by Ruby Madden
“Enlighten me.” Day replied sarcastically. Her shyness gone in the face of his continual taunting.
“You are technically flawless. I’d heard from other faculty members, how well you play. But they all agree on one point, and so do I. You lack passion. You lack fire.” He said with the type of passion she was apparently needing.
Day looked down at the floor, her timid side reappearing. Rhys squatted down in front of her and used an index finger to lift her chin. Tears clung to her bottom lids and his next words made them spill onto her round cheeks.
“You have the potential to be one of the best cellists in the world. But you hold in all your emotions when playing is the one time you should let it all out.” Rhys said gently as if she’d break. “Now…what’s going on in your life that has you wound up like a top?”
Embarrassed, Day wiped at her tear-streaked face. At his nod of encouragement and sympathetic dark blue eyes, Day spoke.
“It’s my boyfriend.” She took in a shuddering breath and continued. “He lost his mom last year and it’s affecting him badly. He drinks all the time, he’s angry, and he won’t talk to me.”
“I’m sorry that you’re going through this rough time, Daylen. And I believe that you deserve better. But don’t you see…you can use that hurt to your advantage?” Rhys reached for her hands and clutched them tightly. “Les Miz is tragic and heartbreaking. Take your anger, frustration, and sorrow and put it into every note that you play. Let all that emotion radiate out into your fingertips till you bleed onto that damned cello. And I bet, if you leave it all here…” he touched the cello lightly. “…you’ll feel like you’ve unloaded a whole heap of weight off your shoulders.”
Day nodded her assent. “Okay,” she spoke softly.
Rhys stood up and looked down at her. “Again.”
Daylen positioned her fingers on the chords and placed the bow lightly on the strings below. She closed her eyes and felt all her anger and frustration still sitting on her chest, making it hard to breathe. This time, though, instead of trying to push it down. She let it spill over. She let it radiate throughout her whole body, and she began to play.
At the right moments, the fine horsehair of the bow attacked the strings or caressed them like a lover. Like she once did when she would lie in bed with Chase. She was so lost in the refuse that poured out of her that she didn’t see Rhys pacing around her. Nor did she hear him speak.
“Yes!” Rhys clenched his fists as he listened to her play. “Dig deep, Daylen. Perfect!”
He continued to coax and cheer her on as she played though she didn’t hear much of it. Day came to the end of the piece and practically collapsed after she pulled the bow along the last note. She felt drained.
“That was bloody brilliant, Daylen!” Rhys exclaimed and grabbed her shoulders, giving her a little shake.
“Thanks. I feel like I’ve been through battle.” Day sighed. Worn but happy.
“You did go through battle. And it was exquisite.” Rhys said softly.
Day’s coffee brown eyes met his deep cobalt blue ones. They stared at each other for a few awkward beats too long. Rhys straightened back up and cleared his throat.
“Pain isn’t always ugly. Messy, maybe. But it can be beautiful. It lets you know that you’re still alive. And it has its uses. Like making extraordinary music. Why do you think Beethoven is still discussed today? You have to be a little mad, when you’re an artist. Madness is a prerequisite for the job, I think.” Rhys grinned and winked at her.
Daylen stared up at him, as if in a trance. He was older and wiser. He was devilishly handsome and crazy passionate about music. She felt like she could listen to him talk about music for hours and the accent didn’t hurt. But the awkward silence, shook Day from her reverie.
“That was really insightful. I never really thought of it that way.” Day remarked.
“It’s okay. I’ve been doing this a bit longer than you.” He shrugged. “Anyway, I’m sorry that I was a bit of a wanker to you today. I just knew that you had it in you to be great. And you were.” Rhys said earnestly.
“Thank you. As pissed off as I was, I’m glad you did it now.” Day smiled shyly.
“Good.” Rhys nodded and slid his hands into his pockets. The move wasn’t unsure like when Chase did it. With Rhys, it was a relaxed and self-assured pose. Very adult. And very sexy. “I think you’ve earned a break for the day. I think we’re all done here.”
