Go, Josie. That’s where your joy and peace will be.
There had been moments when she had felt God speaking directly to her heart. She’d heard it when He told her to keep Tommy, she’d heard it when He told her to go to nursing school, she’d heard it during difficult moments at the hospital when she had to make life and death decisions; And she heard Him now.
Brandon is the one I have for you. Take him as your husband. Go. Love him and let him love you. Don’t just believe in the blessings you already have; Believe in the ones you can’t even imagine yet!
Faith spoke again. “You never want to take, Josie. You give your patients a hundred-and-ten percent every night, pour yourself out daily for Tommy, help everyone around you--whenever, for whatever, never expecting anything in return, but then you don’t let us watch Tommy without insisting on restocking our refrigerator, you refuse Dad’s offer to buy you a car and only let Brandon drive you to work because he absolutely insists. Need I go on?”
“I let Dad pay for nursing school,” she argued.
“Oh, please,” Faith retorted. “Only because you knew it would allow you to provide well for Tommy and not be a burden to us anymore. I told you to wait a year, remember?”
Josie swallowed hard, knowing Faith was right. Brandon certainly wasn’t the first person she had ever said no to.
“Don’t do it this time, Josie. Let Brandon love you. For the last seven years I’ve been praying for someone you could share your life with. Haven’t you been doing the same?”
Josie thought about the countless times she had whispered prayers heavenward for God to bring a wonderful man into their lives. And all the times she thought she might be asking too much of Him--for something she did not deserve.
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Then why would you expect anything less than the best from God? Brandon is a gift--a wonderful, perfect gift. Don’t throw that away.”
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Josie left Faith’s to be home when Tommy arrived. With some time to spare before his bus was due, she went up to the apartment to read the story Faith had talked about. In John, chapter eight, she found the words Jesus spoke to the woman.
‘Go and sin no more.’
They spoke to the depths of her spirit as only God could. She had been living the second part, keeping herself pure since the last time she and Kent had been together. But in letting her past mistakes hold her back from the blessings God had for her now, she realized she had not fully received the forgiveness He wanted her to experience.
Josie thought about Ellen, Brandon’s aunt. She had asked Brandon about her situation after hearing the initial news from Amy. Ellen had been engaged when she had gotten pregnant, but her fiancé had left town when she told him, and he never returned. Ellen had married her current husband two years after her daughter was born, and they had two more daughters and a son together.
When she thought about Ellen, she saw a godly woman; a happily married mother of four; a smiling face that had welcomed her so easily; a servant of God. Not someone chained to the past.
I must go forward. I must live. I must believe that He loves me unconditionally. The tears came again, and she thanked God for His mercy and love and the rich life He had given her. A peace settled over her heart. She was forgiven. She was free. God loved her and wanted to bless her. Brandon wanted to marry her, and that was okay! She could have him. All she had to do was accept his love and go on with the wonderful life God had planned for them. To be still in His grace and love, not fight against it. That’s where her peace and joy had gone: right out the window with her unbelief in God’s grace.
I have asked you for a husband, Jesus. You know that. What Faith said made me realize I haven’t actually believed you could ever bring someone as wonderful as Brandon into my life. I don’t deserve him, but I am grateful, and I’m not going to throw away such a perfect gift. You have answered my prayers beyond my wildest imagination, and it’s not a fairy tale. It’s better than that. It’s You. It’s all from You.
Seeing that Tommy’s bus would be coming in a few minutes, she closed her Bible and went to get her coat, suddenly wishing that Brandon wasn’t out of town. But it was her own fault for not asking him to come back today like he had offered last night. Walking toward the elevator, she heard the door opening before she had a chance to push the button and saw a baby stroller being wheeled out, followed by Angela. Baby Nathan tossed a toy onto the carpet, and Josie stepped forward to pick it up.
“Thanks, Brandon,” she heard Angela say.
Josie’s eyes snapped up. Brandon was standing in the elevator, handing Angela a shopping bag she had dropped. Neither of them had noticed her. Josie’s heart leapt with joy at the sight of him.
