Falling for Love

by Vicki Green

  “I am worried about him, Brock. How can I not be? It’s not like I can just switch my feelings on and off, but it’s pretty clear she thinks that they’re together. Maybe they are. Still doesn’t mean I don’t want him to get well. I just can’t….” I look through the front window. “I just can’t be in his room to comfort him when she is. I can’t make sense of everything right now. I know in my heart he doesn’t feel that way about her, but it still hurts.” I look over at him and see the concentrated look on his face. “I’m just done with it all. I want him to get better, I truly do, and I still care about him. However, I’m done opening my heart just to have it stepped on again. I can’t do it anymore. It’s better that I just get back to my life.”

  He reaches over and covers my hands. “I get it, Irish. I really do but I don’t think he has feelings for her. He’s just trying to make it right with her in case the baby is his. He doesn’t love her or even want her. He told me.” My heart beat quickens. What if? What if he’s right? Then I go back to wondering if he can be true to me. That he would never stray. “If the baby ends up being his, he wants to be a good father. The baby deserves that. From what he’s told me, this Margie girl sounds a bit crazy.” He squeezes my hand. “Let him get better. Give him a chance, Irish. Doesn’t he deserve that?” Shit. He could be right. Am I being unfair not to wait and see what the outcome is? Can I accept the baby if it is his and he wants a relationship with me too? Can I ever let go and try to trust him? I want to. I want to so badly.

  My chin quivers with the thought of never being with him again. “You’re right, I know. I just don’t know if I have it in me anymore. Good thing you came back when you did, I was ready to kick her ass outta there.” I turn and look out my window, laying my head against the glass. I hear his chuckles as his hand leaves mine.

  “Yeah, good thing. I know you would have and then I’d have to probably bail you out of jail. One thing at a time, please.” I take a deep breath and let out a big sigh. The rest of the ride to my apartment is in silence.

  Chapter Thirteen

  Caylan

  Unfamiliar sounds surround me. I try to lift my arm but pain sweeps through me. My eyes feel heavy. My entire body hurts. What in the hell happened? I feel like I’ve been beaten up or I’ve been hit by a truck, neither one a better choice, but it would explain the way I’m feeling. I try to take a breath but only manage a small one when pain hits me again. I pry one eye open when I feel air rushing into my lungs and bring my left hand up to my nose. A tube seems to be feeding oxygen into my system. I see a tube protruding from my hand, and my eye follows it up until I can’t see it anymore, not wanting to turn my head. The feeling of grogginess overtakes me, my mouth dry and my lips feel cracked. Memories of being in a house, shots fired, and chaos all around. I squeeze my eyes tight, remembering being shot in the side, then again in my shoulder. I open them and look down, the lower half of my body covered by a blanket. I was so cold, freezing. “Too much blood.” I shake my head at my thoughts. “Can’t stop the bleeding.”

  I hear footsteps and snap my eyes to the door.

  Margie.

  How did she know? I really don’t want to see her. Not now. Can’t I catch a break? My brows lower at my internal thoughts. Selfish. Maybe there’s something wrong with the baby? “Are you okay?” I ask, my voice croaks from being dry and lack of use. She walks over, slowly, then sits down in the chair beside the bed. I watch as she covers her stomach with her hand then look up into her eyes that are wet and red from crying. “Is it the baby?”

  She shakes her head. “I’ve been so worried about you. They said you’re in critical condition. I only just found you again, I was scared I’d lose you.”

  Oh. How do I answer this without seeming like I’m uncaring? “Thank you. Um…. I’m sure I’ll be fine. I’m a fighter.” I smile but I know it has to look pretty fake. I try to change the subject quickly. “Do you happen to know where my phone is?”

