by Gill, Tamara
Abby clutched at his shirt, unable to wipe the smile from her lips. “You’d really help me. Oh my gosh, thank you so much, Ben.” She kissed his cheek and he chuckled.
“You missed, lass. My mouth is in the middle of my face.”
“Enjoying yourself, I see.”
Abby’s laughter died on her lips at the sound of Aedan’s deadly tone. She stood quickly and looked at Ben. He stood slowly, seemingly unfazed, and yet his eyes looked wary.
“We were eating some lunch. You’re more than welcome to join us, if you like,” she said.
Aedan pinned Ben with a lethal gaze, and she shivered.
“What is really going on here? Explain. Now.” Aedan placed his hand on the hilt of his sword and fear crept up her spine.
“Nothing, Aedan. We were just eating.”
“It looked like more than eating.” He did look at her then and she shrugged, not knowing what else to do. “If you’re accusing me and Ben of an illicit affair, you’re being an ass.”
“Ass? I watched ye kiss the man.”
A muscle worked in his jaw and Abby wanted to go to him, reassure him, and yet the thought of Aline halted her steps. “And in only a week or so I’ll watch you marry Aline. Seems like a fair trade off.”
“I’ll leave ye two alone.” Ben went to leave and Aedan pushed him back toward her. Abby grabbed his arm to steady him, which she didn’t do a very good job of when she stumbled instead.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing, Aedan?” She righted herself, glaring at him.
Ben smiled before letting out a roar and charging Aedan. Shocked mute by the sight of Aedan and Ben pummelling each other, rolling all over the ground, it took Abby a couple of seconds to realize she should do something.
“Stop!” She attempted to pull Ben back, but only managed to fall over as Aedan rolled Ben under himself and started thumping him with sickening thuds.
“Aedan, stop!” But they didn’t, just continued to brawl on the ground. Looking about for a container, she spotted the basket. It wasn’t waterproof, but it would hold water for a little while. She ran the short distance to the river and filled it, coming back to the fighting men and dumping the full basket of water on their idiot heads.
They gasped, pulled apart, and glared at her.
“What did ye do that for?” Aedan’s chest rose and fell with labored breaths, and she tore her attention away from the magnetic sight.
“Why do you think? You’re acting like medieval morons.”
“I think the Laird of Druiminn is jealous. Ye can’t have all the women, boy.”
“You’ll not have her,” Aedan roared, startling her.
Ben stood without saying a word, and left.
She glared at Aedan, wanting to throttle him herself. “Get up.”
He did, clasping his stomach as he did so. “What,” he asked at length when she didn’t say anything.
“What are you doing? You can’t fight your closest friend for something he’s innocent of.”
“It didn’t look innocent to me, lass. Do ye want him now?”
Abby strode up to him and slapped his face. Hard. His eyes narrowed, but he didn’t react. “If I wanted Ben, I’d have Ben. You have Aline, after all. But I want you, Aedan, and I can’t have you. Is that what you want to hear? Because it’s true. I think of you all the time. The thought of you while I was away, the hope that I would see you again, was all that kept me sane.”
She paced, trying to calm down. “You know that I had a boyfriend, a lover in my time? I thought I’d marry him, have children with him, but I buried him, instead. He was a cop, a peacekeeper, and the job killed him. Just like one day, this job of yours, your position as laird, could kill you.”
His eyes clouded with jealousy but also a flicker of compassion. “What are ye trying to say?”
“I didn’t have to come back, you know. I could’ve kept my heart protected from the pain of losing someone I love by death, illness, whatever, but I didn’t. Life is nothing without love.” Tears welled in her eyes and she sniffed. “And, what do I come back to? You. Engaged to Aline, of all women.”
“I dinna think ye could come back. What did ye want me to do? Stay a saint for the rest of my life? I have to have heirs.”
“Why didn’t you ask Gwen to do”—she waved her arms about—“something!” She growled, wanting to hit something. “I’m so pissed off with you right now; nothing you say can change the fact that you couldn’t even wait a year to move on.”