Josie retrieved the colorful rattle. Angela saw her then and thanked her.
“You’re welcome,” she replied, handing the toy back to Baby Nathan. He looked up and grasped his prized possession, blowing raspberries at her.
She returned her gaze to Brandon. A wonderful lazy smile and his tender brown eyes met hers, saying so much to her renewed spirit and peace-filled heart.
“Looks like she’s surprised,” Angela said. She turned and winked at Josie before wheeling Baby Nathan away.
Brandon had not emerged from the elevator, and Josie stepped inside the cubicle and into his arms. She had been praying for him for so long--for a father for Tommy, for a husband to share her life with. Without a doubt in her mind she knew Brandon was the one. Letting him go would be the biggest mistake of her life.
“What are you doing here?” she asked, clinging to him as she never had before and drinking in his wonderful scent.
“I hired someone to fix the roof,” he said, holding her tight. “I called my dad after lunch and told him there would be a crew at his house in the morning because I was spending the weekend with you.”
The elevator door closed behind her. Brandon released his tight hold and searched her face. The longing in his eyes brought fresh tears from her own. He leaned down and kissed her. Josie allowed his unconditional love to wash over her and penetrate her heart like never before.
“I missed you,” he whispered. “More than I ever thought possible. Talking on the phone isn’t the same. Three days felt like three weeks.”
He kissed her again. The gentle passion flowed into the depths of her soul and made her feel loved and cherished. He lingered until the elevator reached the bottom floor, then drew away reluctantly.
“I need to go meet Tommy,” she said, smiling and catching her breath. “Come with me, and we’ll take a walk in the park?”
“Sure. I’d like change my clothes first though. I’ll meet you in a few minutes, all right?”
She nodded, feeling almost afraid to let him out of her sight. Stepping out of the elevator, she turned toward the outside doors. The bus had arrived, and she jogged to the corner to meet Tommy.
She led him to a bench and said Brandon was coming in a few minutes to go for a walk with them. Tommy pulled a picture he had drawn of a green turtle out of his backpack to show her.
“You’ll have to show this to Brandon,” she said. “It is very nice.”
He kept the paper in his hands and wiped his nose on his sleeve.
“I want to talk to you about something,” she said, digging into his backpack to find his hat and placing the red cap over his head. “And I want you to tell me the truth, okay?”
“Okay.”
“How would you feel about me and Brandon getting married?”
Tommy looked up. “Will he live with us?”
“Yes,” Josie replied, wiping his nose with a tissue.
“Will Brandon be my daddy?”
“Yes. He wants us to be a family. Would you like that?”
Tommy’s blue eyes sparkled. He nodded and smiled.
Josie smiled back. “I’d like that too.”
She saw Brandon walking toward them a few minutes later. He had changed from his business clothes
into jeans. Josie felt as if her love for him had grown in the last five minutes. She and Tommy rose from the bench to meet him.
“Hey, buddy,” Brandon said, greeting him with a secret handshake they had invented. “How was school?”
Tommy showed Brandon his turtle drawing, and they walked toward the park with Brandon giving Tommy a piggyback ride most of the way.
“You putting on weight, buddy?” he asked when they reached the grass. Brandon put him down with a groan.
Tommy shrugged.
“He probably is. He’s been eating everything in sight the last couple of weeks,” she said, corralling him into a brief hug.
“You’re going to be as big as me one of these days,” Brandon added.
Tommy smiled. “Yeah, and I’ll be faster too.”
Brandon removed Tommy’s red hat, tousled his hair and replaced the cap, pulling it down over his eyes.
Tommy kept walking, his eyes covered, and Brandon steered him in the right direction. Josie laughed watching the two of them. Like two peas in a pod.
When they reached the water, Tommy pushed his hat up and ran a few paces ahead, stopping to climb on the railing and look out at the river. He continued this pattern, pointing out different things each time: A log floating on the water, a boat cruising by, a bird flying up to his nest on the bridge. She and Brandon followed behind, walking hand in hand.
“Do you have a lot of work to do or can we have you all to ourselves for the rest of the day?”
