His Heart's Desire

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His Heart's Desire Page 19

by Julianna Douglas


  When Becca reached Ethan's office, she raised her hand to knock on the door, but she needn't have bothered. What she saw through the narrow opening made her knees nearly buckle and her heart plummet to the floor. Her hand flew to her mouth as a small gasp escaped her constricted throat. Instantly, she turned and all but ran back down the hallway.

  In her haste to escape the sight of Ethan kissing Lindsay, she nearly plowed into Cathy as the other woman exited the elevator.

  “Sorry.”

  “That's OK. Hasn't Mr. Montgomery come out yet?” the secretary asked.

  Her emotions numb, her mind racing, Becca could barely form a coherent thought. “Um...no. P–please tell him I'm not feeling well and went home.”

  “All right. Are you sure you're OK?” Cathy inquired with concern.

  “Yeah, I'll be fine. I think I feel a migraine coming on.”

  “Aw...” Cathy crooned with sympathy. “Well, you go home and get some rest. I hope you feel better soon.”

  By now, Becca was already on the elevator. “Thanks,” she replied weakly as the doors slid shut.

  Becca bit her lip and willed herself not to cry until she was away from the building. Once again, the ride seemed to take forever, but this time for a completely different reason. The moment the door opened on the parking garage, Becca bolted for her car. Tears slid down her cheeks as she fumbled with her key several times before finally fitting it in the lock. Inside the vehicle, she finally released all her anger, disappointment, and sorrow in a round of gut-wrenching sobs.

  When Lindsay jumped into his lap and kissed him, Ethan was utterly blindsided. He'd had suspicions that she might want to hook up with him again, but he never expected her to do anything like this. For a moment he couldn't even think, but when his brain finally started processing what was happening, he immediately shoved Lindsay away, unceremoniously dumping her on the floor.

  From her sitting position on the carpet, she looked up at him with a stunned expression.

  He felt a bit guilty for pushing Lindsay. “Look, I'm sorry for being rough with you, but...” He shook his head still trying to make sense of the situation. “But what the hell!” he finally finished, still unable to articulate much else.

  Now she was starting to look a little hurt. “I thought if I reminded you of how good things were between us, you might want to rekindle what we had a couple of years ago.”

  “What we had?” Ethan felt like he'd just walked into an episode of the Twilight Zone. “How good it was?” He pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lindsay, I have no idea what you're talking about. We went out to dinner a few times. We never had anything.”

  “Well, it meant something to me,” she ground out, her mouth twisting into an unattractive moue. Now she was obviously pissed.

  “Look, I don't think I did anything to lead you on, and if I did, I'm sorry, but let me make myself very clear. I have never had feelings for you, Lindsay, at least nothing beyond those of an acquaintance or a business associate. I don't think you can even call what we have a friendship. I'm sorry if that hurts you, but I can't have you going around thinking that we might start dating again, because it's not going to happen. Ever!”

  Ethan extended his hand to help Lindsay up, but she brushed it away like a petulant child, rising to her feet on her own. “Fine!” she shouted. “Go to your precious little bitch. But when you get tired of her skinny little body, remember, you could have had a real woman!”

  Lindsay flashed her generous breasts–which were practically spilling from her bra–at him before savagely closing her blouse. Then she snatched up her bag and flounced from his office, slamming the door emphatically behind her.

  Feeling a headache coming on, Ethan propped his elbows on his desk and massaged his temples. God! What was that woman thinking, attacking him like that? He had kissed Lindsay a couple of times when they dated, but he hadn't felt an ounce of desire for her then. Now he felt less than nothing, if that was possible. He realized that most men would kill to be in his shoes, having a beautiful blond bombshell like her ready to jump his bones, but he wasn't most men. There was only one woman he wanted to be kissing, and it wasn't Lindsay.

  Even though he never had feelings for her, he hadn't believed Lindsay was a bad person, yet he was beginning to think that Nathan and Alex were justified in their dislike of the woman. She'd just shown him a whole other side of herself that he hadn't seen before.