“I was told within weeks of ye leaving that ye couldn’t be returned. What was I supposed to do?” He ran a hand through his long locks, cursing in a language she couldn’t understand. “I died when I knew I’d never see ye again. What did it matter who I married after that?”
“That may be so, but twelve months! Probably sooner, since you had to court her.”
He shook his head, stepping back. “I’m sorry, lass. I canna say any more than that.”
“No, you can’t.” Abby swiped a tear from her cheek and looked out over the serene water, hoping it would help her calm down a little. “It’s over, Aedan. Do what you want, marry whoever the hell you want. I can’t allow myself to care anymore.”
He clasped her arm, pulling her around to face him. “Ye can’t allow yourself to care, or you don’t care?”
His eyes burned into her soul, and she knew he’d gathered the answer before she spoke. “I can’t.”
“Lass…”
She placed her hand on his lips, stopping him from kissing her. “Don’t you dare, Aedan.”
“Why not?” Anguish tinged his voice.
“Why do you think? I don’t trust myself around you.” Abby pushed him away, gathered up what remained of her picnic, and held the basket before her in a pathetic attempt at a barrier. “I won’t become the other woman, not even for you. Aline and I deserve better than that.”
“What do ye plan on doing?”
“I’m leaving with Gwen, and maybe I’ll marry eventually, or go back to my own time when I can.” She shrugged. “Who knows?”
His eyes burned with hatred. At her or her words, she couldn’t be sure.
Abby started back toward the castle, leaving Aedan under the tree. It was better this way. She couldn’t be around him without wanting to give in to desires that she no longer had the right to feel.
He was as lost to her now as he had been when centuries separated them.
...
Aedan stormed into Black Ben’s chamber, slamming the door behind him. Ben sat before the fire, one eyebrow raised in amusement. “Come in.”
“You stay the hell away from Abigail. She’s not for you.” His friend laughed, and a red haze dropped over his vision. He’d kill him.
“And she’s not for ye, either, since you’ve decided to marry Aline.” Ben took a sip of mead. “Sit.”
Aedan slunk down in the opposite chair and swore, running a hand over his face, wishing he could undo his decisions of the past few months. “What am I going to do?”
“You’ll marry Aline, of course. What else can you do?”
Nothing… He gritted his teeth, wondering how fate could play such an unfair game with his life. “I didn’t think I’d ever see Abigail again. Had I even thought it was a possibility, I would’ve never signed an agreement with Clan Grant.”
“I sought out Gwen and she explained everything that’s happened here these last few weeks. I happened to run into Abigail. I didn’t seek her out, if ye were wondering.” Ben met his gaze square on. “She’s a friend and nothing more. No matter how bonny I think the lass, ye are my friend first and foremost.”
“Thank ye.” Aedan reached over to the little table before their feet and poured himself a cup of mead and took a sip. “When I saw—”
“Abigail kissing me you went into a rage? How are ye going to marry another when ye have such strong feelings toward the lass? The marriage will be a disaster. You’ll eventually despise Aline for being herself, and she’ll h
ate you for ruining her life. Ye canna go through with it.”
“To pull out now would cause another clan war, and I can’t do that to my people. We’re still healing after the battle with O’Cain.” But damn it he wanted to. To hell with everyone else’s expectations, the alliances—everything. He would go to war with everyone if it meant he could keep the woman he loved.
Ben cleared his throat, grinning. “I may have a solution.”
Aedan snapped his head up, willing to hear anything, if it meant he could possibly have Abigail back. “What is it?”
“I’ll seduce your betrothed. One night in my bed and she’ll not look in your direction again.”
“I canna ask for ye to do such a thing.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I cannot marry Aline. I will go to Laird Grant when he returns and declare my intentions. What will happen after that I do not know, but I’ll be prepared for anything.”
“My offer stands. You have saved my life more than once, ’tis time I repaid the debt. I’ll seduce the lass and she’ll never look in ye direction again.”
