by J. S. Wilder
He gets up to go to the toilet. I wait as I start to bite my nails. I half expect to see Hudson for another match. He comes back with a new shirt and he has generally tidied himself up. I say nothing as he carries our bags out of the terminal and into the car.
Henry, his devoted driver is waiting for us as usual. He greets me with the usual lifeless stare and doesn’t say a word to Roy. It’s twelve in the afternoon and so far I’ve been to Paris and back in one morning. I was dying to go there and I never even got past the airport. I’ve had one too many to drink and Roy’s been in a fight. What for, I’m unclear. Were they really fighting over me?
He never looks at me. Simply holds my hand every time we have to move. First from the plane to the terminal and he only time he let go was when he went to the toilet on the plane. I’m tired and tipsy. As soon as I hit the limo seat I fall asleep. I’m tired of the silence and possibly tired of him.
Chapter Sixteen
“Deborah, we’re at the house, wake up.”
I don’t want to wake because we are going to talk. I squeeze my eyes shut and pretend I’m in Paris on the Eiffel Tower being proposed to by Roy. Yes, that’s what’s really happening. We make love in my mind so many ways and each time it’s better than the last. I hear Roy’s car door open and shut. Then I know it’s my cue to go into the house. Great!
As I enter Betty has a face of disappointment as she brushes past us. She doesn’t greet us like she normally does. I’m relieved that she merely looks at me and says nothing. He grabs my hand and takes us down to our room. Holding my hand, firmly and tightly. Fear starts to crawl into my spine as he breathes frantically.
Shit, he’s mad!
My fears are confirmed as he slams the door shut. He holds me tight and he’s talking, but it feels like a dragon puffing fire. ”I’m going to fuck some sense into you.”
He tugs at my dress, ripping it as if he’s reliving the fight with Hudson. I whisper, “No,” as he does it, but it’s weak, faint and pathetic. My heart’s racing, my stomach’s turning from drinking so much early in the morning and my heart is aching for him.
I was kidding myself to think otherwise. That I could walk out of the door and never look back. Every seam of my dress is torn, every piece of the polyester dress looks like broken glass splintered all over the floor. He treads on it as if he’s making a statement loud and clear. I wore this dress for him. I thought it was beautiful and now he is defacing it. Ripping it apart. My weak hands are trying to defend me.
I hate it.
No, I hate him.
“Don’t!” He shouts while he holds my breasts in his hands like they are melons and his fingernails are the knife that is to cut out the juice. He does the same with my bra, shreds off me with such force. He wants me to be scared, but it has the opposite effect. I’m not frightened, fear finds a way out of my heart, the moment I look at the red velvet carpet and see my dress ripped to shreds – it turns me on.
I want him to fuck some sense into me.
Oh yeah, this is a whole new level.
He does the same thing with my thongs. I stand with my knees shaking at his every move. Every slash, I want to oppose before I even get the chance he’s finished and then I need him to finish me off.
I push him against the door and I envelope his mouth with my mouth. I’m hot and ready for him to fuck me senseless. He doesn’t want me to take control so he swaps sides and has me on the door with my breasts bouncing up and down like jelly.
Our tongues injecting each other’s mouths with urgency. My hands in his hair feeling the heat flowing from his head to his feet. I’m sweating, engaging in his heat as well as mine. He releases his cock and I lift up my legs and wrap them around him like a bow around a gift.
His dick is mine and mine to use as I please, when I want and that is right now. Right here and now, he will pump me because I am his. He knows that I need him and only he can pleasure me.
He bashes his hips against mine. Roughly. Forcibly. He’s not concerned about how I feel he just wants me and he takes me. The harder he thrusts against me, the more I cry out. This is no longer pleasure, it’s turning into pain. I scream in agony and the more I cry out, the harder he pumps into me. He doesn’t even take his cock out, he just pushes it inside me deeper and deeper.
“Roy, please!” I cry as I try to squirm out of his grip like a worm. He has no intention of being gentle.
“This is what happens when you defy me.”
I yell harder, hoping the staff will at least come to my rescue. No one will interfere. Everyone will turn a blind eye to what is going on. They always do. The privacy of the Sparks was like the best-kept secret in the world. He knows it and he takes full advantage of me.
His rhythm is louder and harder and I can hear our bones banging against each other. As my screeches increase, he forces his tongue inside my mouth to keep me quiet and then he holds my tongue. He sucks it up like a hoover and holds on to it until he shoots up inside me like a lethal injection.
He shivers and drops me. I plummet to the ground and cry. He looks at me like I am the most despicable thing in the world and says, “Don’t you ever do that to me again.”
I don’t even need to ask him what I’d done. I had believed someone’s word over his and he refused to let me go. I was his, trapped in my mind, body and soul. He wants me to never to forget it and he gave me a taste of how he will punish me for doing so.
Chapter Seventeen
“Come, lay with me.”
I get up from the floor with the remnants of my ripped clothing and join him on the bed. He’s lying down naked, after washing himself off in the bathroom. I do the same, I’m very sore. A little relieved but still in a bit of pain. He turns around for a brief moment so I can see the scares on his back. “Look what you did! Come.”
