by Unknown
She stopped at the bar behind us and grabbed a carafe of water, which she placed on our table. Her sleek ponytail swung across one shoulder when she bent to pat Drake on the shoulder. "It’s been a long time since we’ve seen you here, Drake."
The way she was standing over him gave him ample view of her cleavage, and with her back to me I couldn’t see if he was, as I would expect, staring at her boobs. "It’s good to see you too, Louisa."
She gave me a sideways glance before dismissing me and giving him her undivided attention. Nails digging into the skin of my palms, I clasped them together under the table when she propped her hand on her hip, tilting toward him. "You haven’t been in here since…"
Since what? I stared at her back, willing her to finish her sentence. Instead, she flipped open the notepad. My mind raced. Had he been involved with her? I wouldn’t blame him if he had. She was beautiful. Still, I felt uncomfortable that he would bring me here, where she worked. Was he showing me off to her? There was something unresolved in the way they talked to each other, and I tapped my fingers against my leg, my lips pressed together.
"... Do you want your usual?" she asked, "I mean what used to be your usual."
"Yes. Two of the linguine and a beer, thanks."
She jotted it down on her notepad. "How are you doing anyway? We’ve missed you around here."
Who was we? Or, did she mean she’d missed him? My foot joined in the tapping, and I forced it to be still. He was so caught up in their conversation, I didn’t get to order, not that I minded linguine. I was thinking of getting it anyway, but still, I wasn’t impressed that he seemed to have forgotten I existed.
"Believe it or not, I’ve missed you too. I need to get back more often."
"Let me know next time you’re back, and I’ll make sure I have the night off." She shoved her notepad back in her pocket and poured water into our glasses. My jaw clenched and I stiffened. I would not lose my cool because some gorgeous woman from his past flirted with him. I wasn’t going to be that girl. Besides, I had nothing to be jealous about, did I? He wanted me now, but was it going to last? Finally she walked away, and I ran a finger through the condensation on my glass as I contemplated the answers.
"You’ll like the linguine." He leaned back in his chair.
"Uh-huh." I wiped my fingers on a napkin and sipped my water. His gaze was on me now, and the soft, almost whimsical expression he’d been wearing had been replaced by a harder, sharper one. Had he loved her? Had she broken his heart?
He leaned forward and grabbed my hand, running his thumb over the back of my wrist. "What’s wrong?"
"N-nothing." Hoping not to betray my inner thoughts, I put my other hand in his. "I just realized I don’t know anything about you."
"Sure you do. You know I’m a doctor, that I’m fascinated by you, and that after we’re finished here I’m going to take you home and show you how much I want you."
His other hand grasped my knee, and I jumped. He ran his knuckle up the inside of my leg, and I struggled to keep focused. "You used to come here often?"
"I grew up here."
"Why did you leave?"
His hand on my thigh stilled, then he pulled away from me. Leaning back in his chair, he ran his finger over the almost invisible scar I’d noted earlier. "Do you remember when I told you about the woman who died?"
I nodded, tugging my lip between my teeth.
"She was my fiancée. We were getting married." He shut his eyes and seemed to fold in on himself. "I couldn’t stay. Too many memories."
"Oh." I reached over the table and squeezed his hand. "I’m so sorry."
He pulled himself up, gripping my hand. "It was a long time ago. The pain fades."
"It does." I could remember when I’d hurt so bad I didn’t know if I’d make it through. It seemed like a distant memory now.
He cupped my palm with his hand. "What’s past is past. This is my future."
Louisa brought our food to the table, and I didn’t get a chance to ask what he meant by that statement. She gripped his shoulder for a second as she ran her gaze over me and the corner of her mouth curved. I wanted to smack her hand off his shoulder, but then she was moving on to other tables, and I breathed a little easier. Picking up my fork, I twirled it through the strands of pasta. The first bite was heaven, leaving me hooked. I might not like the woman who served us, but their chef was brilliant.