  Right then my eyes snap to the doorway when a doctor and nurse walk in. The nurse immediately walks over to the left side of the bed and begins checking things. The doctor holds an electronic chart in his hands and is studying it, reading glasses perched low on his nose. “You had a very close call, Mr. Dorn.” His eyes keep scanning the file, not looking up at me at all. “The bullet wound in your shoulder passed through to the other side. Minimal damage was done and was repaired in surgery.” He looks up over the rim of his reading glasses at me. “You won’t be using that arm for a few weeks and will need some therapy after that.” Okay, that doesn’t sound too bad. I can deal with that. “However, the other bullet penetrated through one of your kidneys. This caused severe blood loss. We were able to repair it but we’ll need to keep an eye on it for a couple of days.” Great. I guess I should consider myself lucky. “Either way, here or at home, I would recommend bed rest for three to four weeks.” What? His eyes widen. “As I said, you had a very close call.” He turns and walks out of the room, leaving me in a state of shock.

  I look over as the nurse walks back around the bed. She comes to my right side and smiles. “Are you feeling any discomfort?”

  She looks to be maybe in her fifties. Nice smile and kind eyes. Blonde hair up in a bun and very blue eyes. “A little,” I respond and give my own smile.

  “I’ll give you something to help with that.” I watch her bring out a shot from her uniform front pocket, her face concentrating as she pushes the needle into the IV hanging from a pole beside my bed. She looks back down at me. “I’m afraid no food until at least tomorrow then it may be rather bland and of a liquid variety. I’ll see what Dr. Johnson thinks in the morning. He did tell me you can have some ice chips so I’ll bring you a cup.” She begins to walk by, and I reach over grasp her arm.

  “Thank you, uh….” I look at her name tag. “Trina.” She gives me another warm smile. “May I have my personal belongings?” I release her arm and lay my hand back on the mattress.

  “Oh, my, yes. I’m sorry. Most patients in the ICU aren’t awake enough for that but you seem to be doing so well. I’m sure in the next day or two, if you keep this up, the doctor will agree to move you to a regular room. I’ll get those with your ice chips and bring them to you.”

  “Thank you, Trina.”

  I watch her leave the room and close my eyes, pressing my head into the hard pillow. Thoughts of Irish infiltrate my mind. Now I won’t be able to take her on the date I wanted to. In fact, I don’t even know what day it is or how long I’ve been out. The feeling of confusion flows through me and my brows lower in thought.

  “Are you okay? Do you need the nurse?”

  I look up at Margie. I’d forgotten she was still here. “What day is it?”

  “Um, it’s Monday. You’ve been out since they brought you in here.”

  “Shit!” She jumps at my voice. “Sorry. I’m feeling a little off. And tired.”

  She looks at me with concern then her brows raise. “Oh! Did you want me to leave?”

  “If you don’t mind. I appreciate you being here but really, I am quite tired.” I yawn. It’s not at all fake.

  She stands, holding underneath her stomach. “Okay. I’ll be back later.” She takes a step towards me and leans down. Her mouth aims for mine and I turn my head. She kisses my cheek instead. When she stands back, I look at her in confusion. She frowns but then quickly changes to a smile. “Do you need anything?”

  I shake my head. “Thank you. No.”

  I swear she pouts. “Alright. Get some rest. I’ll be back later.”

  I watch her walk out and right after the nurse walks in. “Here you go, Mr. Dorn. I assure you everything is here.” She slides the long table over my bed and places everything on it, along with a cup of ice chips and a plastic spoon. “If you need anything, just hit the nurse’s button right there on the bed railing.” She points and I give her a smile.

  She leaves and I grab my phone. “Shit. Barely any battery left.” I send off a text quickly, hoping she’ll reply be
fore my phone dies.

  Me: Irish. I’m so sorry I didn’t get to come over last night. I was detained. I promise it was not intentional and I couldn’t get to my phone. Please, forgive me.

  As I wait, I decide to shoot off another one quickly.

  Me: Brock. Hey, sorry to bother you. I’m in the hospital. Long story. Can you bring up a phone charger for me? Sorry, man, but my phone is about to die.

  I’m a bit anxious when it vibrates in my hand. My heart accelerates with the thought of Irish. I frown when I see it’s Brock. Not that I’m not glad he’s answering but I was really hoping it would be her.

  Brock: Yeah, I know. Well, some of it. No bother at all. Be right up. Need anything else?

  I smile. Thank God!

  Me: I wish I could say food but not allowed yet. Thanks!

  Brock: Ha! Be up in a few. Hang in there.

