by Linzi Basset
Chloe startled. It was another habit that had gone wayside since her return. She had no intention of admitting that to her perceptive friend, so she shrugged negligently.
“You hardly gave me any time to get home, let alone put on some music.”
“Pfft, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Yeah, says the one who threatened me with the demon from hell.”
Shona laughed. “Come now, Chloe. Mitch has never done anything to you and besides, once you get to know him better, he’s a nice guy.”
“Really? I guess the woman who cursed his black soul when he made her wear a vibrator for an entire day, wasn’t you?”
Shona’s cheeks bloomed red. She sipped from the glass Chloe handed her as they settled in front of the blazing fire Chloe had just lit in the den. “Well, he made up for it that night.”
“Hm, that would be the day you could barely walk?”
She laughed. “Mitch takes making up very seriously. Besides, you didn’t hear me complain, did you?”
“How’re Diana and the babies?”
“They’re fine. She says they miss you. I’m not so sure how she figures that, but she’s their mother, she would know.”
“And—”
“Enough, Chloe. You’re not gonna avoid talking to me. So, tell me. What’s going on? You’ve lost weight and do not tell me you could afford to.”
Chloe didn’t even bother to deny it. She knew she’d lost too much weight and lost her sparkle on top of that. To be frank, she looked worn and tired, but Shona was too polite to say it.
Chloe opened her mouth to talk and was shocked when she burst into tears instead. Big, gulping sobs.
“Oh, my goodness! This is worse than I thought,” Shona exclaimed. This was the second time she witnessed her cry since Trent’s death and so unlike Chloe. She rushed over to her and wrapped her arms around her shoulders. “There now, I’m here. Shh, it’s all going to be alright, love.”
That just made Chloe cry harder. “That’s what he . . . hiccup . . . called me. L-love,” she wailed and the sobs became raw and broken. “I fucked up so badly, Shona,” she said through the tears. “And I miss them. Oh, god, I miss him! I miss him so much.”
“I know, darling.” Shona tried to soothe her but nothing she said or did seemed to do the trick. Chloe just became more distressed.
“How did it happen, Shona? How could I have fallen in love so quickly and so deeply? He . . . hiccup . . . I love him more,” she glanced at Shona through her teary eyes, “you know, than I did Trent. How could I have been so stupid? So fucking blind? Now it’s too late. He’ll . . . hiccup . . . they’ll never forgive me,” she wailed and turned into Shona’s chest in an effort to stay the tears.
“Never is a long time and besides, I’ve never known you to just give up. Do you believe you have a future with them, Chloe? With Rex?”
Chloe made a concerted effort to bring her emotions under control. She wiped her cheeks dry, nodding sadly.
“I’m not living, Shona, I’m merely existing. I can’t go on like this. My life is empty; it feels like I’m scrambling through one worthless day after another since I came back. It’s useless to deny it any longer. I need him in my life. I know that now. He’s the one who broke through the barriers around my heart.”
“But he comes with two others, Chloe. Don’t forget that.”
“I know that and it scares me even more; that I love them too. How, Shona? You know me. I can’t love all three of them. I don’t have it in me.”
“We can’t tell our hearts who to love. In our life time, we learn to love many people in many ways. It doesn’t mean you love one more than the other, Chloe. You just love them differently. You were still so young when you fell in love with Trent. What you have with the three of them now, doesn’t diminish what you had with Trent. It only means your life has come full circle, in a way.” Shona hesitated. “We never told you this and I’m not so sure . . .”
Chloe felt her heart slow down at the look on Shona’s face.
“Tell me what?”
“That day you went after Mark, Rex made it clear that should Rex and Mark choose you, he’ll walk away.”
“But . . .” she stuttered, shock churning her stomach in wild tumbles.
“He said he’d sell his ranch shares to them. Chloe, you have to be sure about this.”
“I love them, Shona. But . . . oh god, he said that? That he’d walk away?”
Shona got up and pulled Chloe behind her toward the bathroom. She made her to sit on the toilet seat.