  Ethan's thoughts were interrupted by Cathy entering his office. “Is everything all right, Mr. Mont...” She hesitated a moment upon seeing his shirtless state before faintly finishing his name. “...gomery.”

  With a deep sigh he replied, “Yeah. Nothing you need to worry about, Cathy. And by the way–this is not what it looks like.”

  Cathy smiled. “Wasn't thinking a thing, sir. My lips are sealed.”

  Cathy's trustworthiness and discretion were two of the reasons she had been his secretary for so long. “Good,” he said, then indicated the garment that Lindsay had carelessly tossed over the back of a chair. “Could you hand me that shirt, please?”

  While Cathy did as he'd asked, she commented, “Boy, the ladies sure can't get out of here fast enough today.”

  “Ladies?” Ethan asked, with emphasis on the plural, as he stood to don the shirt and began buttoning it.

  “Yes, sir. Miss Harris nearly ran me over as I was coming down the hall to your office, and right before that, Miss Anderson did the same as I was getting off the elevator. Are you sure everything is OK?”

  Instead of answering, he asked a question of his own. “Miss Anderson?” His brows drew down into a frown. “What was...? Oh God! Today's Tuesday, isn't it?”

  “Yes, it is,” Cathy answered.

  Ethan sank weakly into his chair. “I forgot.”

  “Forgot what?”

  “Nothing.” He waved his hand dismissively. “Did Becca say anything before she left?”

  “That she wasn't feeling well–something about a migraine–and that she was going home.”

  Ethan struggled to gather his thoughts so he could figure out how to deal with the situation. Right now, he was feeling like he needed a stiff drink, but that probably wouldn't do much for the muddled state of his brain.

  After closing his eyes for a moment and taking a deep breath, a plan began to form. “Here, could you take care of these contracts for me, please?” He handed her the sheaf of papers. “I don't have any more appointments today, do I?”

  “No, sir.”

  “Good. Hold all my calls. I'm taking the rest of the day off.”

  Cathy gave him a sunny smile. “Certainly.”

  Once he was alone, Ethan opened his laptop and went straight to FTD.com. While perusing the floral arrangements, he picked up his phone and speed-dialed Nathan.

  Nate's voice came over the line. “Hello.”

  “Hey, you busy, bro?”

  “Not really. Why?”

  “Could you meet me at my office for lunch in half an hour?”

  “Sure, what's up?”

  “Sorry for the short notice.” Ethan sighed. “Let's just say, I screwed up pretty badly and could use some advice.”

  Ethan thought he detected a huff of laughter from Nate before he answered, “All right, bro, I'll see you in thirty.”

  After ending the call, Ethan went back to his other mission. Once the contracts were signed and he was released from that pressure, he had hoped to find a way to tell Becca how much he loved her. He realized he certainly wouldn't be winning any points by missing their lunch date. Sparing no expense, he placed a huge order with the flower shop before heading downstairs to meet Nathan.

  Chapter 14

  Becca wasn't sure how she got home. She had traversed the route by rote and was barely able to see the road in front of her through the blur of tears filling her eyes. Shoulders slumped, she plodded up the sidewalk to her apartment. A sense of déjà vu washed over her. It was nearly a repeat of last Friday night, except the circumstances t
his time were far worse.

  She stopped at a fork in the walkway and considered for a moment what to do. Rather than heading for her own door, she went in the opposite direction to Edna's.

  At her knock, the petite white-haired lady almost immediately opened the door. One look at Becca's red-rimmed eyes and tear-stained face was all the older woman needed in order to know something was terribly wrong.

  She took Becca's hand and gently pulled her inside and seated her on the comfortable sofa.

  “Rebecca, dear, what's wrong?” she asked in a motherly tone.

  “You were wrong.” Becca's face crumpled and the tears began to flow again. “He's with her. I told you he didn't want me,” she sobbed.

  Edna enfolded Becca in her arms. “There, there,” she soothed, while lightly patting Becca's back.

  Becca had no idea how long they sat like that, but when no more tears would come, she finally lifted her head. Edna handed her a couple of tissues from a box on the end table.

