by John Snyder
“Hello, I’m Pastor Bob Parsley from the Salvation Army Mission.”
“Hello, Pastor, my husband speaks very highly of you. Come on in.”
“I’m here about your father.”
Emma frowned, feeling a bit uncomfortable. Perhaps even a little guilty. She cocked her head at an angle and her lips tightened, wondering at the purpose for the pastor’s visit. A worried look abruptly appeared on her face.
“Is he ill or something?”
“No, but he’s heartbroken. He’s staying at the Salvation Army Mission and he has been searching for you for a long time to ask for your forgiveness.”
“Do you know what he has done to me and my family?”
“Yes, he told me all about it. He’s a changed man, Emma, and he would like you to give him the opportunity to make things up to you. He wants a relationship with you and his granddaughter, Mary.”
“Well, that’s impossible. Not after all he’s done.”
“Forgiveness is never impossible.”
“I’m afraid it is in this case.”
“Emma, your father has come a long way to speak with you and he desperately wants to resume his relationship with Mary. He’s totally transformed into a new man, not the one you remember, and one exceptionally worthy of your forgiveness. His struggles with alcohol are behind him. You have no idea of the hell he’s been through and what he has been able to overcome. Because of him, our bell ringing campaign this year is more successful than ever. What he has been able to do has made a real difference to the needy people of this city.”
“Pastor Parsley, I appreciate what you are trying to do, but I just can’t subject myself or my daughter to more of the hurt he has inflicted upon us.”
“Mary seems to want a relationship with him.”
“Yes, but Mary doesn’t understand his past.”
“Sometimes we should look at situations through the innocent eyes of children. If we do, we come away with a whole new perspective.”
“Well, I’m sorry. I don’t want to see my father, and I certainly don’t want him around Mary.”
“Do you believe in forgiveness?”
“Of course.”
“Well, then…”
“I can forgive, but I can’t forget.”
“That’s all he wants from you…forgiveness. He understands the difficulty you will encounter forgetting many of the things he has done. Will you please give him another chance?”
Emma carefully considered what Pastor Bob said to her. Then, defiantly, she spoke. “I really don’t want to discuss this any further. Is there anything else?”
“No, that is the reason for my visit.”
“Well, good day.”
“Please, won’t you reconsider?”
“No!”
When Bob returned to the mission, he found Jacob lying on his cot, his feet propped up, reading the newspaper. From the pastor’s expression, he could discern that Bob’s visit with Emma hadn’t gone well. Jacob sat upright, swinging his feet over the side of the cot. Bob sat down next to him.
“I paid Emma a visit this evening.”
“And?”
“She refuses to see you, or to let Mary see you.”
“I was afraid that would be the case. What am I going to do?”
“Wait, Jacob. Just wait. Have faith and things will work out.”
“I’m beginning to lose faith. I’ve tried so hard to make things right. I have changed the way I live my life. I have gone out of my way to help others. What else can I do?”
“I know you have, Jacob.”
“Emma refuses to talk to me and now I have lost Mary…the little girl who brought so much happiness into my life.”
“Don’t give up on it just yet. I know Emma’s giving deep thought to what I said. Give her some time to come around. I have faith that she will. In her heart, she knows it’s the right thing to do.”
Jacob’s eyes focused on his feet as they shuffled back and forth on the wooden floor while he solemnly listened to the details of Bob’s visit with Emma. Bob felt regret for having to deliver the news to Jacob. He could see the disappointment in his expression as Jacob dismally gazed at the floor. Unable to think of anything uplifting to say, he pondered for a moment. Then…
“I’ve got another trick up my sleeve.”
Encouraged, Jacob looked over at him.
“What are you going to do?”
“As it turns out, she is married to Dr. Brown, the doctor at the hospital who stitched up your head. I think I’ll go have a talk with him.”
“I thought I recognized him at Emma’s house, but I wasn’t sure. I knew I had seen him before.”
“I’ll pay him a visit tomorrow and see if he can help us.”
* * *
The next morning Bob went to the hospital. He waited about two hours until Dr. Nathaniel Brown could see him.
“Pastor Bob? What a pleasant surprise.”
“Do you have a few minutes? There’s something important I need to speak with you about.”
“Yes, I have some time.”
“I’m here to talk about Jacob.”
“Wow. What a messy situation.”
“It sure is.”
“What can I do?”
“Jacob has been on a long and bumpy journey to find his children and reconcile with them. I know that in the past, he has done some hurtful things to his family. But he’s a changed man. He desperately wants to speak with Emma about her forgiving him. He wants a relationship with her and Mary.”
“I read the wonderful article about him in the newspaper. Sounds like he’s doing a lot of magnificent things. But that’s a very touchy subject with Emma.”
“I realize that. If only she would give him a chance. He deserves that, at the very least. He’s worked very hard at changing his life. He even had me baptize him! Jacob has made a huge difference at the Salvation Army, and in the city of Baltimore for that matter.”
