Kerri couldn’t believe Connor just walked away. She’d turned around, relieved to find him standing there…and he’d walked away. Her insides twisted into a tight knot, and she rubbed her chest in an attempt to lessen the pain.
He left me with Duke.
And it wasn’t that he hadn’t heard her call his name because he’d glared right at her with so much anger and contempt she’d stopped dead in her tracks.
“Forget about him,” Duke said from behind. “He’s not worth your time.”
Swiveling around, she stared at the bastard who’d just ruined something very special. And dammit, it was her fault to. She knew better. Her instincts told her not to trust the man who’d approached her a few minutes ago saying Connor had sent him to tell her to meet him in the horse stable because he was going to be a few minutes longer.
She’d walked in to find the building empty. Her mind had screamed this was a mistake, so she’d turned to leave and found Duke. Attempting to go around him, she’d asked him to move, but he said, “Sorry, this is for your own good,” then spun her around and kissed her…exactly when Connor must’ve walked in.
It had all happened so fast, the twisting around, pinning of her arms to her sides, his mouth coming down on hers so hard she’d tasted blood, but within seconds his head had lifted and he’d pushed her hair behind her ear. That’s when she’d heard a commotion from behind and had turned to find Connor glaring. She’d called out, expecting him to help, to…
Instead, he’d left her there, obviously thinking she’d been kissing Duke for pleasure. God…how could he think such a thing? Especially after the day they’d had…the kiss they’d just shared by the 4-H building?
“McCall is a pompous ass. You can do better,” Duke continued, brushing an invisible speck off his shoulder.
Anger rushed through her in a fierce wave. “Enjoyed yourself did you?”
“Oh, honey you have no idea,” he said with a ruthless laugh.
Chapter Nineteen
Before Kerri could think twice, she reeled back and her fist connected with Duke’s jaw. He flailed backwards.
“That was for kissing me.”
He rubbed his chin and took a menacing step toward her. “You bitch!”
Fury flowed free and rapid now. Before he reached her, she used her training and spun around, hitting the other side of his face with her foot, thankful her skirt allowed movement.
Duke staggered backwards and cursed.
“This is for Connor.” Kerri pivoted in the opposite direction before he could right himself, and the force of her kick hitting his chest sent him crashing through a stall. The jerk landed in a combination of hay, dirt and manure.
Planting her feet, she grinned, but no amusement resided in her body. “Now, that’s a look that suits you.” Rage quivered through her limbs as she stared down at him. “If you ever come near me or touch me again, I’ll call the police.”
With that said, she turned and went to find Connor. She knew he was hurting. Knew he thought she was like the others. That she’d used him.
He should know better, her mind insisted, but given the amount of times he’d been hurt, she doubted he knew anything but mistrust.
The fair was hoping now. Throngs of people littered the fairway. God, it was going to be impossible to find him. Since her phone was with her stuff in his truck, she couldn’t call him or text, although she doubted he’d answer anyway.
Kerri pushed through the crowd, glancing at every stand, tent and building she passed.
She had to find him. Pain wracked her body, both physical and emotional. She flexed her throbbing hand. Hitting Duke had been worth the discomfort. But now she had to find Connor. She couldn’t just let him go like that, thinking she’d cheated.
He should know better, her mind insisted again. And was right. He should. Disappointment intensified her ache. He didn’t trust her, and a relationship didn’t work without trust. She wasn’t going to worry about that now. She just needed to find him.
Heading to the next tent, the beer tent, she didn’t have to go in and look because Connor waltzed out. Relief pulled some of the stiffness from her body as her steps slowed.
“Connor, there you are. I’ve been looking for you,” she said, careful to keep the hurt from her voice. “Why didn’t you wait?”
Smirking, he looked down his nose at her. “Why? Did you want to make it a threesome?”
She sucked in a sharp gasp of air, which backed up in her throat because her chest was so tight. He didn’t bother to wait for her answer. He just turned to walk away.
Kerri lunged forward and grabbed his arm to swing him around. “Wait just a minute, Connor. What did you think you saw?”
