The Loft was surprisingly full that night. Usually the only time there were this many vamps in one room was when Sally threw a party… typically neglecting to tell me about it in advance. They couldn’t really all be that scared to be out on the streets, could they?
Firebird answered my silent question. She’d been otherwise occupied working through a fifth of tequila when she looked up. “I’m telling you, that isn’t just some guy in a mask. I don’t know what it is, but it isn’t human.”
“Oh? So then what is it?” I asked with a straight face.
“I don’t know.”
“I’ve heard rumors of wizards in the city,” Dread Stalker said, glancing around as if daring someone to ridicule him. “Maybe they conjured up something.” If even he was spooked, then this was a pure gravy boat of awesome-sauce.
“Wizards? Did we step into a D&D game when I wasn’t looking?” Unsurprisingly, my question drew blank stares from the crowd. Goddamn, these guys were starved for pop culture.
“What if it’s an Icon?” All heads turned toward Starlight, silence descending upon the room.
Heh. James had mentioned those to me shortly before leaving on whatever business he had. They were some sort of magical warriors, imbued with the power of faith – the same anti-vampire magic that Tom had somehow infused his toy with some months back. Fortunately, they were just as rare, maybe even more so, than Freewills.
Regardless of how absurd it was, though, Starlight had unwittingly given me the perfect setup.
“No fucking way,” Dusk Reaper muttered. “Just… no fucking way. If that’s the case, then we’re all dead meat.”
Make that doubly perfect. Now was the time for my coup de grâce.
“Fine. Maybe it is an Icon, who knows? Stranger shit has happened.” I stood and raised my voice. “If it is, though, I’ll find it and kill it. And if it isn’t, I’ll still find it and kill it. It’s time for this to end.”
All eyes were now on me. There was no doubt in my mind that, long before the sun rose, every single vamp in the coven would have heard about their leader’s awesome bravery. That ought to shut the fuckers up for a while.
“I’ll hunt this thing down, whatever it is. When I do, I’m going to take revenge upon its ass tenfold.” Time to have a little fun… not that I wasn’t already enjoying myself. “As for the rest of you, you call yourselves vampires? You’d better hope when I’m finished with this thing that I don’t decide to come back and take out the rest of my frustration on your cowardly―”
The door opened and Sally walked in, interrupting my badass monologue in one fell swoop, courtesy of the green mini dress she wore. It hugged her body so tight you’d have sworn it was a second layer of skin. The words caught in my throat as my eyes drank in the sight. Talk about a walking distraction.
“My apologies for the interruption, coven master” she said, her tone convincingly repentant despite that being complete bullshit. She was still aiming to keep our asses from being impeached with extreme prejudice.
I gave her an annoyed glare, only half acting. Bitch had ruined a perfectly good tirade on my part. “Your apology is noted. I was just telling our brothers and sisters that the hunter was about to become the hunted. Whatever is stalking Village Coven, be it man, beast, or Icon.”―I threw in that last one just to make them flinch―“is about to learn what happens when you cross the Freewill.”
To my immense satisfaction, a wave of relief passed visibly through the crowd. Their doubt in me appeared to be gone, and in its place I saw the worshipful reverence that I liked to believe I deserved. It was good to be the king.
Unfortunately, Sally had to go and ruin the moment by opening her fucking pie hole. “With all due respect, I believe that’s a mistake.”
“What?” I did my best to mouth “shut the fuck up!” to her as subtly as possible, but she either didn’t understand or was purposely ignoring me.
“We can’t risk you. The Boston prefecture has decreed that you’re too important. There are other warriors in the coven. We can send them instead to…”
“I knew it,” Dusk Reaper said.
“Excuse me?” she asked.
“This is all a ruse.”
“I don’t know what you’re…”
“Liar!” he spat. “Do you think us stupid enough to fall for these lies?”
What?! Oh fuck! Don’t tell me the shit-for-brains actually figured out what I was trying to do.
“Hear me, brothers and sisters,” he said, turning to face the others. “Our so-called master is weak.”