Day mentally shook herself and began to pack up her cello and bow. While Rhys busied himself with shuffling sheet music.
“Alright. Well…I guess I’ll see you tomorrow.” Day said as she gripped the shoulder strap to her cello case.
“Until then,” Rhys said deeply before she slipped through the door.
Daylen quickly walked outside into the chilly spring air. She raised her face up, to let the cold wind smack some sense into her. You can’t have a crush on your conductor, ya big dope! Besides, he’s older and way more sophisticated than you could ever be. Oh, and you have a BOYFRIEND! She rolled her eyes at herself and began to walk towards home.
She didn’t see the blue eyes watching her from the office window.
~~~
The next couple of weeks, Day continued to do well under the direction of Rhys. Most days when they were finished with ensemble or section practices, she was exhausted. When she put all of her emotions in whatever piece from the musical they were practicing, she was emotionally, mentally, and physically drained by the end. There were days that she just couldn’t put it all out there, so she held back, but Rhys instantly noticed and took her to task for it. Day was ready to strangle him with her horse hairs.
The symphony was just wrapping up another grueling practice, only a few weeks before the musical’s opening and finals. Day and Amy were heading off the stage when Rhys called out to her.
“Daylen! I need you to stay after for a few minutes,” he said.
“I’ll meet up with you at the student center.” Day said to Amy.
The rest of the orchestra students gave her curious looks, as they made their way out of the conservatory. After everyone had gone, Rhys pointed to a chair and she sat as he straddled the one in front of hers. A packet if papers in his hands.
“I know it's late notice, but I wanted to talk to you about your plans after college.” Rhys began. He continued at Day’s blank stare. “What are they?”
“Uh…I was going to audition for a cellist spot in the Chicago Symphony.” Day answered.
“You’re not ready,” Rhys said bluntly.
“Oh…”
“Don’t get all down on yourself. I didn’t say, you’re not good enough. I said you’re not ready.” Rhys explained.
“Okay, then what?” Daylen asked in frustration.
“More schooling. Maybe a master’s program? But maybe not here.” Rhys hinted.
“What do you mean?” She asked, truly perplexed.
“I’m a guest conductor here, but my normal residency is at the Royal College of Music in London. I think you’d do well in the master’s program there. And honestly, I feel that I need more time mentoring you. I’m arrogant enough to say that I don’t trust your growth in the hands of someone else.” Rhys quirked up a dark eyebrow.
“I don’t know, Rhys.” Day responded softly though her heart was pounding. Could she really just up and leave to go to another country on the other side of the world? What about Chase? “Shouldn’t I have applied already? What about an audition? I mean, I don’t even have a passport.”
“I’m an instructor there. Don’t you think I could grease a few wheels to get you in? As far as I’m concerned, you’ve already auditioned with me. And we can get you a passport in plenty of time. It’s up to you, but you would have to let me know soon.” Rhys suggested as he handed her the papers he’d been holding. “Here’s the application. You can fill it out and turn it into me. Just to see if you get accepted, and then you can decide fro
m there.”
“A-Alright. I’ll think about it.” Day said, taking the application and feeling overwhelmed.
Rhys stared at her for a few uncomfortable beats and then pushed off from his chair.
“I hope you do,” he said deeply.
Day swallowed, grabbed her cello, and hightailed it out of the conservatory.
~~~
“So what did Conductor Melt-in-my-Mouth Reese’s Pieces say?” Amy asked curiously as Day sat down with her food.
Daylen had caught up with her friend in the student center to have a late lunch, before their next class. Of course, Amy was primed and ready for the Spanish Inquisition.
“First of all, I think that was M&M’s line, not Reese’s.” Day gave her friend a look.
“Whatever. You know what I mean. So what did he want?” Amy pressed.
“He asked what my plans were after graduation.” Daylen hedged.
“And?” Amy leaned forward in her chair.
“And I told him that I wanted to audition for the Chicago Symphony.”
