by Teri Blake
“You know I’m going to have to call your father and confront him about this. It’s not even a question. And custody? He will make that a huge fight.” But at least Davin had finally come clean about what he’d done, why he did it, and the fact that it was pot, not nicotine.
“I know. But I’m pretty sure he won’t care. He’ll probably ask you for his pen back. I think he’s used us enough and knows now that having us isn’t exactly a party. Maybe he won’t fight.”
She highly doubted that. And Davin was right, it wasn’t because Rob wanted the kids, it was because it would make her miserable. Davin stood from the chair and Karla got up from the bed. She caught him before he could leave the room and gave him a hug.
“I want you to know that I love you. Even when you do things I don’t agree with, I still love you. This was a scary thing for me and I’m glad you aren’t addicted.”
“I know, Mom. I kinda wish I hadn’t done it. But you can’t change what you’ve already done and I don’t want to do it anymore. Not even when I’m old enough to choose.”
“It’s good you can see that.” She ruffled his hair like she’d done when he was much younger and he rolled his eyes, then left.
She pulled her phone from her pocket and took a deep breath. If she called Rob now, she would still be raw from both talking to Sawyer and talking to Davin. She would jump at the chance to vent and he would turn around and make her life worse, knowing he’d gotten to her. Again.
She returned her phone to her pocket. This time, she would take the time to think through what she needed to say and even talk to her lawyer first. This time, he wouldn’t know what hit him.
Chapter Eighteen
Aryn playfully pushed Channyon to the dining room table where she’d left a pile of pastries and three cups of coffee. Sonica was already sitting there, picking at something with a red tart glaze on top.
Channyon took the seat not taken and lowered into it. For almost two weeks, she’d hidden that Becker had left and the secret ate away at her. Her marriage had been a secret from Karla, mostly to keep her from having to ask Rob if she could visit and partly because she hadn’t felt like she’d known Karla well enough anymore to explain how she could fall in love with a man so different from her.
This was just like back home, where all three sisters had sat around a table and talked. Becker had made enough money to provide for them, so they’d gardened and been hippies on the stretch of acreage they had. That had been a sweet period of her life she would never forget.
Aryn handed her something that looked like a braid, but flakey. “Here, you need food to talk.”
“I’m doing the talking? I assumed I’d be listening, since I have nothing to say.”
Sonica laughed. “You might not want to talk to me, but I can still see when you’re hiding something. And we both think that the fact that we haven’t seen Becker in person—as in, he hasn’t even come to pick you up like the gentleman he is—means that he’s not here anymore. So, spill.”
Sonica took a delicate bite of pastry and closed her eyes. “Where did you get these? Karla would be jealous.”
Aryn glared at Sonica. “Hush. Karla has enough going on and I wanted this to be like before. Karla doesn’t know Becker like we do. Yet. I hope she will in time.” She turned her eyes on Channyon. “So, what’s going on?”
Channyon took a sip of coffee and it was obvious Aryn had made it, not Karla. Aryn added orange peel, cinnamon, and nutmeg right to the coffee grounds to make the brew taste even better. “Where is Karla today?”
Sonica frowned in her melodramatic way. “We aren’t really sure. She got up early like usual, went out to the build site to check progress, then shut herself in her room. That part isn’t like her at all.”
Aryn nodded. “And she wasn’t talkative. She didn’t stop for a cup of coffee or even say good morning. It was like she’d shut herself off after she got the kids to school. I mean, I know it’s Monday, but…” She shrugged.
Channyon set down her cup and enjoyed the moment with her sisters. The three of them hadn’t come together in a long time and just…talked. “Sonica, I owe you an apology.”
Sonica didn’t bat an eye. “I know, I figured it would come eventually.”
Their sisterly friendship could withstand a lot, but not an unsaid apology. There would be a wall between them until she fixed it. “I never should’ve believed that you would have an affair with Becker. The whole time, all I could think was, who wouldn’t want my husband? He’s amazing. I didn’t even consider that you two aren’t compatible. I’m sorry for ignoring my better judgement, knowing that you wouldn’t do such a thing.”
Sonica sighed deeply. “No, I wouldn’t and we’re not. He’s stuffy and cerebral.”
“And you’re overly dramatic sometimes.”
She held up her coffee cup like they were making a toast. “But I’m consistent and sort of fun.”
And still so close to a child. Or it seemed that way from this side of thirty. Becker wasn’t interested in anyone younger than his wife and she should’ve known that. “You’re you and I wouldn’t want you any other way. I’m sorry for pitching a fit and making a mess of things. I’m sorry for accusing you of something so horrible.”
“Well, you know I’ve forgiven you because I never really held it against you.”
Channyon was the one who’d built the wall and she was the one who’d guarded it. But once there, she didn’t know how to take it down other than the apology.
Aryn refilled her cup from the carafe sitting on the wide windowsill. “Now, about Becker. Where is he?”
Becker was a tender subject, even if she’d only spoken about him in her mind. “He left two weeks ago to go work on a case back home.”
Aryn and Sonica both sighed but it was Aryn who replied, “I was afraid of that.”
