by Max Lockwood
“What do babies need, anyway?” Matthew asked.
“The hell if I know.” Lucas laughed. “Maybe some toys or something. You gotta keep that thing entertained or it’s going to cry all the time.”
“Ugh,” Matthew groaned, not ready to deal with crying children. He picked up a tiny stuffed monkey and tucked it into his back pocket. He hoped it would be enough for the child because there was no more room in his bag.
Once he was finished with the baby things, he jumped the pharmacy counter to join Lucas. He found his companion standing at a table, large bottles surrounding him. Lucas had broken out into a sweat as he tried to make sense of the different types of medications.
Matthew grabbed the bottles and squinted to read the small print in the dim light. He placed some on a separate counter while tossing others in the trash.
“Okay, I think this one is for arthritis,” Matthew said, tossing it in the trash. “I’m sure we can get along without it.”
“What do you think this is?” Lucas asked. “The pills are humongous.”
Matthew’s eyes lit up. “Oh, I’m almost certain those are antibiotics. We should keep those.”
“Noted,” Lucas said, tossing the bottle into a plastic sack. “Man, how do you know all of this stuff?”
“I used to bunk with an army medic,” he replied, tossing a bottle he didn’t recognize into the trash. “He was constantly studying.”
“Cool,” he replied as Matthew found the jar that sourced Genevieve’s pain pills. “What the heck do you think these things are?”
Matthew scoffed. He was no expert with women’s things, but even he knew what birth control looked like. Lucas’s face went pink when he explained what he was holding.
“I’ll take a few, just in case,” he muttered, stuffing the compacts into the sack. “That reminds me, do you have any advice for me? I know you’re not much older than me, but I’m not sure what I’m doing.”
Matthew crinkled his brow. “Advice? Are you still talking about those pills?”
“No, no,” Lucas said quickly, shaking his head. “I’m wondering if you can help me with a little problem I’m having. It’s Genevieve.”
Matthew sighed. They hadn’t been under the same roof for more than a week and the residents were already having problems. He wasn’t a conflict resolver. In fact, Matthew liked to avoid any and all conflict. When two people were fighting in his presence, he was more likely to duck out of the room than try to help. When he got into arguments, he usually tried to joke his way out of it or apologize immediately. Now, he was expected to pick sides and he didn’t even know what the problem was.
“You’re having a problem with Genevieve?” he asked exasperatedly. “I thought you guys were getting along.”
“No, we are,” Lucas said, looking confused. “That’s the problem. I like Genevieve—like, more than a friend. I was wondering if you had any advice for me.”
Matthew exhaled, letting his cheeks puff up. “I don’t know what to tell you. I don’t think I have the qualifications to give advice.”
“No?” he asked. “Sorry. I don’t know where I got that idea.”
Matthew pursed his lips. He felt bad for Lucas, who was clearly preoccupied with his little problem. At the very least, he could hear him out, then give him generic advice. Matthew just hoped he wouldn’t ask about anything too specific or personal.
“Okay, what’s the problem?” he asked reluctantly.
Lucas set down the plastic tubs and gripped the edge of the counter. “Okay, so we’ve been talking a lot lately. Mostly, it’s because she’s too shy to speak English in front of people and she gets bored with being quiet. But the more we talk, the more I like her. She’s pretty funny once you get to know her. That, and she’s a total babe.”
Matthew nodded. He wouldn’t deny the fact that Genevieve was cute. But Matthew didn’t know enough about her to give any personalized advice. In fact, Lucas probably knew her the best out of anyone.
“Have you told her how you feel?” Matthew asked. If anyone could get a girl, he figured it would be Lucas. He had those classic good looks that women seemed to love.
“No, I’m too scared,” he said meekly. “Let’s face it, we’re not in an ideal situation. If she’s not interested, then we’ll have to share the same space for the indefinite future. That could get really awkward, especially since I’m the only one who speaks her language.”
“Then why risk it at all?” Matthew sighed. He didn’t feel like the middle of a zombie apocalypse was the right time or place for a love connection.
“I don’t know.” He groaned, rubbing the back of his neck. “I just have this feeling inside me that’s going to drive me nuts if nothing ever happens. Do you know what I mean?”
Matthew understood. It was a longing in one’s stomach that burned brighter whenever that special person was around. It was a need to be close to someone you cared about. Left alone, the feeling would fester, completely occluding the mind. He knew the feeling well, even though it had been years since he’d crushed on a woman.
“Look, you’re both two good-looking people. I’m sure you can make it work,” Matthew replied.
“But she’s so far out of my league,” Lucas whined. “First of all, she’s pretty hot. Second of all, she’s incredibly smart. I can’t understand half the stuff she says, and that’s not the language barrier. Has she told you about any of her work?”
Matthew shook his head. He knew she was a scientist, but didn’t know much beyond that.
“Well, her specialty is in contagious diseases. She had a PhD in Biology, but after working a few years, she went back to school and got a Master’s in Sociology and Public Health. She came to the United States to work as a temporary consultant for the CDC. A lot of her work revolves around how to prevent disease, especially in large populations. She was here to work on new guidelines for epidemics but got stuck here. Pretty crazy stuff.”