She knew, but had to hear in order to disprove it.
A scowl darkened his face. “I saw exactly what I needed to see, Kerri. You are no better than the rest of them. In fact, darlin’, you’re worse!”
Anger and sadness mixed to form an emotional paste in her chest. She could hardly breathe from the weight. “You know what, Connor? You are almost right.”
A dark brow rose to disappear under his hair. “You admit you and Duke were up to something?”
“Duke was up to something alright, but I wasn’t. All I was guilty of was waiting for you. But I highly doubt you’d believe me right now, so I’m not going to bother to defend myself to you.”
God, she suddenly felt so empty. She wrapped her arms around herself, then winced when she inadvertently touched her arm where Duke had grabbed her.
Connor’s gaze narrowed and searched her face, and for a moment, Kerri thought maybe, maybe they had a chance to get through this nightmare. But then he shrugged and his dark look returned.
“You’re right, darlin’. I wouldn’t believe anything you said. I don’t even know why I’m bothering to waste my time with you now.”
He would’ve continued on his way, but she ran in front of him and put a hand to his chest.
“Oh no you don’t. I’m not done. I want to tell you what you’re right about.”
That got his attention. He stopped and folded his arms across his chest and waited.
She swallowed and pushed through the pain. “You’re right to the extent that you did see what you needed to see. Or should I say, wanted to see. And you know what I think, Connor?”
Disgust curled his lip. “No, Kerri, I don’t, and I don’t rightfully care either.”
“That’s too damn bad, cowboy, because I am going to finish.” Her heart hammered out of control. “You are afraid of commitment.”
He reeled, arms dropping to swing at his sides. “What? You can’t be serious!”
“I am,” she replied. “And you’re afraid, too. Very afraid. That’s why you unconsciously chose Tiffany and Catherine. You knew deep down there was something wrong and that marriage wouldn’t take place.”
His body shook as he stared down at her, and she knew he was barely holding on to his anger. Good.
“If you know so much about me and my love life, then how do you explain Monica?”
“Monica was the start of it all,” she replied. “You did love her, and she did betray you. You never wanted to be hurt like that again, so you chose women who never held that power over you. I’m not saying those break-ups didn’t hurt, but you knew the relationships weren’t going to last almost from the start.”
His jaw worked as he clenched his teeth and drew in a breath. “I see. So I asked Tiffany and Catherine to share my life knowing full well they were going to betray me, and I therefore wouldn’t have to settle down. Is that about right, Dr. Phil? Did I leave anything out?”
He looked at her with so much distaste, she had to fight the urge to step back. “Not quite. And yes,” she said quietly. “You left me out.” Sorrow funneled into her chest and she had to stop to take a breath.
“You did that by yourself, Kerri, when you decided to scheme with Duke.”
God, he was so clueless. She felt sorry for him.
&nb
sp; “I did nothing with Duke, but because your feelings for me are getting too strong for you to handle, you saw what you wanted to see, so you could have a means for an out.”
Dammit. Her vision blurred. She did not want to cry in front of him. He’d only think it was a ploy, anyway. She turned to walk away.
“Oh, hell no. Now it’s my turn.”
His hand closed over her, and he turned her around. Pain banded her arm. She winced and shook free. He’d grabbed right where Duke had. She rubbed the throbbing while he looked from her bruised arm to her face.
“Christ, Kerri. I’m sorry,” he said, regret momentarily replacing his anger. “I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
She shook her head. “You didn’t. It—”
“Jesus! I can see it plain as day.” He cut her off, pointing to the discoloring, anger back to darken his gaze. “I’ve no idea why you’re denying it.”
She opened her mouth, wanting to finish telling him the bruise had been from Duke, but he held his hand up to stop her.
“Save it. You lie about everything. Duke, your arm…whatever. It’s my turn,” he rasped. “So, you’re saying I saw you kissing Duke because my feelings for you are too strong, and I’m afraid of them.”
She wasn’t sure if that was a question or not, but she nodded. He shook his head and laughed without mirth.
