She raised her eyes to meet his. “I think true love is so rare that when you find it, giving up something for the good of the relationship isn’t a sacrifice. It’s a gift.”
Derek didn’t say anything, yet the lost look in his eyes said it all. He didn’t believe her. And she didn’t understand why that hurt, but it did.
For a second she wished she could retract her words. But they were the truth. Even though she’d never experienced that kind of love, she was always hopeful and she knew she’d give up just about anything to keep hold of it.
She forced a cheerful smile. “I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Derek. From what I hear, you can have any woman you want. So I’m sure you can choose one who won’t make you give up your basketball career.”
Derek reached over, picked up the tray and placed it on the bureau.
“You heard wrong.” He sat on the bed and took her hand. “Listen to me,” he urged. “All the parties, the late nights, the fake hookups—”
“Wait a minute,” she interrupted, slipping her hand from his. “Fake hookups?”
He nodded. “It’s all my manager’s doing. Tony simply leaks a woman’s name to a couple of entertainment bloggers and within hours it’s all over the web that I’m dating her.” His tongue clicked against his teeth. “I’m always the last one to know.”
Her brow knit in confusion. “And what about the parties and the other stuff? Does Tony set those up, too?”
“Some he does. But most times it’s just me and the guys from the team getting together and blowing off some steam after the game.” He shook his head. “Trouble is, I’m the only one who has a problem getting up in the morning, which is why I’m usually...”
“Late for practice,” Natalie finished.
“Right. Tony makes it seem to the media like I’m mayor of my very own Sin City.”
“Why does he do it?”
Derek sighed. “In his mind, it’s all about marketing. The badder my audience thinks I am, the more ticket sales and endorsement and sponsorship deals I can generate.”
Natalie’s heart sank. “I still don’t understand why Tony hired me.”
“He did it to please the owner, to show him that I’m trying to get it together,” Derek explained. “There’s been rumors of me being traded to another team. If I get traded before my contract is up, Tony loses his stake in the money I bring in. He’s finished.”
She shook her head. “Wow. It seems like there’s more drama in basketball than reality TV.”
He laughed and stood. “Anyway, you’re off the hook. I’m sure Tony doesn’t expect anything good to come out of your coaching sessions. Get dressed and I’ll meet you downstairs in a little while.”
Natalie pushed the covers off her body and swiveled out of the bed. She wasn’t going to let him get away so easily this time.
She caught his hand. “What are you talking about, Derek? I’m not going anywhere until you are reunited with your father. We had an agreement.”
“And we still do except... I need to ask you a favor.”
“What is it?”
“I don’t want to play Tony’s game anymore. I need you to help me figure out a way to change my image. I want my fans to know the real me.”
“So you don’t want to be a bad boy anymore?” she teased.
“Oh, I do,” he said. “But only with the right woman. My forever woman.”
His forever woman.
The way Derek said those words made her tingle all over. But Natalie knew that to be crowned his forever woman was only a fantasy.
“Derek, I’ll help you in any way I can. But,” she warned, “you may have to give something up along the way. Do you think you can handle that possibility?”
“With you by my side, I can handle anything.”
She smiled, internally glad that he was beginning to have more confidence in her.
Derek picked up the breakfast tray.
His eyes roamed her body, reigniting embers of arousal, and she felt her knees weaken. “Now, even though you look incredibly sexy in that nightgown, and I’ve been pretending that it’s for my eyes only, I’ll let you get dressed.”
After he left, she closed her eyes, indulging in the quivers of heat pulsing in her loins.
She’d never wanted a man the way she wanted him.
“I’m not pretending, Derek,” she whispered. “If you’ll have me, I’m yours.”
* * *
Derek leaned against the Jeep, waiting for Natalie. He could have stayed inside, but some of the Red Hat ladies were reading and reciting Shakespeare in preparation for the play they were going to see that evening. It was a great excuse to leave so he could watch Natalie walk out to greet him.
Those legs are my paradise, he thought. How he longed to run his hands up and down and between. Last night, he’d dreamed of her legs wrapped around his head as he tasted a sweetness he’d never known.
He hardened instantly at the memory.
It had been so difficult to turn away from her last night. He’d never seen someone look so beautiful just sleeping. He could have lain there all night just looking at her. He wasn’t sure he would have the same restraint this evening. Thoughts of Natalie threatened to consume him like a wildfire.
When he got up this morning, his need to see her was so potent that he’d actually made her breakfast in bed.
He chuckled to himself. He’d never gone to the effort for any other woman, so why her? He didn’t know, but for the first time in his life, he wasn’t afraid to seek the answers.
She approached him then, dressed in a midthigh-length lavender sundress and wedged sandals, both of which set off her lovely legs to perfection. She sauntered slowly, absently, and was searching for something in her purse, unaware that he was watching her from behind his dark sunglasses.