“Wow,” Matthew replied. “Does she know anything about the zombie disease?”
“That’s just it,” Lucas said. “She said that it’s possible for something to be done, but there hasn’t been any way to study it. Since we’re all running around like chickens with their heads cut off, she doesn’t think that anyone has been able to work on this.”
“Damn,” Matthew breathed. He wondered if there was any way they could set up a lab in the office building. There was more than enough space available. He was daydreaming about stealing microscopes and beakers when Lucas cleared his throat.
“Sorry, what were you saying?”
“I’m saying she’s out of my league. She’s way too good for me. She’s a genius and the only thing I’m good at is football.”
“And speaking French,” Matthew added.
“Okay, two things,” Lucas corrected. “I doubt Genevieve has ever watched an American football game in her life. She has no reason to be interested in me. Even though I know this, I still can’t stop thinking about her. Help me.”
Matthew set his bag of drugs down on the counter and looked Lucas in the eye.
“Fine,” he relented. “I’ve been in the same situation and I know how it feels.”
“Really?” Lucas said, his eyes lighting up.
Matthew nodded. “You’ve got to stop putting yourself down. While I don’t understand a word you two say to each other, I can tell that there’s a connection between you two. She seems to like you.”
“As a friend.”
Matthew shrugged. “I once thought the same thing about an amazing woman. She was gorgeous and the life of the party. She was smart and witty and tough as nails. She was everything I wanted in a companion. I used to sit at home and mope because I was so infatuated with her and terrified to tell her. It was pretty miserable.”
“This isn’t what I want to hear,” Lucas moaned.
“Just wait.” Matthew chuckled. “Eventually, I stopped stressing about her and just tried to be her friend. If it turned into something more, gre
at. If it didn’t, at least I’d have a badass female friend. Apparently, it was just meant to be. She stood by my side through a lot of crap and eventually agreed to marry me. Sometimes, these things just work out. I don’t have a ton of experience, so I can’t give you all the plays, but you’ve got to be your authentic self. If she happens to be a good match, it’ll work out. When you’re ready, tell her how you feel. As long as you respect her response, I’m sure things will be fine.”
Lucas nodded. “Okay, I’ll do that. Thanks.”
“No problem,” Matthew said, tying the handles of the plastic bag into a knot.
“So, your wife . . . ?” Lucas started.
Matthew’s stomach dropped. He hadn’t discussed Rebecca with anyone he’d met since she passed away. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to talk about her. If he happened to tear up or get too emotional, he worried that the others would think he was weak and unfit for a leadership position. That, and he wasn’t an open book, even before his wife died.
“Did something happen with the zombies?” Lucas asked carefully.
Matthew nodded before looking straight at the ground. He focused on closing himself off from his emotional brain. Taking slow, even breaths, he closed her out of his mind the best he could.
“I’m so sorry, man,” Lucas said softly.
“Thanks,” Matthew said.
“I can’t imagine how you feel.”
“It’s hard,” Matthew admitted. “She meant a lot to me. I was right there when it happened and I still feel like I could have stopped it.”
Matthew bit his tongue. He had already said more than he wanted to. Lucas was only asking about girl advice—he didn’t want to hear about Matthew’s baggage. It was the war stories problem all over again. He would certainly alienate himself if he chose to talk about topics no one really wanted to hear about. He stood up and tossed the remaining mystery pills in the trash.
“Do you think we have everything we came here for?” Matthew asked, looking at his watch. They had spent longer in the pharmacy than he would have liked. He didn’t want the others to worry.
“Yep, I think so,” Lucas said brightly, trying to overcompensate for asking difficult questions.
“Good. Let’s show everyone what we rounded up.”
“They’d better be pleased with us,” Lucas said. “This is more shopping than I’ve done in my entire lifetime.”
Carefully checking around the front door, they made their way back to the office. As far as they could tell, there were no zombies in the immediate area. Smoke billowed somewhere in the distance, and the air was thick and acrid. Matthew couldn’t tell if it was a sign of life or an accident caused by the zombies.
As they walked briskly through the empty street, Matthew felt Lucas’s hand pat him on the shoulder.
“I know it doesn’t mean much coming from me, but I’m sure you’re being too hard on yourself for what happened to your wife. I wasn’t there and I don’t know how it went down, but you don’t seem like the kind of guy who wouldn’t give less than one hundred percent of effort in any situation. It’s hard, but I hope you can forgive yourself. I just know that it’s not healthy to blame yourself for things outside your control.”
Matthew pursed his lips. “Thanks,” he said softly. He appreciated the sentiment but wondered if Lucas would be saying the same thing if he had been in the restaurant that day. He cleared his throat, ready for a topic change.
“Good luck with Genevieve. I guess I don’t know her very well, but I’ve noticed that she’s been much happier since you guys joined us. I can’t really give you hope that things are going to work out, but I think you’ve got as much as a chance as anyone. For what it’s worth, I hope you two figure out how to be happy together.”
Lucas grinned. “Thanks, man.”