“That’s priceless. You’re good. I catch you cheating and you turn it around to make me the bad guy.”
She stepped closer. “It wasn’t like that.”
He ignored her. “Tell me something, Kerri…” He looked down at her, mouth thin, face pale, gaze full of hate and contempt. “Did you really ever stop seeing Duke? I obviously had it right the first time. You did sleep with him that night I walked out. You’ve been playing me all along. And damn, you were good, too. Pretending to be shy and inexperienced.” He stopped, and his eyes narrowed as if he just thought of something. “You probably fucking lied about Lance being gay, as a way to make me feel sorry for you.”
This time, Kerri reeled back as if slapped. “God, I can’t believe you just said that.” Her hand was back on her chest in a vain attempt to block the pain. It didn’t work. She hurt. God, she hurt so bad her body was rapidly turning numb. “I don’t see the point in discussing this anymore since we obviously don’t have a future. Excuse me.”
She pushed him out of the way, ignoring the uncertainty that crept into his eyes. He could think what he wanted. She didn’t care at this point. She had enough trouble trying not to throw up.
Weaving through the crowd, she found a clearing and made her way to a tree. She was dragging in a few breaths when she heard someone call her name.
“Kerri, are you all right?”
She turned to find Brandi heading her way. Her eyes filled with tears, but she swallowed past her hot throat and nodded, then shook her head. “I thought you’d left.”
“I did,” her friend said. “But I had to come back to meet a client to look at some homemade furniture they wanted in their new den I’m designing.”
Kerri nodded, fighting more tears threatening to spill over. “Can you give me a lift home?”
Brandi frowned. “Sure, but…I thought…did something happen between you and Connor?”
“Yeah.” She hiccupped. Darn it. Air funneled into her lungs as she drew in a deep breath. God, she just wanted to get out of there.
“Come on. We can leave now,” Brandi said, and they fell into step together.
The designer kept looking at her, but the woman never asked a thing. She was secretly thanking her friend when they found Jordan and Cole sitting at a quiet table, sharing a funnel cake.
Shoot. She didn’t want to see them…or anyone right now.
“Hey you two,” Cole said.
Jordan smiled. “Brandi, I thought you left.”
“Had to come back, but now I’m leaving again,” she said. “Kerri and I are both heading out.”
Her sister’s head snapped in her direction while Cole’s gaze narrowed on her face, then glanced past her…probably looking for his brother.
“Where’s Connor?”
Yep. She knew it.
She shrugged. “I don’t know. Around I guess.” Somehow she’d kept the tremor from her voice.
Jordan looked at her up and down, then slowly rose to her feet, her concerned gaze boring deep. “Kerri, what happened? What’s going on, and don’t say nothing because I know better.”
Cole stood up to stand behind Jordan, his concerned expression matching her sister’s. “Did you and Connor have a fight?”
A snort bubbled up Kerri’s throat, but came out as another hiccup. Darn it. “Yes,” she answered.
“Kerri, what’s going on?” Jordan asked again. “Your dress is dirty, your arm is bruised and the knuckles on your right hand are swollen. Tell me what happened.”
She should’ve known Jordan would take in all of those things so quickly. Once a cop, always a cop. She sighed.
“Jesus.” Cole stepped closer to look at her arm. “Did Connor do this?”
She shook her head. “No. Of course not.”
Her brother-in-law’s eyes darkened so much she couldn’t tell iris from pupil. “Who?”
“Yeah, Kerri, who?” Brandi stepped closer.
Then Jordan moved until she stood toe to toe. “Who did this, Kerri?”
“Duke,” she replied, knowing it was useless to try to lie to her sister.
“Duke?” Cole and Jordan asked at the same time, both wearing a flush of anger.
Kerri nodded. Cripes. She might as well tell them and be done. “Yes. He grabbed me in the stable and kissed me.”
Cole cursed. “I hope Connor beat the crap out of him.” He shoved a hand through his hair and Kerri was hit with a fierce wave of sadness.