Aedan laughed. “You’re more ballsy than my male Highland heifers. What makes ye think she’ll fall into your bed so easily?”
Ben looked sheepish. “Let’s just say Aline Grant and I have some unfinished business from when we were staying here last.”
Aedan sat up. “You’ve seduced her already?”
“Nay.” Ben shook his head, frowning. “But after watching the woman and her viciousness, I was intrigued to know if she was always so vile. I found that she was not, not when kissed within an inch of her life, at least.”
For a moment speech was impossible, followed by a grain of hope. “Do ye want my permission?”
“It wouldn’t hurt. No one need know any of this, and think of it as a pre-wedding gift. Of course, ye know I’m speaking of your wedding with the delectable Abigail.”
“Dinna push our friendship, Ben,” Aedan said, only half joking. Delectable and Abigail were thoughts only he was allowed to have. To have the woman he loved more than life itself back in his arms, to feel her soft skin, smell her delicious scent, sent fire through his veins. “If ye seduce Aline, you’ll have to marry the lass. Are ye willing to do that?”
Ben shrugged, seemingly unfazed. “I need a wife, and although Aline seems verbally potent with most people, on her own she’s a different lass. I’ll keep her so occupied that she’ll never feel jaded with her life again.”
“High praise for yourself.” Aedan laughed. “I suppose I should apologize for earlier.”
“Aye, and so should I.”
Aedan stood. “Whether ye seduce the lass or not, I will be going to her father and telling him that the marriage will nay be going ahead. As much as I appreciate yer friendship and what ye are willing to do for me ’tis unnecessary. Do think on ye choice before ye take the lass as yer own.”
“Aye, I’ll think on ye words,” Ben said, catching his gaze.
“Ye are a true friend, and a man I’ll be forever indebted to, no matter what you do.”
Ben smirked, raising his goblet in salute. “Dinna forget it, lad.”
Aedan laughed as he left, closing the door behind him. He never would.
Chapter Twenty-Four
The next day something odd was happening. After the initial summons into Aline’s room for the woman to rub the engagement in Abby’s face, a distance had sprung up between the betrothed couple. Certainly, it didn’t seem like Aline was seeking out Aedan for pre-marital sex. There was no flirting, hot glances. In fact, it looked like nothing could be further from their thoughts, if Aedan had ever thought along those lines in the first place.
And as Abby had asked, Aedan held up his end of the bargain and kept away from her. He spoke, of course, wished her good morning and good night, but other than that, they didn’t spend any time together. It was what she wanted, or certainly, what she needed, but it didn’t change the fact their separation, when being so close in a physical sense, hurt like hell.
She missed him…
Keeping away from him wasn’t easy, either, especially when she caught him watching her, his dark hooded eyes that sparked sin and beckoned her to jump into the shoes of “the other” woman all but called her over.
And she so wanted to go…
No.
Abby bit into a chicken leg and listened to the idle talk between Gwen and Braxton. Tonight they were seated at the dais, Aedan and Aline quiet in the middle of the table, neither one venturing to speak to their clans or family seated beside them. Black Ben, seated out with the clansmen, seemed solemn as well.
Seated to one end, Abby knew she couldn’t let what she suspected was going on between the once close friends continue. Aedan and Ben were friends. What had happened on the day of her picnic should not ruin a lifelong friendship.
Especially when nothing had happened. She liked Ben. He was a nice guy, but he’d never turned her head. Only one Highlander had managed that, even if he was no longer hers.
Music commenced up on the gallery overlooking the hall and Gwen stood, holding her babe. “I’m retiring for the night, Abigail. It’s been a long day, and I’m not feeling up to dancing this eve.”
“Are ye okay?” Aedan turned to his sister, noting her distress. Their eyes met briefly and butterflies took flight in her stomach.
“Aye. I’m fine. Just tired. I’ll see you in the morn.”
“Good night.” Abby finished her wine, leaning back in her chair and watching as Braxton escorted his wife away. A smile lifted her lips at seeing how he doted on her. How lucky Gwen was to find love in a time when marriages were looked upon as a means for more power, land, or money.
