasn't the worst kind of vile traitor, her red hair falling across Liam's hand, her shoulder pressed to his. And didn't I just know her hot little thigh was cemented to his faded jeans?
I sank into the empty seat and stared at her. “Hi.” One word. All I could manage. Liam glanced up, met my eyes, looked away.
Without even a hint of guilt. Or recognition. Or friendliness.
I wondered how he'd look with my yogurt all over his stupid white t-shirt.
Conversation went on without me, as though I weren't even there, like my social world had done an abrupt about face and slammed me into a cement wall. There was a time I was forced into the life of a loner, when I wanted friends more than anything, something normal to cling to. And then a time I chose to be alone, where having friends to care about was too complicated. But I'd become complacent, accepted I could have people around me who treated me like I was just another witch.
The loner thing was looking pretty good again.
“Syd,” Tippy gushed at me, leaning over so far I could see the crumb of toast in her cleavage. Way down in her cleavage. Seriously. “We need to chat about my audition. I can't wait to show you what I can do for you and your coven.”
Like she had even the remotest chance now that she'd wrapped her disgusting little paws around my...
Choke.
My what? My Liam? But he wasn't my Liam, was he? He was right what he said yesterday. I'd told him time and again we couldn't be together. And yet, here I was going all jealous crazy.
What did that say about me and how I felt about him?
Sigh.
More to ponder. Punctuated by frustration when Shenka stood up without looking at me and stomped off. Damn her. Like I needed more drama.
Still, what was his problem? The Liam I knew wouldn’t turn tables so fast. I pondered the possibility Tippy was influencing him, refusing to believe he would purposely torture me over our earlier conversation about his mother.
He just wouldn’t.
It took a supreme effort to jerk myself under control and force a smile on my face in answer to Tippy.
“We'll see,” I said, my eyes going to Liam's face again even as he turned to push his breakfast around with his fork. Looked like I
wasn't the only one without much of an appetite. He finally set down his utensil and sat back, passing one big hand over his face as his cheeks paled a little.
“Are you okay?” Panic rippled around me despite my irritation with his about-face as Shaylee instantly reached for him, but he blocked us with his own magic and frowned, finally meeting my eyes.
“I'm fine,” he said, climbing to his feet, slinging his backpack over his shoulder. “Coming, Tips?”
She wriggled herself out of her chair and linked arms with him, giant bag in her free hand. “You betcha, handsome.” Her broad wink at me as they walked away lit the fire of my fury all over again.
When I looked back, I found Donalda watching me. “If you call poaching,” she said, “we'll all back you.”
So the other girls noticed, did they? What I'd taken for coldness toward me was just the opposite. I reached out and grabbed Donalda's hand, squeezed it before releasing her and taking Nicci's and finally Josie's.
“He's fair game,” I said, hating to say it, but knowing it was true. I finally embraced what I'd been asking Liam to accept all along. “No foul.”
All three girls stared a moment before Donalda shrugged and tsked softly.
“If you can't see how much he loves you,” she said, gathering her own things while the other two joined her, “I guess Tippy deserves him after all.”
I sat in stunned silence, feeling tears burn my eyes, the scent of breakfast making my stomach heave even as the warmth of the sun through the stained glass windows did nothing to dispel the shiver of goosebumps I rubbed away with rough hands.
Charlotte's low growl was the only warning I had, no time to pull myself out of sadness and into guarded anger in time. Venner sat next to me while Charlotte hummed her unhappiness, but I waved her off, hating he'd seen me vulnerable.
He didn't comment, at least. Would have lost something important to his survival if he had. Instead, he smiled his little smirk at me, green eyes sparkling as he toyed with the long, silver length of his hair, a large ring flashing on his right hand.
“I must say I was delighted to see you yesterday.” Yeah, right. Though, maybe he was. Shaylee spit and shrieked in my head, making it hard to focus. “The absolute delight on your face warmed my heart, Your Highness.”
Bastard. “I hope it keeps you warm at night,” I said, teeth flashing as I bared them in a viscous grin. “Considering you don't have many nights left to enjoy yourself.”
Venner reached out and patted my hand, putting his life in imminent danger. Not just from me, but from Charlotte. I could feel the wolf in her struggling to emerge, to tear his throat out with her teeth. And while the vision was inspiring, my demon and Shaylee adding to the gory details, I had Mom's warning to think about.
“I find your little Council so quaint,” he said, tapping his long, thin fingers on the tabletop. “And the board of governors.” He snorted elegantly—I'd never heard anyone manage it, but he did, the ass—and cupped his cheek in his free hand. “They adore me. So much. How lovely.”
“Lovely,” I echoed between clenched teeth. “I hate games, Venner. Just put your damned cards on the table and stop jerking my chain.”
“Oh, but doing so delights me.” He reached out for me again, took one of my hands in both of his, the cool, smooth skin creeping me out hard core. His lips brushed my knuckles as his large green eyes sparked with Sidhe magic. “And I'd hate to ruin the surprise too soon.”
