by Remember Me
while they waited for her return.
“You could have left us a note, Margaret,” her mother replied. “I know how you’re
feeling. They call this the senior blues. It’s hard to accept that your whole world is going to
change.
“Many of your friends from school you might never see again, but that’s all right, you’ll
go to college and meet new friends. People don’t realize what a change it is to finish high school,
but you don’t need to worry, this will always be your home. Some things you can always come
back to.
“If things don’t go as well as you hope and you need some time to yourself to get on your
feet again, your father and I will always be here for you. We haven’t raised you all these years
just to get rid of you.”
“I know, mom,” Margaret answered, “and I’m sorry I didn’t leave you a note. I just
panicked and wanted to go someplace where I could clear my mind. I guess I fell asleep day
dreaming.”
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“Well come on into the kitchen, I’ll warm up your dinner for you,” her mother suggested.
“Why don’t you come join us, Ray. We won’t have a whole lot more of these family dinners left
to enjoy.”
Margaret walked into the kitchen, followed by her mother. She removed her sweater so
she wouldn’t sweat in the well heated home. Her parents had developed a sensitivity to cold as
they grew older and they kept the house unusually warm. Margaret often cracked her window,
even in the winters, to keep her room cooled off.
Her father sat in the living room finishing what he read. He assured his wife that he
would join them as soon as he had finished. Margaret sat down while her mother removed a plate
from the refrigerator and placed it in the microwave.
Margaret sat at the table, relieved that her parents had bought the story. She felt much
better than she had thought she would after their conversation. It amazed her that her fictitious
story could bring about such an honest and reassuring welcome at her home, and she almost felt
guilty for lying to them. Of course, she still didn’t know if they had lied to her.
Margaret had never worried about leaving home. She longed to break free and experience
the world on her own, but their talk reassured her that her parents cared deeply for her. This she
could not deny.
The sense of belonging to the family made Margaret again wonder about the project and
its validity. She had never known her mother to tell an all out lie to anyone’s face. She decided
she would test her mother in a face to face conversation.
“We saw a movie in Biology today on giving birth. It looked really gross,” uttered
Margaret from her seat at the table. The smell of her dinner coming from the oven reminded her
that she hadn’t eaten in many hours.
“Birth is a beautiful event, Margaret. It’s a lot different when you see it live,” spoke her
mother with sincerity.
“I don’t know, it looks really painful. I would be scared to death.”
“Is this conversation supposed to be leading somewhere, Margaret?” questioned her
mother with a look of fear on her face.
“Oh no, mother, don’t worry, I’m not pregnant. The movie just got me thinking about
things. Seeing a child separated from it’s mother and taking its first breath on its own is
incredible. It made me wonder what it would be like to leave home. You’ve never talked about
any of your births. I was just wondering if it was as painful as it looked?”
“Oh, there’s pain involved, dear,” assured her mother with a look of honesty. “The pain is
indescribable, but the reward makes it all worth it. In time, the pain goes away, but that child is
always there, and it’s a part of you, no matter what.”
“Was my delivery a very painful one?” Margaret asked, looking directly at her mother.
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“Well, as your father can tell you dear, the more children you have, the easier the
deliveries. There’s always a chance for some problem to arise which might complicate things,
but usually, the last child is the easiest delivery you have. Your time in labor generally decreases
with each pregnancy.”
“So then, my birth wasn’t as hard as Frank or Helen’s?” Margaret asked.
“I can honestly say that for me, you were the easiest birth of any of my children.”
“Did my labor last very long?”
“Your labor went so fast, I couldn’t even keep track of the time it took before you were in
my arms.”
Margaret smiled up at her mother as she walked over and set the plate down in front of
her. She realized her mother still couldn’t tell a lie, but she knew how to answer a question just
enough to please the person asking it.
Her mother sat down with a glass of milk across from her, and her father soon joined
them from the living room. The three chatted about the upcoming graduation and enjoyed the
rest of their evening together. As Margaret talked with them, she tried to imagine her mother
taking part in something of this nature. It was hard enough imagining her father as a radical
scientist, but her mother doing the same was incomprehensible. Her mother had always taught
her the difference between wrong and right. Margaret wished she could know if her mother had
taken part in the experiment from the beginning, and what her involvement was.
Alice sat in the living room reading a book when Ray finally entered the house early in
the morning. She looked at her watch, noticing the night had already passed. Alice had grown
used to Ray’s work taking him away from her at all hours of the night.