“He came over and explained what he could. A little boy needed his help and he had to go. If I didn’t let him, I would look like I don’t care about children. I do…but I want Becker here.”
“You do?” Both women asked at once.
She hadn’t told them about all the talks and how honest and tender he’d been. She hadn’t been ready to tell him she loved him when he left, so telling her sisters seemed very premature. Now, she wanted to hug him close and tell him just how she felt. She wanted them together again.
“I do. I’d leave and go back to him right now if I had any reason to believe he wanted me there.”
Sonica tilted her head slightly. “How do you know he doesn’t? You’ve been talking while he’s gone, right? I mean, that’s the reason you’ve been going out all these nights is to talk to him on the phone without us hearing…right?”
If only that were the case. She would’ve loved to sit and talk with him all those hours. “Well, I sent him a text a week ago and he hasn’t replied. I didn’t hear from him at all the week before.” And ever since then, she hadn’t allowed herself to look at her phone like she had been the first week. If he wasn’t going to call, then he was too busy or not interested.
Aryn held out her hand. “Let me see your phone. That doesn’t sound like him at all.”
Channyon dug it out of her back pocket and handed it over. “I told him I missed him and then nothing. Not that I expected him to call me every day, or anything.” Though one phone call would’ve been nice.
Aryn swiped around on her phone, then frowned. “You never actually sent it. It’s sitting there like you’re still typing it up. You must have missed the send button or something.” She pressed the screen. “It’s sent now.”
“So he left to work a case. How long will that take, and did he say he was coming back?” Sonica grabbed another tiny pastry.
Channyon had never really paid attention to the beginning and ending of any cases while they’d been together. Aryn’s was the only one she was a part of and that was different from what Becker was doing now.
“I’m not sure. I think it’s different with every case.”
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Aryn nodded. “With me, there was a lot of meetings and discussions at first. I had to pay him right away before any of that. Then after he’d gathered what he needed to prove that I wasn’t crazy, that Jager was dangerous to me and had hurt me, we had to file civil charges, since there was never a criminal case against him. I reported the assault, but nothing was done. He was arrested for one night, that’s it. Then they released him to come after me again.”
“But he didn’t because we were there.” Channyon could still remember the feeling of her father’s old gun in her hands, sitting by the door. If anyone was going to jail who wasn’t Jager, it was her. She would always take the hit for her sisters.
“Thank God he never came that night.”
“But he did come later.” Aryn closed her eyes and a tear trailed down her cheek. “I never said anything. You were both in the way back garden days later. I didn’t feel well. I was worried I was pregnant and then he just showed up…”
“I’m glad you weren’t pregnant after all that, but what did he say to you?” Channyon hadn’t ever heard of his return.
“He begged me to take him back. He said he was sorry. He brought me a ring and told me he would make it up to me for the rest of my life.” She glanced up and there was a world of hurt in Aryn’s eyes that had never been there before. “He told me he was a really good guy and that he just had a lapse in judgement.”
Channyon couldn’t control her breathing or her words. “If I’d have known he was there, I’d have kicked him to kingdom come.”
Sonica just shook her head. “He’s wrong, you know. He wasn’t a good guy. Tim is a good guy. Jager was a jerk from day one.”
“You just thought that because he didn’t like you,” Aryn snapped.
“No, she’s right.” Channyon hated when Aryn and Sonica snipped, but they were so opposite. “Jager wasn’t a good guy. We saw bits and pieces that made us worry, but you were an adult. You were allowed to choose the man you love.”
“I never loved him. I loved going out. I loved sleeping with him…but never again. Never. I’ll die before I sleep with another man.” She pulled her feet up onto the chair cushion and curled into a little ball, hugging her knees.
“We told you not to sleep with him,” Sonica pointed out. “It’s not just about babies, you know. It’s not even completely about emotional attachment. Once you sleep with a guy, he can get to you on every level.”
“Ain’t that the truth.” Aryn rested her forehead between her knees.
“I’ll say it again. Tim would never. I wish I’d said something with Jager, but you seemed so happy and I thought maybe I was wrong.” Channyon topped off her coffee to heat it back up. “I wish I’d said something.”
Aryn lifted her head and laughed as another tear streaked down her cheek. “Not like I would’ve listened. I do my own thing. Always have.”
“I can’t see you being alone forever,” Channyon said.
“I won’t be. I have my sisters. Except for Karla who—yet again—has found a man. At least this time he seems to be the kind who won’t cheat. And Channyon, you’ll get back with Becker, despite what you think right now.”
Sonica chuckled. “I guess it’s you and me.”
Aryn unfurled from her position and sipped her coffee. “You know, the more I think about it, the more this just seems like something Becker would do. He has always been about kids. Even with my case way back when, I knew that any case he had involving kids would come first. I never felt like he wasn’t a good lawyer, but he defends kids.”
And if he felt that way, he would never change his mind about having them. She loved him, but adopting had never been the way she’d wanted to have a family. There wasn’t anything wrong with it, she just wanted to have her own. And couldn’t. Which meant that if Becker truly did have a heart for kids, where he was willing to possibly lose her to go back and defend a child, then her marriage was in danger if she didn’t consider his needs too.