He stood straight, mentally coaxing his erection to behave, although her every footstep toward him was like a lever cranking up his passion for her.
She lifted her head and treated him to a smile that chased away the fears inside him. He’d meant what he said inside earlier. With her by his side, and smiling at him like that, he could face anything.
“Hi. Sorry to keep you waiting. I was looking for my sunglasses, but turns out they were in my purse the entire time.”
Natalie slipped on the tortoise-shell frames, then fluffed the top of her short hair, all with the grace and elegance of a debutante.
“No trouble at all,” he replied. “I was just enjoying the fresh air.”
And looking at you, he added in his mind.
She looked up and shaded her eyes, which was funny since she already had sunglasses on. “Summer’s coming early again this year, I guess.”
Her dress molded the swell of her breasts, teasing him to stare. He wiped his brow, even though he wasn’t sweating.
“I don’t mind. I love the heat.”
“So do I, which is why I wore this dress. Do you think it’s okay for meeting your father?”
Her tone sounded so earnest that he slipped his glasses down the bridge of his nose to appraise her. The diamond heart she wore around her neck glinted in the sunlight. Although her eyes were hidden behind dark sunglasses, he sensed she was seeking his approval, which he was more than willing to give.
“It’s perfect. You look beautiful, Natalie.”
In that dress, Natalie was like a gift waiting to be unwrapped. He wished more than anything that he could see, touch and taste the treasure beneath.
He hardened again. How was he going to keep his hands off her today?
Her smile widened with pleasure. “Thank you. I hoped you would like it.”
After pushing the sunglasses back up on his face, he opened the door. “Let’s go.”
He helped h
er into the car. His mind captured the feel of her soft hand and the image of her legs crossing one another as she made herself comfortable. He wanted to remember everything about her and he wanted all the memories of her to be good.
And they would be, just as long as he didn’t allow their hearts to be entwined. He knew she wouldn’t hurt him. She seemed too sweet for that. But he knew he would eventually hurt her, the way he hurt everyone he loved, and she would never forgive him.
When they had both fastened their seat belts, he started the car and they moved away from the curb. Now that they were on their way to see his father, his stomach began to churn like a tornado.
Natalie opened the window. “Is your dad’s office far from here?”
He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel. “No, just about ten minutes outside of town. Pops always wanted to stay close to his sons, and he thought we would feel the same way.”
His mood turned bleak. He thought about how Wes had stayed in Baker’s Falls despite having the opportunity to move.
He glanced over at Natalie. “Well, I guess he’s got one son who is close by. One out of two isn’t bad.”
She pushed her sunglasses up on her head and looked at him intently. “What really happened with you two? If you feel comfortable telling me, that is,” she added. Her voice was smooth and gentle, coaxing him to reveal more.
Although he wasn’t ready to spill his entire life story, deep down he wanted her to know everything about him. He hoped that by helping him to change his bad-boy image, she would discover a man who just wanted to be loved.
His grip tightened on the steering wheel. “My dad always wanted me to go to college. It was his dream. Instead, I decided to enter the NBA draft and he never forgave me.”
He shrugged, as if he didn’t care, even though he did.
“It was that simple.”
But it wasn’t and he knew it.
He remembered the night of his high school graduation, when he’d told Pops about his decision. It happened right in the kitchen where he’d eaten breakfast this morning. They’d both left the room disappointed and hurt. And they’d never spoken again.
The old anger suddenly gelled inside.
“Do you know how many fathers would die to have their sons playing in the NBA? It’s every dad’s dream! It was my dream! I never understood why he was unhappy about my decision.”
After all these years, Derek couldn’t believe how much it still hurt inside to think, or even to talk about what happened. He wondered if he’d ever get over his anger and resentment.
Natalie touched his arm and he immediately felt calmer and more peaceful. He was beginning to like the effect she had on him.
“Maybe he knew that someday the dream would end,” she offered. “Maybe he wanted you to be prepared for that day, so you would know what to do in the next phase of your life.”
He blew out a breath. “I’ll never quit playing basketball,” he insisted.
But that was a lie. As he got older, the likelihood that he would suffer serious injury increased. The game of professional basketball, like any other professional sport, was just hard on the body. Period.
How many more years did he have before his reflexes started to be less than keen and his bones ached for longer than a day? It was time he accepted that someday his jersey would be retired. What would he do then? He truly didn’t know.
“Pops said I would regret my decision someday.”
“Well, do you?”
He thought a minute. He didn’t regret the great teammates he’d had, some of whom had become great friends, or the cities he’d traveled to, or the money he’d made over the years.
The women he’d met? He’d never expected to fall in love with any of them. Until Natalie.
His heart raced. Was that what he was experiencing now? Was he falling in love with her?
His suspension was only for three games and then he was back on the court. He’d hardly had the chance to get to know her. Yet he knew it was best to tamp down the feelings, if that’s what they were, rising within him.