Oh crap.
“He never intended to hunt down our enemy. His bravery is only a false front meant to deceive us. Can’t you see that this was his plan all along? I say he conspired with Sally Sunset to…”
“What did you call me?” Sally asked, her eyes narrowing.
“The name our true master, Night Razor, bestowed upon you.”
Shit had just gotten real. Of all the stupid code names that had been handed out to Village Coven by the old regime, hers had potentially been the worst. She’d kept her first name, but had made it clear that the Sunset part was to be dropped lest she drop whoever dared utter it.
“Why you little―”
But Dusk Reaper wasn’t quite done yet. He stepped back, pointing an accusing finger at her. “Confess! You and the Freewill devised this ruse. Did you think we wouldn’t notice your convenient timing - stepping in and stopping him from hunting an enemy he never intended to face? I say all of this was so you could save his pathetic life at the expense of sacrificing more of ours.”
That’s what he thought I was doing? Guess he really was as dumb as he looked.
Or maybe not. Judging by the angry glares reappearing throughout the crowd, he’d definitely struck a chord.
“Oh?” Sally asked, her voice flat with anger. “Is that so?”
“Do you deny it?”
“I do. I say the Freewill is no coward. He wouldn’t hide behind such a sad little conspiracy.”
“Actions speak louder than words, bitch.”
Oh boy. This was getting ugly fast. Why the fuck did she have to come over when she did? I had been just about to seal the deal.
“I think I see what this is really about,” she said. “You think you’d make a better master than Bill, don’t you?”
Dusk Reaper smiled in return. “I do, for I would lead us in Night Razor’s name and continue his ways.” He turned to the others and raised his voice again. “The killing, the blood, the fun! Who remembers that?”
All of the guys in the room nodded, most of the ladies too. In fact, only Sally, me, and―interestingly enough―Starlight seemed to not find that idea too peachy keen.
“Very well,” Sally replied, her tone betraying no sense of urgency. “Then as you yourself said, actions speak louder than words.”
Oh no. The crazy bitch was gonna suggest a trial by combat between us. Dusk Reaper might have been a pussy at heart, but he was still a great deal more experienced than me. I opened my mouth to say something, but she picked that moment to continue.
“Village Coven is under siege and it needs to end now. What I propose is simple enough. You and the Freewill will compete to see who finds and ends this threat first. The winner will be acknowledged as the one true master of this coven.”
A BREAK BEFORE THE BLOOD SPILLS
Silence reigned in the room for several seconds. I glanced at Dusk Reaper and saw a glimmer of doubt in his eye, but he noticed me staring and quickly covered it.
“So be it,” he said. “We will find this―”
“There is no we,” Sally interrupted. “This will be a contest between the two of you.”
Oh, I could tell Dusk Reaper didn’t like that one bit, but he was in too deep to back down now. “Very well, but how do I know this isn’t another trick?”
To my surprise, Sally crossed the room to where he stood. I found myself hoping she was gonna give him the mother of all cock punches, but instead
she stood upon her tiptoes and leaned in to his ear. She whispered something, too low for even my hearing to pick up.
When she stepped back, he was smiling. “Rejoice, for soon we shall once again own the night!”
Goddamn, the formal speech he used when trying to sound important really irked me… almost as much as Douche Reaper himself. I didn’t know what Sally told him, but I had to trust it was good… maybe a free blowjob or something. That sure as shit would’ve convinced me.
Regardless, this was workable. I could still salvage Tom’s plan and end this in my favor.
But first I would need to teach Dusk Reaper a lesson.
* * *
Okay, first, I needed to have a little word with Sally. It was getting late… or early; I still didn’t have my brain wrapped around vamp hours. Either way, not much would be happening this night. I mean, Dusk Reaper could start his hunt whenever the fuck he wanted to. Hell, if I so chose, he could stand out on a street corner for the next week trying to ambush our so-called stalker. The truth was, nothing was going to happen until I put my costume on and made an appearance. The only way Dusk Reaper could try winning otherwise was if he decided to start killing random dudes dressed in black and then pass them off as me―which, knowing the idiot, he might. Ugh, I so despised being master over such a group of vacuous dipshits.