Alice had grown tired some time earlier, but forced herself to stay up throughout the
night. She could tell by her husband’s voice that something had upset him, and she wanted to see
him as soon as he arrived home. The sound of the front door opening disturbed the silence that
had surrounded her throughout the evening.
She set the book down next to her tea and waited for him to come down the hall. Ray
noticed her at the end of the hallway sitting on the couch in one of her soft, warm robes. He
could tell by the book in her hands and the reading lamp that she had stayed up through the night.
He regretted not letting her get some sleep during the night, but felt relieved that they could sit
down and talk now.
Ray walked into the living room carrying the small bundle in his arms. The light from the
small lamp didn’t allow Alice to see him clearly until he stood right above her. Her mouth fell
open as she saw the child in his arms.
“Is it Edward’s child?” she asked.
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“It’s kind of both Edward’s and mine,” Ray answered in a soft voice, a gentle smile came
over his face.
“I’m really confused here, Ray. Where did you get this child?”
“This child’s mother chose to abort her when she was only three months into the
pregnancy. Edward transplanted the fetus into an artificial uterus that he designed.”
“You’re kidding, right?”
“No, Alice,” Ray assured her.
He could smell the strong odor of the tea she drank and
wanted a glass for himself. The long night had taken its toll on his body. “When Edward first
presented me with the concept, I couldn’t believe it either, but I have all the documentation out
in my car.
“I didn’t really believe he could do it, but he’s been doing research on this for years.
When the professor he worked for died, he started building the device. He came to me asking if I
would help him in the research.”
“You helped him do this?” asked Alice, still staring in disbelief. She reached up and
cradled the child which Ray handed to her. She sat on the couch and cuddled it for several
seconds before she looked up at her husband. He seemed drawn back, and looked ashamed,
though she couldn’t understand why.
“I know it sounds odd, Alice. Edward and I were deeply against abortions in college.
When I went through medical school, I never thought I would have to perform one, but when I
got out here, I realized it was something I would have to do in order to get my practice going.
“I would do almost anything to find an alternative to performing abortions. This was a
radical answer to the problem, and nobody would ever buy into the idea.”
“Why have you kept it a secret from me all this time?”
“I didn’t want you knowing I performed abortions.”
“No, I don’t mean that,” explained Alice. “I’ve always known about the abortions. Ever
since the first one you performed. I’ve heard you crying in the den late at night.
“I’m your wife, Ray. You can’t hide things like that from me. It’s written all over your
face. What I meant was, why didn’t you tell me about what you and Edward were doing?”
“Do you realize what this could do to my career right now, Alice?”
“No, Ray, what could it do?”
“This isn’t the way that this kind of research is to be performed. All the research has to
go through all sorts of reviews by scientists from across the world before such a procedure is
attempted. It has to first be tried and proven effective on animals. Edward didn’t want to do
that.”
“Why not, Ray?” asked Alice. “You know how they would have reacted, why couldn’t
you talk him into going through the right channels?”
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“Because I have to live with myself every time I perform an abortion, abortions on
children just like the one you’re cradling in you arms. Look at that child and imagine trying to
live with that. I know what we did sounds crazy, but somehow, the idea of this really appealed to
me. I wanted it to happen really bad.”
Alice smiled back at her husband. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at the child in her
arms. “She really is an adorable child, Ray. I’m sorry I’ve never been here for you to talk to
about the abortions. I didn’t think you would want to talk about it, but I should have supported
you better. I know it must put a lot of stress on you.”
“I’m lost now, Alice,” Ray uttered in a hopeless voice. “I have absolutely no idea what to
do. I studied Edward’s books long enough to figure out how to remove the child from the
artificial uterus, but most of it is way over my head. I snuck the child out of the house while
everyone was sleeping. Now I’m not sure what I should do.”
“What will Edward’s wife say when she finds the child missing?” “She doesn’t even
know about the baby,” Ray explained. “Edward knew what he was doing was wrong and he
didn’t want his family wrapped up in it all. She has absolutely no idea what he was doing.”
“So what did Edward plan to do when the child was taken out of the artificial uterus?”
questioned Alice. “Surely you two had a plan.”
“Sure we did, Alice. We were going to come out publicly with it, once we had shown that
the procedure could be done without harm to the mother of the child, but that was when Edward
was still around.