There were too many things that would get in the way of loving her. His travel and practice schedule, late-night games, the paparazzi and the press. But he knew those were only excuses for the truth: he couldn’t bear disappointing someone else he loved. Deep down he knew that’s why he never got serious about any woman, why he consistently brushed them aside in favor of his first love. In his heart, he knew he couldn’t have both: a serious relationship and a career in basketball.
Falling in love would mean he’d have to give something up and he wasn’t sure he was ready.
Would Natalie ask him to give up his career in the NBA? He remembered that she thought true love brought with it the gift of sacrifice. Just thinking about not playing basketball made his heart drop in his chest. After that, he just felt empty.
True love would have to wait.
“The only regret I have is hurting my dad,” he responded thickly as he pulled into the nondescript parking lot of Lansing Commercial Cleaning Services. The one-level brick building in front of them was nicely landscaped. He cut the engine and stared straight ahead.
“Derek?” Natalie asked. “Are you all right?”
He slowly put his sunglasses on the dashboard, then leaned back against the seat.
“I don’t know what to say to him.”
Derek looked at the building and gripped the steering wheel, trying but failing to keep the panic out of his voice. “Tell me, Natalie. What do I say?”
She reached over and turned his face toward hers with her palm. His breath rushed out of him with surprise. Her movements were bold, yet her touch was soft and caring.
“Just say what’s in your heart,” she whispered.
When she released his face, his emotions were churning and he felt as if she’d opened his eyes to what had been there all along. He just couldn’t see it.
Without thinking, he cupped his hand around her neck and the world seemed to disappear as he closed his eyes and guided her lips to his. They tasted of ripe peaches, a sun-radiant burst of glorious wonder.
His movements were tentative at first. He wanted to focus on her rather than on the intense need she drove within him.
The need to devour.
She leaned into him, kissing back unrestrainedly, and he wanted to shout with joy. The tip of his tongue dipped into her mouth and she groaned. Opened deeper. So he slid inside and discovered a velvety warm place he wanted to explore forever.
Abruptly he ended the kiss and leaned back in his seat.
“I just wanted to show you what was in my heart,” he said in a low voice.
Natalie nodded, her eyes dancing with mutual desire. He gazed at her lips, full and ripe. His kiss was only a glimpse of what he was starting to feel for her, a sneak preview of the sensual experiences he wanted to have with this woman.
But she deserved more than just one night with him. She deserved a lifetime of love. And he knew he wasn’t ready to give that to her yet. Maybe he never could.
Without another word, he got out of the car.
He opened the passenger door, the taste of her mouth still on his lips. He could fall in love with that taste. With her.
“Let’s go before I kiss you like that again.”
She smiled and he took her by the hand, and they walked into the building together.
The receptionist greeted them. “How may I help you?”
She took no special notice of Derek and for once, he was glad he wasn’t recognized.
Reluctantly he let go of Natalie’s hand. “I’m here to see James Lansing.”
She looked at the couple and then turned to her computer screen. “Do you have an appointment?”
Just then, a door down the hall opened. His heart l
ifted when he spotted his father walking toward him, limping slightly. Derek racked his brain for a moment, trying to remember if Pops had walked like that when he and his brother were younger.
The secretary swiveled in her chair.
“Oh, Mr. Lansing, there you are,” she said cheerfully. “You have a visitor.” She put a fist to her mouth. “Oh, but I didn’t ask his name, silly me.” She turned back to Derek. “What is your name, sir?”
His father stood a few feet away, but the emotional chasm was wider, with years of hurt and pain between them.
At first neither man said a word and it seemed as though the room had narrowed until there was no sense of time at all. Derek was certain that if Natalie wasn’t standing by his side, he would have turned tail and run.
His father was the first to speak.
“I already know his name,” he said in the same stern tone he’d used when Derek was a child. “And you can tell him I’m busy. My schedule is booked today and for the rest of my life.”
Derek sucked in his stomach, helpless against a mix of hatred and fear bubbling inside as he watched his dad limp back down the hall to his office.
Derek slammed open the front door so hard he almost broke the glass, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to get away. From his dad, from the look of confusion, but mostly from the look of pity on the secretary’s face, on Natalie’s face, from everyone and everything.
I should have never come back here.
Tears stung his eyes as he ran.
“Derek, wait!” Natalie shouted, desperation in her voice.
He looked back and she was running after him, as best as she could in those heels of hers.
He stopped, concerned that she would fall and break an ankle. He did not want her to get hurt; he didn’t need any more pain on his conscious. He had enough to last three lifetimes.
While she was still a long way off, he bent at the waist and wiped at his eyes, hoping Natalie would think it was sweat. What would she think seeing the bad boy of basketball crying?
When she caught up to him, he straightened and turned, his face burning with anger and shame.
“Derek, I’m—” Natalie’s voice broke.
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