Uncivilized

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Uncivilized Page 16

by Laura Stapleton


  He took her hand again and led her back to their camp. “No more apologies, then. We can sleep tonight under my blanket, and I promise you’ll wake up fully dressed tomorrow morning.”

  Ellen hesitated next to the open bedroll for only a second. “I’ve no doubts about being safe with you.” She settled in, waiting as he cuddled up next to her then made sure his wool blanket covered them both. Tingly from the kiss but too tired to think about it, she fell asleep as soon as her eyes closed.

  He kept her warm through the night, his body seeming to radiate heat in their bedroll. The next morning, she woke before him. Del hadn’t bothered with a fire, and now Ellen wished he had. Coffee sounded like heaven, even a few beans to chew appealed to her. She lay still, wondering if she should wake him.

  “Good morning,” he said in her ear. “We are almost to your family.”

  “How far do you think they are?”

  “Guessing by their prior rate, I would say about fifteen to twenty miles from us.” He nuzzled her neck. “If not so far, I would have you this morning.”

  “Have me what? I could fix breakfast.”

  He turned her to face him. “I would have you this way.”

  “Oh my!” She looked down as he kissed from her forehead to her lips. “You promised I’d be safe with you. Though I might like taking the time for more kisses, my brothers….”

  Glancing up into her eyes, he gave her a sad smile. “I agree. They’re a priority for me too.”

  She leaned in, bringing her lips to his till they almost touched. “I so appreciate your concern for them.”

  “How can I not? Even apart from being related to you, Skeeter is a good boy. Little Buster, he is a sweet child as well.” He eased out of the bed.

  “I’m glad you think so.” Ellen sat, reluctant to do anything more.

  “I do. Now, if you can stand, we need to get going.” He went to his horse, opening a saddlebag for the blankets.

  She tried standing, unable to get her legs to cooperate. After a little bit of struggle, Ellen rolled to her side, then stomach. She did a push up from there to get to her knees. Bracing herself and with a little grunt, she pushed herself to stand. The sound of Del snickering caught her attention. She faced him, grimacing. “I suppose you think this is funny?”

  “I’m trying not to, but….” He shrugged. “Can I help that you are so adorable?”

  Ellen stared up at the sky as if her patience rested up in the clouds. “If I could walk, I’d go over and show you how lovely I don’t feel this morning.”

  “Oh, poor little be’be’!” He went and scooped her into his arms. “You are sadly injured and here I am, mocking you.” Del tossed her an inch or so out of his arms and caught her, making Ellen laugh. “You are a little be’be’! So light and feathery.”

  “If you say so, I’ll pretend to agree.”

  “I do say so.” He kissed her forehead. “Now, back onto the horse you go.”

  “No,” she whined but put her leg over the horse’s back and sat.

  “See? The dreading was worse than the doing.” He got onto the horse, careful not to nudge her with his foot, and clicked at Pomme.

  They went ten miles before seeing any sign of the trail. At last, she saw a group of wagons rolling in the distance ahead. They spent the next hour or so skirting the narrow valley caused by a thin ribbon of river. “Del.” She tapped his shoulder and pointed. “Isn’t that our people?”

  Del glanced back at her and cleared his throat. “Ma coeur?”

  She smiled at the endearment. “Yes?”

  “Did you want to wash your face before rejoining your people?”

  “I suppose so.” Ellen had forgotten he wasn’t really one of her kind, and his reminder set her aback. “Why?”

  He traced a finger along her cheek. “You’re painted in my colors. They’ll announce our marriage before you do.”

  “Oh dear!” She rubbed her face, the chalky stripes dry beneath her fingers. “Yes, I’d better wash these off as soon as I can.” At his amused look, she added, “I’ll have enough to explain without tossing a wedding into the mix.”

  “When we reach the river, we will break for noon, clean up your face, and go to your family.” He saw her scratch a mosquito bite and reached back for a light blanket. “Here, wear this.”

  She let her gaze caress his smooth neck. Nothing marred the silky skin. “Why don’t they bite you at all?”