  I’m still smiling as I lay my head back against the pillow. My eyes are growing so heavy. That shot Trina gave me is knocking me out. I know I need the rest. My body needs some major healing, but I really want to stay awake to see if Irish texts back. I’ll just rest my eyes for a few minutes. I keep my phone in my hand so I’ll feel it vibrate. Just a few minutes.

  My eyes open slowly. It’s dark. I look over and see Brock sitting in a chair. “How long….” My voice is groggy with sleep. Bringing my hand up, I push on the oxygen tube in my nose and clear my throat. “How long have you been here?” He smiles, leans over and picks up a cup from the table and hands it to me. Ice chips. I never did have any before I fell asleep. Too tired.

  “Been here a few hours. Thought you might want some company when you woke up.” I spoon up a few pieces of ice and close my eyes as I put them in my mouth. Damn, that’s so good. When I reopen them, he’s watching me. Not uncomfortable. He’s my best friend. Family. “I, uh, plugged your phone in. It was dead by the time I got here.” I look down at the table and see the cord plugged into my phone, my eyes following it as it hangs down from the table and reaches to the wall. I look back over at him and smile.

  “Thanks. I appreciate that.” I pick up my phone and turn it on, impatiently waiting to see if I’ve got a text. It doesn’t take long to come on but I immediately frown when no new texts are there.

  “So. What happened, Caylan? Kane had told me you went on some undercover job. Next thing I know is you’re here and all banged up.”

  Setting my phone down, I look over at him and lay my head back on the pillow. Feels like it weighs a ton and so do my eyes. “Yeah. Backup got there but not until I’d been shot a couple of times. Wasn’t their fault. I was so off my game. Too much shit on my mind.”

  He leans down, resting his arms on his legs and clasps his hands, looking up at me. “Well, it’s no wonder. Not sure why you do those jobs anyway. Don’t really need the money that bad, do ya?” I barely shake my head. “Anyway. Glad to hear you’re gonna be okay.” He reaches up and rubs his chin. “Gotta tell you, Irish is pretty upset.” My brows raise and my eyes widen with the sound of her name. All of a sudden I feel more awake. “Yeah, I…. I brought her up here, after they’d gotten you in here from surgery. You were out of it but she kinda walked in on Margie sittin’ by you.” Oh, shit! No! “Yeah, I guess Margie was acting like you and her are together and she was saying shit like how she is gonna take care of you and she can’t wait until you’re better so that you, the baby, and she can all be together.” I look down. Sadness sweeps over me. No wonder Irish didn’t answer my text. “Look.” I look at him and frown. “Give her some time. She was really worried about you. I mean – really upset, Caylan. I know how she feels about you but I also know how she feels about men in general. Took a lot for her to spend last weekend with you. She’s hurt and confused. Just give her time.”

  “But….” I have to clear my throat again to remove the hoarseness. “How much time should I give her? I mean…. She’s it for me, Brock. I don’t want anyone else. I’ve….” I look down and take a deep breath, trying to calm my heart. When I look back up at him I notice he looks sad too. “I love her, Brock. She thinks I’m like all the other guys out there that can’t be with just one woman but I can. I want to. Need to. I only want her and that will never change. She has no idea how special she is. I just…. I don’t know how to convince her that I’m not going anywhere.”

  He shifts in his seat. “She’s a tough one, that’s for sure. This whole thing with Margie hasn’t helped, I know. Look. You’re family just the same as she is. I pretty much wanna knock some sense into her but she’d probably kick my ass.” A laugh bursts from my mouth, my hand covers over my side as pain shoots through me with the movement. “Sorry.” I take a couple of deep breaths and just nod at him. “I think after the DNA tests are done and you know for sure about the baby that might help.”

  My phone vibrates on the table and I look down at it quickly. “My mom’s calling.” I wonder how she found out.

  He pushes against his knees as he stands. “I’ll leave you to that. Call or text me later or in the morning. I’ll probably be bringing Taren over to visit. She’s been biting at the bit to get over here but has been resting a lot.” He leans over and gently pats my shoulder. “You just try to relax. Not gonna do any good until you get better.”

  I look up and smile. Such a good friend. Family. “Thanks, Brock. I’d love to see Taren. You tell her, okay?” He nods and then leaves me to my call.