The coven appeared mollified by our competition, which was apparently as good as I was destined to get. After I short while, I slipped away, managing to catch up with Sally as she walked back toward the Office.
I casually sauntered up to her. “Nice night.”
“Yep.”
“Heading back to the Office?”
“Still plenty of work to be done there,” she replied in a matter of fact tone.
“So… what did you say to Reaper?”
“And why is it any of your business?”
“As coven master, I could order you to divulge.”
“You could. And as your partner, I could tell you to take a flying fuck off the nearest building.”
“True enough,” I replied, continuing our leisurely pace through the city streets. “But, I’m gonna ask anyway.”
“It’s simple,” she said, turning to face me. “I told him what he wanted to hear. I stroked his ego a bit, dangled the carrot of coven leadership in front of his face. Think about it. It’s a tantalizing prize for a self-absorbed asshole like him. This way he also doesn’t have to face you in fair combat.”
I considered what that could entail. Vampires had a pretty fucked up concept of fair. “He’d probably win.”
“Yes, but he doesn’t know that. He has just enough doubt to be a fly in the ointment, but not quite enough to man up and grow a set on his own.”
“But he agreed to this hunt.”
She turned with a grin and continued walking. “Of course. Nobody said this hunt had to be even remotely fair, did they?”
Using that logic, it would be best for me to watch the skies for the inevitable nuclear strike.
We walked for a few more minutes in relative silence then, just for argument’s sake, I decided to test the waters a bit. “But what if he wins?”
“That would suck.”
“It would...”
“For him.”
“Huh? How?”
“Do you honestly think the rest of this group is going to tolerate that asshole being in charge for long? I’d give him a month tops before he ends up dust in the wind. Hell, I might even do it myself if it came down to that, but it won’t.”
“It won’t?”
“Nope, because you’re going to win.”
“How do you know?”
“I was standing at the door listening for a few moments. I heard you. You weren’t afraid.”
Uh oh. I needed to play this coy. Unlike the rest, Sally was sharp―sharper than any blade I’d ever seen. “Maybe I’m too stupid to be.”
“I leave that as a distinct possibility, but I prefer to think that maybe you’re starting to get the hint of how things work. I think maybe, just maybe, you’re beginning to believe in yourself as a vampire.” She glanced my way and smiled, for once not displaying her normal shark-like attitude. “If that’s the case, then I should too.”
“Really?”
“I mean it.”
I was touched. Holy shit. This was a side of Sally I hadn’t seen before.
I’d been planning on spilling my guts to her about the vigilante as well as the plan my roommates and I had concocted, but now I hesitated. Who would it really hurt to play out this ruse? Well, Dusk Reaper for sure, but fuck him.
The thing was, Sally actually had a little faith in me―even when I didn’t. I hadn’t a clue why. Hell, I wasn’t even sure it was possible. Nevertheless, a part of me didn’t want to let her down. Everything I was doing was bullshit, an act meant to save my own ass, but maybe her belief in me could inspire me to become more. Maybe in time I could be the person she believed me to be… assuming that person wasn’t a cold-blooded murderer of course.
I moved closer and made to put my arm around her shoulder, but a quick sidelong glare told me we weren’t quite at that level yet. Oh well. I’d work on that one.
For now, hopefully it was enough for me to say, “I won’t let you down.”
THE THRILL OF THE HUNT
I decided to let Dusk Reaper stew for the night. Hopefully he’d found some dank alley to stand around and look impotent in. Me, I hopped on the subway and headed for home. I’d left my outfit there and, also, I needed to fill my two personal sidekicks in on the plan change.