I waited for him to start a conversation, but he said nothing as we ate, and I searched for topics that weren’t so close to the painful subject we’d touched on earlier. "Were you always a doctor?"
He put his fork down and gazed at me with dancing eyes. "Why do you ask?"
"Well, you have a lot of tattoos." Blushing, I dipped my head to gaze at my water glass, almost empty now, and ran my finger around the rim.
He chuckled. "I get asked that a lot. I was a crazy teenager, I guess. I had most of these before I was eighteen. One of my friends was an artist, and he needed a body to practice on. I volunteered mine. When I decided to be a doctor I was worried about how I’d be seen, but it’s amazing what a white coat can hide."
I grinned. "I’m pretty sure you shocked the hell out of my brother."
He picked up his fork and twirled the linguine around it. "Yeah, I think I did too."
"So you were a rebellious teen?" I smirked. "Somehow, I don’t think you’ve changed much."
"More than you would think," he said in a low voice. He took my hand in his and ran a circle over my palm with his finger. "How about you? Were you always as controlled as you are now?"
I dropped my fork in my bowl and pushed it away. "Yes and no."
"Tell me about it."
He wasn’t asking so much about how I'd been as a teenager, but the events that had led to me being who I was now. "My father died. I wasn’t coping, and I started drinking. I got into some trouble and realized that I had no one but myself to protect me, so I grew up real fast."
"You had Orion." He pushed his empty plate aside. "He seemed quite protective when he found out about me."
"You’re right, but he had his own issues to deal with, and he didn’t know. I didn’t tell anyone for a long time."
He got up and came around the table to pull me into his arms. "You’ve got me now. Want to get out of here?"
I nodded.
"I’ll pay the bill."
I waited for him while he went up to Louisa and handed her his card. They talked as she processed the bill, and I wondered if I would ever find out the story between them without asking for it. She handed him his card, and he came back to me. Schooling my features, I fought the urge to stick my tongue out at her.
"Let’s go, darlin’. I can’t wait to get you underneath me."
I glanced at the woman as he led me up the stairs. Staring at him, her hand over her chest it was easy to see she was still hung up on him. Would that be me when this thing between us was over?
I shoved the thought to the back of my mind. My body aching for his touch was enough.
Chapter Thirteen
Drake
By the way she clung to me, I could tell that Louisa had intimidated Birdie. Even when we'd been young Louisa had been intimidating and a little rambunctious. Wrapping my arm around Birdie, I pulled her closer. She didn’t relax into me, her spine stiff as she kept that inch of distance between us. I tightened my hand on her shoulder and closed the gap as we walked toward the bike.
She glanced up at me, her lips parted, but she didn’t ask the questions I expected her to. I cleared my throat. If this thing between us was going to continue she needed to know, and yet, I couldn’t get the words past the lump in my throat. When I handed her a helmet she reached up to touch my cheek. "Drake?"
I lowered my head to hers and caught her questions with my mouth. There would be time later to see if my little bird could hold her own against my past, but for now, I’d settle for a night between her legs. Helmets on, I pulled her onto the bike behind me. The roar of the engi
ne blocked out any chance of conversation, and I held her hands wrapped around me as we headed back toward Reverence.
I hadn’t expected to see Louisa. I hadn’t seen her since… the funeral. Hadn't even said goodbye when I left Carlton. It had been too difficult. I’d stood in my momma’s kitchen, my suitcases at my feet and my phone in my hand, my thumb hovering over the number. All I had to do was press the call button and tell her family I was leaving. Easy, theoretically, but it was anything but. What was I supposed to say to them? They’d lost a daughter, a sister, and now I was walking away from them too.
I hadn’t been able to look Louisa in the eyes any more. It had been too damn painful. She looked so much like Hailey. Reminders of what I lost crowded in on me.
***
I tugged at the front of my T-shirt until the collar tore. I couldn’t breathe here anymore.
"You’re leaving?" Leo shuffled into the kitchen.
"Yeah." I shoved my phone back in my pocket.