“I think you need a hot bubble bath and one of my famous head massages. Once that’s done, you’ll feel better and we’ll strategize. You were there for Diana and me. Now, it’s our turn and make no mistake girl, one way or another, we’ll find a way to get the four of you back together.”
Shona opened the taps and added Chloe’s favorite orchid bubble bath in the running water, mumbling under her breath, “If we can find out where the hell Rex had disappeared to.”
“What did you say?”
“I said, the water is nice and hot. Come on, darling, get undressed and into the tub. It’s Shona magic time!”
Chapter Fifteen
Chloe knew the exhibition was being hosted at the Berggruen Gallery on Hawthorne Street. The gallery was founded in the mid-seventies and was known for exhibiting many best sought-after artists. Everyone had been after John J to exhibit his work. This was a major scoop.
The place was already packed with people by the time they arrived.
“You know, this place looks exactly like it did, oh gosh, five years ago? I can’t believe it’s been that long since I’ve been here.”
“Yes, we came for Ellsworth Kelly and Alexander Calder’s shows, didn’t we?”
“Exhibitions, Shona. This is art, not some music production,” Chloe corrected automatically, as they made their way through groups of people entering the exhibition halls. Curiosity was rife. Everyone wanted to meet the eccentric artist.
Shona and Chloe helped themselves with some champagne and sipped leisurely, as they strolled closer to artwork. John J was one of the few artists who didn’t limit himself to one pattern. He was a contemporary artist and used mixed media in a unique way. He did charcoal, water colors and even oils. Lot of them were on display today.
“Did Kade mention whether John J will be here today?”
Shona had a faraway look in her eyes, deep in thought. She shook her head.
“No, he didn’t and to be honest, I didn’t ask. Oh, my. I love this painting,” she exclaimed as they observed an oil painting of a country side. There was a long and lonely road. A cattleman was sitting astride his horse, playing a flute. The artist had used brilliant brush strokes to bring the golden prairie fields alive. The sky was painted brilliantly with a flock of birds in flight, heading for the mountains
Chloe’s knees began to tremble. She gulped in a deep breath.
“I remember this day. He said . . .,” she swallowed hard, “He said that old man Harry learned to play the flute when he was three years old. Have you met him yet, Shona?”
Shona stared at Chloe before she turned her attention back to the painting. Her hand rose to cover her mouth.
“My god! I don’t believe it. That looks like . . . it is! It’s our mountain! And that is Harry! How is it possible?” Shona glanced around. “I don’t recognize anyone from around Tucson here.”
They wandered to the next painting and one after, Chloe started trembling. She recognized every scene. She was there. It was a tribute to her visit to the Golden Circle Ranch.
“What is this exhibition called?” She managed to croak.
Shona glanced at the pamphlet in her hand. “It’s called . . . oh fuck me, Chloe? Do you think . . .?”
“What? Tell me, Shona.”
“It’s called My World Through the Eyes of An Angel.”
Her breathing became shallow. It’s what he called me. She began walking, fervently going fr
om one painting to the next, until she came across a room marked, For private viewing only. She didn’t hesitate and pushed through the door, Shona on her heels.
“Wow! That is the most sensual painting I’ve ever seen. Not to mention an expression of love.” Shona stared in awe at the life size painting.
“It’s him. Don’t you see, Shona?”
“Who?” she asked absently, still enraptured by the painting.
“John J. Mark John Jackson. It has to be him. This . . . happened that first night on the mountain, at the camp site.”
Shona looked at Chloe, who was on the verge of collapsing. Her arms were wrapped around her waist and she slowly sank to the floor, her eyes glued to the image of the naked woman bound spread-eagled to a tree, against the background of the setting sun, casting an ethereal light on her.
But what made her heart jump, was the depth of the emotion in the woman’s face—her face—as she beseechingly stared toward the artist. This was how he’d seen her, painted her, silently begging them to love her, even before she’d realized how much she needed them in her life.