  While Becca mopped her face and blew her nose, Edna rubbed her knee and said, “Why don't you tell me what happened?”

  In between hiccups and sniffles, Becca recounted her story. “I was going to take your advice. I planned a special picnic lunch and was going to tell Ethan how I feel about him. But he missed our lunch date.”

  “Well, you said he was working on an important business merger. Maybe he got tied up,” Edna reasoned.

  “That's what I thought at first too. But after forty-five minutes went by and he still hadn't come out, I decided to go to his office to say hello before leaving.”

  When Becca hesitated, Edna prompted, “And did you?”

  “No,” she answered, barely above a whisper. Her heart was breaking all over again, thinking about what happened next. “The office door was ajar, so I thought maybe his meeting was finished. I started to knock, but then I saw him with her.”

  “Her?”

  “Lindsay.” Becca could barely hold back the tears to finish. “Ethan wasn't wearing a shirt, and her blouse was open. She was straddling his lap, kissing him.” She could hardly get out the last words before another sob escaped.

  “What did you do then?”

  “I ran. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.”

  “So you didn't see what happened next?”

  “No! Why would I even want to, Edna? She was all but making love to him right there in his office.”

  “Well...” Edna bit her lower lip as she pondered the situation. “I don't know, dear. There's just something about this whole situation that seems fishy to me.”

  Becca shrugged. “She's a beautiful woman. He's a man. They have history. It makes perfect sense that they'd get back together.”

  Edna shook her head emphatically. “No. I know what I saw in that boy's eyes. He's crazy about you.”

  “Well, he has a strange way of showing it, missing our lunch date to hook up with his ex.”

  “See, that's just it,” Edna began again while thoughtfully tugging on her earlobe. “From everything you've told me of Lindsay, she doesn't seem like the kind of girl Ethan would even like, much less want to...hook up with, you said? And with the door open, no less.”

  Becca lifted her shoulders again. “Maybe they forgot it was open.”

  “I don't know.” The older woman tapped her lip as she thought some more. “You told me that Ethan's brother and sister didn't like this Lindsay woman at all. She said some terrible things to you at the party Friday. She's been working with Ethan long enough that she probably knows you have a standing lunch date with him on Tuesday. Ah-ha!” Her eyes went wide as though she just solved a great mystery. “That horrible woman set you up, and Ethan was blinded to her machinations by his kind, trusting nature.”

  “I don't know, Edna.” Becca shook her head incredulously. “That's seems a bit far-fetched even for someone like her.”

  “Maybe, maybe not. But since you didn't stick around to see what happened next, how do you know he didn't push her away and read her the riot act?”

  “He certainly didn't look upset by it,” Becca answered, still feeling skeptical.

  “Well, only time will tell. But even if he did kiss her in a moment of weakness–and he certainly doesn't seem like the kind of young man who would, mind you–I don't think it means anything to him. I know what I saw, and I still stand by my assessment that that boy is in love with you, not that little witch, no matter how attractive you say she is.”

  Becca's shoulders slumped in defeat as she stared at her hands folded in her lap. “I really don't want to get my hopes up. I don't think my heart can take this kind of pain again. Right now, I don't want to think about it anymore.” She glanced at the clock on Edna's wall. “I'm filling in for someone, and I have to be at work in an hour anyway. I'd better go get changed.” She rose from the couch and headed toward the door. “Thanks for listening to me, Edna.”

  “You're welcome, dear. Call me when you get home later. I want to know you're all right.”

  Becca nodded and left.

  * * * * *

  Ethan and Nathan sat in a quiet corner booth of their favorite bar and grill a couple of blocks from Ethan's office. The waitress had just delivered platters of hamburgers and fries along with two ice-cold beers.

  Nathan started the conversation. “Since I met you at your office, all we've been doing is exchanging small talk. On the phone you said something about needing advice. So what's up?”

  Ethan sighed. “Ah, man, it's Lindsay.”

  “What'd she do this time?”