“He designed the device and could defend everything to the scientific community. I was
just there to supply the child. I hadn’t even heard from him in over a month now. I was just
supposed to be there to back up his claims and his scientific reputation when everyone freaked
out. Do you realize what this could do?”
“So why don’t you go forward with it now?” asked Alice.
“I just told you why, Alice. I don’t know the first thing about Edward’s research. He has
volumes of books in his laboratory. He’s worked for ten years coming up with everything for the
device. People would think I was a fraud and a kidnapper.
“I would get torn apart if I came forward with this now. I can’t do that at this point in
time. It will take me years to figure out the concepts of his device to defend it to the public.”
“What does the baby’s mother think about all this?”
Ray remained silent to his wife’s question. He sat staring at the child held in his wife’s
arms. The child had her eyes open, looking back at the woman. Alice waited for an answer.
“Tell me you didn’t, Ray,” uttered Alice after some time.
“She chose to abort her child. Once the child is removed from her body, it becomes my
property and mine to choose what to do with.”
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“How did you do all this without her knowing about it?”
“Edward and I sedated her. He had the procedure down to a matter of minutes. As far as
she knows, the child was destroyed during the procedure.”
“So let’s see if I have this straight now, Ray,” replied Alice in a bewildered tone. “You
and Edward sedated a young girl who had chosen to have an abortion, and surgically removed
the child without her knowing about it. Edward then took the child to his home and hooked it up
to an artificial uterus he designed without ever telling his wife about it. Edward is dead and you
have a perfectly healthy child which I am holding right now, that has come out of all this,
correct?”
“Exactly.”
Alice glanced back at her husband with a smile. “She’s a darling child, Ray. I think I’ll
keep her.”
“What are you talking about?”
“I want to keep her, Ray. It’s the only way. We can’t just give her away to somebody.
This child was never legally born.”
“I made a promise to Edward’s widow,” explained Ray. “I told her I would finish up Ed’s
research for him. The work is done. It might take me years to understand it well enough that I
can publish his findings to the scientific community. I promised her I would do that. What kind
of impact would it have on this child to raise her if she knows about all this?”
“Who said we have to tell her?” asked his wife. “Up until right now, her entire life has
been a lie. One more won’t hurt her. Look at our family, Ray. Frank is only three years old. If he
woke up tomorrow with a new little sister, he would never question it.
“All we have to do is convince our friends and neighbors that we adopted her and don’t
want any of our other children to know about it. My family won’t be upset if I told them we
found a child that needed adopting and decided to go ahead and adopt. I know
your family would
love the idea. You’re a doctor, Ray. You can fake a birth certificate. I want to keep this child,
Ray.”
“You realize what you’re saying, Alice. You’ll have three really young children to deal
with in the house. Are you willing to accept that kind of responsibility?”
“I know we can handle it financially, and I’m willing to accept her as one of my own
children if you are. Besides, Ray, it isn’t like you have any choice. What are you going to do,
leave her on somebody’s doorstep? “When the time is right and she’s old enough to
understand what we’ve done here tonight, we’ll tell her. Until then, you can study Edward’s
work and begin preparing it for publication. You can keep your promise and we’ll offer her a
stable home where she can grow up with our family.”
“So what do we do now then?” asked Ray.
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“Has she been fed yet?”
“Edward had some glucose solution made up for her that I fed her right after I removed
her from the device. She slept all the way home in the car, so she hasn’t ate in over two hours.”
“Can I nurse her, Ray?”
“Sure dear. It would probably help her considerably to get some of the immunities that
you’ve built up through your milk. Will you have enough milk for Helen though?”
“I’ve been cutting Helen back substantially. She can survive on a bottle now. Once my
body realizes I’m feeding more, it will produce more milk. I should have plenty for this little
one.”
“You’re a remarkable woman, Alice. I knew you would have all the answers. You always
seem to solve the little problems I get myself wrapped up into.”
“This is hardly a problem and far from a mistake,” defended Alice. “I believe God has
had a pretty big hand in all of this. This device that Edward designed could save thousands of
lives for families such as ours, that want children.
“I will never understand how anyone can look at a child as beautiful as this, and call it a
mistake. She’s a little angel, Ray. Start bringing the rest of the stuff in from the car. I’ll go set
something up for her to sleep in tonight.”
“I’ll have to go back up to Edward’s house next week and get the rest of the stuff from