“Angel,” Mark’s gruff voice registered on Chloe.
“You’re here,” she said, gulping in a deep breath but was too scared to turn around. The last time she’d seen him there had been disappointment and anger in his emerald green eyes.
The hum of the people in the adjacent room dimmed to the background. His hands folded around her shoulders and dragged her up from the floor. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed his hard chest against her back.
She leaned her head on his shoulder and turned her face to bury it in his throat. His familiar smell filtered through her senses and for the first time in months, she relaxed. Her body accepted his strength.
“This is how I remember you, angel. This expression on your face . . . was I wrong? Were we wrong in what we saw there?”
“No, you weren’t. I’m so sorry for being such a coward. I shouldn’t have left—not the way I did . . .”
“You ran away from your emotions, baby. It took us time to get over the disappointment and anger, but once Mark painted that picture, we knew. We’re not going to allow you to bury yourself in the grave of your first love. Not when we have so much to offer each other.”
“Wade,” she whispered his name and went into his embrace willingly. He hugged her against his chest and kissed her cheek.
“Fuck, baby, I missed you,” he growled in her ear.
“We missed you, angel. More than you’ll ever realize,” Mark intoned as he hugged the two of them close.
“If it’s halfway as much as I missed you, then, yes, I do realize. You don’t know how good it feels to have your arms around me again. It feels like . . .,” her mind scrambled for the right word and then she knew, “home. It feels like home.”
“Yes, my love, it does and it’s time you came back to where you belong.” Wade’s endearment drew her amazed gaze. He gave her a lopsided grin, one which deepened his sexy dimple.
“I do, you know. I love you, Chloe. I can’t explain how it happened so quickly, but I do. With all my heart.” His voice turned gruff, an indication that he wasn’t used to admitting such emotions, especially in public.
“I didn’t realize it until it was too late. When I arrived home, I became a zombie and I didn’t know why. Suddenly, my work became meaningless. I didn’t want to be in my house, which I have always loved. Now, I know, it’s because I didn’t have you in my life—both of you. God, I can’t explain it myself but I love you too, Wade.” She kissed his lips with tender passion before turning to face Mark. She cupped his cheeks and smiled.
“Gawd, you look so sexy with your loose hair and swanky tux.” Her smile turned possessive. “And you’re mine. All mine. I love you, Mark. I need you in my life to balance me. You are the glue that will keep us together.”
“You don’t know what it does to me to hear those words, angel. I couldn’t get this picture of you out of my mind and I had to paint it. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. I had to bring to light, how you made me see Golden Circle. I love you, honey. So fucking much,” he grinned with his green eyes shining. His kiss was a passionate declaration of his feelings.
She broke away and looked over his shoulders. Her eyes searched every face. Her shoulders sagged.
“He’s not here,” she whispered. Her voice cracked.
Gawd, I’ve become such a tear jerker!
Yeah, you can say that again.
She caught the glance the two men shared. Her heart sank.
“What aren’t you telling me? Where is he?”
“He’s gone, Chloe. We haven’t seen him since you left. We don’t even know if he intends to return to the US.” Wade shifted uncomfortably. The sadness was shallow in their gazes.
“You mean he left the country?”
They nodded.
“But . . . I don’t understand. Why would he just leave?”
“I’m afraid I know,” Brad said from behind them. He’d come with them to San Francisco for a meeting with his management team. They turned to see him kiss Shona’s cheek briefly in greeting before he looked at them. “But, I don’t think it’s a discussion we should have here. Shall we go to your house, Chloe? It’s closer than either of our penthouses.”
Chloe was too numb to protest and followed them outside where they all got into Brad’s SUV. The trip to her house was done in silence with each of them lost in their own thoughts.
Armed with hot, steaming mugs of coffee, they settled in the den.
“Brad, please. What’s going on?” Chloe prodded him. Her mind was frayed with worry. Something in his expression warned her that she wasn’t going to like what he had to say.