  I pick up the phone, removing the charger cord, and hold it up to my ear. “Hi, Mom.”

  “Oh, thank God! After your text and then no replies or calls back from you, I thought….” I can just envision her hand over her heart. “Well, I’m so thankful you’re okay. Is that job done? Please tell me you won’t go on anymore of those — undercover things. You don’t need money that badly, Caylan Gregory Dorn.” Oh, great. The full name. I’ve definitely worried her this time. Should I tell her I’m in the hospital? Yeah, she’ll find out anyway. “Since you couldn’t come home last weekend, are you going to come this weekend? You know we haven’t seen you in months. After that last “accident” you didn’t even come home for a visit.” I just let her ramble on for a bit, biding my time when she starts yelling and crying when I tell her where I am. “I mean it’s been months. Your sister, Jen….” I only have one. “She’s been dying to see you too. We’re not used to going this long without a visit. Your dad will actually be home from traveling as well. So, really, you have no excuse.” Oh, yeah. I kinda do. Shit.

  “Mom.” She keeps rambling. “Uh, Mom?”

  “Yes, dear?” Finally. Now I’m all kinds of nervous. Not sure why, she’s always been there for me. Then again, she hates when I go undercover and if I hadn’t saved Brock and Kane’s lives, she’d have walloped me for running into that burning shack after them. She actually told me that. But she’s my mom. She loves me and worries about me. Sigh.

  “I’m not gonna be able to come home for a while, Mom.” I hear her heavy sigh. I hate telling her this. Better to just get it over with, remove the Band-Aid quickly so to speak. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. “I was hurt and am in the hospital.” She gasps. “But I’m okay, Mom. I’m just not gonna be able to travel for a couple of months.”

  “Oh, my Lord!”

  “A month! I won’t be able to travel for a month but I’ll be there before you know it.”

  “Alan! Alan. Pack a bag. We’re going to Florida.” I pull the phone away from my ear she’s screaming so loud.

  “No! No! Mom!”

  “If our boy is hurt, we are coming there. I’ll call your sister, Jen.” Like I don’t know who that is. “I know she’ll want to come too. We’ll take care of you.”

  “Why? What’s wrong? You know next week I have to go to Philadelphia for work.” I hear Dads voice in the background.

  “This is your son, Alan! He’s hurt and in the hospital. He needs us right now.”

  “MOM!” Silence. I knew this would happen. I shouldn’t have answered the phone and called Jen first. Although, sh
e probably wouldn’t have been much better. “Mom. Please calm down. I’m fine. I just have to heal some and maybe a little therapy but I’ll be good as new.”

  “Therapy? Oh, my God! What kind of therapy? Alan! Get that bag packed!”

  I set my phone down on my leg and rub my hand down my face. She may just be the death of me, then I won’t have to worry about them coming here. I pick my phone up and pray she’ll let me explain. “Mom. I was shot.”

  “SHOT?”

  “Twice.”

  “Oh, my God! We’re stopping at every church on the way there. I’ll say the rosary and we’ll light candles.”

  “Mom. Can you please calm down for me? You’re making me really tired.” I wince into the phone as I shift. I might have done that on purpose — a little.

  “Yes, dear. I’ll try.” She wears me out when I’m healthy. Now is not a good time for this.

  “Okay. Thank you. I was shot in my right shoulder and side. I’m just really tired and need some time to heal but they’re taking really good care of me at the hospital. Brock has been here to see me and he’s bringing Taren over tomorrow. You remember Brock and Taren?”

  “Yes, Brock is the one you ran into that burning building to save.” Oh, my.

  “Mom. It was a shack but yes, I did save him. Anyway, they’re my best friends. So you see. I have people here who care about me that are watching out for me. Okay? Don’t drive here. I wouldn’t be good company and probably won’t be out of the hospital in the next few days.” I know it’s like talking to a brick wall but I have to try. It’s silly for them to come all this way to watch me sleep.

  “Alan! Hold up! Okay, well, I’ll call you every day and then when you’re being released, we’ll come there. If your dad can’t get the time off from work then Jen and I will come.” She gasps again and I twitch. “Does she know?”