Matthew returned the smile, but it felt hollow. While he generally wanted people to be happy, he felt like his words were filled with air. He didn’t think he could feel jealousy—after all, he wasn’t interested in Genevieve like that. But there was something below the surface that he couldn’t name.
Matthew felt like he had gotten a good opportunity to learn more about Lucas, but so much of the conversation felt meaningless. He felt his relationship advice fell flat and he certainly couldn’t begin to believe anything Lucas told him about not feeling guilt. All in all, the trip went better than he ever expected. If nothing else, Matthew managed to earn a little respect as a group member. At the very least, he was able to provide sustenance for the others. Everyone was in a better mood when their stomachs were full.
Matthew rapped on the door, thankful that everyone made it inside in one piece. He waited for Ellie to open the door with a look of relief on her face, as she always worried when Matthew made heroic plans. Instead, she wrenched the door open, her eyes wide with worry.
“Come in,” she said, pulling Matthew forward by the front of his shirt. “We’ve got a situation.”
18
Matthew pushed past Ellie and found the others, minus Genevieve, standing in a circle. Ellie nervously clutched her gun, rushing to join the others once the door was shut.
“What the hell happened?” Matthew shouted, his voice echoing from the walls of the atrium.
In the center of the circle stood Sally, clutching her child and weeping. Tears poured down her cheeks, soaking the baby’s hat.
His stomach filled with dread. If he’d misjudged Sally and she turned out to be dangerous, it would be his fault. Had he become so soft that he assumed that a young mother wouldn’t be a risk to the others? He knew so little about her, but in the time he spoke to her, he figured she was tired and hungry, not out for blood.
But he knew he couldn’t be too sure of strangers, especially in these tough times. He remembered Ellie talking about a man who assaulted her, only because there was no one around to stop him. Matthew was horrified by the story, but he’d chalked it up to one bad egg in a sea of very desperate people. He didn’t expect the same from a weary woman.
“Who said she could come in here?” Sergio asked. He was pointing a gun at Sally, his finger too close to the trigger. Carl stood next to him, holding Sally’s dagger. On his other side, Pip stood menacingly with her axe, the blade resting on the ground.
“I–I did,” Matthew stuttered. “That wasn’t that long ago. What happened since then?”
“Why didn’t you ask any of us first?” Carl questioned. “A little heads-up would be good.”
Matthew looked to Pip and raised his hands in exasperation before dropping them to his thighs.
“I did discuss it with Pip,” he argued. “She didn’t give me a definite yes or no, so I had to make the final call. Sally promised that she wouldn’t hurt us, and I told her that we had no interest in hurting her. Before Lucas and I raided the drugstore, I told Pip to take her back here and explain what was going on. I trusted her to do so because she had already filled her bags and had nothing better to do.”
Pip frowned and looked at the floor. “I didn’t say anything because I didn’t trust her. I was too freaked out by nearly getting stabbed to say anything. What if she got mad at me?”
“I wasn’t going to hurt you,” Sally sobbed. “Please, just let me go. I don’t want any trouble.”
“Wait,” Matthew said, holding his hand out. “You never told me what she did. If we’re going to kick her out, I at least want to know the reason.”
Pip huffed and stomped her feet around. Since she didn’t want to respond, Sergio spoke for her.
“She’s been acting suspicious,” he sighed. “She won’t answer our questions. We just wanted to know if she was armed. Carl had to pull the knife off her because she didn’t make us immediately aware of it. We asked her if she had any other weapons on her. She said no, but we don’t believe it. We asked her to turn out her pockets and she refused. We were about to frisk her, but she lost her damn mind and started yelling and screaming.”
Matthew frowned. “Is this true?” he asked her.
“That’s fine,” Matthew said. “Just turn out your pockets. I don’t see what’s wrong with that.”
She shook her head. “I don’t have anything dangerous. I don’t have anything that you want. Please, just leave me alone.”
Matthew noticed a bulge in the pocket of her baby carrier. He didn’t notice it before because her arms were wrapped around her child. But when she held out her hands in defense, he could see that there was something definitely there. The padding from the carrier made it hard to tell what it was, but Matthew had to agree that it was suspicious.
“Please, Sally,” he sighed. “We can see there’s something by the baby. What is it?”
“That’s what we’re trying to figure out,” Carl said, his teeth gritted. “I don’t like it. What if she’s got an explosive under there?”
“I would never hurt myself or my baby,” Sally said fiercely. “I have higher standards than that.”
“Then tell us what you have already,” Pip said, fed up with the back and forth. “I don’t want to deal with this anymore. I just want to sit down and relax. It’s been a stressful morning and we’re all tired. I think we should push her out of here and get on with our lives.”
Carl and Sergio nodded in agreement. They were on high alert, ready to defend the others if Sally proved to be more than they could handle. Matthew would have been right there with them if he didn’t have a feeling they were overreacting.
“I don’t think she would do anything stupid,” Matthew said. “Obviously, she doesn’t want anything to happen to the baby. I think she’s just nervous. I know I would be if a bunch of people were pointing weapons at me.”
“Then she should be honest with us,” Sergio said. “She’s giving us no reason to trust her.”