Aedan’s and Aline’s a prime example.
Out of the corner of her eye, she heard Black Ben ask Aline to dance. They joined the other couples and for the first time, she noticed Aline letting her guard down and enjoying herself.
Aedan shifted to sit beside her and the pull of him, the need to turn and be wrapped up in his comforting embrace was a physical struggle to ignore.
She could feel the heat of his gaze on her face and she steadfastly refused to meet his eyes. He cleared his throat and leaned back in his chair.
“You’re ignoring me.” It wasn’t a question.
“Not really,” she said, flicking him a quick glance. “This will be easier if we stay away from each other.”
His hand moved down between them and stroked the underside of her arm. Shivers skittered across her skin and warmth pooled at her core. Abby swallowed, gathering her wits. “Don’t do that.”
“I miss ye.”
His deep, gravelly tone was almost enough to make her forget honor. “I miss you, as well, but missing each other doesn’t change anything.” Abby sat forward, pulling her arm out of his reach. She met his gaze and held it. “You made your choice. Now you must live with it.”
“My choice would’ve been different had I known Gwen’s alternative.” He leaned over the table, their shoulders bumping. “I love ye.”
“I know.” Abby looked out to the dance floor and caught Ben’s eye when he winked. What is he up to? “I’m retiring as well.” She turned to face him. “Maybe you and I weren’t meant to happen.”
“Yer talking pish. Had the Laird of Grant not returned to his holdings for a few days, our lives would be different. I promise I will fix this so we can be together.”
Abby stood, throwing her hands up in the air. “I don’t know what you want, Aedan. You’re betrothed to another. I’m not going to sleep with you. I’m not going to do anything with you, so leave me alone,” she whispered as loudly as she could.
He made a low growling noise before standing, knocking his chair over. Some of the clan looked to see what was going on and she pasted on a pleasant smile to ease their concern. She swallowed at the wild, untamed look in Aedan’s eyes as he pulled her to the side of the room. Large wooden pillars ran the length of the wall, giving them privacy.
He pinned her again
st the wall, the cold stone at her back firing her blood. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
“I’m going to tell the Laird of Grant that I’ll not marry his daughter, no matter if my words cause another clan battle. I’ll not live without ye. Now damn well kiss me, lass, one last time, in case he puts a sword through my gullet after my declaration.”
Abby placed her hand on his chest to stop him from advancing. She cursed her stupid body for wanting to do as he asked. The thought of his mouth on hers, to feel the delicious slide of his tongue against her own. She bit her lip, fighting the emotions he’d always sparked. Damn it. “Are you really going to break your betrothal with Aline?”
“Aye. There is no choice. I canna live without ye.”
“You’re the devil.” And Heaven all wrapped into one.
A slight smile lifted his lips. “Then jump into Hell with me.”
Her hand fisted about his shirt, pulling him against her. Their kiss wasn’t a sweet, beckoning, tempting embrace, but an inferno that would make Lucifer proud.
He took her mouth hard, lips, teeth, tongue meshed, demanding, both trying to control the other. Abby moaned, her body after weeks of feeling lifeless, sparked to life with renewed energy. Her hand wrapped about his nape, the action pulling him fully against her.
His hardness pushed against her stomach, and her core thrummed with need. He pulled back, kissing her chin, her neck. “I choose you. I want you,” he whispered.
The words acted like a cold bucket of water. Abby stilled, pushing him out of her arms. “I think that’s a fair farewell kiss, until you do as you say.”
Pain flickered through his gaze, but he nodded, allowing her to go. “I will do as I say.” He bowed. “Good night, Abigail.”
Abby walked from the room, looking to see if anyone had seen them in the darkened alcove. No one seemed to be looking their way, and she couldn’t spot Ben or Aline. Guilt pierced her soul over her actions and tears pooled in her eyes. She’d promised not to touch him, but then he had said the most wonderful thing. He would be hers in only a matter of days. Or sooner, she hoped.