“I remember meeting him for the first time when he came in here and I stitched up his head. He seemed like a colorfully nice fellow. A bit lost, nonetheless.”
“Jacob is a special person. He just needs another chance. That is all he wants. I’m afraid he may go back to his old ways if he doesn’t get it. That would be a terrible loss.”
Nathaniel thought for a second, running his hand through his thick black hair. “I understand.” Hesitating, he pressed his lips together. “I’ll talk with Emma about this tonight, but I can’t promise anything. You know how angry she is about all of this.”
“Just do what you can. We’ll meet tomorrow at about this time if that’s convenient for you?”
“That will be fine.”
* * *
Emma was in the kitchen when Nathaniel got home. He entered the back door, hiding his hand behind his back to conceal the delicate bouquet of flowers he’d purchased along the way. As Emma greeted him, he revealed the gift.
“Oh, Nathaniel, they’re beautiful. Thank you so much.” She rose on her tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. “You know I love flowers.”
“Where’s Mary?”
“She’s up in her room, brooding.”
“She’s hurt, Emma. She doesn’t understand all of this.”
“She will someday.”
“No. Don’t rob her of the memory of her grandfather.”
“She has no memory of him.”
“They struck up a close relationship when she was helping him raise money for the Salvation Army.”
“She didn’t even know he was her grandfather at that time.”
“Yes, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that they love each other. He loves her, as he does you. And now she knows that the kind old gentleman she came to love is actually her grandfather.”
“What does she know? She only spent a short time with him.”
“But it was a very special time for her.”
“What’s your point, Nathaniel?”
“I received a visit from Bob
Parsley this afternoon.”
“I can only guess as to the subject of that conversation,” Emma said sarcastically.
“He said your father has changed. He’s been baptized and is doing good deeds in service to mankind. I’d like to talk with you about giving your father a chance at forgiveness.”
“Oh, that’s what the flowers were all about!” Emma said dismissively as she tossed them on the counter.
“No. The flowers are about how much I love you.”
“Nathaniel, I cannot forgive my father for what he has done. I just can’t. I have told you this many times before.”
“I realize it will be hard for you. This is an opportunity for you to release the anger you have been harboring for all these years. That can only be good for you. Put it to rest. Leave it behind, and start anew. If not for yourself…then do it for Mary.”
Emma began to cry. “You don’t understand. He never did anything to you. He never broke your heart.”
“I’m able to look at this more objectively. I have a fresher perspective than you.”
“Your perspective has been spared the heartache and disappointment I have experienced at the hands of my father. So your perspective is through rose-colored glasses.”
“Come on, Emma. Please be reasonable.”
Nathaniel and Emma began to argue. Mary listened as their voices drifted up the stairs and into her room. She cracked the door to better hear what they were saying. Mary couldn’t understand her mother’s reluctance to embrace her grandfather. It went against all that Mary had been taught by her parents. As she listened, she began to cry. She tried to contain herself, so as not to alert her parents that she was aware of their arguing. After composing herself, she sneaked down the stairs for a closer look at what was happening in the kitchen, reaching the bottom just as her parents’ disagreement ended.
Mary witnessed her mother and father embracing. Her mother was crying as her father tried to soothe her. “I love you, Emma.”
“You can’t comprehend how I feel toward my father.” Emma’s weeping became more intense.
“Yes, I can. I understand how you feel, and why you feel that way. His actions have impacted your life in many negative ways. I can’t say that I blame you for feeling the way you do.”
“Then why do you want me to give him another chance to break my heart?”
“Because I believe in forgiveness.”
“I believe in forgiveness, too. But my father is beyond it.”
“Oh, and who appointed you the one who determines who is forgiven and who’s not?”
“You know what I mean.”
“No. I don’t know what you mean. You owe it to your father to show him some compassion and forgiveness. He’s paid the price.”
“And what do you know about the price he’s paid? He hasn’t paid me anything. In fact, he owes me! He owes me the life of my mother, my lost childhood, and much more than you will ever understand.”
Nathaniel grasped Emma by the arms and looked down at her compassionately. “I didn’t mean it that way. What I mean is…he’s come here to give back much of what he has taken from you. Just give him a chance.”
Mary walked into the kitchen, her eyes red from crying, dried tears staining her face.
“Mommy, please…please forgive my grandpa.”
“Mary, go back up to your room. Your father and I are talking.”
Mary glared at her mother, before turning and running up the stairs.
“No, Mary…wait!” her father called out to her.
Mary stopped, turning to face her mother and father, then timidly reentered the kitchen.
“Nathaniel! What are you doing? I told her to go to her room so we could discuss this.”
“This has as much to do with her as it does us. We need to listen to how Mary feels.”
Befuddled and not knowing what to do, she stood there quietly. There was a conspicuous silence in the room as they all looked at each other, wondering who would speak first. Nathaniel took the initiative. “Mary? How do you feel about what is happening?”
“I don’t like to see you and Mommy arguing. I don’t understand why Mommy doesn’t love her father. He’s a nice man. He’s my best friend, my grandpa…and I love him. I want him to come and live with us.”