“Go on.” Amy leaned in closer.
“And he said I wasn’t ready.” Daylen shrugged.
“That’s it? That’s all he said?” Amy gave her a knowing look.
“Well, then he said that he thought I’d benefit from getting my masters. At the Royal College of Music…in London…mentored by him.” Day eased out slowly.
Amy’s mouth dropped open in shock.
“You’re shittin’ me?!” She shouted out.
Everyone turned and looked at them curiously. Daylen ducked her head in embarrassment.
“Do you have to be so loud? Not everyone needs to know my business.” Day hissed under her breath.
“Sorry.” Amy cringed. “It’s just that this is a huge opportunity for you. Are you gonna do it? I would in a heartbeat if he asked me.” Amy nearly bounced in her seat.
“Really? Even though that would take you thousands of miles away from Jake?” Day asked doubtfully.
“I mean, it wouldn’t be easy. But it’s the chance of a lifetime. I don’t know if Jake and I will spend the rest of our lives together. But I know that I want to play flute for the rest of my life, or until I’m too old to play. Why give up a sure thing…your dream, for a maybe?” Amy said.
“I think that’s the deepest thing I’ve ever heard you say.” Day said in amazement.
“I have my moments.” Amy shrugged her shoulders nonchalantly. “But you and Chase are having problems right now. He needs to get his shit together and stop using you as a crutch. And you need to find your own life. One that doesn’t revolve around trying to make him happy, which isn’t working, by the way.” Amy reached across the table to clutch Day’s hand when tears came to her eyes. “You can’t heal him, sweetie. He has to want to do that on his own.”
“But this is different.” Day sniffled. “He’s not just my boyfriend. He’s my best friend. No offense.” Day wiped her eyes.
“None taken. I know you have a bond that goes way back. But even best friends go off to live their own lives. And like most true best friends, they’ll more than likely be there when you get back. Just maybe not in a relationship.” Amy advised.
Day sighed heavily. “I just don’t know. But I told Rhys that I’d think about it. And he gave me the application to fill out.”
“You really should. I just want to see you happy. And you haven’t been for a year. Hell, even before that when you were dating Drew. Stop trying to make these guys happy. Focus on you and make yourself happy. You have that right.” Amy added passionately. “Just fill it out and see if you get accepted. Then make your decision afterwards.”
Daylen nodded, deep in thought. She was already making a list of pros and cons in her head. The longer the pros’ list got, the heavier her heart felt. Could she really leave Chase? That’s the million dollar question, she thought as she pulled out the application and a pen.
Chapter 24
It was opening night of the college’s production of Les Miz, and Chase could tell that Day was a nervous wreck as she ran around getting ready. He thought she looked gorgeous anyway. She wore a sleeveless, black dress that swept at her heeled feet. Its plunging neckline displayed her lush, creamy breasts. Her jet black hair was pulled back into a messy chignon at the back of her neck. Her bangs fell past her arched brows, drawing attention to her lined, dark eyes. The longer tendrils on either side framed her face and rosy cheeks.
“You look gorgeous, as always,” Chase said deeply.
He leaned against the doorway to the bathroom and they looked at each other through their reflections in the mirror.
“Thanks, Chase.” Day flushed shyly. Something she did that he’d always love, even when they were old and gray. “You look good no matter what you wear, but especially when you wear a suit.”
“Thank you,” Chase said, looking down at his black suit and ice blue tie.
Silence strained between them, and Chase longed for the times when the banter between them was effortless and comfortable. He knew it was all his fault, but he found that owning up to his mistakes and flaws, proved harder than he thought. His pride and his need to forget and to ease his pain through alcohol were easier to hold on to. He was lucky that his team had even decided to keep him, with all of the shit he’d pulled. Though tonight, he was on a mission to be on his best behavior for Day.
“Are you ready?” He asked.
“As I’ll ever be,” she sighed.