Once home, well, I decided to get some sleep first. I’m not a fucking moron. An all-day planning session on how to best set up Dork Reaper was best tackled if I wasn’t dead tired. I tell ya, even with my vampire physiology I still had no idea how superheroes did it. You’d think at some point Nick Fury would just crash the fucking helicarrier into the side of a mountain because he fell asleep at the wheel.
Anyway, late morning found us sitting in our living room with me giving them the lowdown on the night ahead.
“This could work out even better than we originally planned,” Tom admitted. “If you lay this asshat out and then manage to defeat”―he held up his fingers in air quotes―“the stalker yourself, well, I’m pretty sure that’s the last peep you’re ever gonna hear out of him.”
“I doubt it, but at least he probably won’t be able to cause me any more trouble. His credibility will be shot to shit.”
“Okay, so let’s do this.”
I held up a hand. “Not so fast. Sally was good enough to warn me that it was pretty much anything goes as far as this hunt was concerned. It’s possible Reaper could be armed… hell, knowing this limp-dick, it’s more than likely. I can handle a knife or a lead pipe, but if he’s packing heat then that could be trouble.”
“Agreed,” Ed said. “Sounds like we need to scout him out in advance.”
I considered his words. I wasn’t keen on involving them, being that they were both human and thus a lot squishier than me. Conversely, they’d proven their mettle against Jeff. Also, if I said no, the fuckers would probably just follow me anyway. At least this way I could keep an eye on them.
“Fine. I won’t lie. I could use both your help on this one. This isn’t just about running interference with Dusk Reaper. This is the end game. Tonight, I finally destroy the scourge of the vampire race once and for all. It needs to look good.”
“I’m in,” Ed said with no hesitation.
“Fuck yeah,” Tom added.
“Awesome. You guys are my Bucky and Speedy.”
Ed raised an eyebrow. “Um, let’s not use those names.”
“You’re right,” I replied. “They’re already taken anyway. I know. You’re my Faggy and Douchey. I’ll leave it up to you to decide who’s who.”
Tom was quick to fire off, “Dibs on Douchey.”
Ed was equally quick to raise both his middle fingers. The pact thus sealed, we raised our beer can
s to the victory that was ours for the taking.
* * *
The downside of having humans for roommates was their obvious disadvantage in a fight against creatures who could punch holes through cinderblock. The upside, though, was that they were nothing but cattle to most vampires. That made them beneath contempt and thus practically invisible. It also didn’t hurt that the only other still-living (sorta) member of the coven who’d met them was Sally and she wasn’t a part of this. As a result, I had what amounted to the equivalent of ninjas on my side, minus maybe any fighting ability.
The first part of our plan had been to ascertain where Dusk Reaper was hunting that night. I mean, it was a big city and even with vampire senses I could have gone days without crossing his path and that was just within our territory.
Rather than overthink this, I simply stopped by the Loft. As expected, it wasn’t empty, although it wasn’t nearly as full as the night before. Guess the rest of the coven had decided to hole up elsewhere while Reaper and I conducted our manhunt. Of course, it was also possible that Sally had put their asses to work over at the Office and the folks here were just the lucky ones who’d escaped.
Either way, a few curious eyeballs turned my way. It was far better than angry glares.
Finally, Eliza asked me, “Aren’t you going out hunting? Dusk Reaper is gonna find this guy first if you don’t.”
Interestingly enough, her tone wasn’t dripping with fondness at the mention of his name. Sally had once mentioned to me that a good hate fuck could be a wild thing every so often. Maybe that was the case here. Or maybe the asshole just couldn’t get it up. Yeah, I definitely preferred that scenario.
“Afraid he’ll win?” I asked casually.
She looked uncomfortable for a moment, as if she didn’t want to say anything, but then apparently thought better of it. “Kinda. I mean he’s fun to hang with, but I don’t really want to go back to the way it was.”
I was going to question that, but then I remembered the sensation of Night Razor’s fist ramming into my face with the force of a jackhammer. It was something I was certain most of them had felt at some point or another. “Don’t worry. Neither do I.”
Night Stalker: from the Tome of Bill Series Page 7