“That’s impossible, child!”
“Now, Emma, give her a chance to say her piece.”
“When I met him, he was Mr. Jingles. We became best friends. He was so nice to me, and he taught me about giving, and how good it makes you feel. Then, the most wonderful thing happened…” Mary began to cry.
“What is it, love?” her father asked.
“I learned that Mr. Jingles is my grandpa, too. That made me happy. But Mommy doesn’t love Grandpa. She hates him, and I don’t know why. She told me he was dead and I believed her for all this time. I love Grandpa and I want to be with him. Please, Mommy, let me see Grandpa. I want to spend Christmas with him.”
“Sweetie, you are too young to understand this difficult situation,” Emma interjected.
“All I know is that I love Grandpa and I want to spend time with him.”
“But, Mary, you don’t know what he—”
Nathaniel interrupted, “Why don’t you go up to your room for a while so Mommy and Daddy can talk more about this. Will you, my dear?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
Mary retreated to her room, but left the door slightly ajar, making it easier to eavesdrop on the conversation. She positioned herself in front of the door.
“Do you see how this has affected Mary?”
“Yes, but I still can’t bring myself to forgive that man. And I certainly don’t want Mary around him.”
“If that’s truly how you feel, though I think you are terribly wrong, I’ll respect your wishes…but I want you to know that I strongly disagree. I will not be the one to tell Mary. That’ll be your job.”
* * *
It was two days before Christmas and snow was falling. Jacob stood on the street corner lethargically ringing his bell. His heart just wasn’t in it. The Christmas he’d hoped for with his family was not in the cards. It dampened his spirits and he felt Christmas, from now on, would just be another day to him.
Back at the Brown household, Emma busily prepared for the Christmas Eve feast she planned for the family.
Mary, who had sequestered herself in her room since the events surrounding her grandfather, decided she would ask her mother one more time to change her mind about seeing Jacob.
“Mommy, can I go to the street corner and see Grandpa?”
“No, you may not.”
“But why? Why won’t you let me see him?”
“We’ve been through this, Mary. Now, I don’t want to talk about it anymore!”
“You’re mean!” Mary said as she ran back up the stairs, crying.
Meanwhile, Jacob’s bell rang, almost muted against the bustle on the street as people rushed to do their last-minute shopping before the holiday. Jacob’s thoughts were preoccupied with images of Mary and Emma and his deep yearning to be with them. The opportunity to spend this special Christmas with those he loved seemed to slip through his fingers. With regularity, he glanced down the street, praying that Mary would come running up with her tin can to help him.
“Jacob? You don’t seem like your jolly old self today. What’s wrong?” one of his frequent givers asked.
“Just not feeling up to par.”
“Sorry to hear that. I hope you’re feeling better by Christmas,” the man said as he dropped some coins into Jacob’s kettle.
“Thank you, Pat.”
“Merry Christmas.”
“Same to you,” Jacob replied in an uncharacteristic, almost inaudible tone.
The gentle snowfall, which greeted the early morning, fell heavily now, quickly accumulating on the streets, sidewalks, and rooftops. The once-crowded streets were almost abandoned, except for a few stragglers still intent on picking up a last-minute Christmas gift befor
e retiring to the warmth and coziness of the indoors. Jacob stubbornly remained, ringing his bell, trying to squeeze the last bit of generosity from those still brave enough to weather the elements.
Still refusing to believe that Mary would no longer be a part of his life, he kept looking up the street where she’d first appeared, hoping against hope that he would see her standing there. The reality of the situation nagged at him, telling him what he already knew…that he was only fooling himself. Shaking the snow from his coat and hat, he packed up and began his trek back to the mission.
As he walked through the snowstorm, he heard the faint calling of an angel’s voice.
“Grandpa, Grandpa, wait up.”
He turned, at first thinking he was hallucinating, dropping his kettle. Mary ran up the sidewalk, catching him in a fervent embrace. He swung her around, a colossal grin on his face. They clung to each other, Mary burying her head in his stomach as they both began to cry.
“I don’t understand, Mary. I thought your mother said you could never see me again.”
“I ran away to be with you.”
“Oh, Mary, you can’t do this. Your mom and dad will be in a panic. And your mom will blame me. I have to take you back home.”
“No, Grandpa, I won’t go.”
“But it’s the right thing to do.”
“Please, let me stay with you.”
“You can’t. I’ll get into all kinds of trouble.”
“I’m not going back home.”
“But you have to.”
“No, I don’t!” Mary took off, running down the street.
Jacob pursued her, calling her name and demanding that she come back, but she escaped him. She rounded the corner and he lost sight of her.
* * *
Mary’s mother discovered the note left behind in Mary’s room, stating her intentions to spend Christmas with her grandpa. The last Emma saw of Mary was hours earlier. She assumed she was in her room, brooding. Furious, yet worried, she called Nathaniel at the hospital.
“Nathaniel, Mary’s missing.”
“What?”