Zooey and her parents were staring at me blankly with something that wasn’t even shock. It was more like total incomprehension. I turned back to my dad, took in another breath, and continued.
“Anyway, I didn’t have any idea that Mick and Aria had already slipped that bacteria in her soda when I went inside...but it was probably a good thing that I was there, because I helped save her life. Have you ever seen vibrio vulnificus up close?” I shook my head.
“It’s pretty hideous.”
My dad scowled. “Harlan said—”
“Harlan was just trying to protect me,” I said. “That’s why he told you that it was all a joke. I was mad at him at the time, but now I realize that he was only trying to help.”
“But he came back to the house later,” Dad said, “and told us it was all true.”
“You did?” I glanced at Harlan. “Why?”
“I thought they’d listen,” Harlan said. “I wanted them to know the truth.”
“Yeah,” I said. “That was...probably a good idea.” I turned back to look at Zooey again, and this time I made myself stare straight into her eyes. “The point is, I was wrong about everything, and Harlan was right. Zooey’s a person, not a science experiment. I might have been inside her heart, but I don’t really know her at all—and I don’t deserve to. Zooey, I’m sorry.”
“Wait a second,” Mr. Andrews said. “I’m a little confused here. When you say you were inside my daughter’s heart, you’re speaking metaphorically, right?”
“No, sir,” I said. “I mean that I was actually inside the left ventricle.”
“The left...” Mr. Andrews looked at his wife, then back at me. “I don’t understand. Was this part of the play?”
“I’m not sure.” Zooey’s mom glanced at the camera. “She didn’t tape that part.”
“Well, it’s not important,” Mr. Andrews said. “What matters is that Zooey’s going to be fine.” He stood up and walked over to my father, holding out his hand. “I’m Robert Andrews, by the way, Zooey’s father. This is my wife, Laura.” He beamed at me. “Quite a boy you’ve got there.”
“Thank you.” My dad allowed his hand to be pumped twice up and down, but his eyes never left mine. Behind the lenses of his glasses, he seemed incapable of so much as a blink.
“We’re going down to the cafeteria to get a cup of coffee if you and your wife want to join us,” Zooey’s dad said. “Give the kids a little privacy before visiting hours are over. It’s been quite a day.”
“I-I’ll...just...” My dad just looked at me. “My wife and I...”
“Great,” Mr. Andrews said. “See you shortly.”
When he and Zooey’s mom left, my dad turned back to me. He was quiet for what felt like a very long time, and the only noise was the steady beep of Zooey’s heart monitor from the corner of the room.
“Look, Dad,” I said. “You don’t have to say anything. I get it. I messed up today, bigtime. And if you and Mom still want to send me to Brixton—”
“Lenny, come here.” He leaned forward and gave me a hug, squeezing me tightly. “Son, I’m so proud of you.”
“What?” I drew back, so stunned that I was sure Id misheard what he’d said. “You’re not mad?”
“When you first told me this morning,” he said, “I was in shock. I simply couldn’t believe it. And then when I thought you’d made the whole thing up, I was angry...but I suppose some part of me was also relieved. The idea of my own son succeeding where I had failed...” He shook his head. “Lenny, what you did today will change the annals of scientific history forever. If your mother and I send you off to Brixton, how would we ever help you develop this technology’s true potential?”
“You...want to help me?”
“Of course,” he said. “If it’s all right with you.”
I looked at him and smiled. “Yeah,” I said. “I’d like that.”
“Good. When you get home tonight, we’ll sit down and go over all of it, step by step. I want to hear everything you did from the very beginning. Your mother will want to hear it too.”
“Okay.”
“Excellent.” He clapped me on the back, and turned to Harlan and Zooey. “Good to see you both again. You should come by the house sometime, Zooey.”
When he left, Harlan frowned at me. “Did he just say annals?”
“Hey.” I sat down in front of Zooey, whose expression hadn’t changed since I’d told her about what really happened today. “You’re...probably pretty angry right now, huh?”
She glared at me. “Yes. I mean...” She paused. “No. I don’t know.” She reached back and tucked a strand of hair back behind her eyes. “Is that all true, Lenny? What you did?”
“Yeah.”
“You actually dropped down into my stomach and traveled through my whole body to my brain, all so you could get to know me better?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Wow.” She just stared at me for a long moment. “All this time, I thought you were supposed to be smart.”
“Yeah, well,” I said, “I guess you didn’t really know me any better than I knew you.”
She reached over and squeezed my hand. “You are aware that there are other ways of becoming somebody’s friend, right?”
“I get it,” I said. “Harlan deserves you more than I do.”
“What?” Harlan sat up, blushing. “Nobody said—”
“Deserves me?” Zooey cut in, taking her hand back. “When I was in your brain,” I said, “I saw how much you think about him. It’s pretty obvious you like him.”
“Lenny...” She smiled. “Harlan’s my friend. Friends think about each other.”
“So that’s all he is, a friend?”
“That’s what he is,” Zooey said. “You, too. And I don’t have to choose between either you because I’ve already chosen both of you—as friends. Got it?”
“Okay,” I said. “I guess I can live with that.”
“Good, because you’re going to have to. I’m not even allowed to date until high school anyway.”
We all sat there without talking for a second, and then she said, “I do have one question...When you were floating around inside of me—I mean, what did I look like?”
“What did you look like?”
“You know, from the inside,” she said. “I mean, all those veins and glands and everything. Was it gross?”
“Zooey,” I said, “please. We’re talking about the opportunity to witness the miracle of human physiological interaction on the molecular level. It was...” I glanced up at her. “It was pretty gross.”
She smiled. “I’d hate to see what you look like inside.”
“Maybe you’ll get a chance,” I said. “Maybe next time—”
“Oh, no,” Harlan said. “Never again, Lenny, seriously.”
“No, I was thinking, what if we reversed the process?”
“Reversed?” Zooey asked.
“Sure. You know —increased Planck’s Constant. Increased everything on the molecular level. I mean, it stands to reason...” I looked up. “What, too soon?”
Harlan and Zooey were both staring at me, but the idea was already taking shape in my head, and I could tell right away that it wasn’t just going to be big.
It was going to be huge.
Visit www.hmhbooks.com to find more books by Joe Schreiber.
About the Author and Illustrator
JOE SCHREIBER is the author of Au Revoir, Crazy European Chick and Perry’s Killer Playlist. He lives in Pennsylvania. Visit his blog at www.scaryparent.blogspot.com.
The illustrator MATT SMITH is best known for his work in Highlights for Children, Cricket, and Muse. He lives in Lexington, Massachusetts. Visit his website at www.matt-illustrations.com.
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Lenny Cyrus, School Virus (9780547893167) Page 17