  “They do, then learn I have vinegar for blood.”

  “You?” Now protected, she settled again against him. “No, your blood must be far too sweet. They should be making a feast of you.”

  He stopped at the river as promised, handing her a handkerchief to wash her face.

  “Imagine, an Indian brave with a hankie,” she teased while dipping the cloth in water before scrubbing her face.

  He grinned, and with a very Gallic shrug, said, “I have to wash my behind with something.”

  “What!” She held the hankie by two fingers as far away from her as possible. “Oh dear! It can’t be true. It doesn’t smell like your—oh dear!”

  Laughing, he asked, “And how do you know what my rear smells like? Is there something I should know?”

  She narrowed her eyes at him. “You have to be teasing.”

  “I have to be?”

  “Yes, because you adore me far too much to let me wash with a hiney rag.” She rinsed the cloth and continued to scrub her face, giving him a defiant look.

  “Hmm, I suppose you are right. How could I kiss you if that were my ‘hiney rag’?” He shook his head. “Not possible.”

  Rinsing the last bit of paint from the cloth, she stood. “Do you even have a hiney rag?”

  “Non, don’t be silly.” He hopped onto his horse, holding his hand out to her. “I have a hiney blanket used to repel mosquitoes with its bad smell.”

  She laughed at his statement, secretly hoping he teased. Ellen wrapped her arms around him. She didn’t want this to end. Living at the camp with him now and having no contact seemed unbearable. Not wanting to say anything for a while, she at last decided to prepare him.

  “Del?”

  “Hmm?”

  “We need to talk. We’re getting close to the others, and I need to tell you a few things.”

  “All right, continue, ma Ellen.”

  Him saying her name distracted her. For a moment, she forgot what she wanted to say. The fort ahead of them jogged her memory. “Because of who you are, my father will blame you personally for Lucy’s death.”

  “Yes, blame the French blood for everything.” He glanced back at her and winked.

  “I’m not even going to respond.” She paused for only a moment. “Drop me off half a mile away and let me walk to Fort Hall on my own.”

  “Why would I do such a thing? I’m not willing to leave you alone that far from me.”

  Had he not heard and understood that he’d be blamed for her kidnapping? “Del, you simply must. I can walk such a short way without incident.” She paused, not wanting to hurt his pride or feelings. “I’d rather you not talk with my father just yet. If he learns you think we’re married, well, I don’t want you to hear the nasty things he’ll say about you.”

  “I think we’re married?” He snorted. “There were witnesses.”

  “I’m glad Pa wasn’t one of them.” She sighed. “I don’t want to hear any of the ugly things he has to say either, but I’ll have to tolerate him for Skeeter and Little Buster’s sake.”

  “You aren’t telling him we’re married?”

  Ellen shook her head and patted him on the shoulder. “I think it’s for the best. Even if we were in a real wedding, my father will never accept you.”

  He pulled back on the horse’s reins, stopping Pomme in his tracks. “What he accepts doesn’t matter. We are bound by a real marriage. The only thing lacking is a paper filed in a courthouse. I plan to visit a courthouse with you as soon as possible.”

  The man couldn’t be serious.
Ellen swallowed a lump in her throat. Pa would blow up like a powder keg if he heard a peep about her being Del’s wife. He needed to understand that in no way were they together, for both of their sakes. “No, no one is filing any sort of papers. I mean, maybe a little ceremony makes a bunch of savages think we’re married, but we’re not.”

  “I cannot discuss this with you from horseback.” He slid down, holding his arms out to her.

  She dismounted into his arms. He felt comforting to her and her resolve to deny him as a spouse wavered for a moment. Gathering her wits about her, she stiffened her backbone. “I’m not trying to be difficult but, Del, really. We had no minster. It’s not legal, and my family wasn’t there. My stepmother had just died. We aren’t married, not in any binding way.” As she spoke, Ellen saw his expression change from anger to hurt and back again. She tried to placate him. “Yes, in the village, we were sort of married. There was paint; I love the beads.” She pulled the glass and shell beads from around her neck, holding them out for him. “And the kissing? Goodness, I’d never imagined something so wonderful. Still, you have to admit, as someone who is legally trained, we can’t be considered married in any binding way.”