  “What didn't she do?” Ethan returned with chagrin.

  As the two men ate their food, Ethan recounted the torturous contract negotiations and all the events that occurred in his office an hour before.

  When he was through, Nathan shook his head. “I told you that woman was trouble.”

  “I know, bro. You and Alex never did like her. But other than being a little clingy when I broke up with her, she never did anything to make me think she was a bad person.”

  “She was probably being nice to you because she wanted you back.”

  Ethan nodded. “I get that now. I can't believe I didn't see it coming.”

  Nathan chuckled. “It's probably because it's your nature to always see the best in everyone. Sometimes you're just too nice, man.”

  Ethan shook his head in dismay. “Yeah, well, there's one person I wasn't very nice to.”

  “Who's that?”

  “Becca. Thanks to Lindsay's antics, I missed my lunch date with her today.”

  “Yeah, I can see how that might be a problem.” Nathan chewed his last bite of hamburger thoughtfully before wiping his mouth with his napkin and tossing it onto the table. “So...are you ever going to tell that girl how you feel about her?”

  Ethan nearly choked on his beer at the sudden turn in their conversation. When his coughing fit finally ended, Ethan gave his little brother a pointed look. “Where did that come from?”

  Nathan smiled and chuckled softly. “What? You think I don't know you're madly in love with her? You're with her at least twice a week. You brought her as your date to the barbeque. I may have been drunk that night, but not enough that I didn't notice how you were looking at her every time you thought she wasn't paying attention. If I'm not mistaken, she was giving you some longing looks too.”

  Ethan shook his head. “I don't know, bro. I haven't picked up on anything like that from her.”

  Nathan shrugged. “I suppose I could have misread her, but I know I'm not misreading you. So what gives? Why aren't you trying to make her your girlfriend instead of just your friend?”

  Ethan sighed deeply. “Nate, you know how that creep used her right after her mother died. I've been giving her some space.”

  “I can understand that, Ethan, but a whole year? I'd think she'd be in a better place emotionally by now. She seemed to be in pretty good spirits at the party. At least until Lindsay knocked her in the pool.”

  “Yeah, I
felt really terrible about that. I wish she'd let me take her home. That debacle aside, she has been doing really good.”

  “So...what are you waiting for?”

  Ethan leaned his elbows on the table and steeped his fingers. “I don't know. It's just...I don't want to ruin things between us by moving too fast. If she doesn't feel the same way about me, it'll lead to all kinds of awkwardness, and eventually, it would probably end our friendship.”

  “Ah.” Nathan leaned back in his seat and looked Ethan straight in the eye. “So you're scared.” It was a statement, not a question.

  “Hell, yeah, I'm scared,” Ethan replied without hesitation. “I'd rather have her as my friend than not at all.”

  “But at what cost to your future happiness? How long can you go on like this? What if she finds someone else, and you never tell her how you feel? Sooner or later, keeping quiet might end your friendship anyway.”

  Ethan shook his head. “I've been thinking about it a lot lately, but I don't know, Nate...”

  Nathan leaned forward again, pinning Ethan with an intense gaze. “You know I waited too long to ask Jenna to marry me. Now I'll never get the chance to propose.”

  “Are you ever going to stop beating yourself up about that?”

  Nathan's eyes darkened. “Stop changing the subject, Ethan.”

  “Fine. But Becca and I are not you and Jenna. Our situations are totally different.”

  “How so?”

  “Becca and I aren't even in a romantic relationship yet. We're friends. You and Jenna lived together for two years, and you were high-school sweethearts long before that. She knew you loved her, Nate.”

  “Yeah, she knew I loved her. But all she ever wanted was the ring, the big wedding, the kids, the whole nine yards. I could have given her all that. She could have been my wife for those two years. We maybe could have even had a baby. But I never made that commitment to her. I kept making the excuse that we were too young and it wasn't the right time. Now she's dead. None of us knows how long we have, Ethan. She was only twenty-three years old. I think you made my argument for me when you said Jenna knew I loved her. Doesn't Becca at least deserve to know that much?”

 

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