Could she adjust her thinking about adoption to please both of them? “I’m worried that if I don’t reach him soon, he won’t come back. I’m worried that I’ll lose him because I’ve been stubborn about what I want. I know that’s okay, I can be. Having children should be something we both agree on. But…since I can’t…” She picked up her spoon and stirred her coffee. “I don’t know. I just feel like I might have to make sure he knows that there’s give and take. That we can work this out, instead of him working to fix it without me.”
“Give him at least a day to reply to your text. At this point, he also thinks two weeks have gone by since you talked to him. Maybe he feels like he’s lost you.” Sonica pushed away from the table. “There, we are all caught up, except for Karla. She hasn’t gotten used to sharing yet. I don’t know that she ever will.”
Channyon took in a deep breath. “Karla has had to keep her perfect façade life for fifteen years. Without us. She’s taken on that stress and lived with it. I know she’s been dealing with Davin, but I think that’s mostly over. I haven’t smelled anything from his room and I’m right next to him.”
Sonica shook her head. “I only heard he was caught smoking from Maisy when she mentioned he was in suspension. No one tells me anything.”
“Well, no one is ever quite sure how you’ll take it. We’ll need to work harder to invite Karla to these chats so she can talk her problems out with us instead of carrying them alone.” If she’d had to worry about Becker for much longer, she wouldn’t have been able to stand it. Life was made for friends to share burdens.
“I think part of the problem is that she usually shares what she’s going through with Sawyer. If those two marry, she won’t need any of us.”
So there was a sliver of hope that she could leave with Becker and start a life with him. If Karla didn’t need her, then she could because the others could rely on Karla like they had once relied on her. “Where will you both go if that happens?” The house belonged to Sawyer, though he’d purchased it for her and her sisters. When she left, they would have to rely on Karla for a place to live.
She didn’t want to come right out and say her sisters needed to find a new place to live if she left, but for once, she wanted her husband all to herself. They were welcome to visit. She’d also realized she wasn’t the kind who enjoyed running an inn. Hospitality was in Karla’s blood, not hers.
“I will probably stay here with Karla, even if we aren’t needed as her support system. She’ll need us to help with the inn and I enjoy doing it.” Sonica picked up the plate and headed for the kitchen.
Aryn grabbed the carafe of coffee and followed. “I will probably stay. I like it here. Tim won’t ever be a forever guy, but he is good for now. He’s smart and ecologically conscious…”
“And he likes you?” Channyon wondered what Aryn would do if she ever fell again. Would she run, like Channyon had, or would she have a melt-down? Maybe neither. After trauma, any response was on the table.
“I already know he likes me. I don’t want to be one of those girls who strings him along, but I can’t seem to stop. I like to flirt and have fun. I love being out in his flower garden and just laying in the flowers. He laughs at me, but it’s like heaven.”
She hadn’t realized Aryn had been spending so much time at Tim’s house. “How in the world do you find him at home?”
Aryn shrugged then poured the coffee into the sink. “He sends me texts when he gets home late, telling me he’s turned on the fairy lights in his garden. I usually run over there.”
At some point, Aryn would have to face what she was feeling and if she did it after Channyon left, she might have to face it alone.
Chapter Nineteen
There was nothing more Karla could research as she shut her laptop. She put her phone on speaker and hit Jake’s number. There was no money to pay him, but he would be needed if there was a change in custody. He’d offered to do the separation free as Becker’s friend, but this was different.
Jake’s secretary answe
red, then transferred the call to his office. “Jake Addleson speaking.”
“Jake, this is Karla Maples.”
“Oh, I didn’t expect to hear from you again so soon. I thought with Rob out of the state, things would be quiet for you for a while.”
“They were, but only while the kids were with him.” She took a deep breath, not sure where to start. “Davin and Maisy have decided they don’t want to see him anymore. There are reasons, good reasons, I feel. But I want to know how much trouble it would be to re-negotiate our custody agreement?”
She heard him scratch his chin over the phone. “Well, it could be a headache, depending on how much trouble he gives you. See, neither of your children are old enough to make that decision yet. Fourteen is close, but…it would be a tough sell. If Rob fights, you could end up in court. Are you prepared to take this as far as it could go, when you already have an agreement that only gives him four months out of the whole year?”
He made her sound greedy, but her reasons were good. “Yes. Neither of them felt like he wanted them to be there. Davin came home with a pot smoking habit. This just isn’t a good environment for them.”
“You can’t really blame a new habit on their father without knowing for sure that’s what happened. Kids will tell you about anything to avoid getting in trouble.”
Maybe some kids, but Davin wasn’t usually a storyteller. He’d been so heartwarmingly honest his entire life that coming up with a story as detailed as what he’d told her after all her questions would be completely outside his character.
“He didn’t try to avoid trouble, or even blame. But when I asked him where he got the supplies, he told me they were his father’s. His father is smoking pot around his children. And while it started out as something he did medicinally, he switched to vaping and buying everything online.”
“I don’t know the laws in Arizona as far as medical marijuana, but I know what you order online is different and you don’t need a prescription to get it and I think you can have it sent to almost every state. You only have to be an adult, which he is.”