His brother believed her. Why couldn’t Connor have had this kind of reaction? Silently her sadness spilled down her face as she shook her head.
“No, unfortunately your brother chose to think I was enjoying that kiss and was somehow scheming with Duke.”
How could he think that of her after the wonderful day they’d spent together? After all the intimacies they’d shared the past few weeks?
She was just sick inside.
“Oh, Kerri, I am so sorry.” Jordan gently placed her hand on Kerri’s shoulder, and Brandi touched the other.
“That stupid jerk! I don’t know who I am angrier with—Connor or Duke,” Cole rasped as he paced back and forth then stopped. “First, I think I better go pay Duke a visit.” He went to leave, but Kerri grabbed him by the arm and stopped him.
“Don’t! I’ve already taken care of him,” she pleaded, and he looked down at her in confusion. She managed a weak smile. “You don’t think my cop sister wouldn’t teach me a few things?”
A slow grin spread across his face. “I almost feel sorry for Duke.”
Jordan nodded. “You should. Kerri was top of her Kung Fu class and holds a 2nd degree purple belt.” Jordan’s pride showed in her smile. “Tell me what you did.”
“Yeah.” Brandi moved closer. “What did you do?”
Feeling as if it were all a dream, Kerri relayed the rest of the Duke/manure episode to them and managed a small smile at their laughter.
Her throat began to close up again, so she cleared it. “I’m leaving.”
“Okay, hun,” Jordan said. “Where’s your stuff? In Connor’s truck?”
Kerri nodded.
Jordan pushed a curtain of hair over Kerri’s shoulder. “No worries. I’ll drop it off tomorrow.”
She hugged her sister. “Thanks.”
“And I’ll kick my brother’s ass. In fact, I feel the need to do that right now.”
Kerri pushed from her sister’s embrace to grab Cole’s arm and hold tight. Again. “Please don’t bother Connor. He’s feeling betrayed. He’s hurting. He doesn’t need a lecture right now.”
Jeez, listen to her, sticking up for the man who was breaking her heart. But she understood hi
m. Knew what motivated his harsh words. Didn’t make him less of total idiot but she did comprehend.
“What about you?” Cole looked down at her, gaze warm and full of understanding.
She blinked and stepped back. “What about me?”
Jordan slipped her arm through her husband’s and stared at her. “Kerri, you don’t go kissing a man the way you did by the truck earlier today without having some deep feelings for him.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t have feelings for him, but he chose to walk away, not me.” Kerri sighed and swiped at the fresh trail of tears that spilled over at the realization.
Brandi stepped close and took her uninjured hand. “Honey, can’t you do something about it?”
Kerri shrugged. “I tried. He wouldn’t listen. And now, I don’t think I should.” At the trio of frowns that met her gaze. She pushed a lock of hair behind her ear then tried to explain. “Connor’s whole problem with women is trust. He doesn’t trust them, and I can’t get involved with him if I have to worry about him mistaking things all the time.”
Brandi nodded. “I see what you mean.”
“Yeah,” Jordan agreed. “Maybe he just needs time like Cole did, to come around to your way of thinking.”
Cole kissed her sister’s head and the happy couple smirked.
If only it were that simple.
“Well, if you’re ready?” Brandi stepped forward, question in her eyes.
Kerri nodded. She wanted to get out of there so bad. Her head throbbed. Her arm throbbed. Her hand throbbed.
Her heart throbbed. And not in a good way.
She wasn’t going to hold it together much longer. “Yep, let’s go.”
“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Jordan said. “If you need me, call.”
She nodded. “Uh, yeah, except my phone is in my purse behind the seat in Connor’s truck.”
Cole straightened and pulled his phone from his pocket. “Do you want me to call him so I can get your things now?”
God, no. She couldn’t take another meeting with Connor now. She just couldn’t. “No. Tomorrow’s fine.”
“Yeah.” Brandi hooked her arm through Kerri’s uninjured one. “She’s staying with me tonight, so it’s all good.”
Her Unbridled Cowboy (Harland County Series) Page 25