The idea that I crawled him and it hurt the way it should have done, makes me feel that at least he got a little taste of his own medicine.
I approach the bed slowly debating whether to sit or just get the fuck out of here. Shit, he hurt me so much. My body is aching from when he took me. I can still feel my pussy throbbing from the force.
“You made me cry!” he blurts out as he looks up at me. He stares at me directly in the eyes and the words bounce of my ears.
“You practically forced yourself on me!”
He shakes his head in denial, “If I did you wouldn’t be lying on the bed.”
I was laying on the other side of the bed as far away from him as possible. Which was silly in the grand scheme of things.
“I was rough. You hurt me. I needed you to know what it felt like.” He moves closer to me. I keep my eyes on him trying not show any emotion as he’s only a heartbeat from me. He starts to put my lose hair strands in place behind my ears like he does whenever he’s next to me. My hair’s a bit coarse especially when it’s not blow dried, being mixed race it still has a bit of the African kink in it. Especially now, it looks wild. Instead, Roy is looking at me like a tamed animal. Someone he wants to calm down. As he kisses my forehead I close my eyes. I can’t open them, when he’s just a few millimetres away from my lips.
“I’m standing there waiting for you, excited about our plans... our plans for the weekend. I had two meetings, I had them early so that when you came I could spend time with you. I was like an excited kid about spending time with you, I couldn’t even focus in the meetings.”
He kisses my lips and I keep my eyes closed. To digest what he’s saying and not be mesmerized by his emerald eyes staring into mine.
“I get a text from Hudson. He sent a photo of you, in the dress.” I thought he was looking at something on his phone. I noticed when he put the phone up, but didn’t realise. The sneaky bastard, the sneaky little shit. He kisses my lips again. “I started to get pissed and paranoid. You with him. Drinking. I was going wild, waiting and waiting.” He brushed his lips against mine.
“Then, came the kiss. A photo from an unknown number. You came through and I was f
ucking annoyed,” he kisses me again this time smoothing my hair down.
“You’re so beautiful. You’re mine.”
I open my eyes to look at him. He seems startled.
“So, why lie?”
He pushes himself back to look at me directly. “Lie?” he says as he raises an eyebrow.
“You told me, you wanted us to be together and who do I see on the plane. He gets up in anger.
“Sometimes, Deborah Withers, you’re so stupid.”
“What?” I screech out loud. He’s insulting me?
“If you’re going to act so dumb, maybe you’re not the woman I thought you were, maybe—”
“You need to be with Stephie?”
That’s the woman he thinks I am, but I’m nothing like her – I’m not beautiful, intelligent or anything else.
I’m just a mixed race, geek trying to act like a beautiful butterfly. To think that Roy will ever be interested in someone like me as a partner is just ridiculous. Roy puts on his clothes and storms out of the room. I don’t even try to stop him. I sit on the bed deflated thinking about all that he has said.
The photo, the bar, Hudson taking photos and I realise Roy is right.
I am stupid.
Chapter Eighteen
I wake up and shower. One of the girl’s knock on the door to ask about brunch and if I’d be having any? She looks on the floor to see my ripped dress and her eyes widen at the sight of it. I pretend not to notice and agree to come up. I left my dress there in case Roy came back but he never did.
Then again, why would he?
Eagerly I change in case Roy’s in the house and I make my way up the stairs in my summer dress to the dining room. I debate about what to wear and realise that she never said anything about anyone joining me, so it will most likely be only me eating. Betty doesn’t do brunch. She has her three meals with her new slim figure, she doesn’t want it to change. She worked hard with Peter to get to a size twelve. I still can’t believe the chubby housemaid is a sexy diva these days. As I make my way to the top of the stairs some maids greet me and smile weakly. I return their greeting with a half-smile of my own and open the door and hold my breath as I see his face. He’s wearing his deep blue suit and white shirt. He looks rested unlike before and he’s had a shower. His eye has healed up a little bit. I can hardly tell that a few hours ago he was in a fight. I rush over to him and at first he resists and then he gently presses his lips against mine.
There’s only one word I can think to say and that is, “Sorry.”
He brushes his hands against my face and holds me in close. He hugs me like we’ve been reunited for the first time.
“Can we go back?” I whisper in his ear.
“What?” he pushes me away to see if I’m serious. I fucked up and I want another chance. He owes me that. I had been toyed with. Shit, I’m not used to this world.
“I want to learn, I want you to show me.”
He nods and replies, “Next weekend maybe, I’m exhausted now. Let’s eat.”
My eyes dart across the table and I realise that Betty isn’t there. We’re alone.
“Outside?”
“Sorry?”
“I want to eat on the decking outside.” I need fresh air. Not be cooped up in this room. Not now. I peeped out of the window when I came up the stairs and for once the British summertime is actually hot and I want to take full advantage of it. I’m wearing my cream crossed summer dress with my breasts partially exposed and my hair tied up in a bun.
He comes behind me as I make my way out of the door and says, “You look so hot in that dress, I could fuck you right here and now.”
I whisper back, “Why don’t you?”
While Michelle takes the rest of our food outside for us to eat, he yanks down his trousers and lifts up my dress, shocked to discover that I have no underwear on. As he gasps and grabs my arse.