“I told you that Rex has changed after he got sick, Chloe. I also told you that he had to get a heart transplant at the time.”
“Yes, I know that already but he’s not sick anymore. He’s as healthy and strong as an ox!”
“Yeah, he is, but emotionally, he shattered the day you decided to leave.”
“But I admitted to Mark and Wade I made a mistake! I love them. God knows, he’s the one who made me realize how much I love them. I need to tell him that. Please, where is he?”
“He doesn’t want to see you again, Chloe. He made that very clear.” Brad’s face had turned rigid.
“Why? I don’t understand.” Her voice sounded brittle.
“Neither do we, Brad. We know he loves her. He’s the one who pushed us to meet her, ever since he’d seen photos of her. He even came here specifically to find her. He wouldn’t just walk away from her. There has to be more to this than what you’re telling us,” Wade demanded. He jumped up to pace in front of the window.
Brad turned to Shona. “That day, you told him who Trent Sinclair was, right?”
Shona nodded. A frown marred her brow. “But I do remember him saying to you, Wade, that he will never be a stand-in for anyone. Why would he say that?”
Brad looked at Chloe searchingly. He dragged in a deep breath. “It was because of who Trent Sinclair was.”
“Meaning? Come on Brad! I would’ve known if they knew each other. Or . . . God, please don’t tell me he was the person responsible for Trent’s accident?” Chloe felt her world beginning to crumble around her.
“No, he wasn’t, but did you know that Trent was an organ donor, Chloe?”
Chloe’s breath hissed in ragged gasps through her lips. She shook her head.
“Rex got Trent’s heart,” she whispered, shocked. “No . . . NOOOOOO!” she screamed and slumped back as she gave in to the black void of unconsciousness; the shock and lack of nutrition became too much.
“Jesus Christ! How fucked up is that? We knew about the transplant but we never knew the person who donated it.” Mark was stumped. He assisted Wade to straighten Chloe out on the sofa while Shona went to fetch some water.
“That’s what he meant when he said he’d never be a stand-in. He believes she would love him only because he has
her first love’s heart. Fuck!” Wade growled and commenced his pacing. Shona gently wiped Chloe’s face with a wet towel.
“And knowing him, if she told him she loves him now, he would think it’s because he’s got Trent’s heart beating inside him.” Brad concluded their conjecture.
“But it’s not true,” Chloe whispered from the sofa as she came to, hearing their speculation. “I’ve loved him from the beginning and it has nothing to do with the organ that pumps inside his body. It’s him, the man I’ve grown to love.”
“Yeah, Chloe, but it’s not going to be that easy to convince him of that. He’s somewhat hardheaded,” Brad warned her. He finished his coffee in one gulp and rose to leave.
Chloe sat up. “Wait! You can’t leave. I have to talk to him. He has to know how I feel and this time I’ll make sure he listens to me and see my love for what it is.”
“I know Rex, Chloe. You’ll be wasting your time.”
“No, Brad. Fighting for our future is never a waste of time. It’s an investment. One I’m not about to give up on. Please. Where is he?”
Brad straightened his shoulders and pushed his hands into his pants pockets.
“You might as well tell us, Brad. It’s our future too and we’re gonna fight for it just as hard. We’ve had private investigators searching for him for two months, but every time they get a lead, he gives them the slip.” Wade barred Brad’s exit. His intent was clear. He wasn’t going to allow him to leave until he gave them what they wanted.
“Very well. Rex is in Pyeongchang, South Korea. He’s been called in to assist the special design team for the Olympic Commission, to fix the design bugs in the stadium where the 2018 Olympic event will be hosted. Apparently, the head Architect on the project had recently suffered a personal loss and couldn’t continue. He accepted the assignment under the condition that it’s not advertised publicly.”
“Well, I’ve never been to Korea. Now’s a good time as any to take a vacation,” Mark said.
“Thanks Brad. I appreciate you telling us.”
“Don’t make me regret it, Chloe. I won’t take kindly to my cousin being hurt again.”