Head down, he opened the fridge and pulled out another beer. It wasn’t even lunchtime and I’d already lost count of how many he’d had, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. I’d held Hailey’s broken body against my own, while he sat on the road beside me. He was supposed to have gone and picked up the present for Hailey’s parents. Instead she’d gone, despite being relegated to bed rest.
I stared at the car on the other side of the road. A plastic death trap, not built to survive like my truck. The front of it was mangled. The bumper dangled to the ground and the hood was bent up in the middle. Its windscreen had probably shattered on impact. My gaze wandered to the thick black tire marks that ran several feet along the road before curving wildly.
If she’d taken the truck she’d still be here, but it was no good when it was still parked in the drive behind me. I’d asked Leo to go, but he’d been too caught up in his damn photography to do the one thing that would have kept her safe. She would still be here with me. My family wouldn’t have been torn into the tattered memories I desperately clutched at. He blamed himself, and the logical part, the un-fractured part of my brain recognized that it wasn’t his fault, but that part of me was fading with each breath I took without her. I cleared my throat, and he straightened but didn’t turn around.
"I need you to look out for Louisa."
He nodded and stalked from the room.
I stayed long enough to give my mother one last hug. Arms wrapped around me, she’d cried. My mother had always been such a strong woman, but now, she seemed so small. Stepping back, she wiped at her eyes before she cupped my cheek. "Come home when you’re ready."
I nodded and bent to pick up my cases. We both knew it would be a long time before I could step foot back in Carlton. "Bye, Mom."
She walked me out onto the porch and waited while I threw my cases into the bed. I climbed into the cab of my beat up truck and watched her wave goodbye in the rearview mirror as I drove away.
***
I half-waved at the doorman as I tugged at Birdie’s hand and pulled her toward the elevator. Louisa had always talked of getting out and seeing the world, so running into her tonight had surprised me. Going back to Carlton had been a mistake. Seeing her, even more so. She was the past, Birdie my future, and I wasn’t sure which was worse: Introducing my future to the past, or flaunting the future in my past’s face.
Birdie
He hadn’t said two words since we left the restaurant. He’d kissed me to shut me up, and I was pretty sure he’d do the same if I tried to ask him about her again. The elevator doors slid shut when he pressed the button that would take us to his floor. It didn’t surprise me that he would live in a building with an elevator and a doorman. Okay, for a minute, I'd been surprised, but that quickly wore off as he offered a friendly hello and stalked through to the elevator. I wondered what floor he lived on until he punched the button for the 14th floor. There were only 15 floors. Yes, he was a doctor, but I hadn’t put two and two together. I was so used to seeing him in tattered jeans and old worn out T-shirts. The man was an enigma, and I stared at him trying to work out why that was.
I studied his face, the tight line of his lips and his hunched shoulders, until he glanced at me. As he pulled me against him, it was as if he let go of whatever ghosts had held him on the ride home. The corners of his mouth curled up into an easygoing grin that sent butterfly flutters through my belly.
He knotted his fingers in my hair. "I guess you’re putting two and two together and coming up with five, right about now."
I nodded.
He pressed me back against the wall, his other hand coming up to stroke along my jaw. "The only thing you need to remember is I am not my money."
"No, you aren’t." I breathed him in as he tugged at my bottom lip with his teeth.
Grazing my body with his hand, he brought it down between my thighs. "I can’t wait to be inside of you. I was so close to taking what was mine at dinner, but you changed the damn subject." He reached beside him to slam the stop button on the elevator.
"Sorry." I pulled his mouth down on mine, his kiss hard and unrelenting, as he possessed me, his hand sliding up to feel my already soaked panties.
I chuckled into his mouth.
"What?" he growled, stroking me.
My knees dipped, and I held onto him tighter. "If someone had told me I’d be getting felt up in an elevator I wouldn’t have believed it. You’re a bad influence, Dr. Barclay."
"Damn right, I am, darlin’." He pushed my panties to the side and slid two digits into me, stroking his thumb over my clit. "I’m exactly the type of influence you need."