Day turned and moved to walk past him. Chase reached out a hand and placed it on her soft tummy, stopping her. He bent his head down and placed his lips against her temple. Chase kissed her softly there.
“I love you, Pretty Day,” He whispered.
Day’s shoulders slumped slightly, as if some of the tension she held there, eased just a bit.
“I love you, too,” She said huskily as if she was on the verge of tears.
As they walked out the condo, Chase swallowed down his guilt at causing her so much pain.
~~~
The senior symphony orchestra sat in the pit of the conservatory. Their backs straight and instruments at the ready. Day took a calming breath and looked to their conductor, waiting for the cue to begin. Rhys stood at his podium, looking dashing in his tuxes and tails. He raised his arms, baton in hand. His dark blue eyes scanned them from left to right, making sure he had their attention. His eyes landed on Day and held her gaze for a few beats, before moving back to the center.
The previous week, Rhys had told Day that she’d been accepted into the Master’s program at the Royal College of Music. She still hadn’t told Chase or even her mother. Just applying had felt like a betrayal to Chase and she felt the guilt weighing her down. She hadn’t even talked to him about it yet. Nor had she decided she was even going, though she knew Rhys was waiting for her verdict.
Day shook her head to clear her mind of all the negativity and doubts and focused her eyes on Rhys once more. His arms were poised, ready to begin the show. Then his arms swept down and out, and they were off.
The actors above and the orchestra below became one for the next two hours and fifty-five minutes. During the intermission, they all wiped at their brows, took a much-needed drink, and flexed and stretched their aching muscles, preparing for the second half. All in all, Day was amazed at how quickly the show went. She was so absorbed in the music, time seemed to disappear. It was literally otherworldly, and by the sounds of the cheering audience, they must have been transported as well.
They all smiled at each other, giddy at their successful first performance. Day looked over at Amy and she cheesed back at her. She then happened a glance at Rhys and his eyes were already on her. Her stomach involuntarily flip-flopped. He inclined his head once, in a sign of approval for her performance. Day smiled back shyly and stood up with everyone else, as they all took a collective bow.
~~~
Chase and Pat found Daylen in the lobby of the cons
ervatory with the other orchestra members and the cast of the musical. Chase noticed that an older good looking man was talking a little too closely to Day. Instantly, his blood started to boil as they walked up.
“So did you think any more about going?” Chase caught the man say.
“No, but I’ll decide soon.” Day said quietly and Chase furrowed his brow, wondering what that could be about.
Daylen saw Chase and her mom standing there and took a few steps back from the man. She smiled brightly, even though it didn’t reach her eyes. It hadn’t in a long time.
“Hi, mom. Hey, Chase.” Day greeted them.
Pat wrapped Day in a warm hug. “You did a wonderful job. I mean, I couldn’t always hear you specifically, but the entire show was Broadway worthy.” Pat grinned at her.
“Thanks, mom.” Day flushed at the praise.
“Yeah. Ya done good, Pretty Day.” Chase replaced Pat’s warm embrace, though it was stiff. “Who’s this?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. That was rude of me.” Day pulled away and nervously began introductions. “Chase. Mom. This is our guest conductor for the semester, Rhys Spencer-Hamilton. Rhys this is my mom Pat Daniels and my boyfriend, Chase McCoy.”
“It’s pleasure to make your acquaintance,” Rhys said, his accent flowing out warmly.
“Oh, you’re British.” Pat tittered as she shook hands with Rhys. Both Day and Chase stared at her in shock. They both realized at the same time that Pat was a sucker for an accent.
“Nice to meet you, man,” Chase said insincerely as he shook hands with Rhys. “So, what exactly haven’t you decided on?” Chase looked from Day to Rhys, curiously.
“Oh, just if I’m gonna decide to go on and get my masters.” Day said quickly. Too quickly. Chase sensed there was more to it than that, but he didn’t push the subject. “So, there’s an opening night celebratory party going on at an apartment over in Lincoln Park that we’re all going to. Wanna go?” Day asked Chase.