“If you touch Liam,” I snarled, pushing forward until our noses practically touched, “or go one step near the Gate or anyone I care about, I will personally dismember you and hide your body parts where no one will ever find them.”
Venner's eyes shuttered over, darkening, though his smirk remained. “Such class,” he said. “Wherever did you get your manners, Miss Hayle?”
I'd show him manners. But before I could say or do anything further, Venner rose in a single graceful movement, a slip of paper falling on my tray.
“I'll see you at my lecture tomorrow morning,” he said as he drifted off. “Tardiness will not be accepted.”
I watched him go even as Charlotte lunged over my shoulder and retrieved the note. She didn't unfold it, just lifted it to her nose and sniffed. Her eyes flickered to wolf and back again before she growled in disgust.
“What?”
She handed me the paper, her wolf retreating. “No scent,” she said.
“Isn’t that kind of impossible?” Not to doubt her nose, but Charlotte’s was the keenest I’d ever come across.
Except. Except when it came to one person in particular. Ever since Harvard last year and the vampire incident, Charlotte’s sensitivity for my most hated enemy was left in the dark.
Charlotte held the note out to me and I accepted it from her, anxiety mixing with rising anger.
Two unfolds later and I had my confirmation no scent could mean only one thing.
I told you I knew about Liam.
See you on the Green.
A.
***
Chapter Eight
I ran all the way to Coven Hall, Charlotte right behind me, wanting to ride the veil, but hearing Mom's voice in my head, begging me to play it cool even as the terror I felt at Ameline's cryptic note drove spikes of panic through my chest.
The last time she'd contacted me about someone I cared about, I'd found my demon grandmother dead in her apartments and was accused of her murder. So I didn't think anyone would blame me for the blinding fear gripping me as I raced after Liam.
Only to crash into his back as he stopped to allow Tippy through the door ahead of him. Liam turned, frowning a little, hazel eyes flat as his strawberry blonde hair hung over his forehead. But his gaze lightened as though he only then realized I was there. He reached for me as I staggered, concern rising in his face in answer to what had to have been open terror on mine.
“Syd.” He hugged me gently before letting me go, the old Liam back again. Now that I knew Ameline was involved, I immediately suspected she had something to do with his actions this morning. “What's wrong?”
I touched his cheek with trembling fingers, feeling how cold and clammy he was, internally snorting at my last thought. Like she’d be so petty to try to turn Liam against me. I knew she had to have bigger fish to reel in. But his physical condition amped up my worry. “Are you feeling okay?”
He snuffled a little, nodding. “Just getting a cold,” he said. “I'm fine.”
A cold. Right. But when I tried to probe him with magic, he gently but firmly blocked me again.
“I'm fine, Syd,” he said. Smiled a little, the smile I—sigh—loved. “You worry too much, you know that?”
My fear level dropped a bit as he slung one arm around my shoulders, the familiar scent of earth and his laundry calming me.
Right.
We walked over the entry together, through the magic doorway to Coven Hall's main corridor. I waved at him as he left me, missing the warmth of his arm over my shoulder, wondering where his coldness from breakfast had gone, but happy it seemed to have passed. I watched as he moved through a door on his way to class, leaving me to stand there and fret over him before just making it through the closing portal to my own class before it sealed shut.
As hard as I tried to track Liam down all day, he evaded me, and I wondered if Tippy had something to do with it after all. She was nice enough in lab, chattering on about how amazing she'd be as my second, but the moment we were set free, she latched onto my Sidhe—friend?—and took off. And though I was sure she wouldn’t be so stupid to use magic on Liam, why else had he made such a sudden about face?
Because I’d been a jerk about his mom. Time to face the fact I could only reject him so many times, prod him and try to—gulp—control him in the name of keeping him safe before he’d had enough. Liam was sweet, kind and gentle. But even he had to have his limit.
Maybe I’d just hit it.
Misery, thy name is Syd.
After one last failed attempt
to talk to him, finding his dorm room empty that night and not wanting to think about the fact he was probably with—didn’t want to think about it—her, I found a seat on a bench at the edge of the Yard and tried to quell the returning fear squeezing my chest so tight I could barely breathe.
Power whooshed, air parting only feet from me, discharging a handful of black-robed Enforcers into the Yard. One of them turned, chocolate eyes meeting mine and, before I knew it, Quaid waved to the departing group and made his way toward me.
Just what I needed. A Quaid lecture.
My day would be complete.
At least he didn't dive into accusing me of looking for trouble right away. Nope. He lulled me into a false sense of security by frowning as he sat and taking my hand.
“You look like you need a shoulder,” he said.
Normally, this would cue tears and hopeless sobbing. At least, from the old me.
Okay, maybe for the new me, too. I felt my eyes prickle with tears, my throat tighten, but I held off, rigid and tense. To his credit, Quaid didn't pull away, sitting back with my hand still in his strong, warm one, letting his power out ever so gently to wrap around mine. My demon welcomed him, pulled him close as I fell back into the familiar circle of his arms.