There was no denying it. "Fuck me, Barclay." I yanked at the front of his pants and the button gave way, the zip undoing, and I took him in my hand, stroking him.
He pressed against me, his fingers digging into my hips and my ass. "I don’t have a condom."
"It doesn’t matter."
He reared back to stare at me, his lips curled. "But…"
"I’m not crazy. I’m on birth control."
"Fuck." He grabbed my ass and hauled me up, my back pressed against the wall, my legs wrapped around his hips as he thrust into me. There was no gentleness in the way he took me, lifting me up and down his length as he assaulted my mouth. My insides were on fire from the way his cock stroked my walls and the friction of his hips pounding shot through my clit. I could hear how wet I was, feel it as it coated his cock.
"Fuck, I’m… going to cum," I moaned into his mouth. "I’m—cumming." My voice went up several octaves as I spasmed around him, my toes curling as he came too, sagging against me, propped up by the elevator wall.
We made quick work of adjusting ourselves before he hit the elevator button, and we were again rising toward his apartment. Glancing up at him, the sly grin on his face mirrored my own. I wondered if anyone had tried to use the elevator while we were preoccupied and if there would be people waiting when the doors opened. Hands pressed to my heated cheeks, I hoped there wouldn’t be.
The elevator bumped and the doors slid open. Drake strode into the hallway. but I hesitated as I peeked around the doors before joining him. He sniggered. "Embarrased?"
"Only if people knew." I followed him.
He stopped at the first door to the left and dug his keys from his pocket. "I’m not embarrassed that I can’t keep my hands off you. I want people to look at you, and know that I’m fucking you, that you’re mine."
"Then why didn’t you make it obvious to the woman in Carlton? She had her hands all over you."
He stalked into the apartment, and I followed him, fidgeting with my bag. I hadn’t meant to bring her up.
His apartment was not so much an apartment as a mansion. The living area sprawled out before me, a kitchen to my left, and on the right several doors opened into bedrooms. Dark leather couches and a matching armchair took up the majority of the floor. A white screen filling the wall in front of them. I moved further into the room. There were three bedrooms, each with a king size b
ed, all immaculate. He probably had a cleaning service come in and take care of things.
He grabbed a beer from the fridge. "Do you want anything?"
I wanted the answer to my question. "Water. Thanks."
He poured a glass and handed it to me. I chewed the inside of my cheek. "You haven’t answered my question."
"It’s different."
"How is it different?"
He ran his hand through his hair, his head cocked, but he didn’t answer. Instead, he slunk toward me, and I stepped back, stumbling into the couch.
"Why don’t you tell me what you mean, when you say there was an incident?"
My heart thumped. "I can’t."
"Why is that?" He trapped me against the leather. "What’s keeping you from telling me everything about yourself?"
I swallowed. The room was spinning as he stared into my eyes, making it very hard not to tell him my secrets. "I’ve never told anyone. It’s too painful."
He crushed me to him, stroking my hair as I tried to level out my jagged breathing. "You’ll tell me your secrets when you’re ready. Give me the same opportunity."
"Okay." I clutched at his chest. He had loved her. That much I was sure of, and my heart ached to be that close to him.
"Now." He picked me up in his arms. "I want to lay you out on my bed and take photos, so I can look at you any time I want."
I smacked his shoulder. "That is never going to happen."
"No?" He grinned. "I bet you I can change your mind."
He tossed me down onto the black silk sheets, his smell surrounding me as he straddled me and pinned my hands beside my head. I giggled. "Never going to happen."
Knotting his fingers through mine, he bent down to kiss me. His lips moved on mine, and I opened to him, letting him command me. "You’re mine now, darlin’. If I want a picture of you for my screensaver you’re going to comply."
I tossed my head back and forth, and he let go of my hands to pull his phone from his pocket, snapping several photos before I managed to get my hands over my face. He wanted to see my face when he picked up his phone, and that meant something. Giggling, I peeked at him between two fingers, and he snapped another photo. "Are you done?"