“Someone, came prepared,” he whispers and he starts to rub his erection against my leg.
My pussy starts to drip anticipating his cock, which he thrusts inside of me. This time out of desire and with each thrust he claims how much he loves me and I return the same longings to him. It doesn’t take long for both of us to cum. I hug him and beg for his forgiveness as his cock withers and returns to its normal length.
“I love you. Forgive me.”
“You were forgiven the moment I sat next to you on the way back home.”
“I don’t want to live here anymore.” I know that being under this roof and in this house, the one he shared with her is making me feel like this. It was her family home and visions of her walking down the stairs are playing tricks on my mind.
“You won’t have to for much longer. Let’s have brunch and talk.” He returns my kiss and holds my hand. We stroll outside to eat like lovers. Betty has some relatives in Scotland and has decided to spend the summer visiting them. Roy thought it was best that he and I spent some quality time alone together.
He explained about his rivalry with Hudson in more detail. I’m still unclear if my seat on the plane was by accident, but Roy concluded that with Hudson it was more likely on purpose. Finally, he told me the truth. They are brothers. Roy was brought up by his father, wealthy and prestigious. Hudson had been brought up by his mother, denied the rich life that Roy had received.
It was a rivalry of siblings. Hudson’s mother had been manipulated from day one by Mr Sparks. She was his secretary and they had a brief affair. He had made sure that the truth was never revealed. Every time she tried to sue him or at least get support from him, he made sure that she lost her job or had to find a new place to live. He had an affair and knew that if his wife found out he would be divorced. He couldn’t afford that so he gave her a generous amount each month and ensured that she kept her distance. She did until Hudson was older and exposed the truth. Hudson had made a success of his business, but that wasn’t enough for him. He wanted Roy to pay for the mistakes that his father had made. I couldn’t understand why because it had nothing to do with Roy.
One thing for sure, I came to the conclusion that Hudson was a nasty piece of work. After Roy had confessed what was going on in his life – the truth – we returned to our room, as lovers, like we did before Hudson came into my life.
Chapter Nineteen
I unpack, then I book my sessions with Peter my trainer from Monday onwards and life from here on out feels pretty good. I call Grandma and ask her if I can visit tomorrow. Roy had made it clear he wanted to catch up on business for the next couple of days, so I thought it was a good idea to catch up with my family.
“What you doing?” he asks as he enters the room.
“Putting my things away from my short trip to Paris. Problem?” I ask as I flop on the bed. I wasn’t expecting him to drop down on top of me.
“You’re heavy,” I scream as I push him aside. He moves and then pulls me on top of him.
“What do you want, Roy Sparks?”
He kisses me gently and questions, “Where are we moving to?” Really, he wants us to move? He wants this as much as I do. I’m so relieved by his question, I give him so many kisses on his lips. He laughs and says, “Wherever you go I will follow.” He stares at me for a brief moment, then releases my wild hair and it flops all over my face. I laugh. “Why are you laughing?”
“I look wild when my hair is out and you constantly want it out.”
“You look free and beautiful.”
Damn, he knows the right things to say all the time. I kiss him passionately as he moves beside me.
He gets up and closes the door. He starts to strip me and then he takes off my dress and bra. I take off his clothes and toss them towards the arm chair. As we’re both naked in the bed, I wrap my arms around him and then we fall asleep. I sleep with the biggest smile on my face, I could get used to this. Actually, I am used to this.
Chapter Twenty
I am woken by a kiss on the lips and apologies of work. Roy always connects with Dubai on Sunday. He says
they work from Sunday to Thursday, but every other country works Monday to Friday, so it’s a good day to pick up with them.
I know the kiss means a jog on the treadmill, then he will be in the office pretty much the whole day. I get up and decide I won’t work out today. I’ll leave that for tomorrow when I start my sessions with Peter. Today I’m going to see grandma. It feels like a lifetime since I’ve seen her even though in reality it’s only been a couple of weeks. I pick up the phone and call her.
“Grandma!” I shout as I hear the loud music playing in the background.
“Deborah. You back already?”
Hmm, forgot I told her that I was going to Paris.
“Yep. Roy and work.” Gosh, I hate lying.
“So, you coming over?”
“Sure, going to get in the shower and then I’ll be on my way.”
“Can’t wait to see you.”
“What’s the—” before I can finish asking her about the music she’s hung up. Great! Probably means that the house is full. I was just about to call Henry when I thought of the craziest thing.
There’s no need. I’ll just take the bus. Shit, that was my life before I met Roy. I used to take the bus everywhere. I never had a driver and I don’t want to call Henry to take me out, especially on a Sunday. I feel good doing things I would do normally. I mean I’m not even working. I’ve never been accustomed to this lifestyle, it’s all new to me.
I grab my bag and run out the door with my knee length sky blue dress flowing in the air with my matching heels. Something about the colour blue that seems to set off my skin tone. I love this colour on me. As I was just about to close the front door I notice Carly, one of the new girls.
“Henry’s not outside.”
I reply, “I’m taking the bus. I don’t need Henry. It’s a beautiful day. Bye.”