“You don’t work tonight?” he asked.
“No,” she said, bringing a smile to his face. “I switched nights with someone.”
“In that case, I’m all yours,” he said, putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close.
Josie smiled at his choice of words. Yes, you are all mine.
“Have you given any more thought to becoming a midwife?” Brandon asked.
She was surprised by his words. She’d had other things on her mind the last few weeks. “A little,” she replied.
She knew she wanted to, but she didn’t see how going to school and working full-time would be possible. She didn’t have the time or the money, although she had considered asking her dad if he would help her out on the financial end of things.
“I think I’d like to,” she elaborated. “I need to find out more information about cost and everything though.”
“I’m willing to help however you need,” he said. “Money, free baby-sitting, anything. Don’t be afraid to ask, okay?”
“Okay,” she replied, thinking that yesterday she would have responded much differently to such an offer. Yesterday her pride and fear would have gotten in the way. But not today. It wasn’t going to be just her and Tommy anymore. She didn’t have to do this all by herself.
Seeing Tommy running up the steps toward the fountain area, Josie came to a stop and turned to face Brandon. His eyes remained on Tommy for a moment, reminding Josie of how much he cared for her son.
“You haven’t tossed that ring into the river yet, have you?”
Brandon’s warm brown eyes met hers, and he smiled. “Not a chance. I have it right here.”
He reached inside his coat and pulled the gold band from an inner pocket. Somehow she wasn’t surprised he kept it with him at all times. The thought of Brandon slipping it onto her finger gave her goose bumps.
“I think I would like to wear it now,” she said.
Delight filled his handsome face. “Are you asking me to marry you, Josie Matthews?”
“Yes, I am,” she said. “I love you, Brandon, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. You are a gift from God to me. A very wonderful gift.”
Feeling him take her hand, she watched him extend her cool fingers. He slid the ring into place. It fit perfectly.
“You are a gift to me, Josie,” he said, grasping both of her hands and kissing her fingers gently. “And I love you. Don’t ever forget that. No matter what the future holds for us, we will be together. I promise.”
He leaned forward to kiss her lips, but a voice interrupted them.
“When can I start calling you Daddy?” Tommy asked, tugging on Brandon’s jacket.
Brandon lifted his eyes back to her in surprise.
“We had a little talk while you were upstairs,” she said.
“Oh, did you now?” he said, lifting Tommy into his arms.
Tommy smiled and giggled when Brandon tickled him.
“Well, buddy, I think we’ll have to wait until after the wedding,” he said. “Can you wait that long?”
“When will that be?” Tommy asked, sounding exasperated.
Brandon shifted his gaze back to her. “Next weekend?”
Josie shook her head. “I need at least two months. This is going to be my first and only wedding, and I want to do it right.”
“Okay,” Brandon said. “We’ll give you two months, but no more.”
“Yeah, Mommy,” Tommy joined in. “Two months.”
Brandon put Tommy down, and the three of them headed back to the apartment. Josie took one of Tommy’s hands, and Brandon held the other.
Looking down at Tommy and then up to Brandon, Josie knew she could not be any more blessed. Brandon caught her staring at him and brought them all to a stop. He leaned down and whispered something in Tommy’s ear. Tommy nodded, and Brandon stepped around him to pull her into an embrace.
“He gave me permission to kiss you,” he said.
Josie smiled and felt Brandon’s lips meet hers, enjoying the thought she would have this man to hold and to kiss for the rest of her life. Brandon released her and smiled, seeming to be thinking the same thing about her.
“Come on, buddy,” he said, turning back to Tommy and offering him a piggyback ride. “You owe me a rematch on Mario Kart. I get to be Yoshi this time.”
“Okay,” Tommy replied, grabbing Brandon around the neck. Brandon lifted him up, and they headed for home.
Josie looked up at the two smiling faces--at the two special men in her life. The wait had been long, but God had been faithful. He had brought the three of them together at the right time.
To love. To laugh. To live.
I’d love to hear how God has used
this story to touch your heart.
Write me at:
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Baby's Breath (Garden of Love 2) Page 28