  He took what she offered and stared at the necklace. Swallowing as if he had a lump in his throat, Del stated, “It’s very binding to me and very binding to my people.”

  “Oh, goodness.” Not wanting to listen to him anymore, she wrung her hands. “My father will be furious I’ve spent so much time with you as it is without all this added to his anger.” Ellen began pacing. “Best to just say you felt compelled to help Sam by getting me back to the group as soon as possible.” Stopping, she looked at him. He stared up at the sky, still holding his beads. “Does that sound like a good story to you?”

  “Yes,” he said through gritted teeth. “I can say such things to others, but not to you.” Del took her by the arms and stared into her eyes. “Despite what you say, I consider us very married. You are my wife and I am your husband. Whatever your father thinks of this fact is irrelevant.”

  “This isn’t good.” Ellen pulled away from his grasp, panic and bile rising in her throat from the fear. “You don’t understand at all. You can’t just touch me anytime you want to; you can’t even talk to me any time you want to.” She shook her head, scared he’d never accept what had to happen, or more precisely, what couldn’t happen. “I can’t be near you once we reach camp. I have to make you see that. My father will be grieving for Lucy. If he does with her like he did my mother, it’ll be awful and I need to be there for him.” She studied his face. “Are your parents both still alive?”

  “Yes.”

  “Then you can’t understand how upset my father will be.” She clasped her hands to plead with him. “Del, please help me with this. We can’t continue this marriage game. You used it to save my life and I love you for that, but it’s over now. Before we get to camp, we need to agree on that.”

  He nodded. “We agree. No marriage.”

  “Good,” she exhaled the word with relief and smiled at him. “Thank you so much. You don’t know how much this helps. I don’t have to listen to my father rail against you and blame us both for Lucy’s death.”

  His expression seemed like stone. “Let’s go. They’re at noon now. We can catch them before dark.”

  “Thank you again.” She took his hand, hopping up with a little difficulty. As before, Ellen wrapped her arms around him, melting into his warmth. Unlike every other time, she felt his body tense and remain so. “I’m sorry we have to be so distant when we arrive.”

  He nodded in assent but remained quiet. Weariness stole over her and all Ellen wanted to do was sleep and to do so in a real bed. She stretched her neck a little and scratched her nose against his quiver of arrows. She rather liked the idea of him in a bed with her. Smiling, she wondered what he’d do differently in such a place. “Have you ever slept in a real bed, Del? Wait, I suppose you have in France and all.” She laughed. “Silly me, I’m sleepy. Of course you have; you had to at some point.” Ellen snuggled against him, his body unyielding. “I’m sure your adventures with sleeping in proper beds would make a great story sometime.”

  “I must be clear about a few things, Miss Winslow.” His voice shook with restrained rage. “I have indeed slept in a bed, drank wine from crystal glasses, and have been known to eat from plates using a fork and, yes, a knife. All of these, many times. Not only that, but I’ve attended an opera or two. Though, I admit, not by choice. A lady I was interested in loved Wagner. I have also a law degree and have been known to paint faces on canvas, not just faces for sport.” He turned to give her a glare hard enough to stop a bull in his tracks. “I am also not the only one of my people to do such things. You would be wise to refrain from referring to us as mere savages.” He gave her a tight smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “Now, I hope all this sounds like a good story to you as well.”

  As his speech sunk in, Ellen realized she’d hurt him. Her thoughts had focused only on her father and appeasing him before they ever arrived. She’d discounted how Del might feel being set aside once there. Even worse, she’d already been just as cruel as she expected her father to be to him. Unsure of how to fix this, she asked, “Del?”

  He held up a hand, shaking his head. “Non. No more. We are done talking.”

  She sat away from him, his anger radiating from him like body heat. Tears welled in her eyes, so she looked up to keep them from falling. Ellen’s lower lip trembled as they approached the fort. Unlike Pa, Del had never hit her. She felt his fury through the air alone, and yet he’d not harmed her in any way. If anything, she sniffed, he’d saved her life twice. Tears at last escaped her eyes to roll down her cheeks and she sniffed again.

  “Non.”

  “What?” Her question came out much more watery than she’d intended.

  “Crying does not work with me. I won’t forgive you.”

  She choked back a sob. “I understand. I don’t expect you to forgive me.” Ellen coughed, trying not to bawl like a baby.

  “You have called me a savage for the last time. I have never been brutal to you.”

  “No,” she said in a small voice. “You haven’t ever. You’ve been the opposite, in fact.”

  “I’m glad you admit it.”

  “I do.” She wiped her eyes with her sleeve. After a while, she asked, “Del? Would you feel better if I said I was sorry for the savage comments? All of them I ever made?”

  “Hmm.”

  “And that I’ll never say such mean things again?” She leaned her forehead against his back, sad at the lack of response. Unable to help herself, Ellen started crying, soft at first, but then the more she thought about how kind he’d always been to her, the more she sobbed.

  “Enough! No more crying. I’m not made of stone.” He sighed. “For now, I will do as you wish. We will appease your father. But beware, later, I will want to be married to you in the open, and when I do, you won’t be able to deny me.”

  “All right.” She sniffed. “We’ll cross that river when we get there.” Ellen hugged him and this time, he did melt into her arms. “You are a wonderful man.”

  “Thank you.” He waited for a moment, adding, “You might be a wonderful woman.”

  “Might?”

  “I’m not yet happy with you.”

  “Oh.”

  The fear and shock had left her exhausted, and she spent the afternoon resting against his strong back. They topped a hill and Ellen saw Fort Hall up ahead. The place was a beehive of activity. Every step Pomme took was closer to having to deny her new feelings for Del, and she wanted to avoid the whole mess. Such a thing wasn’t possible, so she thought about everything left unsaid between them.

  “We are nearly at camp. In fact, the lookout has seen us and soldiers are riding this way.”

  Ellen wasn’t ready to let him go just yet. “Where will you be?”

  “My guess is explaining your whereabouts to the commander.”

  T
he men reached them, their blue uniforms faded by a tinge of dust. The lead officer addressed them. “Miss Winslow? Mr. Du Boise?”

  Del responded first. “Yes we are and I’m assuming Sam Granville is at Fort Hall?”

  “Yes. He told us you’d be arriving.”

  Del and the officer looked like complete opposites, one dark and savage, the other fair and refined. Both were handsome and that was the extent of their similarity until she listened to their polite conversation. Ellen looked from one man to the other, amazed at how they talked as if in the finest parlor. The two soldiers on their horses behind their leader squinted at Del. Did they distrust him or were the frowns a result of the sunny day? She had no way to tell until either spoke.

  “I’m glad he did. We’d look suspicious with only us riding here.” Del steered Pomme in step with their leader, the other two flanking them.

  The officer chuckled. “Can’t say I’d disagree, sir.”

  The respect shown had surprised them both. She glanced back at one of the guards and caught his sneer. Ellen swallowed, her mouth now dry from worry on Del’s behalf. He’d been shown nothing but deference in their brief time alone among the Indians. The contrast in how whites treated him versus the natives now seemed huge to her.

  At the fort, the huge wooden doors swung out to them like welcoming arms. The soldiers rode in first, followed by several of the cavalry for their change to fresh troops.

  The leader of their small group fell back as they entered the grounds. “Ma’am, your father is in a bad way.”

  Ellen nodded. “I expected him to be so.”

  He dismounted and held out his hand for her. “I can take you to him while Mr. Du Boise answers some questions. Lincoln, take my horse.”

  She slid down, careful not to fall due to her wobbly legs. Everyone rode away and left her with the officer. Ellen snuck a parting glance at Del, but he didn’t look back at her.

  “Don’t worry, ma’am.” He held out his arm for her to hold. “His bringing you back to us will count heavily in his favor. I don’t reckon he’ll hang for anything.”

 

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